For those who have been following this saga I can honestly say that this is the final post on the subject. In two and a half hours this morning my children's future was safeguarded, albeit not quite how I would have wished in an ideal world.

The occasion was the final hearing in family court for a case that began in the autumn of 2008 when I was unable to even visit to my children.

My barrister told me off for being late, even though I had left home at 0605 and was at the gentle mercies of public transport. After five minutes with her (all we needed as she had represented me in court for almost two years) we were called into the court room so the judge could hear what the issues would be. At this point two of the four parties involved had agreed their position and the third (my ex) wouldn't agree a thing. The fourth would agree but arrived while the hearing was in process.

My ex decided she would argue and demand my daughter back. The judge tried to persuade her this was a bad idea but she persisted to tell him I was a very bad person. He then called a recess and sent everyone out to get an agreement.

The three barristers plus the two social workers (it was a very complex custody case) went to talk to my ex, I went for breakfast. My barrister found me there as I was finishing my coffee and brought me up to date. The ex had been talked round, but now they couldn't get hold of the aunt (who had sent her apologies). I pointed out she attended a course on Tuesdays and kept her phone off!

When I returned to the area outside the court only the ex m-i-l was around. We discussed my daughter's 10th birthday arrangements (a trip into London) and where we'd all meet. Then we talked about plans for the children to visit her at Easter.

Back in court everyone signed up to the agreement which pleased the judge no end (we were done before lunch!). He congratulated my ex for seeing sense and "putting the children ahead of your own wishes" when she withdrew her demand. He was a little condescending!

Basically I have sole custody of my daughter and joint custody of my son (with his aunt). He remains where he is for now but stays with me during school hols, including half-term breaks. While he's with me he and his sister will visit their mother and grandmother, three times a year! That's the minimum and equates to 10 days.

The ex handed me a birthday card for our daughter and asked when we'd be down on Saturday, she was quite put out when I told her it was a London trip. If only she'd read my court statement, it was in there! The ex m-i-l will be there, I gave train times to both of them.

The only open aspect is that of my son. I am utterly convinced he'll decide to live with me but it might not be later this year as I first hoped. The joint custody will help hinder/prevent any silly legal moves (such as guardianship) by the aunt and reinforces that I am very much involved in his future.

Both children told the social worker in January that they wanted this over so they knew where they would be. They have that wish. My son has an option but only he can decide, no-one will force him to relocate unless it genuinely is in his best interests (and who should be the judge of that?)

So endgame is here and the rest of my children's lives started today. My involvement rumbles on a bit longer, there's the small matter of the solicitor's invoice and a signed copy of the court order, otherwise everyone is closing their files. Everyone. The children need not know any of that, it has finished.

Topsy.

Oh, the trains were screwed and it took me 5 hours to get home!