Have you ever seen the look in the eyes of a deer, just before you slam into it with your car? It’s a look of complete confusion and shock, as if to say ‘Oh my god, what is that coming at me?’ That was the look I got when I went to Sarah’s house to see her mom. Becoming Antonia Part 19. By; Me, & Zomba.

Let me start by saying that her mom and I have never really gotten along all that well. She controls every aspect of her family’s life, and I refused to let her do that with mine. I have my own family to worry about. I don’t need someone who’s never met either of my parents telling me what I can and can’t do with my life. She really hated when I was working in NASCAR. Sarah would make trips down to see me during the week, and whenever we had a rare off weekend. It just tweaked her mom to no end that Sarah wouldn’t be under her thumb when she was with me. I could almost hear her cheer when I left the cup when dad had his stroke.

Sarah, for her part, just tries to play peacemaker between her mom and me. It’s not that I try to piss her mom off, it’s just that I refuse to let her dictate to me what happens.

Take for instance, the time last year when I was coming home for Watkins Glen Weekend. I had set it up with my team owner to have Sarah and my dad put on the sponsor pass list, so they could get into the garage. Her mom FREAKED! At the last minute, she made the decision to come back to Syracuse and throw a cookout at the family’s summer camp. Well, as you can guess, Sarah told her that she had plans. Her mom called my cell phone, and I honestly think that, if that woman had the technology to do so, she would have reached through the phone and choked me. She called me every name in the book for tying up her daughter’s time for that weekend. It’s not like I could move the weekend of the race. So, I calmly suggested she change her cookout to the following weekend. You’d have thought I asked her to hold the cookout on the moon by the way she reacted.

“I’m not changing my plans to suit the schedule of a lazy good for nothing piece of shit like you!” Mind you that is a direct quote. Those words have stuck with me to this day, and it hurts. It hurts to think that nothing I do will be good enough for his woman.

What more could I do? I was already working 100 hours a week between the shop and the track. A guy’s gotta sleep, doesn’t he? As for being good for nothing, I had used the money I saved from my pay working for the cup teams to buy the ring for Sarah. Not to mention that I was only one pay check short of having the down payment on a three acre plot of land I’d had my eye on, so I could build a house for Sarah and me. Again, I digress. The woman just hated something about me.
You know what? I wasn’t her biggest fan either, but I was always as nice as I could be, so I didn’t upset Sarah. That was the only thing that mattered to me, Sarah’s happiness.

On the short ride from the hospital to Sarah’s house, I asked if her mom knew yet about the baby. Sarah almost swerved into oncoming traffic from the shock of realizing that sooner or later she’d have to tell her mom.

“How about we hit her with it today? I mean she’ll already be in shock of seeing me like this for the first time, so maybe she won’t react that adversely,” I suggested.

“Um, how about we just play it by ear. Let’s see how mom reacts to the new you before we go any farther.”

Once we pulled up to the house, the butterflies in my stomach started playing football. It was a good thing I hadn’t eaten lunch, or I probably would have lost it all right then. All I could do was follow Sarah into the house and take a deep breath as I was reintroduced to her family.

It was like watching one of those old movies when a biker walks into a social function at a country club. Everyone went silent, and you could have heard a pin drop. In fact, you could clearly hear the glass her sister Mandy dropped in the kitchen shatter on the floor and counted the pieces. The first one to do or say anything was Mara. She’s the youngest and once told me that she always looked at me like the brother she never had.

“Oh my god, PAT! How are you feeling?” she asked as she ran over and hugged me.

“I’m doing better. Thanks Mar,” I told her and then just gave a wave to their mom.

“Uh, am I missing something?” was Gail’s (Sarah’s mom) only reply.

“Mom, remember, we talked about this. Pat had an accident in Alfred. He fell into a pool of toxic waste and changed into a woman,” Sarah reminded her like someone would do with a small child, which immediately pissed Gail off.

“Don’t you talk to me like that young lady!”

“Uh, mom, you’re acting like this is the first time you’ve heard this. We talked about it at breakfast,” Sarah bantered back.

“I know what we talked about, but that isn’t Pat,” she said as she just glared at me. “Pat is a fat, lazy good for nothing slob that doesn’t deserve you.”

“Ah, so the truth comes out finally,” I interjected. “What’s your issue? Is it that I’m Italian? Or, is it the fact that I actually allow your daughter to have a mind of her own when she’s with me? Is that it, you control freak? You don’t like that I allow Sarah to think for herself and I actually listen to what she thinks and has to say?”

Gail just looked at me with fire in her eyes. I don’t think anyone’s ever challenged her like that before, but, at this point, I’d been through too much in my life to sit there and allow this woman to just manipulate and control the situation. I could see out of the corner of my eye that both Mandy and Mara had their mouths hanging open in shock. I figured now was as good a time as any, so I blasted Gail again.

“And another thing. Sarah’s carrying my child. So, congratulations, you’re going to be a grandmother. How do you like those apples?”

Her mom simply flopped down in a chair and looked at the both of us in shock. I’m still not sure if it was from what I’d said to her about being a control freak, or about Sarah being pregnant, but mission accomplished. She shut the fuck up.

She sat there for about an hour, while the rest of us caught up on what had been going on. I told Mara and Mandy about the accident and my hospital stay. Then about what my lawyer had told me about same sex marriage. This was when Gail piped up again.

“Canada would be good. They have free health care up there.” she said in a clam clear voice.

“Yes they do, but I’d like to research the school systems of each place and find which one would be the best to raise a child in,” I said, as I held Sarah’s hand.

“That’s a very important thing to consider also,” Gail said nodding. “An education is so important today.”

“It’s just a shame we have to move to be together. If I had it my way, I’d stay in Syracuse; however, New York State doesn’t recognize same sex marriage.”

“It is a shame. Too bad no one has the gumption to do anything about it.”

“Some day. Perhaps when we get the first female president we’ll see it happen,” I mentioned in hopes to continue to keep the happy Gail around. I knew she was all for women in office.

I think I finally reached her. After all the time I’d known this woman, she was actually speaking with me, instead of at me. It kind of felt good to just sit and have a normal conversation for once. Sarah and I finally left after a few hours, and I had gotten a nice chance to talk with Gail while Sarah, Mandy and Mara went up to Sarah’s room to help her pack a small suit case, so she could stay with me. We both came to the agreement that we both wanted Sarah to be happy, whatever that took we’d work with each other to make it happen. We even hugged as Sarah and I left for my dad’s house.

It felt good to get home and back into my own bed. What made me even happier, was that dad didn’t try to be funny and put pink sheets on my bed. He just washed my blue ones and put fresh cases on the pillows. After a pizza from one of the local joints, we all turned in, and Sarah and I cuddled in a bed that was actually meant to have two people in it.

To be continued...