I didn't sleep well during the night. I kept waking up and going back to sleep. I got up and walked to the kitchen for a drink. My eyes were still partially closed. I wasn't thinking right because when I got there I stopped. I forgot I was a dog.
“How was I going to get a cup of water?” I looked at the doggie bowl on the floor. “No way was I going to drink from a water bowl,” I thought. “Especially when Zelda already drank from it.” the thought made me grossed out, but I was really thirsty. I had to drink something. I walked over to the bowl and was disappointed. It was empty. I needed a drink.
I must have been whining, because next thing that happened was mom walked into the room.
“Alyssa?” She complained. “Do you have to make so much noise?” She took the bowl and filled it with water. When she brought it down to me. “Sorry about that girl.”
I looked at it.
“How does a dog drink from this?” I thought. I put my nose over to it and sniffed it. I knew it was water. I started lapping it up. “Eww” I thought. “But wait, this doesn't even taste bad at all.” My tongue thought it tasted like the best thing ever. Like it was a soda. I must have been thirsty, because I drank the whole thing. Now I feel like I should have left some for Zelda.
I walk back to my doggie bed. I was about to lay down, but heard a noise coming from the washroom. I walk over and see Zelda was drinking from the toilet. It was disgusting. I can't believe that a dog would even drink from a place that people go poop in.
I made a note to myself. “If I EVER drink from that, I will never forgive myself.”
In the morning, I woke up to a mess in the room I was in. Toilet paper was on the floor everywhere. Someone had tee-peed the room. I stretch and yawn. I didn't even even get out of the doggie bed when I heard a scream from the other room.
I ran out of the room as fast as I could and saw that everywhere not including the room I was in was a mess. Garbage everywhere.
“Alyssa!” yelled mom. “How could you do this?”
What was I suppose to do. I couldn't talk to her. I sat there looking at the mess. It didn't take long because I was kicked out the door. Why was I always the one to be blamed. I was blamed when I was a human and now I was blamed as a dog. It doesn't even matter if I was a dog or human.
I sat on the patio for a little while wondering who had done it. It couldn't have been me. I know Zelda wouldn't have done it. My dog never did anything bad like that. Would she have done it?
I saw Boo in his backyard. I walked over to see him. When I was a human, I went over to Boo many times. He is a good dog. Boo saw me coming. I can tell he was happy to see me, because his tail was wagging. When I got to his backyard, he walked up to me and...
“What is he doing?” I couldn't see him that well, because of this damn cone on me. He was in back of me and... “Oh you're sniffing me.” Just like any dog would do. It's like a hand shake, but dogs sniff. “Should I do that too?” This is going to be gross. I never sniffed anyone's butt. Not even mine. Oh wait... never mind. To much information.
The next thing I knew, I was also sniffing his... oh man, did he reek. Why do dogs smell each others butts. Do each dogs have a distinct smell? I wonder what I smell like. I couldn't tell because... again, the cone.
I wonder if Boo knows I was a boy dog before? Or can he tell I am a girl now? I hope he can't tell, because one, I just got out of surgery yesterday and am not healed. And two... the one I am dreading the most. mating. I don't want to get pregnant. This was not my plan when I made that wish to be a dog. I was hoping to be on the opposite end. A stud. You know what I mean. That’s the thing about dogs, they don’t have to worry about being a father. But because I am a bitch, I worry I might get pregnant.
Now that I am a girl and the vet made it that I can get pregnant, I might end up dealing with labor pains. If that does happen, I hope it isn't as painful as a human goes... why I am thinking about this?
Boy am I babbling. Or is it thinking to much. I am a dog, I should enjoy it. I am only going to be a dog for a few months, I might as well enjoy it while I can. I look back.
“Where did Boo Go?” I look around and spot him rolling around in a mud puddle. “Did it rain last night? I don't remember it raining” Then it hit me. We both had a bath yesterday because of the skunk. The ground was still muddy because of all the water. This is the opportunity I can finally do. If I were human, I would be in so much trouble if I got all muddy, I would end up being grounded and not be able to hang out with my friends or play video games. As a dog... okay, I would be in trouble, but I wouldn't be grounded. Dogs are always so lucky. I wish I were a.. “Oh Wait I am a dog.” I ran over to boo and started rolling in the mud. I was having so much fun, I didn't even know that I broke the cone.
“Alyssa!” I heard mom yelling at me. “Come here!”
I am a dog, why should I listen to you? I kept on rolling around. I can tell it was making mom ticked off. If I could laugh, I would be laughing about now. Mom got me out of the puddle. I started to shake.
“You better not do that!” mom yelled. It was too late, I shook all the mud onto mom. Again the laughing would have been great at that moment. Next thing I knew mom was swearing up a storm. She was using words, I have never heard before. But I can tell that they were cuss words. I may be a little beagle, but I sure did make a big mess. Boo was worse of a mess. I wish I could see his owners expression when they see him.
“Time for another bath for you Missy!” Mom growled at me. So far this was the best day of being a dog. And the day just started. Just wait until mom cleans me off.
Just wait.