Wuthering Dormice (aka Bike) Part 903 by Angharad Copyright © 2010 Angharad All Rights Reserved.

“D’you think I made my dad fall down the stairs?”

Julie and I were talking in the kitchen before she had her drinking chocolate and went up to bed. I had impressed her that I needed to sleep alone in my own bed tonight–so I wanted no more of the Goldilocks syndrome from her.

“Why, did you push him?”

“No, but I wished it on him.”

“If that was the case, most of us would be dead or injured before we left our prams.”

“But I did.”

“My mum used to say, ‘If wishes were horses, then beggars would ride.’ I’m inclined to agree with her. Wishing something doesn’t make it happen, and whilst you despised your dad, I don’t think you ever stopped loving him, did you?”

She looked at the floor, “He’s my dad.” She began to cry and I had to hug her to stop. “You said I was as bad as him if I wanted him to be hurt. I’m obviously as bad as him, and I deserve to be hurt as well.”

“Bend over,” I commanded releasing her from my hug.

“What?” she gasped.

“Bend over.” She did more out of surprise than anything, and I slapped her quite hard on the bottom.

“Ouch,” she yelled stepping forward and banging her head on the table.

“Oops, that wasn’t supposed to happen,” I said blushing and kissed her on the head where she’d bumped it.

“What was that for?”

“I was kissing it better.”

“No–the smack on my bottom?”

“You said you deserved to be hurt, I was simply obliging you. Now you’re quits with your dad.”

She rubbed her head, “That hurt more than your smack,” she grumbled and sniggered, “I’m a bit old to get my bum smacked.”

“Not in this house, Gramps has threatened to smack mine more than once.”

“But you’re a grown woman?”

“So, he sees me as his daughter–like a little girl.”

“He didn’t know you as a little girl, did he?”

“No, but he knew his own daughter and projects that onto me.”

“When did she transition–was she young?”

“As a teenager, I think.”

“What about you, Mummy, when did you?”

“I was twenty or twenty one–I think. I’d not long graduated from Sussex and had managed to talk my way into a research position here with Gramps.”

“I’d like to go to university–I’d be the first in my old family to do so.”

“It’s not all it’s cracked out to be, but if you want to go and you get accepted, we’ll help you all we can.”

“Thank you, Mummy,” she hugged me again, “I love you, Mummy.”

“I don’t think you know me well enough to say that, but I’ll accept it as a compliment all the same.”

“I do, Mummy–you’re the kindest, nicest...”

“Richest?” I offered.

“No–yes–oh, Mummy, you’ve spoilt it now, you horrible, Mummy.” She playfully slapped my arm. “How can I tell you how much I love you if you laugh at me? S’not fair.”

“Oh, Julie, what am I going to do with you?”

“Hug me please.”

I opened my arms and she hugged me so tight it felt like I would be flat chested if she continued. I managed to ease her off a little, and hugged her again–gently.

“I’m proud of the way you stood your ground with your parents today.” I rubbed her back as I spoke.

“Thank you, Mummy,” she hugged me boob squashingly tight again–“I could only do it because I knew you were supporting me, and so was Auntie Stella, ‘n’ everyone here.” She began to cry again, and I cooed to her and continued rubbing her back. “I’ve never been so frightened in my life.”

“What of Stella?” I joked, “She can be a bit fearsome.”

“Silly, Mummy–no, of my old parents–I mean, they’d been so cross with me before an’ what if ’e’d had another ’eart attack? That woulda been my fault.”

“I think it’s more likely to be due to his clogged up arteries.”

“They said his arteries weren’t furred up.”

“Ah–I might have had something to do with that,” I blushed. I’m going to have to have a serious talk with this energy stuff–it makes people healthier than before their crisis event.

“He’s gonna be on a different ward tomorrow.”

“I see.”

“Did you fix his arteries?”

“Not directly–but yes, I guess I did.”

“Mum was all of a twitter, she couldn’t understand why the ’eart bloke...”

“The cardiologist,” I suggested.

“Yeah, him as well, they couldn’t find anything wrong with his heart and his tests were all different to last night.”

“Okay, so I do a good job.”

“Good job–you’re, like, absolutely brill, Mummy. Instead of going to a funeral, I like got to see my dad while he was still alive.”

“I wish, I could have done that with my mother.”

“Oh–did she die?”

“I’d just transitioned a matter of weeks, and she died. I got to see her before she died as I am now, and she didn’t really recognise me or Stella. She died while I was with her–called me an angel–she was delirious.”

“No–she was right–you are an angel, you’re far too nice to be an ordinary person.”

“Julie, if ever I find those rose tinted specs of yours, I’m going to confiscate them until you see me as I really am–just an ordinary woman.”

“You’ll always be special to me an’ all the other kids you look after.”

“C’mon, make your chocolate and up to bed. I’m not looking forward to seeing your parents again.”

“But you will come–won’t you?”

“I said I would–I try to keep my word.”

“Thanks, Mummy.”

She had her drink and went off to bed, I made some cocoa for Tom, and tea for Stella and I. We chatted about Stella’s perceptions of the hospital visit.

“So they don’t think anything metaphysical happened?” I asked.

“Nah, I baffled ‘em with pseudoscience, and Julie was nodding at everything I said.”

“I’m just worried that if they knew I was the demon healer, they could make life awkward for all of us.”

“They were more focused on their daughter,” Stella made those irritating inverted comma signs with her fingers.

“An’ hoo did that go?” asked Tom.

“Yeah, as well as could be expected–her mother kept staring at her, trying to spot faults, but apart from saying, that, ‘She wouldn’t have let her dress like that,’ it went okay. Her dad said very little, mind you he looked washed out.

“Let’s face it, he was practically dead when I saw him.” I sipped my tea–I wondered if he’d had a change of heart, from my ministrations and his near death experience. I knew if he changed his attitude, so would mother. It was still a long shot.

“Well, I dinna ken aboot ye twa, but I’m awa’ tae ma pit.” Tom excused himself and kissed both of us on the cheek before he left.

“D’you think Julie will ever get back with her parents?” asked Stella.

“I don’t know–if she does, she may have to ultimately give up her desire to be female.”

“What even if they accept her?”

“I don’t think they ever really will–they’ll just tolerate her.”

“Isn’t that more or less the same?”

“No, it means that she would feel unwelcome in her new gender and would be under unconscious pressure to change back.”

“What after all she’s gone through with them?”

“Essentially yes–I don’t mean it unkindly, but I don’t think they have the capacity to make such a sea-change. They’re rooted by their ignorance.”

“What even after your blue light special?”

“Even then–I don’t have the capacity to change people or how they feel about things–and besides, what I do isn’t what Julie is. They don’t know me, other than the person who took their child and changed him against their will, and apparently as some nutty scientist who may or may not have saved his life.”

“Oh, I see what you mean. I had hoped she could make her peace with them.”

“I think she can do that, but they’re a long way from acceptance.”

“But your dad eventually came round, didn’t he?”

“I don’t know, he made out he did and he certainly acted it quite well–but in his heart of hearts–I don’t honestly know.”