Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 2574

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The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike, est. 2007)
Part 2574
by Angharad

Copyright© 2015 Angharad

  
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This is a work of fiction any mention of real people, places or institutions is purely coincidental and does not imply that they are as suggested in the story.
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“The police are investigating Gasgoine’s death,” said James the next morning.

“Is this just pressure from the Echo or is there something to investigate?”

“I don’t know yet.”

“Do keep me informed.”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Any other interesting gossip?”

“No, but I’ve worked out what I was doing when I was stabbed.”

“And?”

“I’ll tell you when I see you.”

“I take it that it has no bearing on anything I asked you to look at?”

“Wait and see.”

“That’s tantamount to insubordination.”

“So?”

“Remember I’m eccentric aristocrat and might forget to pay you.”

“I know what an aristocrat is, I’ve shot one or two of them, albeit not British ones.”

“That is so reassuring.”

“I was going to add, yet.”

“Well then, mister, next time Trish smacks you in the goolies, I won’t pull her off you, I’ll just let her continue.”

“Hey, that’s not fair.”

“Life isn’t, I’m afraid.”

I listened to the radio while I had my breakfast and was pleased to hear a colleague on the Today programme. Apparently engineers from Portsmouth University have shown that limpet’s teeth are the strongest biological substance, being even stronger than spider silk. Does that mean we should feel sympathy for a limpet’s dentist?

They can eat rock. So do some parrot fish and the odd spaniel. Ours is very odd and eats all sorts of strange things including sheep poo. She doesn’t really eat rock just swallows the occasional stone—stupid dog. The cat still terrifies her, lying in wait and ambushing her as she walks past. It’s quite funny to watch, something quarter the size chasing the dog round the house or garden.

Talking of rocks, it seems someone identified what had previously been seen as a plaster copy of some sort of ichthyosaur is actually a real fossil from the Jurassic coast just along in Dorset, which was gathering dust in Doncaster museum until a young palaeontologist examined it and realised what it was. Apparently they could even see it had been eating squid before it died. And, Trish just informed me that a star floated through the solar system or just outside it very recently.

“Gosh, when was that?” I asked impressed by her braininess.

“70,000 years ago, did Gramps see it?”

“If he did he didn’t say so,” I replied in a similar tongue in cheek vein. “But he’d have been more interested in the ichthyosaur, he used to like fishing.”

“That was 189 million years old,” she said.

“Yeah, nearly as old as I feel.”

The weather was dry today despite a cool breeze I took them out for a bike ride, though it took almost as long to pump up tyres as it did to ride. Danni came as well and she and I raced a couple of times to break up the boredom of waiting for Meems to catch up.

In the afternoon I made them do any homework they had while I did some survey work and signed some letters that Delia brought round. Two more months and we start finals and other exams, not my favourite time but from next week I try to do or organise someone to do, refresher sessions on topics mentioned by students as being difficult to grasp. Perhaps I should invite the US senate over if we do one on evolution. I couldn’t believe that guy on the Today programme, a Republican senator or congressman who wouldn’t say if he believed in Darwin’s theory of evolution through natural selection—presumably because it could influence his supporters, many of whom presumably believe the earth is flat and that UKIP is a benign influence—just like the Nazi party.

David made his own lamb sausages for dinner and they were absolutely scrumptious. I wouldn’t have the patience, but then these days I don’t seem to have much anyway. Having eaten I was however feeling quite mellow when James called—not on the phone—he arrived. Of course David made him the equivalent of a hot dog with a couple of left over sausages at which Simon complained—he’d had six of the things, so I defended David, Simon being too fat already.

I sat and waited while he smothered his sausage in French mustard and stuffed it down faster than Kiki could have managed, washed down with a bottle of beer Simon provided.

“You said you’d worked out what you were doing before you were stabbed?” I plunged in and asked.

“Hmm hmm,” he said chewing the last of his sausage roll with mustard. I waited sipping my tea. He took a swallow of beer and added, “Yeah, took me a while to piece it all together, whatever it was they used on the blade really screwed with my head.”

I ignored the opportunity to points score and waited for this great revelation. “Yeah, I was standing outside a chip shop eating my steak an’ kidney an’ chips an’ I felt like I’d been kicked in the back, I felt wet stuff an’ knew what had happened, so I came to you.”

“Just as well or you’d be a murder statistic now.”

“Indeed. Anyhow, I’d been watching these guys who looked Middle Eastern types all beards and yashmaks...” At this I snorted tea all over myself and he paused while I wiped myself off with a tea towel. “I wasn’t shadowing them but once they saw me watching them they got very erratic in their behaviour and next thing I’m bleeding everywhere.”

“Do you remember what you saw?” I asked.

“I just spent two hours with Special Branch and they couldn’t get me to remember it, so we’ve got no chance.”

“Well at least I don’t think we’re in any danger from Arab terrorists at the university, are we?”

James had gone quiet, he was rerunning something. “I can only get fragments, there is something about the university and about you in particular. Oh shit—that’s it.”

“What is?”

“They—whoever they are—were going to flood the city with drugs they were going to manufacture at the university. They had some stooges lined up to act as distributors with no link back to our Arab friends. The drugs were going to be bad stuff because they consider anyone who abuses drugs deserves to die. The police were going to be knee deep in dead drug users which would create an emergency situation, and while that was happening they’d move on and hit somewhere else.

“They were concerned that if you took control of the council, you’d stop it happening so they wanted to kill you.”

“They suspect you’ll be the driving force behind the new council and thus Gasgoine was finished. They’d been operating through him—paid him a small fortune—but as he had no longer much input or authority at the university, they made him redundant.”

“Killed him you mean?”

“Quite.”

“So they want to kill me for that?”

“Essentially, yes.”

“Wonderful, I have the Al Quaida equivalent of Boots trying to knock me off because of something they think I might do.”

“Well you would stop them, wouldn’t you?”

“Absolutely.”

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Comments

And the plot thickens

Sammi's picture

What is it with these wannabe gangsters and attacking Cathy, you'd have thought that they'd do research her previous encounters with bad guys.

Writing this is hard as my eyes are blurry as I'm still laughing

“Wonderful, I have the Al Quaida equivalent of Boots trying to knock me off because of something they think I might do.”


"REMEMBER, No matter where you go, There you are."

Sammi xxx

Interesting

But how do the accountants fit into the conspiracy, or is what they are up to separate skullduggery?

Thanks for the new episode Angharad.

Attack Cathy?

Are they insane, or don't they know Lady Cathy Watts Cameron? She's defeated all sorts of criminal elements, singly and en masse. What makes them think they can defeat an angle with a junior angel sidekick?
This is going to be a very interesting chapter in the life of the Cameron sept.
I wonder if it will kick-start her career as envisioned by the goddess?
Stay tuned! We're in for a really great ride! :-D)

Red MacDonald

Ah, that's it.

I think you mean Dishdasha as opposed to Yashmak. :) The Dishdasha being the long white shirt the men wear and the other being what I call a Niqab. I was Niqabi for a very short time. People are very mean to those who wear it.

Gwen

Paul Gascoigne Dead? Internet Hoax Claims English Football Died

Edit.
Just ignore.

Paul Gascoigne is dead. At least that's what the Internet is saying. However the former England international footballer didn't die. He's just the victim of an Internet death hoax. Paul Gascoigne is fine.

Rumors started swirling this week that Gascoigne died. There are no specifics to how the famous soccer player died but a tweet by Sky News was going around saying "BREAKING: Footballer Paul Gascoigne has died at the age of 47. More shortly.." The original tweet was sent out by SkyNews0. However when users try to go to the profile, it says the account has been suspended.

http://www.travelerstoday.com/articles/10478/20140620/paul,g...

Who called in Special Branch to see Jim?

Rhona McCloud's picture

A very odd feeling not having the next part of Bike to hand! It seems I have joined the growing ranks of those who have read EAFOAB from the beginning to the latest episode. Thank you Angharad it proved a remarkable ride and I look forward to as many more parts to come as you can manage - especially if it helps me understand how Al Quaida and Special Branch got involved.

Rhona McCloud