I have been under a lot of stress at work and the HR coordinator (Human Resources), Ms. Stark suggested I see a stress management councilor she knows.

This will be my second monthly visit. Dr. Powers has already helped. She recommended Semi-EXperimental-Clinical-Hyper-Anxiety-Negation-Gender-Effect Therapy. She always used the full name whenever she spoke of it. Supposedly she needed for me to enter a therapeutic trance in order to begin the session. She said I would be very relaxed afterward, but that complete remission of all my symptoms of stress would take several visits. She also gave me a prescription for special pills to accelerate my progress.

“I am.”

“I am myself.”

“I will always be just who I am.”

“Good good. Now I have some new underwear for you. These are called ‘boy shorts’. They are your underwear. Now you.”

“These are my underwear. Boy shorts are my underwear.”

“Very good. Now, this is what you wear under your tops. It is VERY important that you always wear colour matched underwear and co-ordinate the colour of your underwear with the clothes you wear. Now you.”

“This is my undershirt.”

“No, we do not call it that, if you must have a name for it, it is called a ‘cami’. How you.”

“This is my cami, my cami must always match my boy shorts. My underwear must always co-ordinate with the clothes I wear.”

“Very very good. I think that’s enough for now. Go on, get dressed.”

***

I’ve had to go out to buy new underwear, because I only had the one set that I felt like wearing. Can you believe they sent me to the ladies department at Sears to buy ‘boy shorts’? The nice part was that the sales-lady there was able to show me lots of matching camis, though she did give me a funny look or two before she gave a little shrug and helped me find everything I needed. Some of my new underwear is very soft and smooth. I feel kind of sexy when I feel it against my skin.

“I am.”

“I am myself.”

“I will always be just who I am.”

“Excellent. As of today you will generally call the first layer of clothing on your feet and legs, hose. You will begin with hose called stockings, they are just a longer version of socks, but they don’t stay up well on their own so we will reintroduce something that men wore many many years ago, garters. Your garters will often be hanging from a garter-belt. Now you.”

“I will wear stockings held up by garters on a garter-belt.”

“Great. I am sure you must be having feelings of height anxiety. There are shoes that would help you stand taller, IF you want to wear them.”

“Could I PLEASE wear shoes to make me taller?”

“I’m not sure. You would need to practice walking in them. It isn’t easy. The heels on these type of shoes is fairly narrow.”

“I will practice every day until I am perfect.”

***

The lady at Sears remembered me from my previous visit. She set me up with quite a few pairs of stockings of various styles that I thought was very nice of her. When I asked for garter-belts in matching colours to my underwear, she asked me to remind her what colours I had. Then she found garter-belts in almost all the right colours. She said I could get by with some that weren’t quite a match so long as the colours ‘went’ together. It was a little confusing but she showed me a few examples and then I sort of got it. When I asked her about shoes to make me taller, she sent me to a friend of hers in the shoe department. I now own six pairs of shoes with heels and two pair of boots. I have been practicing all week in my apartment. The tenant below me has been pounding on the ceiling for some strange reason. I’ve started wearing my new shoes to work. No-one has noticed, but then I have been getting there at 06:30 and usually not leaving before 19:00 every day.

“I am.”

“I am myself.”

“I will always be just who I am.”

“Lovely. You must be wishing for some variety in your underwear. These are called bikinis and these are thongs. Would you like to wear them for a change?”

“Could I please wear bikinis or thongs instead of boy shorts?”

“That would be fine, but you still must match colours of underwear and that definitely includes your garter-belt. Are you nipples sore? I see them poking out of your cami.”

“They are a little sore and itchy.”

“There is a way to protect them from rubbing so much. This should help quite a bit. You would wear it under your cami.”

“I can’t wear that it itt iiitt’s a bra.”

“Well, it’s up to you. It would help a lot with your nipples. Besides, who would see it under all your clothes. Here feel how soft and smooth it is. Isn’t that scrumptious?”

“It’s very nice, but I couldn’t.”

“Keep it in mind every second that you feel the rubbing of your nipples.”

***

I held out for two weeks, before heading to Sears for new bras. By then I was almost going mad with all the rubbing.

There was a new sales-lady and she was quite snarky. She made me feel about two inches tall before the other lady came back to help me. I felt SO much better that my friendly sales-lady was here. She said not to worry she would straighten out the other lady and I shouldn’t have any trouble in the future. I was very embarrassed to ask for help with a bra, but she actually hugged me and then proceeded to measure and fit me with five new bras in various colours and styles. She said I would need more for all the different clothes I might wear, but to wait until I finished before spending too much on lingerie. I didn’t completely get what she was talking about, so just thanked her and left.

“I am.”

“I am myself.”

“I will always be just who I am.”

“I think it’s time for you to start a better grooming and hygiene program. All that body hair is very unsightly, your legs must itch like crazy in your hose, and you need to keep your scalp hair tidy and neat.”

“I will start keeping my body hairless and do my hair properly.”

“I see you licking your lips a lot, this would help keep your lips soft and smooth.”

“L-lipstick?”

“Think of it as coloured chap-stick. You should keep your lips always covered and always exactly on the lips, not teeth or around your mouth. You must practice two hours every day until you have mastered the look. You will LOVE how it accents your lips.”

“I will practice putting on lipstick and always wear it. It will accent my lips.”

“Would you like to have your ears pierced? It would make you look even better. It used to be only women wore earrings but now men wear them too.”

“I would love to get my ears pierced.”

***
On my way to Sears, I passed a hair salon that advertised ear piercing. I have always wanted to get my ears pierced so I stopped. As I was pondering the piercing, I noticed my reflection in the shop window. My hair was, well, messy. I though, HEY, I can kill two birds with one stone. The receptionist seemed a little stand-offish at first but soon was suggesting several styles that could look very glamorous on me. Suffice to say an hour and a half later I walked out with a new do and pretty studs in my ears. They even did a facial and make-up, for what reason I couldn’t say, but I KNOW I looked very nice. They also sold me a big bag-full of products that they said I really needed to keep looking good.

“I am.”

“I am myself.”

“I will always be just who I am.”

“I’ll bet your pants are very tight in the hips and loose in the waist. Tell me where you have been shopping.”

“Yes my clothes are not fitting properly anymore. I’ve shopped at Sears. Should I buy new pants there?”

“Sears is not bad, but I think you might want to spread your shopping out a bit more. You know Victoria’s Secret has wonderful underwear, right? I think it should be your new favourite store for them. Your new trousers shouldn’t all have an ugly fly at the front, it takes away from the smooth line of some clothes.”

“How will I go to the bathroom without a zipper fly?”

“Haven’t you found it a chore to pee standing up when your panties don’t have a fly-front?”

“Well, yes, but what can I do?”

“The answer is very simple. From now on you must always squat to pee and wipe yourself with tissue to keep yourself clean.”

“That makes sense.”

“You will find that only women’s clothing will fit properly from now on. Men’s wear is too scratchy, coarse and restricting.”

“I couldn’t wear skirts or dresses.”

“Women wear trousers too, but kilts and sarongs are worn by men so I don’t see why you should feel uncomfortable in them. There are kilts or skirts that are almost like kilts available not far from the women’s trousers you will be buying and wrap skirts are very similar to sarongs. I strongly suggest you try them. You will feel VERY good when you wear them, I know it.”

***

The sales-lady in the women’s department at Sears was very nice. She helped me choose four pairs of trousers, she even made sure they were all long enough to look good with my heels. She also suggested ‘boot cut’ jeans to go with my high-heeled boots, so I bought two pair of those too, even though they had ugly fly-fronts. When she walked into the changing room and saw me wearing stockings, she insisted that with legs as pretty as mine I needed several skirts to show them off. I felt very self-conscious when she told me to come out to the main area of the ladies dressing rooms to show her how I looked in the four different skirts she had me try. They were all just long enough to cover my stocking tops, but I had to agree with her that they did look good. But the clincher was the feeling I got, wearing a skirt, just WOW! I ended up buying all four that I tried and three more to boot. (Yes the boots looked great with them too, I tried them at home.) After I paid for all the trousers and skirts, the sales-lady said she just couldn’t stand it if I didn’t get a few ‘proper’ tops to go with all the lovely ‘bottoms’ I had just purchased. After another two hours of trying tops I headed for home with blouses, sweaters, and even jackets, that, much as I was worried about looking too feminine, looked very good on me. I spent the rest of Saturday and most of Sunday removing all my old clothes (into green garbage bags) and hanging up all my lovely new clothes. I wore skirts the whole time I was doing all the arranging. I would REALLY miss the feel of them when I dressed for work on Monday. They are just so darned comfortable. I should really go out and buy myself a few dresses, but I sort of maxed out my credit cards on Saturday.

“I am.”

“I am myself.”

“I will always be just who I am.”

“Why are you wearing pants? I thought you would feel more comfortable in a skirt?”

I do feel better in a skirt, but what would people think of me? I wear them at home all the time, but going out I have to look a little less feminine.”

“Why? You look just fine. You should be proud of yourself. Show your legs to the world, but you MUST adjust your posture. When you sit, always sit upright toward the front of the chair, chest foreward and legs together, you do NOT want anyone peaking up your skirt or dress. You may cross your legs but you need to keep your calves touching. You will find it much more comfortable to cross your legs when wearing a skirt or dress. Plus, the feeling of your nylon covered legs sliding against one-another will always give you a sexual thrill.”

“I do feel sexy when my legs rub together.”

“Now, step over here. See the person in front of you? If you had never seen this person before, what do you think this person’s name would be?”

“I-I-I-I see the person. Her name is probably Tiffany or maybe Jillian.”

“Ok if this person didn’t have a name and you could choose it, which would you choose for her?”

“Tiffany. She is Tiffany.”

“Is Tiffany male or female?”

“Tiffany is a woman.”

“Repeat your opening mantra.”

“I am.”

“I am myself.”

“I will always be just who I am.”

“You are looking into a mirror. Who is the person in the mirror.”

“Tiffany.”

“Who is Tiffany?”

“She is the reflection in the mirror.”

“Who are you?”

“I am Tiffany.”

“Again?”

“I am Tiffany.”

“Male or female?”

“I am a woman.”

“Those two lines are your new mantra. For the next week you will repeat your new mantra twenty times each morning when you first look into a mirror and at any other time; once, each and every time you see your reflection.”

“Three, Two, One,… wake up.”

“Hi doctor, how did I do?”

“I believe your course of treatments is complete. Your stress level is much lower. If you feel uncomfortable in the future all you need to do is call me and we can set an appointment for a refresher.”

With my hips swaying and my heels clicking noisily I walked the half block back to work.

Ms. Stark wanted to see me as soon as I got back, so I minced off to her office.

“Good you’re here. How were the stress sessions?”

“Dr. Power said my treatments were done.”

“I have bad news for you. The company is downsizing your position. There is another position available but at a slightly lower rate of pay.”

I was shocked. After all I had done and been through for the company they were firing me. I wanted to cry and before I even knew it was happening I felt a trail of hot tears running down my cheeks.”

Ms. Stark handed me a tissue. “There there, don’t cry. Your mascara is running.”

“What can I do?” I sobbed. I looked through my purse for my compact to repair my makeup.

“Well although the new position I’m offering you doesn’t pay quite as much as you were getting the company is supplementing the pay with a clothing and make-up allowance. If you sign up you would not only receive a severance package but also a sign-up clothing bonus.”

I looked at the amounts of the two bonuses and realized that I would be able to pay off all my bills and still have a sizable balance to pay for new clothes.

“The new position is for a receptionist in the front lobby. You would be required to be well groomed at all times and always wear smart dresses or skirts with appropriate tops and shoes or boots with a minimum of three inch heels. They want some eye-candy out front.”

“Hmmm, I don’t know…”

I’m only supposed to offer this as a last resort but they are also willing to throw in weekly salon visits to keep the receptionist looking her best. Look the reason I want you for this position, instead of some bimbo off the street, is that you already know the company and most of the employees. You look good and you are intelligent enough to separate the wheat from the chaff, when it comes to prioritizing customers’ and suppliers’ inquiries. I need to fill this position ASAP, but I’ll give you until tomorrow morning to think about it.”

“Thank you so much. I’ll call you in the morning.”