The Family Girl Blogs
(aka "The New Working Girl Blogs")
Blog #10: Waiting for the other shoe,
Since last month, I have been dreading September. I was informed by the bosses that, because of my recent work, I was put on a short list of middle/upper-middle managers that were supposed to be part of the company's so-called "flying squad."
"So-called" because it wasn't an official unit of the company. Essentially, we are the bunch that management would stick the jobs no one else wanted. Sure, they tried to sell it as some kind of honor, that they would trust us to do the business-critical assignments no one else could. But we knew better - we were the bunch low enough on the totem pole that we wouldn't raise a ruckus when we got the scut jobs, but competent enough that admin wouldn't question our being assigned to them. Woe to all hard-working americans who don't have enough tenure to buck the bosses... But would you want to rock the boat, in a business climate like today's?
Anyway, the reason I brought this up is because, a month or more ago, I was "asked" by the bosses to go to the middle east this September, to check on a project that is months behind schedule, over-budget like heck, and hemmorraging money because of penalty fees, and to fix it. I repeat: the middle east. Imagine how a post-op TS like yours truly would fare in the land of 13th century muslim conservativism. I may be acting paranoid, but I can't get rid of the image of an arabian version of a lynch mob after my petite little ass...
I couldn't say no, though I did drop a lot of heavy hints with all concerned parties. So I gritted my teeth, said some prayers and made some preparations, such as look for long-sleeved, high-neck blouses and long skirts. et cetera. I even arranged with Aunt Andrea to help me to upload my posts for me, and email the latest BCTS stuff to/for me, since internet access will undoubtedly be very restricted over there.
But last Tuesday, I was told that HR had my assignment canceled. The grapevine said that the guy who kept on insisting I should go on the assignment has started the paperwork for retirement. The grapevine also said this super-senior guy wasn't too... TS-friendly... I seem to be getting a lot of practice reading between the lines...
But it seems they couldn't very well cancel it as there would be repercussions up and down the chain. The official word is that I couldn't go to the Middle East coz I was needed elsewhere. Someone else is going to the Middle East, and I am now goin to Manila (yay!), to help fix a project which is similarly troubled (the project I worked in last year, actually).
But, instead of going to Manila this week, I'm flying out the following week: the company has postponed all company business-connected flights for now in case of possible... 9/11-connected stuff. Nothing will probably happen, but my company is yellow, and likes to take the safe road. Which is the usual thing for big, old-time, corporate-elephant businesses.
Much has been changed by 9/11. Most know about the big changes - the new complicated security measures in airports, airplanes et cetera, the new mission of the military, the thousand-and-one human-outreach programs, and the rise of Homeland Security. But it has also affected the minutiae of day-to-day life. As it has with me now.
Remembering 9/11 is important, especially today, but the timing is not the best, since 2011 is a presidental campaign year: the danger of these people using today as a means for political chest-thumping is extremely likely. Moe and I are therefore trying to avoid watching TV and the news today. I'm hoping against hope that, through the years, 9/11 won't be trivialized by too much exposure, as so many things have been, and its meaning would disappear and it would become just like any other TV special.
I feel a bit selfish, actually, cluttering my life with the many little inconsequential things that make up my life now instead of thinking of the bigger things, like 9/11. I guess trying to claim a new life for myself, like any TS girl who has hoped for a chance for a normal life, has made me selfish, at least insofar as it concerns these inconsequential things.
But in a way, the meaning of things like 9/11 is that people have the right to live their lives free - of fear, of terrorism, and that it might mean that you need to fight for that sometimes.
Like anyone else, I can't help but think that those responsible for 9/11 might use today for some kind of follow-up attack. What will happen next? When will the other shoe drop? Selfishly, I am glad the office postponed my flight. Just in case.
I guess I need to stop all of this typing. Moe really wants me to help clean up the place before my folks arrive for their visit later. Hope the weather holds so Dad won't be disappointed.
So. Time to help Moe clean up. Seeya later.
To see the old Working Girl Blogs, click this link: http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/19261/working-girl-blogs
To see ALL of Bobbie's blogposts, click this link: http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/blog/bobbie-c
To see Bobbie's stories in BCTS, click this link: http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/14775/roberta-j-cabot
note: pictures used are public-access pictures from the net