Choices (part 3)

(from part 2)

Finally, I got out of my dress, and slipped into one of my new nightgowns, and went to bed. I slept fitfully. I had no clue then that this nightmare had just begun, and soon my fellow students would have their turn facing this horror. The worst was yet to come…..

(part 3)

I got up early, so I could take my time getting ready. It was more than just the fact that it was more complicated than getting ready as a guy was. I had already known why it takes girls longer to get ready than boys. But it was a combination of joy and reluctance, and a desire to somehow make me so passable that I would go back to being invisible again.

I had been the target yesterday of special attention, some good, some bad, and I desperately wanted that to end. If I had to now be a girl, I wanted to be just a girl, and not someone who needed adult protection just to take classes.

Mom decided to drive me to school. When we arrived, Linda was there, and so was Miss Anderson. She looked shaky to me, so I whispered to Mom, “Miss Anderson looks like she could use a friend. Since I am a kid, maybe you can help her. I want to talk to Linda.”

“Good idea hon.”

She moved away to talk privately with Miss Anderson, and I came over to see Linda. She took me by both hands, twirled me around, and said, “You look lovely David.”

“Call me Alice, Linda. It’s going to be my name from now on.”

“Well, you look lovely, Alice.”

“The girls at the salon did miracles with me.”

“Girl, take a compliment when it’s given. You are beautiful. In fact I wouldn’t be surprised if Blake flirts with you today in Drama class.”

That was a bit of a joke, because Blake was known as an incorrigible flirt. He always lost whatever girlfriend he had at the moment because he couldn’t seem to stop himself from chatting up every attractive girl he saw.

The interesting thing was the ex-girlfriends didn’t seem to blame him. They seemed to regard dating him as like riding a rollercoaster. They got off breathless and dizzy, having enjoyed the ride, but knowing even at the beginning of the ride that it would have to end eventually.

Just then the vice-principal came in. He looked like he hadn’t slept the night before. He came over to my mom, and after a whispered conversation, he called in the staff. Linda and I watched them talk for a minute, and then he said to me “All right. Your mother says you have chosen the name ‘Alice’. Fine. that’s…fine. I have asked the staff to respect that. Do you want an escort to classes today?”

“No. I was thinking about that this morning. It only makes things worse by making me stand out even more. I.. I want to be treated like any other girl.”

He looked worried, but said “As you wish. But I have told the teachers to tell your classmates that any harassment or violence will not be tolerated. And I want you to come to me immediately if anything happens.”

I looked at him hard, and asked, “What happened, sir?”

He looked at the floor, and then said, “Let’s just say… I have been charged with making sure you are protected. And I would be held personally responsible for anything that happened to you.”

“I … I am sorry. This … this isn’t the what I wanted. I… I may have always really been a girl, and it might be better that I lived like one, but I never wanted anyone to get hurt.”

He looked pained, and said “Please don’t blame yourself. This thing… this creature is the one responsible.”

“Come on” Linda said, and took my hand.

My first class that day was Social Studies, and the teacher read the riot act prepared by the vice-principal. The teacher called me “Alice”, and other than a couple of people who pretended like I didn’t exist, the rest of the class followed suit.

The second class was Drama, and we were to split into groups of two. As we had an uneven number of people, I fully expected to be left out. But Blake asked me to be his partner, and invited Linda to join us.

He picked the first meeting of Romeo and Juliet as our piece, and ran it through with Linda, while I watched. Then he dragged me forward and had me take her place. I blushed the whole time we worked together, and then while we watched the others perform, he pretty much continued in the same vein.

He gently flirted, careful to keep it light enough that if I felt offended he could claim to being only friendly. I felt lost in this dance, not knowing what my steps were supposed to be. Eventually, Linda stepped in and rescued me, allowing me to catch my breath.

“Did I call it or did I call it?” she giggled.

“I guess he really will chase anyone in a skirt.”

“Don’t sell yourself so short. He has good taste when it comes to girls.”

“Maybe. But I … I don’t think I want to be one of his conquests.”

“Real-ly. Does that mean you would rather date girls?”

I blushed. “ I … I think so. I am so confused right now I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to even think that far ahead.”

“Okay hon. I know things are not settled right now. Plus we still haven’t solved what’s going on here anyway.”

“Well, I hope that this creature is satisfied with my transformation, and that the scariness is over with.”

We had no idea how wrong I was. But we were about to find out.

I had a free period next, so decided to head to my favorite hidey-hole, the library. On my way there, however, I heard a commotion, and curious, I headed toward it.

It turned out to be coming from the Gym. A number of the “jocks” were gathered around the entrance to the boy’s change room. I asked one of them what was going on, and he said, “Two boys are in there… having sex … with each other.”

A really bad feeling came over me.

“Who are they?”

“Richard and Alan.”

My bad feeling got worse. They had been two of my worst tormentors, seemingly dedicated to the task of removing “the fag” from the school by any means necessary.

After several minutes the gym teacher came out, and shooed all the onlookers away, and went back in.

I waited, and he took both boys out. They were in their underwear, and had dazed looks on their faces, and it was very clear what they had been doing with each other. Unnoticed, I snuck behind them as he hustled the boys to the nurse’s office.

I listened in for a few minutes, long enough to hear both boys say in no uncertain terms that they had not been in control of their actions. A few moments later one of the boys was clearly crying, I left, and went to my next class.

At lunch, I caught up to Linda, and told her what had happened. She looked thoughtful, and saw the expression on my face, and said, “I can tell you are still blaming yourself”

“Hard not to. I mean, those boys, they were awful to me. If I wanted to have some revenge, I am sure I would have started with them.”

“But revenge just isn’t part of your makeup Alice.”

“But maybe somebody has decided to take revenge on my behalf.”

“In which case, that is their decision, and you are not at fault.”

“How did you get so smart?”

“I learned lessons the hard way, the way most people have to.”

“At least you learned.”

After lunch, I went to my next class. Things went smoothly until just before the bell rang. Suddenly, I felt myself get up, and move to the door. It was a strange experience. It was like I was two people. One simply obeyed the commands it was getting, the other part, my real self, struggled against the control, but without success.

I realized I wasn’t alone students came out of every classroom, and we headed for the gym again. Once there, we saw a girl I knew well. Her name was Carol Bell, and she was not a friend of mine.

In fact, she was responsible for starting a rumor that I had danced with a boy at a school dance. I started to get that bad feeling again…

I have debated with myself whether to write down what happened to that girl, and finally decided against it. No one who reads this needs to have the nightmares….

The worst part for me was my own helplessness. I felt pinned to my seat, and couldn’t save her the way I had saved Miss Anderson. The other worst part was hearing the giggles forced out of the girl while she degraded herself in front of us….

After it was over, the force holding us let us go, and the students mostly fled. A few got ill, and one or two looked like they had passed out….

Linda went over to check on Carol, who was now curled up in a small ball. A teacher came over, and together we took her to the nurse’s office.

After they got her settled, Linda turned back to me, and saw that I was shaking and fighting back tears.

“Alice, do you remember the first time we met?”

“You hijacked me because you decided you wanted company to go across the street.”

“Yes. Do you know why I picked you?”

“N..no.”

“Because even at the first meeting, I could sense the goodness in you. I may not have seen the girl you really are, but I could see a gentleness, a desire to do the right thing. I cannot and will not believe this is your fault.”

I got control of myself, and said, “I … understand what you are saying. But I have to find a way to stop this. I cannot let any one else get hurt.”

“Then I am going to help you.”

“This thing could go after you too”

“You are not facing this alone. Just accept that I am coming with you.”

“Th…thank you.”

“Now, do you have any idea where to start?”

“If this is connected with Alex, we need to go to the house he lived in.”

“What a way to spend Halloween. Looking for a ghost.”

“Up to you, you can sit this out, I wont think the less of you.”

“Not on your life. Tonight, we go ghost-busting.”