Off to Seek a Wizard -7- Just a Crazy Ghost?

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Off to Seek a Wizard...
-7-
Just a Crazy Ghost?

by Erin Halfelven

stephaniedale.png

 
Waking up is a surprising thing to do when you're convinced that you're dead.

I could hardly believe the sun shining in my face. I had fallen out of a plane, hadn't I? I should be dead, not stretched out on some grassy knoll somewhere. I lay there quietly watching fluffy clouds in a blue morning sky, trying to work out just what had happened.

I'd come back from the lavatory wearing flops that the flight attendant had given me. What was her name? I couldn't remember and just at that moment it seemed like the most important thing in the world. After a bit I gave up trying to remember it because the only thing I could think of was that it started with an S but my name starts with an S and so all I came up with was Stephanie and that wasn't right.

Back on the plane, I'd gotten to my seat, after almost rubbing my seat on George's face. How humiliating. Maybe I had ejected myself from the plane in sheer embarrassed funk. I tried harder to remember. I'd sat down and been reaching for the seat belt when there was a noise right above me. Before I could look up, something grabbed me and next thing I knew I was floating in mid air with no plane in sight. Floating? Falling? Flying?

I could hear birdsong. Birds could fly so why, oh why, couldn't I? It was one, possible (?), explanation but I had never known I could fly before. Was it something I could only do when scared to death? Lots of luck recreating the necessary conditions for that experiment.

I tried to relive the terror of falling through the storm cloud, of nearly freezing to death on a rare day in June, but I couldn't. My mind kept veering away into inanities. Like I could swear I heard the snuffling and snorting of my Aunt Daisy's pet pug dog, Lowheezie off in the distance.

I wanted to ignore it but all that happened is that I began wondering if I had maybe broken every bone in my body in my landing. I didn't hurt anywhere but that could be shock or a broken neck or -- I imagined all kinds of things. The fact that I could feel my toes wiggle, feel grass blades tickling my sides and a mild but insistent pressure in my bladder meant nothing of course.

I could be imagining all those things, I could be imagining I was alive. Nothing was too improbable, maybe I was a ghost who would have to haunt the airways and jetstreams until my soul would be at rest. Maybe I was crazy. Maybe I was a crazy ghost.

Was that wheezing getting closer and louder?

I knew I shouldn't move in case of a broken spine but when the sound of the imagined pug dog seemed louder and closer and much, much bigger than even a bulldog or a mastiff, I lifted and turned my head to take a look.

And found myself nearly nose to nose with a mass of fur and halitosis that could only be a bear.

"Sarah," I thought. "The flight attendant's name was Sarah."

Then I screamed.

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Comments

Grassy knoll?

Now where have I heard that phrase before?

How can we bear the suspense(ion) of disbelief?

Robi

Nothing so lovely as a day

Nothing so lovely as a day in June?


I'll get a life when it's proven and substantiated to be better than what I'm currently experiencing.

And I thought

she was supposed to had landed on a ... never mind, but it certainly wasn't a bear. LOL! :)
hugs
Grover

PS: And what happened to her little dog?

Crazy wizzard, Crazy story

Where this crazy story is going I am not sure, but I find myself interested in where it will come out. I await to find out where she has landed and how life proceeds.

JessieC

Jessica E. Connors

Jessica Connors

Sarah

Must have shaved before the flight surely

LOL

erin's picture

Actually, this bit was because I had just read an article that said an unpleasant sight could help you remember things because it pokes you just in the same part of the brain where facts are sorted for remembering. And it was one more joke to stick into the story. :)

Hugs,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

Nice!

LibraryGeek's picture

"Sarah," I thought. "The flight attendant's name was Sarah."

Then I screamed.

Yours,

JohnBobMead

Yours,

John Robert Mead

I can't bear the suspense

Angharad's picture

Here she is practically bare facing a bear having survived a five mile fall from a plane. Um - wonderful, I think it's wonderful. Now then, will she strangle the bear so she can borrow its coat? Its name isn't Toto is it?

Angharad

Angharad

it could be a cowardly bear

since there aren't any lions handy. Forget heart, brains, or courage, what I want most from this wizard is more of this silly story ...

Dorothycolleen, member of Bailey's Angels

DogSig.png

Ask and you shall receive...

Jemima Tychonaut's picture

I had never known I could fly before. Was it something I could only do when scared to death? Lots of luck recreating the necessary conditions for that experiment.

Ermmm... ask and you shall receive? A big bear with halitosis sounds just like the sort of scared to death condition where testing the idea that he can fly would be a good thing to do. That assuming its not a winged bear of course!

Either way screaming sounds a perfectly sane thing to do in the circumstances, so I think Dale isn't a crazy ghost. I'm not ruling out ghost yet, just not a crazy one!

 


"Just once I want my life to be like an 80's movie, preferably one with a really awesome musical number for no apparent reason. But no, no, John Hughes did not direct my life."



"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."

Off to Seek a Wizard -7- Just a Crazy Ghost?

Lions and tigers and bears, Oh my!

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

She gets a D in spelling

The "my name starts with an S" has me wondering if the fall made her forget her true identity.

A breathtaking cliffhanger

... now all we have to do is bear the waiting. :)

Kim

Flying Magi and Talking Bears

terrynaut's picture

If one can happen why not both? I say the bear can talk and her name is Shirley.

I'm home now and freezing because my apartment takes forever to warm up. Thanks for distracting me from the cold for a wee bit.

Thanks and kudos.

- Terry

Just read it all

In the course of an hour or so. Brilliant, love it and the wackyness of it all is just right. I'm surprised though, with the whole flying thing, that no one yet has made a hitchhiker’s joke about it being a matter of falling without hitting the ground :)

The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once - Albert Einstein

So many jokes

erin's picture

It's hard to get them all in. :)

Hugs,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

I've no words.

Daphne Xu's picture

Surviving a five-mile fall, only to be eaten by a bear?

-- Daphne Xu

-- Try saying freefloating three times rapidly.