Blonde Joke-06

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Blonde Joke
Chapter Six
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

How many blonde jokes are there?
None. They’re all true
.

 
“Tommi, don’t worry. It will all come back to you.” Maggie was sitting on Tommi’s bed stroking her hair affectionately. With the help of deep sleep somnipathy, Tommi had just woken after three days. Her comatose state had been the result of shock and acute situational depression. To say her equilibrium was shaky would be like saying the Grand Canyon was a small gully.

“I know you keep saying that, Maggie, but nothing comes back to me. I don’t remember anything. I don’t remember being Tommi Isseksen. I don’t remember having a twin sister named Katrina. I don’t even remember wearing a bra.”

“Well, you’ve been in shock for the past three days. Amnesia is not an uncommon result of a major shock.”

“But I don’t know you. I don’t know this twin sister I’m supposed to have, and I have no idea what kind of shock I might have had.”

“That’s the amnesia, and I, for one, am NOT going to tell you. Not until you are ready to handle it without going back into shock again.” Maggie stopped stroking Tommi’s hair. “Now, you’re pretty weak. Do you think you can stand up with just my help or should I call in Kat to help?” Tommi tried to get up but her arms shook so much she couldn’t do it. “That answer’s that question.” Turning towards the door Maggie yelled, “Kat, get in here and help us out please.”
Moments later Katrina entered the room, her expression clearly worried. “Hi, Tommi. How are you feeling?”

“Who are you?”

Bewildered, Katrina looked to Maggie for an explanation. “She has amnesia. She doesn’t remember anything. Now don’t talk and do as I say and we’ll see if we can help her.”

With each sister taking an arm and providing a lot of support, they were able to help Tommi to the bathroom. The intent was to help her clean herself up. Unfortunately, the first thing Tommi saw was the wall mirror over the sink. The mirror reflected Tommi in the middle, on one side a second Tommi and on the other side yet another slightly younger version of Tommi. Tommi fainted.

“This isn’t going to work, Kat. She’ll never recover fast enough to be of any help to herself or us like this. In fact, I’m starting to worry about dehydration and possibly even true catatonia if we don’t get her to rejoin the human race soon. Let’s get her back to the bed. I’m going to have to use hypnosis to create a minimally functional persona she can live with until she can accept the truth.”

As they carried the now limp form back to the bed Maggie explained what she planned to do and why. Katrina wasn’t happy but had no other alternatives to propose, so she left to allow Maggie to do what she could without interference.

Maggie got a small, jeweled pendant from her jewelry box and some smelling salts from the medicine cabinet and returned to Tommi. A brief whiff of smelling salts brought a coughing and gasping Tommi awake.

“Wha...what happened?”

“You fainted. Look. I have to admit you’re not getting any better. We’ve talked about hypnosis many times in the past. While you’ve never said no, you’ve put it off hoping for a miracle. You’ve been waiting for that miracle for almost 18 months now and I don’t think you can put it off any more. Three days in a near catatonic state are too much to ignore. If you don’t let me try hypnosis we’re going to have to seriously consider hospitalization.” Hands on hips, Maggie stood looking down at a very perplexed Tommi. “Now for the last time, will you please let me try hypnosis?”

“I don’t remember declining its use before.” Tommi’s eyes were filling up. “In fact, I don’t remember any previous counseling sessions.”

“That’s it.” Maggie interrupted with a voice overflowing with concern. “You’re getting worse. I’m going to have to recommend hospitalization.”

“No. Please don’t. Let’s try the hypnosis. Please.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes! Yes! Please! Give it a try. I want to be better.”

“Whew.” Maggie dragged into the living room and plopped down onto the couch next to Katrina. “It’s done.”

“What’s done?” Barbie and Karen came in from the kitchen where they’d been finishing up the dinner dishes.

Katrina frowned. “I’m not sure about this.”

“Oh relax, sis. You know this was the best way to handle her given the situation and you know I’ll undo it as soon as she’s able to function.”

“Yes, but I don’t like it. It tramples ethics and makes me feel like I’m sinking to her level.”
”What level? What’s been done?” Would someone please tell us what’s going on?” Barbie nodded in support of Karen’s request.

Maggie cocked and ear at the sound of a shower starting. “Oh good, she’s started moving around again. I suggested that it would be a good idea for Tommi to clean herself up.” Turning back to the others she continued. “You all know what Tom Brodsky, his father Franklin Brodsky, and through them GTI did to Katrina?” She asked with a nod in Katrina’s direction.

Karen and Barbie nodded in affirmation.

“You also know that Tom Brodsky, or Tommi as we now call her, tried to make my sis here into the proverbial mindless bimbo, but instead got caught in his, or should I say her, own trap. What you don’t know is that Kat managed to switch what was in the syringes with which they were both injected. Tommi is a clone of Kat, brains and all. In effect Kat and Tommi are now twin genius sisters.”

“And the problem here is?” Karen was confused.

“The problem is that Tommi dear seems to have had what lay people call a nervous break down resulting in amnesia, probably due to the shock of finding out that after making her act in a totally ruthless and unethical manner Daddy Dearest was planning on discarding her’ maybe even killing her. Oh, and being a macho jock football player and thinking he was becoming what he thought to be his worst nightmare, a brainless bimbo, probably didn’t help either.”

“But you just said he was a smart as Katrina here.” Karen was confused. “And you’ve told us more times than I care to count how she’s a certifiable genius.”

“Maggie, how nice of you. You added an extra word,” Katrina laughed. “You used to just call me certifiable.”

Maggie ignored her sister’s barb. “I said that’s what she thought had happened to her. She may be a genius, but she thinks she’s becoming a near moron and she’s making a great effort to make it a self-fulfilling prophecy.”

“Anyway,” Maggie continued, “after three days of near catatonic depression Tommi is finally coming around, with a little help from yours truly. It was a close thing. When she saw herself in the mirror, she almost went back into her shell and closed it up behind her. I admit that what I did wasn’t exactly ethical.” Katrina coughed and Maggie stuck her tongue out at her sister and gave her a dirty look before continuing.

“I used hypnosis without giving her full disclosure. I gave her a past, some basic knowledge about being female and some general life goals. They’ll do until she’s able to remember and accept the truth. For now let’s just say that when she comes out please welcome Kat’s twin sister Tommi Sonje Isseksen.” As if it were planned that way, Tommi walked out into the living room with a towel wrapped about her.

“Hi gals, anyone mind if I borrow some makeup? I can’t seem to find mine.”

Katrina looked at the others. Karen and Barbie were noncommittal although their eyes grew wide while Maggie nudged Katrina imperceptibly to encourage her to go help Tommi.

“You have makeup, Tommi,” her twin explained. “It’s just that we share it so much we can never tell what belongs to whom. Just use whatever you want, uh, sis.”

Maggie made slight pushing motions when Katrina hesitated. “Matter of fact, given how poorly you’ve been feeling, why don’t I help you get dressed and put on your makeup.” Katrina headed off to assist Tommi.

Barbie looked at Karen quizzically and then turned to Maggie. “I guess this is better than being curled up in a ball in bed all the time.” Barbie hesitantly nodded in agreement. “Now what happens?”

“Hold that thought. Rather than repeat myself let’s wait for Kat to come back.

“Tommi will be out in a few moments.” Katrina came back into the living room and dropped down onto the couch. “I helped her with her makeup and laid out some clothes for her.”

“Okay girls,” Maggie once again took control of the conversation. “With Tommi back in motion again there will be some loose ends like identification.”

“I can take care of that.” Karen started to raise her hand and then self consciously placed it back in her lap. “I know some folks that can get me any identification we need. It’s illegal of course, and it will cost, but it should stand up to anything short of a PRR. Birth certificate and driver’s license O.K.?”

“Sure...but what do you mean PPR?” Barbie asked.

“That’s two Rs and one P. A PRR, not a PPR. It stands for a ‘physical records review,’ where someone actually checks the original paper files, like for an entry in the births and deaths log of a county to confirm the existence of a birth above and beyond the existence of a certificate. In this age of computers it’s almost never done, so I wouldn’t worry too much about it.”

Maggie cheered and Karen took a quick bow. “Thank you. Thank you. But wait, there’s more,” She offered, imitating the announcers on one of those half hour infomercials. “No civilized human being in this country lives without credit cards.”

Katrina groaned.

“Well said. You’re probably not going to like this next part. I strongly suggest you make your credit cards joint cards Kat. Then we can tell her she just lost her wallet...”

“Yeah.” Maggie jumped in. “We can tell her it’s part of the trauma that’s caused her amnesia.”

“...and when you get the replacement cards, present them to her in a new wallet as a present.”
“Okay. Another piece of the puzzle solved.” Maggie was beaming, but Katrina wasn’t quite as enthusiastic about sharing her credit cards.

“Now, with Tommi taken care of, the problem is very simple, how to force Franklin Brodsky and GTI to act in an ethical manner with respect to Kat here. Katrina’s idea of suing GTI and Franklin Brodsky into submission is a good one, but to go that route we’ll need lots of money for lawyers and even with adequate money it could take years.”

”Actually,” Karen chimed in, “money is the one thing that’s going to be needed in abundance no matter what Katrina wants to do.”

Katrina frowned but agreed. “That’s true. The attorneys I spoke to would not even consider taking on someone as big as Franklin Brodsky without getting their retainers up front and I’ve only got a couple of thousand dollars.”

“That should just barely last you long enough to get you into the office of any attorney good enough to take on Brodsky and win.”

Katrina sadly agreed. “I know; being a research scientist is a dream come true, but the pay stinks. I actually made more money...”

The sentence was never completed. Instead, Tommi made a grand entrance, posing with her knee bent and a hand on the doorframe. She wasn’t wearing the jeans and tee shirt Katrina had laid out for her, instead wearing a super short, yellow and blue cheerleader’s outfit with a deep V neck that Maggie had used in one of her numbers but had not yet returned to the club after cleaning it. Her makeup had been redone in a thicker style more appropriate to bright stage lighting. “Hey gals, did you hear the ‘blonde’s cheer’?” She went into a mock cheer, calling out…

“I’m a blonde,
“I’m a blonde,
“B, L O, uh, never mind,
“I’m a blonde,
“I’m a blonde.
“Yeah.”

She jumped up and down clapping her hands as she completed the cheer. The others stood there with their mouths agape.

“I’m sorry, did I do something wrong? This wasn’t what Kat laid out but it looked so right, I just had to try it. Then once I was in it, I just couldn’t resist that stupid cheer.” Tommi was waiting worriedly for a response. Kat gave Maggie a questioning glance and she responded with an almost imperceptible shake of the head.

“No. You just surprised us, Tommi. The outfit is a perfect fit and looks darling on you,” Barbie recovered and spoke first. “And as one of the non blonde minority here,” everyone looked at Karen, the only other non blonde in the room, who was smiling broadly, “I applaud the sentiment of your cheer.”

“Come. Grab a seat.” Karen waved her over and patted the couch beside her. “We were just talking about money–and you just gave me a really evil idea.”


 

End -- Chapter 6 of 23

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Comments

Um, WHAT???

Someone is seriously messed up in the head, and that's not me. So, I reckon it is a yet another of your telltale chapter end twists?

So, either Maggie actually made a bimboisation, or Katrina used the original compound in her pistol, or Tommi was conditioned even before the time and those conditionings messed up, or Tommi got around herself, overheard the fact of her non-bimboisation and decided to mess with everyone's heads. So many explanations, so little clues!

Faraway

Faraway


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Hummm...

Let's see...

1. Tommi has just had a somewhat significant change forced upon her.
2. The change is from a large, strong, male football player to a smaller, weaker, female, which is a significant difference in perspective if nothing else.
3. She's been rejected by her father (remember, he's the one that ordered their imprisonment).
4. She's gone from being a domineering, controling manager to a person on the run and living at the sufferance of others.
5. She has been told that there will be mental as well as physical changes that will lower her IQ. It's also been implied that his libido will change (remember, he implied it of the formula HE had modified), which can be fairly significant when one is faced with being an "innie vs. an outie" for sexual purposes. (Sorry, couldn't resist the use of that phrase).
6. It would seem that Tommy's opinion of females is less than good if he at all believes the myth behind his jokes.
7. Plus, there's stuff we stil don't know about Tom and his relationship with he father.

All in all, a good senario for mental strain at sufficient levels that even the best of us might have troubles adjusting. In such as situation, one might make some interesting choices as to what to believe and how one should act.

Yet another author's non-answer answer; almost as clear as the story itself. Right?

Hey, I have missed an option!

We know were told that Tom and Katrina were injected with original Kat's DNA, but how can we be so sure they were NOT injected with another DNA strain, like Bimbo Kat, for instance? You know, just to be sure it works ::evil grin::

Faraway

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Well..

At last, this one I can answer--I think.

Both have gone through the physical change process and only Tommi seems to be having mental issues--mental issues that an almost professional has diagnosed and is treating. Maggie is a Ph.D. candidate and I guess never quite say it, but she's supposed to be near to graduating, which means she almost has to be ABD (All But Dissertation) and should have some reasonable undestanding of what's happening to Tommi. You also have some reason to trust her judgment as she is at least considering the ethical issues involved in treating Tommi in a story where ethics don't seem to be playing a big part--hopefully, I can end this last sentence with "yet."

Well, it's true, but...

“Because they’ve had us for more than just the one week we’ve been awake. Considering how drastic your transition has been, we have to have been here almost four months. If we don’t get out of here within the next couple of weeks, we’ll probably be too dumb to plan our way out of a paper bag. So let me help you up and over to the bed where we can lie down together and talk with a modicum of privacy.”
--------------------
“Thanks to the formula you created and injected us with, within a month or so the intellectual and hormonal modifications will kick in and we’ll both be vacuous imbeciles with just one prime motivating thought—sex.”

These are from Chapter 3, and they imply that modifications to mind processes beyond natural for body are not gradual but have a point of activation. So the redundant injection could still be possible. However, if you say it is most likely not dependant on that, I will treat as a Word of God.

Faraway

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Ah, but...

...this is from chapter five as Kat explains to Maggie what's going on...

“To add another besides, I did kind of get even with her already. Remember what I told you that I told Tommi about the modified DNA we received. I lied to her. I did have time to analyze the samples and I knew what he was planning. I changed them so we both got temporary versions of my DNA. I figured that was safer than guessing which injector had the inhibitor and having it be a crap shoot as to whether anything happened to her. She’s not really becoming the air-headed, hormonally driven, sex object she thinks she’s becoming.

 
I told you I was trying to be devious. Mwah, ha, ha, ha, ha (or some similar approximation of a mad scientist's laugh).

I do remember that

But I think the point is missed. While I will not argue about the quote you presented, my point was that:

IF, after finding Tommi and Katrina in double KO, their colleagues injected them both with Bimbo Kat DNA, then the results would NOT be apparent for some time in the future. Thus, while Kat may think she has time to plan and plot, she, in fact, is nearing the point of bimboisation without realising it.

My point is a possibility of a control shot, like those made in gangster movies to ensure the dead-ness of the person.

Faraway

Faraway


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Where you can fool around like you want to and most you get is some bemused good ribbing!

As a guess

This is Tommie's own old prejudices working against her. Not only did the male ex-football jock have a poor opinion of women, but a really bad one about attractive blonds. Now that applies to her and after that melt down she is following the only guidelines she has left to her. Actually this is believable that Tommie would go catatonic all considered. This is one instance that the hypnosis gig is being used to help rather than harm given Tommie's condition.

grover

About hypnosis...

I actually do a demonstration of hypnosis for my Intro. to Psychology students. It's fun for me and a great way to show what it can and cannot do. Here, I've taken the usual literary license and suggested that it really would work as described since it's nice, as you pointed out, to portray hypnosis in a positive light once in a while. Unfortunately, the only way it would really work would be if Tommi were also taught self-hypnosis and reinforced all the messages it is assumed Maggie gave her OR Maggie redoes the hypnosis every day.

An Uphill Battle

For the team. Until the old Tom returns, Bimbo Blond is here, it seems.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Just a question, but..

...regardless of how the story turns out, do you really want the old Tom or a smart Tommi back?

liked the ending

Tommi appears to want to be a Dumb blond. Should get interesting from here. Keep us entertained.

Hugs,
Trish-Ann

Hugs,
Trish Ann
~There is no reality, only perception~

Thanks.

And also thanks to you and all the others who have commented. It helps me to work through your comments as I try to make certain I've dealt with all the (I hope) loose ends.

Question Jaye

You said Katrina made sure they were injected with temporary versions of her own DNA. So she did not change while Tommie did? If she didn't change wouldn't the boys observing them notice? On the other hand if she did change why did her sister not question the changes in her? Sorry, just getting a little confused about what formula was in what syringe.

hugs!

grover

Answer (I Hope)

Katrina told Tom/Tommi she'd injected him (and he injected her) with the "bimbo" formula. Either way, the changes would be physical for Tom/Tommi, but Kat was the basis for both formulas. Thus, only mental processes should have been impacted for Kat. She later confessed to her sister, Maggie, that she'd lied to Tom/Tommi and injected him with a duplicate of her own DNA. At least that's what's supposed to have happened so far.

As to the word "temporary," that was a mistake, which I'll fix. I can't say what I was thinking, but we both know that there's no such think as temporary DNA and even when a character who appears to be an expert says it exists, that just makes the character stupid, which definitely was NOT my intention. My apologies for the mistake and thank you for catching it. It helps me make it a better tale.