My Super Secret Life-28.
It’s been about four days since they cleared me from being off on medical and I’m back to living in my quarters as Tyler…well as me. It’s been increasingly different being a guy full time and honestly as much as dad’s trying to offer advice he’s sort of got this too scientific style in how to be a guy for me.
Steven is too busy and as Champion he’s busy too much for me to get advice from on being a guy beyond the fact that he suggested the best way to get past this was to live a mile or two in guy boots.
Bodi is actually the guy that I’ve been sort of hanging out with. He’s a reserve member and the head mechanic for the tower and an actual surfer. The reason I mention that is Bodi creates generates these photon particles like Daystar up in Ark City and they sort of make him glow golden and give him a light force field but they let him fly and I guess at first it was like energy trails from his feet but he sucked at control but working with like Parvati and hypnosis to shape the energy he creates a surfboard of light that he uses as the focus for his flight powers and that really increased his manoeuvrability and stuff.
But powers have their drawbacks as it were and Bodi has what you’d call a glamour. Women who are in contact with him are exposed to this strange sub-space signal that affects the attraction and pleasure centers of their brains.
There’s a lot of meta women that are mostly immune, mostly it’s more like a level of resistance with like mage types and psychics being able to block it out and the rest it’s a sliding exposure scale. I’m not affected like this and less than a normal person as Sunny and Terry is about the same unless she’s armored up then she’s immune to it. And it doesn’t just affect women anyone that’s attracted to men in general is affected by the glamour. Parvati is making him another charm to tone it down but his powers burn through them pretty quick and they take time and a lot of energy to enchant.
The bad thing is Bodi has increase body symetrics as part of his powers or mutation and that’s basically where your mutation doesn’t just make you a good looking hard body like most supers get to be but it pushes you into the next level of like being a model before you got the good power set.
So he’s kind of the team hermit really and keeps a low profile unless he’s called out for an all hands thing.
He’s got a really nice place even if it’s a man-cave literally as it’s in the basement levels of the tower close to the workshops and stuff and hooked to his private workshops. I’m still blown away buy the dozen or so private garage bays he has with the cars and motorbikes that he’s working on. Bodi might be a Meta and have some cool but strange powers but he’s an artist and a bit of a genius when it comes to building stuff.
Like I said the place is amazing but it’s a man cave and kind of perfect for a guy as I’m learning and Bodi’s becoming a friend. I mean who better to hang out with than a guy that has such a thing going on he has a hard time trusting any kind of relationship with a girl.
I know I said there’s exceptions to all of that but to find a girl that’s immune enough…that’d be interested even if she wasn’t attached. So yeah so far he’s alone still.
I think he’s in a couple of online relationships though where they don’t have to meet face to face and it’s keeping him sane.
So it’s kind of good that we’re getting to be friends. I mean to hear a guy talk about guy stuff and not just like cars and sports and stuff but relationships and how guys see stuff and getting exposed to the smaller stuff of being a guy. There’s a million little things that I can’t really explain but I’m sort of feeling that are there this sort of way you’re supposed to be and stuff. And that’s different than what I thought it was. I was really thinking being a guy was kind of about being tough and getting laid or the pursuit of getting laid.
Even Terry hangs with us even if she spends a lot of that time hanging out in her diamond for and Shane too and Kyle…Shane doesn’t seem affect at all so maybe she can block him out by using her chi like a psi. And Kyle came up with an early warning thing for Terry so when she’d naturally start to feel a physical response to Bodi her heart rate would go up and her nipples would harden and her pupils would dilate. After about three successful rounds of timing it we figured about forty nine minute of exposure to Bodi was when it’s get past her healing factor and hit her. So her watch would go off about every 45 minutes and it was either armor up or go for a bit of a walk.
But we’ve been sort of hanging out together.
That’s kind of good Bodi’s twenty seven and I’m getting this whole wealth of stuff from just hanging out with him on the big brother level. And there’s this whole gender culture of guy stuff that I’m getting exposed to like a sort of way of being like there is for being a girl only there’s almost a more of a code to follow thing for guys.
And I’m learning.
The biggest thing that I’ve learned that guys are just as contradictory as women in a way. And they all want to find that girl even if they bullshit themselves about it better than girls. And wow it’s sort of turning out that guys are a lot better at lying to themselves than girls are.
They cheat…and this is a lot of stuff but it’s mostly a love and happiness thing. If a guys not happy he’ll cheat, he’ll cheat and keep cheating until he gets caught because he wants out…even if he can’t/won’t admit to it. They cheat because they’re not getting something out of their relationship and can’t or won’t admit or tell they’re partner what the want or need.
Gotta be stoic.
Girls can’t mind read no matter how hard they try. They want guys to tell them even though guys can’t or won’t it’s programmed into them. And girls don’t play the head games, don’t make him try to guess what’s wrong you lay that out straight for them. The stuff we think is testing them they see as bullshit head games. Guess what the girl who does that shit the least is the happier one with her guy. I can get that too because Sunny growing up we’re as girls introduced to the hey I’m pretty game that we sort of do as training for finding and weeding out our perfect guy.
Well according to Shane and Terry the guys that we do that with are all the guys that we do that with because if we never did it then some other girls did. We girls think we’re so screwed up and damaged well we do a lot of damage to guys ourselves.
Terry especially looks like she’s remembering what it was like to get the games girls play done to them. She broke the controller to one of Bodi’s video games in her hands.
And I’m not saying that women and girls are all bitches and stuff I’m just admitting that we actually do have a completely equal share in the whole Men are Dogs/Pigs thing. It really is a sow what you reap kind of thing.
I’m really seeing two sides of this lately.
It’s interesting and stuff.
The thing though that I’m getting though is that there is a much more literal path that guys set for themselves. It’s also how they just let stuff go. Once things are done with they’re done with until it either goes away and stays away or the situation comes up again and then they’ll deal with it. They don’t have whatever girls have inside of them that keeps us obsessing over things. I think it’s hardwired into them like the being stoic. Don’t show fear or emotions like that because that was a disadvantage back in our origins as a species and don’t waste time worrying about things you can’t change because it’s a waste of energy.
I think women of female brained people fret and worry stuff to death because it’s an adaptation to having lots of children you have to keep so much in mind with them that when you don’t have that stimulus we’ve adapted in an almost negative way. Or the way women and girls stress about that is hardwired in us to practice for having to take care and keep track of multiple well beings.
God I still sound like my dad. I wonder if it’s the serum bringing that out of me. There’s been a lot to think about really and even more so with me signing on to go and train at this halo place and having the whole thing paid for by The Tower. Shane’s going too and Kyle and even Terry. The Tower and The Champions are part of the people doing this whole thing and we’re still going to be Champions but we’re going there for an education and for training. This place is supposed to be really set up seriously to train us and others of the whole up and coming generation of Supers.
But today I’m not hanging with the crew instead I’m going shopping and not as Sunny but as Tyler and I guess it makes sense. I mean I can sort of recreate clothing on me but if I take it off it sort of dissolves away in about twenty minutes even if it’s made from what I was wearing before so I need my own clothes. Most of what I can form is the Titan gear so my clothes have been sort of limited lately.
This was actually Bodi’s idea so that I get out there and stop hiding from being out there in the world and to get my own sense of what I like and what I don’t and just be me without the others and he’s sort of getting things going with the others with vehicles. Terry needs something that will handle her weight and stuff and she’s super happy about getting wheels. Kyle’s getting a bike and Shane’s helping Bodi because in that other life of hers before she changed she was all into the Motor beach racing scene.
I was even given a car and it’s a remake of this old 20th century thing that just spoke to me. It’s got a modern engine if a bit suped up by Bodi to police standards but it has the black and the gold that’s sort of my colors as Titan. They call it a Trans-Am.
I really like it.
There’s something about have the T-top opened and listening to tunes while I’m driving around town. I’m just looking at stores and checking my phone to see the sales links before even going in there. I guess it’s a left over from Sunny. There’s stuff that isn’t net linked at all and those places are kind of interesting.
I park the car and head into this tiny little strip mall and this leather shop. There were some neat jackets in the window.
I’m looking around and I see Matt.
He’s himself sort of with dress pants on and deck shoes and one of his jerseys on for the team and he’s got a bit of gothy looking eye shadow and mascara on but that’s it.
It’s been just over a week since I’ve seen them last and that was Alexis. I go over and nudge his shoulder. “Heya.”
He turns and he actually smiles at me. “Hey how’s it?”
“Good, starting to get a grip on things.”
“Ty, you had a grip on things before.” He’s grinning.
I’m blushing. “Yeah well that was Dad’s big scientific plan to get me over being a male slut by over exposing me to it.”
“That won’t work there’s a huge difference between porn and real life.”
“I know but I’ve been lately hanging with Bodi and well you know Terry has the other side of my equation but he had it way worse than us so I’ve been going through sort of this immersion therapy thing.”
“Sort of my brain is taking the girls I look at and is doing this sort of looking them over from these different angles.”
“Well Sunny sort of see’s the way the girl might be in that bad suspicious bitchy way, then she also see’s her through that empathic way of a girl knowing the way a girl might want to be treated and I take all of that and I weight in on what it’s be like to maybe actually get to know them and still kind of be that nice guy too that I want to be instead of the sex crazed idiot.”
“So like I said how’s that working?”
“Okay, It’s a bit skeevie actually I mean it’s not like I’m not getting recognized going around like this and the girls that are way too interested have been setting off my “Sunny sense” and there’s a lot more women and girls out there than I ever thought that are into me for maybe money or fifteen minutes of fame than I thought.”
“Yeah it’s my inner ability to sense a skank coming in for the con.”
“Useful but dude you shouldn’t be surprised, this is Paradise City home of the fakest people on New Haven.”
“Yeah but I’ve never really seen it from this side of things and to be part of a brand…it’s really strange.”
“That’s not strange yet wait until you really make a name and there’ll be press around you like flies.”
“I’ve had a few but not that many, a lot of regular people taking pictures though usually whenever I’m buying something.”
“Those’ll be in the rumor rags or online soon enough.”
(Sigh.) “Yeah guess so.”
“So you just shopping around or are you getting your stuff for Halo?”
“Aw…shit I forgot about all of the stuff that I’m going to need for that.”
“A little, I’m actually trying to adjust to guy swearing. Saying poo just sounds wrong when I’m like this.”
“Yeah unless you’re really camp.”
“Uh-huh, uhm Matt?”
“Don’t take this the wrong way but I’m not attracted to you right now?”
“None taken I’m not really so much into you either.”
“VG remember, I’m like you but without the change and the super powers.”
“So if I was Sunny?”
“And we were back together?”
“There’s changing rooms here…I miss…well we’d either get kicked out or we’d end up making one hell of a sex tape from the security video.”
“I miss us too.”
The change is there it’s like a switch and Matt’s there but gone too in a way the way they move even in just turning from the rack of coats and step one step into me and poking my in the chest with her finger tells me it’s Alexis and part of me can feel it…like their energy inside switch polarity or something.
“Yes good, what you did hurt me and it was more the lying and stuff and when you chose to fucking tell me Tyler. I miss us too I miss the way you and I clicked too but you really need to make good buddy.”
“Tell me what I can do and I’ll.”
She puts her hand over my mouth and smiles at me. “No, you know better than that. You want me back then you do the work Tyler, making up and asking a girl out is like presents Tyler it’s the thought that counts.”
She’s not really playing around, it’s still that whole girl thing of not directly saying what she wants but that’s alright because I get it. She doesn’t know what she wants beyond me making something special, she want’s me to make the effort. I pull her hand off of my mouth and look her in the eyes.
“Okay. Are you free tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow?” I think the suddenness surprised her.
“Yes, all day.”
I lean over and take her chin in my hand and I give her this light whispery ghost of a kiss. “I really have missed you.”
And I leave her there staring at me leaving while she’s holding a jacket that’d look good on Matt. Her eyes are a little wide from what I can see in the reflection of the shops door.
I might sound all sure of myself but inside I have no idea what I’m going to do tomorrow.
But I want them back…both of them.
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