Steve visits his aunt's house during Christmas break and finds a world he never knew existed. Will life ever be the same?

Chapter 14

Steve spread the new clothes he'd bought with Sandy on the living room floor next to piles of what he'd come to think of as his 'schoolwear'. There was no way he could to fit everything in the suitcase and garment bag he owned. He also knew Sandy would badger him to wear the stuff they bought together and he was sure she expected him to bring it.

It had been ten years since he'd last seen his aunt and he'd always wondered why she never came back to town after the divorce. Divorce was discouraged but it wasn't totally uncommon as he had a lot of friends with divorced parents. Aunt Marj on the other hand just disappeared from town and her name was only mentioned in hushed whispers. Now that he knew the truth everything made sense but he was nervous to meet her just the same. It had taken weeks to open up to Doctor Johnson about his secret and Tim was a trusted friend. Sandy didn't give him much of a choice when she showed up at this apartment and the people he'd met at the bar didn't count. Meeting Aunt Marjorie was different. This was a choice to meet someone from his past who knew his secret. She was there when he was born. He tried not obsess about it as he packed though an hour into the drive the doubts of this decision began.

Had he made the right choice?

The only “normal” clothes he'd brought were the ones he wore on his back. His anxiety grew with every mile but in a way it felt freeing. He was going somewhere instead of hiding in his apartment. He tried to think he was acting like Cortez when he burned his boats in the face of the Aztec though thoughts of General Custer in the face of the Dakota kept recurring. He knew Sandy would be cool with it and he just hoped it wouldn't be too weird around Aunt Marjorie.

The GPS led him to the address and Steve found a place just down the street with to park. He put the garmet bag over one shoulder and pulled the suitcase behind him. It wasn't far to the address Sandy gave him and he just hoped no one would notice the makeup bag he'd strapped on top of the suitcase or the purse he wore on his other shoulder.

The neighborhood looked like it had to be older than anyone that lived there as the trees were full grown and the yards well developed. Steve stopped at the foot of the steps that led to the address Sandy had given him and took a deep breath.

There was no going back.

A few steps and a quick knock on the door made it official. An older lady answered that looked nothing like Aunt Marj. The woman looked to be in her mid thirties with close cropped brown hair, a heavy set figure but still one that Steve knew would have caught his interest if the circumstances were different.

The woman asked, “Can I help you?”

Steve answered, “Um ... Is Sandy here?”

“She’s not back from college yet. Are you Steve?”

Steve nodded, “You aren't Aunt Marjorie are you?”

The woman laughed. “No. I’m Kristy. Marjorie is in the other room. We didn't think you'd get here until later.”

Steve walked into the parlor and saw a distinguished looking woman that he recognized right away.

Aunt Marj screamed, “Stevie!”, who then crushed him in a bear hug.

Steve blushed, “Hi Aunt Marj. Thanks for letting me stay at your house.”

Aunt Marj said, “It’s my pleasure. Sandy told me about your ... trouble. We're happy to help.” Steve noticed both ladies eyes had lingered on the purse he wore on his shoulder for the briefest of moments and he felt his face redden.

“It’s a long story.”

Aunt Marj said, “We have plenty of time for that. Let’s get you settled into the guest room.” She showed him to a room upstairs. As he put his suitcase on the bed, he noticed his aunt was still standing in the doorway and saw her eyes were watery.

“What’s wrong Aunt Marj?”

“Oh it’s nothing. I’m just glad to have some family here for the holidays. It's been a long time since I've seen you.” She stood quiet for a few minutes while he unpacked then said, “While you are here my house is yours. I promise there won’t be any judgments.”

Steve smiled, “Even from Sandy?”

Sandy’s mom laughed, “Even from Sandy. She and I had a long talk about you. I know her heart’s in the right place but I told her to remember that there’s really no way for her to understand what you are going through.”

“Thanks, I appreciate that. I'm not sure I understand what I'm going through but I do hope you know Sandy has been really great. The sad fact is she's probably one of my closest friends right now which is sad considering how little we’ve seen each other in the last few years.” Steve looked down at the bed and didn’t say anything.

Marjorie said, “I’ll let you settle in and if you want to talk you won’t find anyone better than Kristy and me. We can talk but are both good listeners and like I said earlier, there are no judgments in my house. Maybe I can even help so you can learn from my mistakes.”

Steve struggled to think of an appropriate response but his aunt walked out the room leaving him alone with his thoughts.

Steve hung up his clothes but hesitated once he got to his makeup bag. It was one thing to have a bunch of skirts and dresses in the closet but quite another to have makeup sitting out in the open in his room. The words “No judgments” rang in his ear as he placed everything around the mirror. Once he was done unpacking, he joined Marjorie and Kristy sitting at the kitchen table.

“We are just starting dinner. You can have a seat or go in the other room to watch some television if you want.”

“I’d like to help.”

“No need.”

“OK.” Steve decided to sit at the kitchen table. It was better to get the inevitable talk over with as soon as possible.

Kristy reached into her purse and pulled out a pack of cigarettes.

Steve asked, “Can I have one of those?” He always felt more confident when he smoked.

Marjorie said, “I didn’t know you smoked.”

Steve smiled, “Well it’s good to know that Sandy didn’t tell you everything about me.”

“She really didn’t tell me much. Other than you know…”

“That I’ve been cross-dressing?”

“Yeah.”

Steve grabbed a cigarette and took a long drag then exhaled slowly. Kristy looked at Marjorie whose face didn't betray any emotion. It felt like he was sitting in Doctor Johnson's office only this time there were two therapists staring at him.

Steve started, “Well I’m sure you have questions so here’s everything in a nutshell. I’ve felt different my whole life but I really didn’t understand it until recently. I think things started a few years ago when I started experimenting with my mom’s makeup table. I felt ashamed and embarrassed every time but I found I couldn't stop. I went from a periodic escape at my mom's dressing table to today where I've pretty much shut myself into my apartment dressed as a woman. I really can’t explain it but the longer I've done it, I've found it harder to stop. It's to the point that when I'm not crossdressed I really feel out of sorts.”

Marjorie interrupted, “So why didn’t you change when you got here? I told you there wouldn’t be any judgments.”

Steve shrugged, “It’s hard to do in front of other people. It's a no win situation.”

“Stevie, I know you don’t know me as well as I’d like and frankly that’s my fault. I had a decision to make a long time ago and I don’t regret it but that doesn’t mean it has been easy“.

Aunt Marjorie paused as she considered her words carefully, “Here’s what I need from you. You are in my house and I insist everyone in my house be honest with themselves and each other. If you are more comfortable in woman's clothing then I insist you wear woman’s clothes. In fact I insist you go change right now.”

“But…”

Steve noticed that Margorie no long had a kind look but instead her face changed to the I-will-be-obeyed that most mother's acquire as a second nature, “No but’s. Now.”

Steve smiled, “I thought Sandy would be the one to badger me into changing.”

Aunt Marj's kind face returned, “And just where do you think Sandy gets it from?”

Steve laughed, raised his hands in mock surrender and retreated to the bedroom then stared into the closet and the outfits he'd bought with Sandy. He'd worn them all since he and Sandy had purchased them and his favorite was a bright floral print with ruffles in the right places. He wanted to be sure about this choice as it felt important. He was picking out an outfit to meet some one from his past even if his aunt did understand. The thought of being home for Christmas and walking into his Mom's kitchen in one of these outfits made him smile and lightheaded at the same time.

'Focus on the present.'

He settled on a simple pink outfit he’d bought with Sandy as it was a combination of class and cute. He had it on in a few minutes but spent another half hour at the dressing table trying to do his best at makeup. He was still struggling there though he knew he'd improved after Sandy's instruction.

Before Sandy's visit, Steve had never worried much about his hair as he just let it grow out and tied it into a pony tail. Men could get away with that look too and it suited both purposes when he crossdressed. It felt like a girl's and that is all that mattered to him.

Then Sandy showed him what could be accomplished with a curling iron and a little styling. The problem was his talents were even close to the task for this either so he decided to take out the tie and let his hair fall straight down. His hair reached well below his shoulders and he thought it looked decent but the problem was his hair in front kept falling down in his eyes. He pushed the hair behind his ears but after spending five minutes fighting it, he grabbed the tie and put his hair back into a pony tail.

Steve took his time going down the stairs, as his feet hadn't grown accustomed to the new two-inch heels Sandy had bought. When he reached the bottom, both Marjorie and Kristy turned and stared.

Steve felt his face redden again but Marjorie spoke and saved him from further embarrassment, “Oh Stevie. You look darling. Come over here and sit at the table and let’s finish our talk.”

As Steve sat, Marjorie stubbed out a cigarette, “Do you realize how lucky you are do you?”

“What do you mean?”

“”Do you know how close you are to passing for female?”

“Not really.”

“You look pretty damned close. I know dozens of trans-women that would kill for your build and facial structure. You can almost pull it off. By the way, did Sandy explain where we live?”

“Not really.”

“This area is called the Village. Do you know why I live in the Village?”

“No.”

“Of course you don’t. Your mom and dad would never talk about such things. I moved to town over ten years ago after I divorced you uncle. I didn't know anyone in town until I heard about a bar just up the street that was said to be gay friendly. One thing you need to remember is this neighborhood was much different back then. The houses are old and most owners had let them fall to a bad state of disrepair. Crime in the neighborhood was rampant.”

“I'm not sure who came up with the idea as we'd drank a lot but a group of us thought it might be a good idea to buy up property in the area near the bar. After all we were spending our night there, why not make our drive home shorter. Most of us lived in the suburbs at the time.”

“Well we sobered up the next morning and when we realized the plan still made sense a few of us decided to do it. That first year a dozen of us were able to purchase homes. Word spread at all of the gay bars and after the idea took hold we even set up an office to assist anyone looking to move into the area. It didn't take long for our idea to spook the local homeowners which only allowed more of us to move in.”

“Today the Village is the focal point for everything LGBT in the city. Over time, the whole neighborhood became a haven for us so-called “freaks”. In fact, you could go to the grocery store in high heels, stretch pants, a tank top wearing a purse and not get a negative comments though you might get a proposition or two. The community is about as understanding as any I've ever seen. I have no doubt that you could walk down to the corner store dressed like that without a problem.”

The thought was both intriguing and terrifying. “Really?”

Aunt Marj nodded, “Really. In fact, I need some milk for dinner. You want to join me to get some?”

“Oh … I don’t know.“

“There's no pressure Steve but I’m telling you it really isn’t a problem.”

“Are you sure?”

“Trust me. No one will care.”

Steve nodded, “OK, I'll do it.”

“Only if you are sure.”

“I’m sure,” Steve said suddenly feeling a bit excited.

“OK let’s go.” She turned to Kristy who was peeling something for dinner. “We'll be back in a few.”

Kristy waved, “Have fun.”

Marjorie grabbed her purse, “Where’s that cute purse I saw when you first arrived Steve?”

Steve gave a sheepish look, “Upstairs.”

“Go get it. A girl never leaves home without her purse.” Steve ran upstairs. When he came back down he saw his aunt had something in her hand. “I have an idea. Pull that tie out of your hair and sit down.”

Steve sat. He felt his aunt tugging on his hair and felt the weight move from his back to a spot higher up.“Oh that’s so precious. Steve go look at yourself in the mirror.”

Steve walked to the bathroom and saw his aunt had used a funny looking barrette to pull his hair back behind his ears but then pulled the hair away from his neck so the ponytail fell from the top of his head into something that looked a lot more feminine.

“It really like it Aunt Marj.” though he wasn't sure the butterflies in his stomach agreed.

Steve saw his aunt smile from across the room as she ordered. “Grab your purse and let’s go.”

Steve obeyed.

As they approached the first group on the sidewalk, his aunt put a hand on his shoulder.

“I have a real quick question. I need to know how to introduce you and I guess it depends on how you see yourself. Are you my crossdressing nephew Steve or something else? I’m good either way.”

“Honestly aunt Marj when I dress like this I’ve started using the name Sara. Is that ok?”

“Of course it is. My niece Sara. I like it.”

Steve felt a twinge in his gut when his aunt said the new name. It felt good.

The walk wasn’t as easy as his aunt made it sound in her kitchen. It was almost 6 PM which seemed to be the time everyone got home from work and congregated on the sidewalks to gossip. Steve saw dozens of people. At the first group everyone turned to greet Marjorie with a warm hello and a few asked if she had time to meet later. Steve watched as his aunt handled the questions like a pro and it was obvious they respected her opinion. That made sense as she was on one of the area founders.

Aunt Marjorie put her hand on Steve's shoulder, “I’d like everyone to meet my niece Sara.”

Everyone replied in unison, “Hello Sara!”

Steve gave a shy wave, unused to this sort of attention, “Hi.”

“Sara is home from college and staying with me for the holidays.”

Everyone at once said a variation of, “Welcome to the neighborhood!”

The conversation moved to other subjects and few of them even gave Steve a second look. Aunt Marj had to force her part in the discussion to a close using dinner as an excuse. Steve noticed as they continued down the street the same thing happened with every group. It seemed like his aunt was determined to introduce him to everyone in the neighborhood. Was this a setup? His sense of embarrassment had long since hit its maximum but the joy he aunt seemed to get in every introduction him gave him the courage to continue.

Steve remembered guy in particular that said, “I hope we don’t scare you too much!” then laughed and Steve realized the man probably didn’t care if he did. About half of the groups would have fit into any social gathering at college but quite a few were dressed in a way that would have given the gossips back home weeks of material. He thought one guy might be going through hormone therapy or else had the worst case of bitch tits Steve had ever seen.

When they got to the store his aunt said, “That wasn’t so bad was it?”

Steve admitted, “It was scary at first but by the end I was almost having fun. You have a way with people.”

Aunt Marjorie smiled.

As they browsed the store Marj continued the conversation, “You are at an interesting crossroads in your life Steve and I’ve found there’s nothing sadder than someone hiding who they really are. As you can tell that isn’t much of a problem in this neighborhood. I know that walk was a little more intense than I said but I knew you could handle it. I promise not to put you into any situations like that the rest of the week unless you ask. I just wanted to make sure you didn’t spend your days sitting in my house. You should feel free to go anywhere in this neighborhood without fear. You always have to be careful at night right especially after the bars close as there always seems to be some idiot driving through to make trouble. The police chase them off pretty quick so even then it’s really pretty safe.”

Marjorie paid the cashier and again they walked down the street meeting groups along the way. Marjorie stopped at each one and it amazed Steve to note that she seemed to know everyone by name.

As they passed the last group Aunt Marj asked, “Did you notice that no one said anything to you? I’m sure most of them knew the truth as you didn’t bother to change your voice but they didn’t care. I'm sure you will be the hot topic on the gossip lists tonight. This place is probably as bad as our hometown in that regard. The difference is that they want to know more about you and I’m sure a few might want to ask you out.”

Steve gave his aunt a grimace.

She laughed, “Would you rather be home this week?”

Steve smiled. “You have a point.”

As they entered the house his aunt told Steve, “I want to finish our talk upstairs in my office while we wait for your cousin to get home. Is that ok?” Steve nodded.

Steve followed her up the steps and into a room littered with stacks of paper and a wall shelves filled to with books. Only the desk was clear and Steve sat in a chair across from his aunt.

Steve said, “I do want to thank you for pushing me Aunt Marj. I couldn’t have done that on my own. I can’t imagine ever doing that at school.”

“You could if you wanted. I’ve found most people don’t care and the key is to know what to avoid. For instance Sandy told me she took you to a bar and you talked to some drunk guys….”

Steve interrupted, “…She did most of the talking”

“I believe that but the thing is you were smart to get out of there. It was incredibly stupid to go to that bar as drunk guys and bars are near the top of the list to avoid. I know a full post-op transsexual that no one would pick to be chromosomally male but some guys heard a rumor and they beat her senseless. It doesn’t make any sense but it’s something you have to consider.”

“My therapist would be happy just knowing I’m outside. She’s been worried that I’ve been hiding this.”

“I'm glad to hear you are seeing a therapist. They are expensive but for someone in our position they can be a literal lifesaver. I’m sure you’ve thought about suicide.”

The sudden turn in the conversation took Steve off guard. “What do you mean?”

“Killing yourself.”

“No. I…”

“I told you this is an honesty holiday. There’s really no reason to lie to me. I’ve really heard it all. I’ve worked wth hundreds of kids in similar situations and it always at least crosses their mind.”

“Well I, umm… yeah. A little bit.”

His aunt laughed. “Just a little bit huh. Well I guess you would have only been a little bit dead”, and then she laughed again. Steve looked at her with a cross look. “I’m sorry Steve … or should I say Sara? … I’m not making light of the situation but here’s the thing and it can be just between you and me. I know there’s a part of you right now that wants to die. It might not be a big part but it’s on your list of options. I’m sorry I wasn’t around to help you in the past but now that I know I will do anything to help you. Life is never perfect, but it does get better.”

Steve smirked, “There’s that stupid line. My therapist keeps saying that too. I’ve read the brochures. It just doesn’t feel possible right now.”

“It may be cliché but I can tell you from personal experience that it does. I probably felt like you do now when I left your uncle Sal. In fact it might have been worse since I had Sandy to worry about.”

“I never knew why you left until Sandy told me.”

Aunt Marj's face looked a little sad as she answered, “It took me a long time to forgive myself for uprooting Sandy and taking her away from the family. Did you know your grandmother tried to get custody? I was fortunate that the courts felt strong that a child should stay with the mother but that didn’t help my guilt. Sal didn't want to move and I got sole custody.”

Steve interrupted, “I like Uncle Sal.”

“I do too and that made it even worse. He's been great and a lot more understanding than most would be under the circumstances. After all, I left him to be with other women and took his daughter hours away. It wasn’t until a few years later when I met Kristy that I finally began to forgive myself. She helped me understand that making myself miserable in an attempt to make others happy would have only made the situation worse. You have to live for yourself Steve. It has helped to see that Sandy has turned out so great but don’t tell her that. She’s inherited my narcissism and would never let me live it down.”

“Oh don’t worry about that.” Steve said

“So Steve… dammit.. Sara. Which do you prefer?”

“It’s ok. You can call me Steve. The name Sara actually feels weird.”

“It’s really not ok. You said you read all the brochures. Words are important. I know you are having trouble coming to terms with how you view yourself but I think it is important that you insist that others view you as you see yourself. If you want to be Sara for the next two weeks, then you should insist that everyone call you Sara. If you see yourself as Steve in women’s clothing , that’s fine too. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah. It does.”

“I know it’s tough but there’s no magic pill that will make you stop cross-dressing. If it’s part of who you are then you need to figure out what it means.”

“I know it just feels weird to call myself Sara all the time.”

“Well we can call you Steve if you’d like but let me ask you something. You’ve been Steve hiding in your apartment all semester. How’d that make you feel?”

“Not good.”

“So why not be Sara for two weeks? Why not figure out if you like Sara?”

“People will laugh.”

“No one laughed in the street.”

“Sandy might.”

“I really hope I’ve raised her better than that but frankly so what if she does? The important thing is you need to be rock solid sure who you are because once you figure that out you can easily handle the laughs. I know from personal experience.”

Steve started to ask something then stopped. “I have a question ...”

“Go ahead.”

Steve thought for a moment then said, “Well, it’s about sexual orientation.” Marj nodded but didn't respond.

“I swear to you that I’ve never had a gay thought in my life and in fact at one point I was borderline homophobic but recently I’ve been having these random thoughts that are scaring me.”

Aunt Marjorie smiled, “Are you getting interested in guys?”

“That’s the thing. I’ve always had a strong attraction to girls but never committed to any of them. In the last year things have started to change. For example if I see a picture with a hot guy and hot girl, I might notice that the guy’s abs instead of the woman’s breasts. This week I even had a gay dream. My friend Tim told me that’s how he knew he was gay – when he started have dreams of sex with men.”

“Well dreams are an insight into your subconscious but they can be tough to interpret. One gay dream doesn’t make you gay.”

“But I’m thinking that maybe I’m gay and the cross-dressing is just a way for my brain to get me to admit it.”

“You said you read all the books so you need to remember that sexual orientation and sexual identity are two separate things. I’m not saying it isn’t possible but typically people cross-dress because they like to cross-dress or feel they are a woman and men are gay because they like other men. It’s two separate things but I’d really encourage you to look into it if you are really unsure.”

“Wh… huh?”

“Date a few guys.”

“Really? Just go out on a date with a guy?”

“How else are you going to know for sure? You are at a great age for experimentation if you don’t bog yourself down in the mental aspect of … ‘Oh my god am I gay? My life is ruined if I am’.”

“That makes sense but it kind of freaks me out. I mean why do you think I just started having these feelings?”

“I’m not sure but if I had to guess I’d say the Steve part of you is a closeted heterosexual and Sara is probably bisexual. ”

“Huh?”

“I lived right up the road from your house for most of my life. I know how that town can be. Why do you think it took me until I was thirty years old to figure out I was a lesbian? My guess is the Sara side of your personality never had a change to emerge because Steve wouldn’t let her. The reason you’ve had such a hard time with relationships is you weren’t fully engaged so eventually you got bored.”

“Are you saying I’ve got a split personality?”

“Not at all. First, I’m only giving you my opinion based on my experience and you definitely should talk to your therapist. It just makes sense to me that if you’ve never had gay thoughts, then you start cross-dressing and suddenly have gay thoughts that the two are related. Are you still having erotic dreams about women?”

“Sometimes but I’ve never really had a lot of dreams like that.”

“But more than dreams about men?”

“Yeah but it bothers me when I see a television show and I see a guy and my first thought is – ‘He’s hot.”

Marjorie laughed, “I notice hot guys too but that doesn’t mean I want to sleep with them. The next few months should be interesting for you. I really encourage you to spread your wings a little but make sure you use protection.”

Steve squirmed in his chair, “OK, now this conversation is getting uncomfortable.”

Marjorie smiled, “You brought it up.”

Marjorie looked at her watch. “I’m sure your cousin has arrived so should head downstairs. Decision time - I need an answer and there’s no changing it for the rest of holiday. Steve or Sara?”

Steve thought it over then answered, “Sara.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

“OK Sara, I have a few last things to say. First I love you and I’m proud of you. Second, I’m really glad we had this talk and hope you know you can call me any time to talk. Third, if you need to talk to someone and you don’t call me I’m going to be pissed. Are we clear?”

“Yes .”

“Good.”

“Thanks Aunt Marjorie.”

“You’re welcome. Now let’s go get something to eat.”

Steve heard Sandy talking before he saw her and as they came down the stairs he saw her sitting at the kitchen table with her arms crossed. “It’s about time!”

Marjorie ignored her and said, “Aren’t you going to say hi to your cousin Sara?”

Sandy looked confused for a moment then said in a monotone, “Hello cousin Sara.” Followed immediately by, “Now can we fucking eat? I'm starving!”

Marjorie shouted back, “Hey watch your language young lady!” but she was smiling.

Chapter 15

Steve woke early the next morning and took a long hot shower. As he dressed, he decided to wear the blue outfit Sandy bought and spent a little extra time on his makeup so that it was as perfect as his skills would allow. When he finished, attempted to on the barrette his aunt had given him with a decent result. Kristy was in the kitchen making breakfast when he went downstairs.

He sat at the table and picked up the paper, “Good morning.”

Kristy looked up when he sat. “I didn’t hear you come downstairs Sara. You are up early today.”

It took a moment for Steve to realize she was talking to him, “Yeah I couldn’t sleep. My mind was racing all night.”

“Margorie can have that effect on people.”

“She said the same thing about you.”

“I’m sure that’s true. The hardest part of being …” Kristy paused a moment as if trying to figure the correct word then continued, “The hardest part of being different is trying to find your place in the world.” She sat a plate of pancakes on the table and Steve grabbed two of them with a fork.

“Marg and I probably saved each other. It’s only been six years but my life is a lot better than it was. I’m sure your aunt would tell you the same thing. Did she mention she’s on the city council?”

“Really?”

“Figures. A few years ago this area had grown enough that a bunch of us decided we wanted to get our own candidate elected to city hall. Marj has always been the neighborhood mom and the overwhelming choice.”

“I had no idea.” That explained a lot about the reaction from the people on their walk.

“That doesn’t surprise me. She’s still embarrassed about it which I find really. It’s like she doesn’t believe she’s the right person for the job. The first election was nasty with lots of homophobic campaigning but in the end we’d grown too large and even our worst critics could see the improvements we were making to one of the worst areas in town. Margie won the first election by a few hundred votes.”

“That's when things really got better around here. With her help we encouraged the worst elements to move but somehow housing prices still dropped. It's amazing to think how many residents were perfectly fine living in a neighborhood with drug dealers but being in the 'gay district' was just too much. In the end I think even the most bigoted city leaders are happy with the current situation. We mostly keep to this neighborhood, pay our taxes into the city’s coffers and in return Marjorie makes sure they keep the streets safe. They’ve even been pretty accommodating with some of Marj’s special projects we have most of the city's halfway houses in the neighborhood. It’s been great for me as I quit my job and now work with troubled teens. Sandy spent her summers interning there which is why I think she's gone into nursing. You could say we are all pretty blessed.”

Steve couldn't believe no one had ever told him about this but he also knew when he was being manipulated. “That sounds great Kristy but I get the feeling are you telling me that long story to make me feel better.”

Kristy smiled, “You caught that? Sandy didn’t tell me much but I wanted you to know that I'm quite familiar just how difficult it can be for someone in your situation. I deal with kids that are trying to cope every day and have found the key is giving them space to figure out who they are and support them any way I can. It doesn’t always work but I wouldn’t trade it for any other job in the world.” Kristy stopped for a moment. “It’s certainly better than typing another memo to upper management.”

Steve heard someone coming down the stairs and saw his cousin walk into the kitchen with her eyes half closed, “You might want to slow down on those pancakes or you won’t fit into that dress.”

Kristy threw a few more pancakes on Steve’s plate. “Sara's looking too thin in my opinion. Nothing wrong with a few extra pounds,” Kristy patted her belly.

Steve watched as Sandy exaggerated her walk as she walked down the remaining stairs. “That’s easy for you to say you aren’t on the market any longer. Us single girls have to watch our figures.”

The conversation was making Steve feel uncomfortable and while Kristy shook her head, Steve decided to put his fork into another pancake, smother it with syrup and then stuffed half of it into his mouth.

Sandy said, “You pig.”

Steve did the same thing with the rest of his pancake.

“You know that’s not very lady like.”

A voice came from the top of the stairs, “Oh like you’d know”. Marjorie entered the room dressed in a business suit with a briefcase in her right hand.

Kristy asked, “You going in today?”

“Yeah. The offices are empty so it’s a great time to catch up on paperwork. I assume you will be at the Canaday House all day?”

Yeah I’m working until 6pm tonight though I may stay later. You know how tough this time of year can be.”

“I may stop by when I’m done,” she kissed Kristy on the cheek as she walked out the door. From the garage Steve heard a distant, “And you two try to stay out of trouble!” He heard a car door open and the sound of an engine driving away.

Sandy looked at Steve, “It’s party time!” Kristy shook her head. Steve had a feeling that happened a lot in this house.

Steve said, “It’s a bit early to party don’t you think.”

Sandy gave a mischievous smile, “I have a party of a different sort planned for you.”

Steve looked to Kristy for help but only received a similar smile in return which made Steve feel like he missed the punch line of a joke.

Sandy said, “Mom gave me her credit card so give me 5 minutes and we are going shopping!”

Steve groaned. He'd already experienced on of Sandy's fun days and could only imagine what she had in store this time.

Twenty minutes later Sandy bounded down the steps. “I’m ready. It’s time to shop!”

Before Steve could think of a good objection, they were in Sandy’s car. Five minutes later, the car pulled to a stop in front a place with sign that read, “Vivica’s”.

“What's this?”

Sandy laughed, “You’ll see.”

“I’m serious. What is this?”

“St…err dammit Sara, you have to trust me. These people are my friends. If you feel uncomfortable, we can leave but Viv is great. You’ll see.”

Steve surrendered, “Oh all right.”

Steve walked into the shop and watched as a dozen faces turned to look at him. A lady behind the counter ran to Sandy waving her arms and shouting, “Sandy’s home!”

Sandy looked about as flustered as Steve had ever seen her, “Viv, stop acting like I don’t stop by every few weeks to get my hair cut.”

“Oh I know honey but you are home for a while so we can go out! I … can’t … wait! Oh and is this the little friend? What’s her name? Oh let me guess … it’s Sara isn’t it.”

Steve was looking at the floor as the stares from the other patrons got to be too much. Sandy smiled and said, “I see the rumor mill is still working overtime on the block.”

Vivica answered, “Oh you know. People just love to tell stories to their hairdresser. I just put two and two together.”

Steve was praying that a meteoroid would hit Vivica’s place at that moment. Vivica's conversation had everyone in the shop interested in the strange person that entered with Sandy. Vivica said in a voice louder than Steve would have preferred “Sandy says you are getting the works so we should go into my office and do some planning.” Steve nodded in appreciation as he felt desperate to escape the dozen pair of eyes that seemed to follow his every move.

Viv closed the door behind them. “Take a seat. Do you talk Sara?”

Steve nodded then said, “Yeah.”

“Good to know. So tell me what you want?”

Steve met Vivica's intense stare, “What do you mean?”

“Well Sandy told me you wanted a total makeover and frankly I can’t blame you with that mop of a haircut.”

“She told you I wanted a total makeover? Did she tell you anything else?”

“If you are talking about the fact you are male no but that was easy enough to figure out. I know a fellow ladyboy when I see one.” As Vivica said the last part she lowered her voice.

“You are….?”

“Me? I’m not sure there’s a proper term for me. Fabulous, definitely. Old school people would call me a transvestite but I guess the proper term is that I’m a cross-dresser but it seems too bland a word to describe all of this. ”

Steve watched as Vivica made a sweeping gesture with her hand while pointing at her self. This woman … err man … well whatever this hairdresser was … made him feel at ease. Steve asked, “You aren’t taking hormones or you know….?” Steve made a cutting motion with his index and middle finger.

“Oh dear no. Do you know how much tail I get in this outfit? I just like dressing up in women’s clothes. I think it helps with the business too.”

Steve thought silent but didn’t say anything. He looked at Sandy but for once she remained quiet. Steve asked, “So what now?”

“It depends on what you want.”

“I don’t want anything.”

Steve heard Sandy start to speak but saw Vivica wave her off. “How long have you been cross-dressing?”

“About 6 months.”

“And you’ve been wearing wigs during that time?”

“A few but not many. I’ve mostly just pulled my hair back into a pony tail.”

“Let your hair down. I want to see how long it is.”

Steve pulled out the barrette that was holding his hair in place and his hair fell down over his face and well past his ears.

“Oh wow. Most of my clients would kill to have hair grown out like that. I know I could do a lot of amazing things with that.”

“But I don’t want to cut my hair.”

Sandy started to speak again but Vivava waved her off again. “Why not?”

“Well because at school I’m only dressed like this in private. I still can’t believe I’m doing it here.”

Vivica said, “Oh honey most people don’t even pay attention. And I should know because I try to go out of my way to be noticed.”

“I just can’t.”

“I understand honey. We can work around it and I have a few ideas. Stand still and let me take a few pictures of your face. I need you to pull your hair back away from your face so I can get a good picture.”

Steve pulled his hair back into his normal pony tail and Vivica said, “Now give me a big smile!”

Vivica took a few pictures with her camera and loaded them into her computer. “I don’t know what I did before I got this program. Makeovers are so much more fun with this.”

Steve looked on the screen and saw his face with long blonde curly hair. Sandy squealed, “I like it!” but Steve shook his head no.

Vivica said, “I agree that is a bit much for your first time. How about this?” and showed him the same image only as a red head.

“I’m not coloring my hair. I don’t even want to cut it.”

Sandy said, “Spoil sport.”

Vivica added, “I was just teasing you with those. I’m assuming your current look is how you wear your hair at school so why don’t we look at styles that will allow you to pull it back like you have it now but cut so that when you let it fall it looks more feminine.”

“I guess I could live with that.”

“How about something like this?” Steve looked at image on the screen. The hair was a bob with a part on the left and just over the ears on both sides and cut the same length in the back. “This is a basic cut that you should be able to pull off either way. At school all you’d need to do is pull your hair behind your ears with a bandana or an elastic.”

“Would I need to cut so much off? I’ve been growing this out for about 3 years now and I really don’t want to cut it that short.”

“We definitely need to even it out but how about something like this?” She showed him a similar hairstyle but cut at shoulder length.

“It just took so long to grow.”

“You really are attached to your long hair. Well how about this.” This time the part was on the side with hair past the shoulders in the front and shorter in the back.

“I don’t know.”

“I think you’ll look good in this. I can add a few layers and waves to make it look fuller but you need to cut off some length. It would be easy to pull this style back into a ponytail and no one would notice it looked feminine unless you put it down. You really need to do something. It’s too long for you right now and I hate to be brutal but it’s not a good look for either sex.”

Steve looked at the different images on the screen. It all looked so much different but he looked in the mirror and he knew they were right. He had to cut his hair.

“I could live with that one.” Steve pointed to the last image that Vivica described.

She beamed, “I think I like that one best too but I have one alteration and I need you to keep an open mind.” She tapped a few keys on the keyboard and turned the screen to Steve. The hair color was now a reddish brown.

“I’m not coloring my hair.”

“I’m not saying we go all out but how about using a temporary hair color. It should last about 2 weeks and it should be gone before you go back to school. I really hope you consider it because this really complements your complexion and I want to do it.”

Sandy chimed in, “Come on. Think about what Sara would do.”

Steve replied, “That Sara excuse is getting old but I submit. I’m at your mercy Vivica.”

Vivica smiled at Steve, “Call me Viv. Everyone else does.”

They walked to Vivica's styling station and she got to work. She was like a machine and Steve tried not to watch as he felt years of hair growth fall to the floor. Sandy disappeared when Vivica started applying the gels to color his hair. He closed his eyes as the dye rinsed out and kept them closed as Vivica put the final changes. After that it was off to the hair dryer and once it finished, Vivica made a few final adjustments then turned him to face the mirror.

Steve didn’t recognize himself. He knew his parents would freak if they ever saw his hair like this. He felt panicked but calmed himself with the thought that he could just cut it even shorter before he saw them. That would make his dad happy.

As these thoughts rushed through his head, Vivica showed Steve how to style it using a straight iron to curl by pulling it over his ears and flipping it underneath in the back. Steve was trying to decide if he liked it when Sandy walked back in.

She screamed, “Ohmygod Viv you’ve outdone yourself! I love it!”

Vivica replied, “It really turned out great. I hope you like it Sara. It suits you.”

Steve just stared, “I don’t know. It’s just so different.”

Sandy didn’t miss a beat, “Trust me S ... Sara. It’s perfect. Now get out of that chair, it’s my turn and you need to go see Rachel in the next room. She’s waiting for you.”

Steve got out of the chair and turned his head from side to side. His hair flowed back and forth like he’d seen on the TV commercials. It had never done that before and the sight made him smile.

Sandy whispered to Vivica in a voice that was loud enough for Steve to hear, “I think he likes it too. He just won't admit it.”

It wouldn’t do any good to argue and perhaps the style would grow on him. He didn’t say a word and went to the next room. When he got there, a petite blonde with a Southern drawl greeted him.

“Hey Honey. You must be Sara. You ready for your mani/pedi?”

Steve laughed, “OK sure. I’m game.”

“Put your hands and feet into the solution while we talk about what you want.”

Steve gave her a confused look but complied then said, “This is my first time so I’m not really sure what you mean.”

“Well, I’m going to clean your hands and feet then shape your nails however you want. I guess my first question is for your nails are you looking for just a clear coat, a specific finger nail polish or something more complex.”

Steve thought about it for a second. He’d been wearing false nails on the weekends for months and the idea of something a bit more permanent always intrigued him. He'd tried to use one of those home acrylic kits on himself with the predictable disastrous results.

“Well. What if I wanted something more complex but wasn’t sure if it was something I wanted to keep. I guess what I’m saying is how hard are acrylic nail to take off if I don’t like them? Am I stuck with them for months?”

Rachel shook her head, “They aren’t permanent but they aren’t easy to remove either. If you aren’t sure I’d recommend you go with gel or just a nice nail polish. Both of those can be removed at home with nail polish remover and less harmful to your nail bed.” Rachel held up her hand. “This is what gels look like.”

“I know I don’t want nail polish but I do like your nails. Can you do that for me?”

“Certainly. Toenails too?”

“Why not?”

“OK here’s the big question. Do you want extensions?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never really had nails before.”

“Well then I should make them just past the end of your fingertips.”

Something in Steve's brain shouted in protest. “Don’t make them too short. I may never do this again and I want to know how it feels to have long nails.”

“OK. I’ll get started.”

Steve watched as over the next half hour, Rachel cleaned, polished, attached tips, and gel to his fingers. He could barely believe this was happening. After he put his hands under the UV light, Rachel started on his feet. Steve kept looking at the clear hard color that coated his nails. When the timer went off, Rachel cleaned each nail a final time.

“Done!”

Steve closed his fist to feel the nails dig into his skin then opened them.

Rachel asked, “Do you like them?”

“More than I thought I would. They’re amazing.”

When Rachel finished his pedicure, Steve didn’t think his feet had ever been so clean. He kept wiggling his toes and got a few frustrated looks from Rachel. After a few delays she finished.

“All done.”

Steve looked at his feet.

“What do you think?”

Steve couldn’t think of any words so he just hugged her.

Rachel laughed. “I’m going to assume that means you like them.”

Steve gave a furious nod as he left then hid his hands as he went into the next room where he found Sandy sitting under the dryer. She shouted over the sound, “How’d you like the mani-pedi?” Steve showed her his hands and she screamed, “Holy shit Viv! Look at this!”

Everyone in the room turned to look at Steve again and he felt self conscous all over. He saw lots of smiles and a few snickers but he tried to ignore them as he looked at the reflection in the mirror and watched as the stranger smiled at the sight of his new long fingernails with red polish and hair to match.

Steve watched as Vivica worked on styling Sandy's hair. He started to pull up a chair but Sandy stopped him. “You have another appointment. It won’t be fun but it is part of the package and you really need to do it.”

As Steve tried to imagine what Sandy had in mind next she meant she shouted in a voice loud enough for the whole room to hear. “Let the waxing beging!”

Waxing? “I don’t know Sandy. Isn’t that too much?”

Vivica backed her up, “You have to do it. You’ve gone this far, it would be a shame to stop now. It's part of the package.”

Steve shrugged. He could kill his cousin later.

Vivica pressed a button on her booth and asked, “Is Suzy ready for Sara?”

A few mintues later an older woman entered the room.

“Sara?”

Steve followed her into another set of adjacent rooms and then into a private room. “Strip down and put this on.”

She threw him a robe. Steve felt uncomfortable as he considered his anatomy. “Um, Suzy? You should probably know that I’m not a girl.” Suzy gave him a knowing smile, “Go ahead and change and lie face down on the table.”

It wasn't long after that he felt the warmth as Suzy started the process. Steve had shaved his chest and legs in the past but had never used wax. He had heard it did a much better job of hair removal but he'd never tried it. Women always complained about the pain but he’d always had a high pain tolerance. At least he thought he had a high pain tolerance. Fifteen minutes later he changed his mind as tears streamed down his face and had collected a pile of tissues covered in mascara. He'd never been tortured in his life but at that moment he wondered if waterboarding might be preferable.

Suzy ripped the wax off one last time as Steve bit his lip. She said, “That wasn’t so bad was it?”

Steve didn’t respond and it was everything he could do not to scream. Suzy applied lotion all over his body. “That should make it feel better but it will feel raw for a while. Make sure you moisturize the next few days but it should feel better in a day.”

Steve couldn’t think of anything else to say. “Thanks?” Suzy didn't respond so he went back to the main room.

As he entered spontaneous laughter erupted. He knew his tear stained cheeks had to be a sight and noticed one lady that he had paid an hour earlier still sitting in the waiting area. She shouted at him, “You never forget your first waxing dear”. The comment only made the room laugh a little harder.

Steve knew his face was now a deep crimson but felt a little better when he got to Vivica’s station. She said, “Don’t mind them. You are now part of the sisterhood.” Steve gave a helpless look at Sandy who gave a shrug in response.

Vivica said, “OK normally we’d send you off to get a spray tan but that needs to wait a few days since you just did a waxing.” Steve must have looked confused look on his face as she explained, “The tanning chemicals sometimes don’t react well with irritated skin from a waxing so we usually wait 2 days after a waxing to do a spray tan.” Steve felt let down. After everything else he would have loved to get a little color too.

“So what’s next?”

Vivica replied, “The best part. I’m going to have a professional makeup artist give you a makeover and since Sandy has told me just how bad you are at it we will give you some tips on color matching and best color schemes for your face and complexion.”

“I’m not that bad. She caught me on a bad day.” Vivica and Sandy nodded at each other and Steve knew they didn’t believe a word. He put his up hand up, “Believe whatever you wish.”

He was soon in another part of the building where a makeup artist named Tammy washed all the makeup off his face he'd spent so much time applying that morning. She walked him through a list of makeup recommendation she thought would suit him then started with base then added covering crèmes then added false lashes, eyeshadow, and mascara. When she finished, she added a much brighter red color of lipstick than he’d dared to use in the past. When he complained Suzy explained his new reddish-brown hair offset the bright color and combined with her other recommendations created a look that most women would kill to achieve. The more he stared at himself in the mirror the more he had to agree. Tammy was good. He knew he wasn't as good at makeup as Sandy but Sandy was an amateur compared to Tammy. A virtual stranger looked back from the mirror in a now complete image.

One thought repeated in his mind, “Hi Sara, it’s nice to meet you.”

Steve closed his eyes and felt the warmth of the moment as it overloaded his senses. As he waited, Tammy restyled his hair and gave her best effort to fix up his mussed outfit. He wondered why she was taking so much care but it came clear when he returned to the other room to a standing room only crowd. It seemed everyone waited to see the final product as even more people were crowded into the small room. He couldn't think of any other idea so he gave them a smile and took a bow as the group clapped.

Vivica's voice cut through the noise, “Show us your catwalk strut!”

The audience seemed to like this idea and while Steve tried to ignore it, the chants started until he did his best impersonation of a runway model. Steve knew it looked stupid but he didn't care and neither did the crowd. Steve saw Sandy sitting in a nearby drying chair clapping as loud as anyone.

Vivica shouted over the crowd, “OK, the show’s over. Now get back to work,”

Steve stood on the sidewalk for a few seconds to catch his breath. It seemed like a lifetime ago that he’d entered into Vivica’s studio. He pulled his watch from his purse. It was almost 3:30.

Sandy came outside a few minutes later with Vivica close behind. Steve said, “I can’t believe we were in there for over 5 hours.”

Sandy replied, “Time flies when you are having fun but we have to hurry to make the next stop. Vivica has a good idea.”

Steve worried, “Why do I have a feeling I’m going to hate this?”

Vivica soothed him, “Oh believe me you are going to love this. We are going to my favorite store.”

Sandy followed Vivica’s minivan down the side streets of the Village and pulled up to a store in a mini mall with the innocuous sounding name “Transitions”. From the street it appeared to be a wig shop as that’s all you could see in the window. Steve knew it was more when he saw Vivica get a big hug by the lady Steve assumed was the owner. “Sara, I’d like you to meet Tina. She runs this shop.”

Steve saw rows of different types of clothing along with countless other items. “What exactly is this place?”

Vivica smiled and said, “Welcome to my second home.”

Tina laughed, “This store is primarily a wig shop but also caters to the cross-dressing community. We have almost anything an aspiring cross-dresser would need and if we don’t have it … we can get it.”

Steve said, “I buy most of my stuff online. I didn’t know a shop like this even existed.”

Tina replied, “You’ve done a good job in your selections. I like your outfit.”

“I take little credit for how I look. I’ve had lots of help.”

Sandy added, “Trust him … dammit … trust her on that one.”

“Well it sounds like you are in good hands. How can I help?”

Steve stared blankly. “I don’t know. I didn’t even know this place existed until 5 minutes ago.”

“Well let me think. I see you have plenty of clothes though we have many things that will fit a man’s figure if you are interested. One thing I might suggest is this CD which gives you vocal exercises to help develop your feminine voice. I used it myself.”

“You’re a cross-dresser too? I honestly would have never guessed.”

“That’s mostly because you don’t know what to look for but most people don’t. And technically I’m not a cross-dresser, I’m transgendered.”

Steve raised his eyebrows, “Oh. Sorry, I didn't know. I thought you were a genetic girl when I first came in.”

Tina smiled, “I take that as a complement. It’s been almost 10 years ago that I started my hormone replacement. My friends and family couldn't accept the real me so I moved here and set up this business about the same time Sandy's mom and her friends started their little project.”

Vivica added, “She’s been a vital part of the community ever since.

“Not that vital but I definitely enjoy my job.”

Steve looked around the shop and saw Sandy near the counter looking at some of the display items. She looked back and said, “How much are these?”

Everyone walked over to where Sandy was standing and Steve saw she was pointing to a box with a label he was too far away to read.

“It really depends on the quality you want/need. You don't have breast forms?”

Steve shook his head at the thought, “Um no. I have a few padded bra’s though.”

Vivica shook her head, “Oh dear that will never do. Nothing beats the real thing but I love my breast forms. Nothing makes me feel more feminine.”

Steve shook his head, “Really? I don’t know. It seems silly to me. I mean I already have the appearance.”

Vivica responded, “Sara, you should know by now that it isn’t about what other people see. It’s about what you feel. I don’t think I could get into character without my breasts.”

Tina added, “Why don’t you try on a pair? You will see what we mean.”

Steve raised his hands in surrender.

Tina asked, “So I guess the first question is just how big do you want to be?”

Steve responded, “DD?”

Vivica laughed, “That might work for me when I’m on stage but if you want to pass I recommend a nice B or C cup. You will find they are plenty big. Keep in mind that the bigger the breast size the more guys will notice you and if they notice you they might notice that not everything is as it seems.”

Steve looked at Tina who nodded. She pulled out a tape measure and measured around Steve’s chest just under his nipples. “38 inches for what it is worth.”

Steve replied, “Bring me out a set of C cups.” Tina said, “How about a bring out a few different ones. There’s a big difference between some of the forms.”

Steve realized that Tina wasn’t kidding. She put 2 of her more popular styles in front of him and the cheapest was literally molded silicon that looked like a breast. The other model was made of some non-descript material that Steve would have sworn was a breast by touch if he wasn’t looking at it. It even came with some sort of medical adhesive to attach them right to your chest or you could use a special bra to keep them in place.

He pointed to the second one and said, “This one seems nice. How much?”

Steve saw Sandy waving her hands then she said, “It’s an early Christmas present.”

Tina tossed him two bra’s and another breast form, “We’ll figure it out later. Go try them on. The other box is B size just so you can compare.”

Steve went into the dressing room and pulled off his top but didn’t take off his bra. He’d never really thought much about it in the past but looking at himself in the mirror he guessed he looked like an A cup with the padded bra. He opened the C cup box and placed the form underneath his A cup bra. It looked a bit silly as the form stretched out his bra. Then he put the B cup form on the other side and looked in the mirror and pulled his blouse over top of himself and walked outside.

Sandy saw him exit first and laughed, “You look a little lopsided Sara.”

“I was tried to get an idea of the difference in size.”

Tina said, “In actuality there isn’t a lot of difference but it doesn’t take much to get a guys attention. I guess the question depends on the look you are trying to achieve. Are you going for feminine or sexy?”

“See that’s the thing. The guy in me likes the C Cup but I see what you mean. I guess I will go with the B cup.”

“Why don’t you go put that on then and come back out.”

A few minutes later Steve walked back out only now in proportion.

Tina pointed, “Look at yourself in the 3 way mirror.”

Steve looked and Tina was right. This was still feminine and as he flexed his knees he felt the heft of the new weight on his chest. “I really like these. I can even feel a bit of the weight on my back and shoulders.”

Sandy laughed, “And now you know why we girls wear bra’s. Just wait until you’ve been standing waiting on tables for hours and the bra straps are digging into your shoulders.”

Steve smiled, “Well not all of us are as well-endowed as you” then laughed at himself as he realized that Sandy was the only genetic female in the room. “How big are you anyway?”

“That’s a bit personal but I’m 36D if you must know. Honestly it’s a bit of a burden if you want to know the truth but I’m sure I get bigger tips at the restaurant because of them.”

Steve realized he was staring at his cousin’s breasts and also realized she was probably getting a bit uncomfortable. Sandy turned away and said to Tina, “We will take them and that CD. Anything else Sara?”

Steve was lost in thought, ’”No but I have a feeling I might be back. Can I wear these out?”

Tina replied, “I’d be disappointed if you didn’t. Have fun with your new purchase.”

Vivica, Sandy and Steve left the store. Before getting in her car Sandy hugged Vivica.

“Thanks for helping out. I’ll call you later this week and we will go out.”

“You’d better.” Vivica turned to Steve and hugged him, “Stay strong and let me know if you need my help. I’m just a phone call away.” She handed him her business card. “My cell phone number is on that card.”

“Thanks Vivica. I appreciate everything you did today.”

“It was my pleasure Sara. See you later.”

Steve was lost in thought as he got in to the car and realized after a while that they hadn't moved. Sandy was looking at him with tears streamed down her face.

“Tears? Really Sandy?”

“Oh dammit Steve and yes I said Steve because I’m talking to my male cousin who I've watched become Sara in front of my eyes today. I honestly don’t know what else to say but dude you rock. I can’t believe you did all that today. And look at your hair. I fucking love it.!” Sandy screamed. “I was worried all last night but mom said she thought you’d be fine. Then you go and get your fucking nails done too! Just freaking amazing.”

“That might have been a mistake. I can barely even open my purse with these claws.”

“You get used to it but that’s not what I mean. You did it without me or Viv conspiring to prompt you.”

“Don’t give me too much credit. You are talking to someone that has been dressing as a woman continuously for months and professionally done nails have been a dream. You made that possible today. I gotta say Sandy that you are still a pain in the ass but it’s worth it.” He gave her a smile so she knew he was teasing.

Sandy replied, “Damn, we really are a bunch of saps?” She lit a cigarette. Steve grabbed one too and they sat in silence. Sandy stubbed hers out, “I really needed that. Mom doesn’t know I smoke and she knows everyone in the neighborhood so I can’t smoke as much when I’m at home. Spending all day at Viv’s almost killed me.”

Steve raised his eyes. “Your mom doesn’t know you smoke? I told her I did last night.”

“Oh shit.”

“It sounds like someone has a little coming out of their own to do.” Steve laughed and Sandy said, “You bitch!”

Steve just continued to laugh as Sandy started the car and they drove away.