I think James T. Kirk (as played by William Shatner) saved me last night.
I had read a story that got me thinking about my rapist, and as I sometimes do, I got very, very angry at him.
We're talking "I wish I could bring you back to life so I could kill you painfully" kind of angry.
And then, out of the blue, I remembered a scene from the original Star Trek where Capt. Kirk faces off against a group who have modeled their society on ancient Greece, but they also have the ability to move objects and control people with their minds. After he defeats them, one of their victims holds a knife to the leader's throat, aching for some payback for the abuse he had suffered at their hands, and Kirk says, "Do you want to be like him?"
I could have sworn it was like the memory was using this line to talk to me.
Because I answered mentally, saying "God help me, no. I don't want to be like him."
And my anger cooled.
Which allowed me to keep going with my day.
Pretty strange and yet kinda cool, no?
Comments
Really cool
Spock saved me from killing my abusive step father and also helped me seek out Zen after the church kicked me out. Those examples we found along the way are so very important in holding the line inside of our selves. We can chose to be better than our personal villeins, that totally defeats them.
Thanks
Huggles
Michele
With those with open eyes the world reads like a book
Perhaps the pain will cool.
I too was raped and dreadfully abused many years ago, and the hate and anger dominated my life for a long time. We each follow our own paths, sometimes to healing, sometimes to prison, or death.
Thankfully, I now wonder how the lives of my rapists turned out. Did they repent? Were they ever sorry? Did their guilt destroy their lives? I can't but find myself wishing that they did indeed grow up, feel remorse, repent and lead decent lives. We were all in our early teens, perhaps barely pubescent.
The same goes for the abuser that inflicted horrifying injury on my body and my mind. Lately, in the twilight of my own life, I see him as a sad, mixed up old man who was merely living out the anger and wrath he felt from his own youth.
Good job lady. I have good wishes for you.
A
No not strange, but so very
No not strange, but so very cool,I am glad that that small epiphany happened for you ,it just lets you know that there is a God who really does love you just as we all do
Your Tweedle Dee, I'm Tweedle Dum
and no you don't want to be like that bum
Who had you dancing to his tune
even when he wasn't in the room
But now you are becoming whole
and starting to reclaim your soul
a life where you can laugh and love;
But what the hell's a "mimsy tove"?
~~big hugs, Veronica
And remember...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifLqzLEB3E0
All's well that ends well.
Ahead warp factor one, Mr Sulu.
Aye-aye, cat captain
Ahead Warp factor one, it is.
Warp factor one?!?
That'll take forever to get anywhere.
oh well, baby steps. :)
That's awesome about your timely Captain Kirk epiphany. That's one thing I liked about Star Trek, it wasn't just shooting bug-eyed aliens, the stories had a moral to them too (usually without getting TOO preachy). And the "giving in to your revenge fantasies and rage can make you just as bad as your abusers" one is a good one. Although the revenge fantasies are very human, and a sign of recovery. But some people never get past them, and take them out on people other than their abusers... and we have a new generation of victims. Not saying that you would do that. Just saying, in general...
Anyway, glad Captain Kirk helped you. :)
Lisa