Only it was everyone else that was getting changed!
by Bailey Summers
All rights reserved.
Hi everyone Bailey here. I just want to give a huge thank you and a shout out to Tarzana who co-wrote the letter that’s featured here. It came about from a talk between us and she came up with amazing things. Really she did about three quarters of the work in there so….thanks and enjoy!
Image Credit: anime couple
He left school with Johnny and Danny as well as Honey, Lindsey and Nick. He had Nick in his last class and Dan too but Nick was a little more vulnerable to some of the people in the school who were less than friendly to the other kids that were a little bit different.
They dropped Honey off first and then Danny and Lindsey and finally Johnny before heading to Nick’s place and he looked at the clock. “You have wireless?”
Nick nodded. “We’ve got a really g..good system.”
Jess looked at him. “You stutter less around people in smaller groups?”
Nick nodded again. “Su..Social Anxiety Disorder…n..new people and..cr..crowds and me d..don’t mix.”
“So me being not so new and it just being us helps?”
“Good to know, we can work on that then.”
“Sure we’ve got a good group of people who already like you as is, the whole speaker phone thing and all so we just get you slowly more used to us and the group and the familiar thing should work itself out.”
“M..my shrink said I should try and b..be..more outgoing…but when you have a social disfunction it’s…it’s h..hard to m..m..make friends. Th..then the assholes l..like t..to trigger my issues once they think they c..can hurt me.”
“Some shrinks are okay and some of them aren’t worth their degrees all you need is someone to actually give a shit and see your issue as something to work with.”
“Yeah it’s a thing a part of you that makes you, you Nick either they drug you up or make you fight it instead they should be listening and trying to work with it.”
“I…I don’t get it?”
“You get to shore a whole lot faster when you swim with the current instead of fighting it.”
“Yeah, and you can have some really geek fun with the whole voice app stuff too.”
He started to talk about some of his ideas as they got out of the car and Nick invited him in for a drink and he got them both a soda. Some of Jessie’s ideas had him laughing out loud.
It drew Nick’s mom into the kitchen and she definitely stared at the two of them and she was definitely staring at Jessie’s chest.
Jessie noticed and smiled at her and waved. Nick blushed but his mother went back to doing what she was doing leaving them alone.
“She thinks I’m a girl.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“If they think I’m a girl will they give you less grief over the small stuff here at home?”
Nick thought about it. He nodded. “They..they would be thr…thrilled.”
“Then we don’t tell them any different until it changes?”
“Your relationship status.”
He stared in shock at Jessie. “Mmm…me?”
“Yes you You’re a smart good looking guy Nick you just have a few quirks.”
“Hey is Sam a mess?”
“Then neither are you.”
Nick sat there blinking at Jessie really not sure how to feel or how to act since no one had really sat here and talked to him like this or looked at him like this. And he ducked his head and blushed a little and sort of smiled.
Smiling with people didn’t come naturally since they rarely amounted into times for smiles.
Jessie leaned over to look nick in the face and caught his eyes after a minute. “Nick…you’re not broken.”
“I’m not?” No one had ever told him that he wasn’t. Not the doctors or the therapists or even his parents.
Jessie leaned over more and actually gave Nick a kiss on the lips, softly and gently and over and over a few times before breaking it.
“Maybe a little dented but not broken…no.”
Nick exhaled and shivered from the kiss. “Woah……” he blinked then tasted his lips and stared at Jessie. “I…I thought you and Kenyon?”
“We’re going out tomorrow night; I’m not even sure how it’ll go or even if he’s my type.”
“But you kissed me?”
Jessie shrugged. “It just felt right Nick…what can I say that close…what we were talking about…and my heart just went kiss him.”
Jessie nodded. “I’m human Nick, sometimes my head rules the day and sometimes it’s my heart and sometimes it’s both.”
“Oh…” Nick sort of got it. It was one of those things he sort of understood about people. Actually he didn’t because this is the stuff that they say, and want to do and dream about or write about but Jess was the first person he ever met that just actually was truthful enough to actually do it.
“Did you mind it? I mean that I kissed you?”
“No..N..No Jessie it was nice.”
Jessie smiled at him. “Good…I didn’t want to weird you out.”
“N..no, just surprised…I d..don’t think of m..myself that ww..way.”
“I know, it part of why I kissed you…you don’t deserve to think of yourself like that.”
Nick blushed and Jessie smiled but blushed a little too and took out his laptop and brought up the document that he’d been writing to tell people about the meeting. He showed it to Nick who read it and then read it again and ran his fingers through his hair then even sort of crossed his arms like he was hugging himself.
“So…what do you think?”
“It’s a rant…it’s a good rant a sp..sp..speach even.”
“N..nn..no, people need to see something like this. Th…th..the status quo needs to..to…”
Jessie grinned. “To loose a little of its precious status?’
Nick nodded. “Jessie, it’s good ff..fine pu..people nn..need to here someone being passionate abut t..th..this.”
Jessie nodded. “I was thinking of sending it to some of the local new channels.”
“Anyone really, students and teachers and parents, the cops.”
“I..I can do that.”
“I have all th..the e-mails for the school…the staff…and students…the PTA and the School Board.”
Jess gave Nick this solid look. “You would considering.”
Nick looked at him and nodded slowly. “Suh…something had to bb..be done…”
“I agree, you must be really good with computers then.”
Nick shrugged. “G..gg..good enough to get federal time and gg..good enough to be working for them instead of it.”
Jessie raised an eyebrow and Nick just looked back. Okay jess thought he’s really not kidding. Jess could use a computer but all the deep programming stuff and jargon and he was as lost as everyone else.
“So you can get this all set up?”
Nick gestured. “We’ll need my real computer but yy..yes.”
They went to Nick’s bed room which only partway looked like a bed room and the other half like a starship bridge with all the computers and keyboard and interface stuff. He even had three monitors and three flat screen TV’s mounted on brackets and shelves with games and games and books and books and some of them looked like really odd phone books and stuff.
“Wow are you rich?”
“N..no…but some of these are salvaged from d..dd..dad’s upgrading at work I just had to bb..buy the cards and stuff tt..to upgrade them. I bb—bought one TV and the other’s are yuuh used.”
“So just amazing and smart then.”
Nick blushed and shot Jessie a look and jess just looked back. “What you are and I’m not going to be shy about telling you Nick.”
Jessie looked at him and smiled and leaned against one of the stacked shelves hands in his back pockets and that could have been to show the “girls” off more or just comfortable.
“You stand up for things Nick, you’re out muscled and outgunned and you had some pretty long odds against you even before you started all of this. That’s brave and it’s a damned honnorable thing to do in my book.”
“I..II…’ He was seriously blushing.
“That’s why I kissed you…you deserved it…heroes deserve a kiss…guys like you should actually know what they’re worth especially when everyone around them is wrong.”
Jessie moved to go and sit beside Nick and looked at him. “No Nick I’m right, you are worth every word okay?”
Nick stared at Jessie.
He felt it a little easier to dig down deeper to get past the anxiety and he bit his lip and nodded. “Okay…Uhm…l..ll..let’s get to work.”
Jessie gave him his e-mail list including some of the e-mail addresses for people in city hall, police, fire department, they sent to every news paper in the city, The ACLU, two of the local news channels and everyone connected to the school.
Jessie smiled as Nick worked he played tunes and he’d have pegged him for the kind of techie that’d be into all the techno music but he actually played some older rock which was pretty cool.
*Something to believe in.* By Poison was a song in that playlist that just sort of fit the whole spirit of what they were doing.... “Hey Nick?”
“Will you get traced and caught doing this?’
“No..nnn..not likely…I..use different servers and ha..ha..have places that will send it out after…random cycles…so it doesn’t come back to mm..me..”
Jessie nodded but really didn’t have a clue and shrugged and even blushed when Nick stared at him. They both sort of smiled together over that, over everything today…it had been a really long day and at the say time they’d been through a lot together from it.
Definitely a good thing.
Nick finished all the things he needed to do. He had set up the whole defense idea for his web page so it’d ne hard to trace and even harder to kill. Mind you he had no illusions of the FBI or DHS finding him if they really seen him as a threat. This wasn’t the kind of thing that would bring that kind of heat…exposing people for who they really where and calling out like this against bullying and the status quo at the school wasn’t exactly domestic terrorism it actually was more like the anti version of it.
They looked at each other.
Jessie pushed their chair over and got close to Nick and they looked at each other again almost cheek to cheek…kind of electric and yet kind of just two defiant teens getting ready to Tilt.
They clicked… Send All together.
***To all those concerned please read this letter.***
There is a meeting that was scheduled for tonight to be held by the School board of my district and the faculty of my school, West Chicago High School. Please note that this meeting has been changed to Monday night at 8 PM In the auditorium and please all who get this please attend.
The purpose of this meeting is for them to come up with a “Solution.” To the problem of kids that are fed up with being victims outing their abusers and abusers of others by using camera phones and posting these things up to the light of public scrutiny.
In case you do not know that is illegal in this state.
For everyone…apparently you can join the military or own a firearm in this state given the correct age but you can’t record your abuse or abuser without facing charges.
We aren’t even allowed to have cameras placed inside the school. I’m no fan of too much big brother but…we’re talking about a public school and in public hallways where the expectation of privacy is at the very least nebulous.
Why are those that are causing the most harm protected form being caught and punished because their right to privacy somehow trumps my rights for a safe place to get an education?
Please come and voice your opinions, many of us in the student body will be.
I guess I'm still looking for some sort of a silver bullet that will make the BS go away. Make the Bullies leave people alone. Make the world peaceful and prosperous. And let us be who we are.
To people in general, I have to say –
I'm sorry if I make you uncomfortable - I really am. That is the farthest thing from my intention. But I have to be me, and it is immoral for you to force me to behave otherwise unless I physically harm you in some way.
You can use non-violent tactics (shun me, shame me, even shining a spot light sometimes.) to try to make me behave differently or go somewhere else to “do my thing”, but violence against a non-violent 'threat' is not right. I’m no… we are all human beings too you know, I own part of the city square I deserve my place just as much as anyone else, and like everyone else I have no choice in that matter.
Haters have a right to hate. Same as Lovers have a right to love. We don't want any stinking thought crimes or thought police in our free society. But their right to hate stops as soon as they physically assault someone. Same as a Lovers right to love stops as soon as they physically assault someone. Simple, fair rules that apply to EVERYONE ...
... IF you live in a just and fair society
I will never need to assault anyone to be who I am. But if I ever do 'lose my cool' and assault someone as a result of my “need to love” (or as a result of anything else in my life except self defense), I should have the book thrown at me.
It’s a shame that this doesn’t seem to get through some people heads…or hearts.
A Hater doesn't NEED to physically assault someone to be who they are either. But sometimes they do it anyway. When that happens, I say throw the book at them (just like for lovers).
In a fair society, the law would come down hard on thugs all the thugs: Religious Thugs, Corporate Thugs, Racist Thugs, Social Thugs or just Independent thugs.
A thug is a thug, and the first thing you should look for is that they tend to attack the messenger instead of the message. Dead give-away. (Pay attention to the news shows ...)
Right after collecting the garbage and fixing the pot holes, going after thugs should the most important thing a politician thinks about. Sigh, if only ...right?
Gray areas - damn it, why do there have to be gray areas?! The threat of a fist in your face is just words. But what if it is made when no one of authority is around or even watching or even cares? And while I just mentioned verbal threats if that’s the attention that they get then what about the actual attack?
Am I saying that all parts of public life should be recorded…? No but where there is evidence there that will stop bullying and abuse then yes; because someone has to make it sure they’re caught hurting others. I don't know ... history shows that some people always seem to find a way to pervert our best efforts to create a nice place to live. To want to find a way to set them or someone else over others or use it to keep some people down.
ARGH! But does that have to be sort of the way it works. We are living through it as we speak. WTF? And I can tell you and you can ask any other kid in this country on the unpopular end of things…It’s not damned well working.
The system is broke, we’re tired of hurting, we’re tired of being in harms way for just daring to be ourselves.
Please, please come to the meeting, bring your cameras and your families, bring the news and bring the police bring whoever and whatever might make the least bit of difference.
This isn’t a new problem from things like Kent College to Columbine things go to the breaking point and even if the violence does come out at the tormentors then we all know it claims others…just look at the teen suicide rates. Then we ask why?
How can we as a people even dare ask why?
We all know why.
Please…please just come and help us stop this.
Sincerely, The Tired, the Hurting, The Ostracized, and The Scared.
*** The e-mails went out everywhere and some were picked up and read and some sat waiting in e-boxes and moments later the ripple effect started.
At the school………… The phones had begun ringing just before supper close to six in the evening and they just kept coming. The Principal and the VP and the guidance councillor and the secretaries were all fielding calls…..
Parents…The school board…The Superintendant…
*** Charlie Fountaine looked at the e-mail and he noticed that it had gone out to several of the departments in the building. He called Rona Morris over at the Dept of Ed.
“Rona its Charlie I just got this e-mail with this letter…”
“Yes it’s the one talking about stuff over at West Chicago…”
“Oh…it’s that bad?...That many people got this?”
“Blogger and press calls already…okay good luck thanks Roma I need to see this through here at my end.”
He got up and looked at his secretary. “Denise, I need you to stay late we’ve got something that might just be bigger than we want it to here. Make some coffee and order in but before that you’d better get the deputy mayor on the line just in case.”
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