Part 42

After fixing my face, I give myself one last critical look to make sure I look ok. I want to make a good impression at this school.

Thinking that this is the best I'm going to be able to do, I grab my purse and head back downstairs to meet up with Mom.

Soon we're heading south on El Camino Real like we're heading to the club. This time I'm actually paying attention to my surroundings and sure enough there are all sorts of signs indicating that we're heading towards Stanford.

As I watch another sign go by, I say "Mom, you have to promise that you won't tell anyone that I didn’t know Stanford was here. God this is so embarrassing. How could I have missed it? Look at the size of that sign. You let the school know and they'll want to put me back in kindergarten."

Chuckling at me, Mom says "I won't tell honey and give yourself some slack, when you don't drive, you don’t tend to notice things and you have been distracted by one or two things since our move out here."

"Ok, if this ever gets out, that's my story and I'll stick with it. No one will believe me but . . . "

We turn off El Camino and sure enough, a few minutes later there's the stadium on the left. Just past that we turn right and then right again up this long drive to what looks like southern mansion with a bunch of low buildings behind it. There's a sign at the beginning of the drive that directs people to Harrison Academy for Girls to the left and to the Davidson Country Day school to the right.

We turn left and park the car out front. Taking a deep breath, I get out of the car and join Mom.

We go up the steps and inside to the reception area. There's a girl at the desk that can't be much older than me.

"Hello, welcome to Harrison Academy for Girls, May I help you?"

Mom replies, "Yes, we're here to see Ms. Cavanaugh. I'm Sharon Conners and this is Alex."

"One moment please." She then gets on the phone and calls someone and tells them we're here. After hanging up, she says to Mom, "Mrs. Cavanaugh will be right out. May I get you anything to drink?"

"No thank you, we're fine."

The girl looks over at me and smiles and I smile back. Just then a lady a little bit older than Mom comes out and says, "Sharon Conners, I'm Emily Cavanaugh." She sounds a bit like Kate Winslet.

""It's very nice to meet you." And they shake hands.

Ms. Cavanaugh immediately turns to me and says, "And this must be Alexandra. It's a pleasure to meet you."

I shake her hand and say "It's very nice to meet you too ma'am."

"Please, let's go into my office."

Once there we're asked to sit and Ms. Cavanaugh goes behind her desk. It's a neat desk but stacked high with papers.

"Please excuse the mess, the students and the teachers get time off during the summer but I'm afraid that the administration staff doesn't. At least I don't." Smiling at us she pulls out a file and opens it up. "Mrs. Conners as I mentioned when we last spoke, we're very impressed by Alexandra's academic scores and believe that we can round out her book learning with what home schooled children tend to miss out on, namely the social and practical interactions they need to succeed in the world."

"Please call me Sharon, and I hope Alex here will have that chance."

"Thank you Sharon, please call me Emily," turning to me, Ms Cavanaugh asks, "So Alexandra, tell me why you want to come to our school."

"If you would ma'am, it's Alex. When you say Alexandra I think you must be talking to someone else. As to why I want to come to your school? Well I don't know quite frankly. I mean I've read about the school from your web site and it looks real nice, but other than that I don't know anything about it. What I do know is I've never been in a school environment before and that's something I should experience. I, I'm rather shy. It's difficult for me in social settings, school will help me there, at least I hope so. Also I haven't had any practical labs for the academic side and I need that. My Mom seems to think this is a good school and I trust her judgment."

"Not a bad answer. At least you're honest and I like that. Let me tell you a bit about our little home, and I do mean home. You see me and my entire staff feel like this is an extended family and all the girls here are in way our children. We're here to not only teach you on the academic side, but to help you grow as a young lady and as a young adult.

We want to ensure that when you finally leave here, you're fully capable of facing the big bad world and not only survive, but to take it on and succeed. Hopefully we succeed in that.

The majority of the classes you'll be taking will be just with the other girls, but I'm sure you noticed the sign out front for Davidson Country Day, the boys' school. We share some facilities with them and do have some mixed classes but again the majority of classes will be segregated. Additionally our schools have an arrangement with Stanford to utilize some of their facilities and some of the advanced classes are held at Stanford, and for those you'll not only receive scholastic credit with us, but with Stanford as well. Looking at your transcript, it appears that you'll have several of those."

She continued to describe the school and some of what would be expected of me and eventually she asked, "Well young Alex, think you'd like to give us a try?"

"Oh, um yes ma'am that is if it's ok with my folks."

Mom says, "I think you'd do nicely here honey."

"Great. Tell you what, why don't I have Chelsea, you met her out front, show you around a bit while your mother and I finish up the paperwork?"

Mrs. Cavanaugh calls in Chelsea and we start my tour.

Chelsea seems like a very nice girl. We go outside and head over to the main classroom buildings.

"Now our classrooms are all over here and if you look down the hill there, those are the classrooms for the boys. In between are the art, music and drama rooms, as well as the library and some of the common areas. The art, music and drama classes are the classes that are mixed. All of the language, math and science classes are kept separate. Oh and there are a couple mixed phys. ed. classes like fencing or tennis or archery, but the rest are separate.

It's kinda nice to have the mix this way, I think so at least. So what school are you from?"

"I'm not. I've been home schooled up to now. My folks want me in a school now so I don't become a complete hermit or something."

She laughs at that. "Well it'll be hard to be a hermit here. We're always doing some event, like plays or concerts. We have dances too and there are a ton of afterschool clubs and such. So do you have a boyfriend?"

"Oh, no, no I don't."

"Well I suspect you'll have a bunch of the boys chasing after you then. They're all basically harmless, just don't show fear, don't turn your back on them and never ever stick your fingers through the bars of the cages. Follow those three rules and you won't have too much trouble with them."

At this we both start to laugh. Chelsea is a funny girl.

"So what grade will you be starting in?"

"I'm not really sure, I think that's one of the things my Mom is discussing with Mrs. Cavanaugh. I think I'm going to be a Junior but maybe a Senior."

"Well I hope it's as a Junior. If so we'll have some classes together I'm sure. That's what I'll be. Maybe we could be friends."

"I'd like that, no matter what grade I'm in."

At that we both smile at each other.

"So Chelsea, do you have a boyfriend?"

"Me? Lord no. They're all scared off."

"Scared off, why?"

"I have two theories about that; the first is because of my natural superiority by virtue of just being a girl."

This gets me giggling.

"And your second theory?"

"They're scared of my mum."

"Who's your mom?"

"You met her."

"Mrs. Cavanaugh is your mom?"

"Yup, that's my mum."

"Hmm, she didn't seem all that scary to me."

"You're not a boy."

Under my breath I say, "Not anymore, that's for sure."

"What was that?"

"Oh, I said that's for sure."

* * *

When we get back to the reception area Mom and Mrs. Cavanaugh are there waiting for us.

Mom says, "Well what did you think of the campus?"

"It's real nice Mom."

Mrs. Cavanaugh says, "Well I'm glad you like it. Come August you'll be starting here as a Junior. Welcome to our little family Alex."

"Oh brilliant," says Chelsea, "Mum, can I be her orientation buddy?"

At our looks Mrs. Cavanaugh says, "Each new student is paired up with one of our other students so they'll have someone to help them out. Since you two have already met, unless Alex has an objection, I don't see why you can't be."

At everyone's look I say "That sounds great to me."

Chelsea and I smile at each other.

"Well then Alex, we'll see you on orientation night just before school starts. You mother has your packet, make sure you read it. You'll need to know the dress code and code of conduct and there's a lot of other information in there that you'll need to be familiar with as well. Take care and we'll see you then, goodbye."

"Goodbye Mrs. Cavanaugh, bye Chelsea."

"See you Alex."

We finish up our goodbyes and get into the car to head back home.

Once we're back on the road, Mom asks, "So you liked it?"

"It seems nice."

"It's not even the first day of school and it looks like you made a new friend."

"Yea, maybe. I hope so at least. Chelsea seems real nice."

"I think you'll do fine there honey, I really do. Now when we get home, let's go over the packet for your school. One of the things we need to do is pick your classes and get that submitted to the school."

"Ok Mom. Mom, I've been thinking. I've been trying to figure out what I'm going to do with my life."

"And?"

"I've never really had a drive for any one thing really. I mean everyone I know has always pretty much known what they're going to be, but not me. I've been trying to figure it out and I think I've narrowed it down to one of two things."

"What's that honey?"

"Well the first thing is art. You know I've always enjoyed that and I'm actually not too bad. The down side is it's a good way to starve. So I figure to just keep that as my hobby. The other thing that I'm good at and that I enjoy is languages. I know five now. I've never had too much trouble learning them so I figure I can pick up more. The only thing is, what would I do with that? The only thing I can think of would be to be a translator or a teacher. Quite frankly neither one really appeals to me all that much."

"Have you looked at other possibilities?"

"Like what? I've been racking my brain and those are really the only two things I'm any good at. Well there's Parkour and diving but you can't make a living with Parkour and although I'm pretty good at diving, I'm not that good. This is all very frustrating."

"Well you still have time before you need to decide on anything but I was thinking of this commercial you're going to do or even doing modeling."

"I don't know Mom. We don't even know if I'll be any good on this commercial and I don't know if I'll even like doing it. As to modeling, well I don't know."

"Think about it. There are an awful lot of people who think you'd be very good. Also do me this favor, when we get home I want you to sit down and look at your portfolio, I mean really look at. Those are some fantastic photos of you. Afterwards, you tell me that those aren't every bit as good or better as what you'd find in a fashion magazine. Now it might not be something that you'll like, but then again it might. You'll never know until you try. You could always start out small. Do some modeling for your sister, see if you like it. I know she'd be thrilled."

"Hmm, I'll think about it. Thanks Mom."

* * *

"Hey Amanda."

"Hello Alex, come on in and have a seat. You're looking particularly vibrant today."

"Thanks, Mom and I went to our killer aerobics class this morning and although it wipes me out right after, once I get my wind back I feel great for the rest of the day."

"Hmm, maybe I should do that. I'm afraid that sitting behind this desk all day isn't helping my figure any. So what brings you in today?"

"Several things, yesterday Mom and I checked out my new school. I'm still real nervous about going to a school, but this one seems kinda nice. A lot better than the high school near my house seems at least."

"That's good, but that's not it is it?"

"No, it isn't. There are actually two things. First, Robbyn's folks will be coming out here for the Fourth of July."

"Oh."

"Yea, my time with Robbyn is numbered. Oh, Amanda! What am I going to do?"

The next half hour is spent bawling my eyes out and working through things with Amanda.

". . . . so I want you to make the time Alex. You need to fully talk things over with Robbyn and not hold anything back. I'm sure she just hasn't realized yet just what her parents coming out here means for your relationship, but she will and she will real soon too. If you really want this relationship to continue as it has, or even to survive at all, you need to communicate and not hold anything back when you do. Sound good?"

"Yea, I guess I knew all that, I just needed you to point out the obvious to me is all."

"Hey, that's my job. Now you said there were two things. What's the other?"

"Oh yea, that. Well, I'm a girl."

"I thought we'd already covered this."

"We had, it's just I've had some more self-revelations."

"Ok, go on."

"Yesterday I was talking to Mom about what I'm going to do with my life. I had only been able to come up with two things that I thought I could earn a living at and that I enjoyed; art and languages. Mom suggested that I also think about doing commercials or modeling.

I hadn't even thought of those but Mom wanted me to sit down with the portfolio I had done and to really look at my pictures and be as objective as I could and see if this was something I could at least look at more.

Well I did and I just couldn’t' see it. I couldn't see past me if you know what I mean. So I ended up getting post it notes and covering my head on all the shots. This really helped. Without seeing my face, I can honestly say that any of those pictures could be of any model in a magazine.

This kinda shocked me you know? I don't know how to say this without sounding egotistical or something and I really don't mean it that way, but after going over my portfolio, I grabbed a towel and covered up the top part of my mirror so when I looked at myself, I again wouldn't see my face. I stripped down to my underwear and really just looked at myself."

"What did you see?"

"This is where the words kinda fail me, where I'm afraid that I may sound like I have a swelled head or something and I really don't mean it that way. Amanda, I looked, no I look hot. I've got a great body and, and I, oh how do I say this? I like it. Ugh that's kinda it but not quite.

Ok, take today for instance. Now Robbyn has always, and for that matter Ellen has too, they've wanted me to dress in a way that quite frankly made me nervous. I always thought that it was too revealing, that dressing that way would send the wrong message or something, besides, I guess I've always felt that was how girls dressed and I guess I've never really deep down seen myself as a girl.

Now Robbyn is always saying that dressing the way she and Ellen suggests it isn't about others, it's about being a girl, reveling in my femininity, appreciating my body and all of the hard work I've done to look like this. Robbyn says that it isn't about sending a message in a sexual or flirtatious way, the message is supposed to be 'hey, I'm a girl and proud of it.' And it doesn't matter if anyone but me hears that message.

Well I never got that until today. Mom and I were done with our class and Mom had gone off to speak briefly with one of her clients when I noticed that I was turning some heads and the reason was because I look good and feel good. That the message I was sending out was 'I'm a girl everyone and damn proud of it.' Well maybe not quite that but close to it. Getting appreciative looks, well they didn't creep me out this time, well some do, there's a difference between looks and leers, anyway the point is they didn't for the most part bother me.

Standing in my room and looking at myself in the mirror, I was finally able to admit that not only am I a girl, but also appreciate that I'm not half bad looking either."

Smiling Amanda says, "Tell Robbyn she's poaching on my turf. Ok, you're a girl. What does that mean for you?"

"Well, I'm not really sure over all, I'm still working through all of that, but I do think it means that maybe I can do something like commercials or modeling after all. I, I think that maybe I'm pretty enough to do it. I still have to get over the whole 'eeek people!' thing, but I really think that maybe I am pretty, at least enough to give it a try."

I spend the rest of my hour with Amanda discussing my latest self-revelation. At the end I'm feeling pretty good.

". . . . and no more panic attacks?"

"Nope. Of course I haven't been out shopping since either."

"True, but you have been in situations that could have easily triggered one. You're making remarkable progress Alex.

I think we can just meet once a month and if you need to see me between appointments then we can arrange one. That sound good to you?"

"I think so, no I know so. That will be fine."

Smiling Amanda says, "I wish all my patents progressed as fast and as well as you have. Just make sure to call me if you need me. Anytime, day or night. If you back slide, don't worry about it, most people do at one point or another, sometimes several times. Ok?"

"I will Amanda, I promise."

After saying goodbye to Amanda and scheduling my next appointment, I go outside to wait for Mom.

* * *

"Hey sweetheart." Says Mom as I jump in the car. "How was your appointment?"

"It went well. Part of what we talked about was Robbyn going back home. Amanda said that I really need to sit down with Robbyn and the two of us have a heart to heart talk. That we need to really talk about us and all. I thought that since Ellen is going out on her date tomorrow night and you and Dad have that party you're going to, tomorrow night will be the best time to do this."

"Well don't put anything in stone just yet. PJ called and said that Nike wants to meet with you tomorrow. If they're going to do this, they really want to see if they can't get the commercial aired by July fourth."

"Wow, isn't that pretty rushed?"

"I thought so and when I asked PJ, she said it's a very aggressive schedule. I told her to go ahead and set up the meeting. She had just called back and said that we'll meet with them at eleven-thirty tomorrow morning. That means that we'll have an early flight. We should be done in plenty of time to get back by evening but we're going to have to play it by ear."

"Well, I hope they like me."

"I'm sure they will honey or they wouldn't be going through all this trouble. So are you feeling better about doing this?"

"Yea, that's some of what Amanda and I were talking about too. You were right, this may be an option for me but I'll never know unless I try. Even if I completely bomb in this, the experience will be fun."

"That's the spirit honey. Why don't we stop at the house, grab Robbyn and your sister and go to the mall? Maybe we can find you something new for your interview."

A big smile is my answer. It seems like I've been fully infected by the shopping bug. I may not be in Mom, Ellen's or Robbyn's league but they've also had more practice and time than me too.

As we pull into the driveway, Mom says, "We'll need to hurry a bit so we can get back in time to fix dinner."

"Ok, how about you tell Ellen and I'll tell Robbyn then we'll all meet back at the kitchen?"

"Sounds like a plan."

When Mom pulls to a stop, I hop out and rush on inside. I immediately see Robbyn out by the pool and head out there.

Giving her a wolf whistle, I say "Hey love, come on in and put some clothes on."

Looking at me from over the top of her sunglasses she responds, "I thought that you liked me in, what was that phrase you used? Oh yes, 'the less clothes the better.' Something like that at least."

"Well normally I do, but Mom is taking us over to the mall so I can get something for my interview with Nike."

"The mall!?" At that Robby hops up and passes me going inside. "Well why didn't you say so?"

Chuckling I turn and follow her in.

Just before we reach the stairs, Mom calls out, "Girls, slight change of plans. Your father is taking us out to dinner so put something nice on please."

"Ok Mom." I call out.

Up in our room I grab Robbyn and pull her to me. "I love you Robbyn Anderson." And with that I give her a big kiss.

"Wow, what was that for? Not that I'm complaining mind you."

"I'm feeling real good right now and I also never want you to forget how much I love you." I lean in and give her another kiss.

"I love you too Alex. Very much."

Smiling at her I say, "We better change now before we get into trouble."

"Hmmm, ok. I like trouble though, at least your kind of trouble."

"Maybe tomorrow night if we get back."

As she takes off her bikini Robbyn asks, "Get back? From where?"

Giving her an appreciative glance I ask "Cold?"

Looking down, Robbyn blushes a bit and says, "No, now get back from where?"

"Oh, L.A. Nike wants to meet me tomorrow at eleven-thirty. That's why the sudden shopping trip. Mom and I will fly down then fly right back after the meeting. Ellen has a date tomorrow night and Mom and Dad have a party to go to. That means you and I will have this great big house all to ourselves. What ever shall we do?"

"Oh I'm sure we can find some old movie on the television or something."

"I vote for the 'or something'."

Giggling, Robbyn goes into the bathroom and says, "I'm just going to rinse off the lotion real quick, want to join me?"

"If I do the 'real quick' part of that last statement will go right out the window."

"Ok then, give me two minutes."

As Robbyn hops into the shower, I change my underwear and pull on my pink mini belt dress and white sandals with the two inch heels. I'm touching up my make up and brushing my hair as Robbyn comes out and begins to dress.

Standing I turn to her and ask, "What'cha think?"

Giving me a whistle, Robbyn says "that's cute, that's very cute. It's a bit more daring than what you usually wear though isn't it?"

"Yea, I'm trying to expand my horizons though. It isn't too short is it?"

"I think it's perfect."

Sighing with relief I keep Robbyn company as she dresses. Damn but I never get tired looking at her.

After she puts her makeup on and brushes out her hair, we go downstairs.

Ellen's already up and says, "What took you guys so long?"

Mom says, "don't start Ellen, you just walked up here yourself.”

And Dad says as he looks at me, "what are you wearing?"

"It's a dress."

"Who says? It looks like one of my polo shirts belted around your waist."

"Ralph Lauren and that's the way it's supposed to look."

"Bet he doesn't have a daughter."

Ellen says, "You'd lose Dad. His daughter's name is Dylan."

"Ok, ok, I give up. I won't say anything about how you dress unless your mother does first. I should have learned that with your sister. Just try not to put too much stress on my old heart, it can't take it."

I go over and give Dad a hug. "Thank you Daddy." I give him a kiss on the cheek as I pull away.

Dad's smiling at me and says, "Now I thought someone said something about spending money at the mall?"

"Darn tootin' Pops," says Ellen, "Let's not waist any more time. Come on."

With that, we all head out to the car.

* * *

Shopping is really turning out to be fun and I think Dad is even enjoying himself, although I don't think he'd ever admit it.

I end up getting an Alice and Olivia belted two-piece dress. The top part is a crisp white silk shirt with a form-fitting ruched knit skirt on the bottom. With the belt in place it really looks like two pieces. I also end up getting a lovely Ivory knit dress with three quarter sleeves by Yves Saint Laurent. It feels sinfully soft wearing it.

To round everything out Mom and Ellen decide that these very nice Jimmy Choo platform pumps are needed too. My only complaint is the height of the heel, they're about four, almost five inches. However, when I try them on they're super comfortable. Ellen says you get what you pay for, that there's no reason a five inch heel has to be uncomfortable. If she says so. For the price they aught to be comfortable.

I'm surprised that Dad is paying for everything without so much as a blink.

When my purchases are rung up it comes just over a thousand dollars.

"Thanks Dad." I say as he finishes paying. "You're the best."

"Anytime sweetheart, I'm sure you'll be able to pay this back out of your very first check."

At my stunned expression Dad starts to chuckle. "Not all of it, just what can fall under business expenses, like the dress and shoes you'll wear for your meeting.

I'll feed you and dress you, dress you very well with your sister and mother doing the shopping, but for expenses for your work, whatever your work is to be, I'll help but you need to take the main responsibility for that. If for no other reason, it will teach you the value of a dollar and how hard it is sometimes to get that dollar."

At this point I'm beginning to think that maybe the outfit I wore to Dad's work will be good enough and lord knows I don't need another pair of shoes, no matter how cute and comfortable they may be. I also probably don't really need these stockings but I might be able to get them with the knit dress that Dad will pay for, but probably not as the stockings are black and the knit dress is ivory.

As I'm standing there trying to figure all this out, Mom comes up.

"Hey honey, everything ok? You look worried."

I explain what Dad said and that I probably could get by without the new dress.

"Hmm, well honey, don't worry about it this time. Your father is right you will need to manage the expenses for any job you get. We did discuss that, however, it was my idea to go shopping and we should have talked to you about it first. How about we let this one slide, ok?"

"Mom, Dad is right. I really should pay for this. It's not fair to you guys."

"Oh honey, it's not like we can't afford it. Tell you what though, we wont worry about it for now. If the commercial is a successful as PJ seems to think it will be, you can pay us back then. Deal?"

"Ok, deal. Thanks Mom."