Jaye Michael

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WARNING: PART TWO INCLUDES MATURE MATERIAL (E.G., FOUL LANGUAGE, PROSTITUTION, RAPE, AND MURDER).
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Jaye Michael

PART TWO: CONVOLUTION

Chapter Eighteen: Partial Peroration

God is subtle, but He is not malicious.
— Albert Einstein
At any rate, I am convinced that He does not play dice.
— Albert Einstein

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WARNING: PART TWO INCLUDES MATURE MATERIAL (E.G., FOUL LANGUAGE, PROSTITUTION, RAPE, AND MURDER).

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Jaye Michael

PART TWO: CONVOLUTION

Chapter Seventeen: Quadration

I wasn’t kissing her,
I was just whispering in her mouth.
— Chico Marx

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WARNING: PART TWO INCLUDES MATURE MATERIAL (E.G., FOUL LANGUAGE, PROSTITUTION, RAPE, AND MURDER).
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Jaye Michael

PART TWO: CONVOLUTION

Chapter Sixteen: Palingenesis

I enjoy convalescence.
It is the part that makes illness worthwhile.
— George Bernard Shaw

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WARNING: PART TWO INCLUDES MATURE MATERIAL (E.G., FOUL LANGUAGE, PROSTITUTION, RAPE, AND MURDER).
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Jaye Michael

PART TWO: CONVOLUTION

Chapter Fifteen: Variegation Maximization

Plus ca change, plus c’est le meme chose.
[The more things change, the more they remain the same.]
— Alphonse Karr

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WARNING: PART TWO INCLUDES MATURE MATERIAL (E.G., FOUL LANGUAGE, PROSTITUTION, RAPE, AND MURDER).

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Jaye Michael

PART TWO: CONVOLUTION

Chapter Fourteen: Pandemia

It’s not the men in my life that counts,
it’s the life in my men.
— Mae West

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WARNING: PART TWO INCLUDES MATURE MATERIAL (E.G., FOUL LANGUAGE, PROSTITUTION, RAPE, AND MURDER).

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Jaye Michael

PART TWO: CONVOLUTION

Chapter Thirteen: Kismet?

Now this is not the end.
It is not even the beginning of the end.
But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.
— Sir Winston Churchill

Tradeoffs-12

WARNING: PART TWO INCLUDES MATURE MATERIAL (E.G., FOUL LANGUAGE, PROSTITUTION, RAPE, AND MURDER).

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Jaye Michael

PART TWO: CONVOLUTION

Chapter Twelve: Proliferation

For while we have sex in the mind,
we truly have none in the body.
— D. H. Lawrence

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WARNING: PART TWO INCLUDES MATURE MATERIAL (E.G., FOUL LANGUAGE, PROSTITUTION, RAPE, AND MURDER).

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Jaye Michael

PART TWO: CONVOLUTION

Chapter Eleven: Cozener

Come into my arms my beamish boy.
— “Jabberwocky” by Lewis Carroll

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WARNING: PART TWO INCLUDES MATURE MATERIAL (E.G., FOUL LANGUAGE, PROSTITUTION, RAPE, AND MURDER).

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Jaye Michael

PART TWO: CONVOLUTION

Chapter Ten: Meretrix

Being a woman is a terribly difficult task
since it consists principally in dealing with men.
— Joseph Conrad

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Jaye Michael

PART ONE: EVOLUTION

Chapter Nine: Elucidation

The brain is not an organ of sex.
— Charlotte Perkins Gilman

Since when?
— Senior Editor

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Jaye Michael

PART ONE: EVOLUTION

Chapter Eight: Adaptation

There’s no use trying, one can’t believe impossible things.
— Lewis Carroll

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Jaye Michael

PART ONE: EVOLUTION

Chapter Seven: Savoir Faire

In just seven days, I can make you a man.
                          -- Dr. Frank N. Furter
                                                            from The Rocky Horror Picture Show

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Jaye Michael

PART ONE: EVOLUTION

Chapter Six: Disenthralled

Everyone thinks of changing the world,
but no one thinks of changing himself.
—Leo Tolstoy

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Jaye Michael

PART ONE: EVOLUTION

Chapter Five: Cossets and Cossacks

Half the work that is done in this world
is to make things appear what they are not.
— Ails Root Beadle

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Jaye Michael

PART ONE: EVOLUTION

Chapter Four: Entrapment

If I or she should chance to be
Involved in this affair,
He trusts to you to set them free,
Exactly as we were.
—from Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll

 

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Jaye Michael

PART ONE: EVOLUTION

Chapter Three: Elusion

A rose is a rose is a rose.
— Gertrude Stein
...unless it’s something else.
— [Editor’s Note]

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Jaye Michael

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Jaye Michael

 

PART ONE: EVOLUTION

Chapter Two: Transmogrification

Nothing is ever so bad that it cannot get worse.
— Gattuso’s Extension of Murphy’s Law

 

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Jaye Michael


PART ONE: EVOLUTION

Chapter One: Anlage

The early worm deserves the bird.
— Robert A. Heinlein

Deus Ex

Deus Ex
Jaye Michael

 

WAKING EPISODE ONE

 

Darkness. I wonder what time it is. Time to stretch and roll over.

Hey! What gives? I can’t move.

Blonde Joke-23

THE FINAL CHAPTER
Blonde Joke
Chapter Twenty-Three
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

What do you get when you put several blondes in a freezer?
Frosted Flakes

Blonde Joke-22

Blonde Joke
Chapter Twenty-Two
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

Can you name some of the inventions blondes have developed?
1. Tricycle kickstand.
2. Solar flashlight.
3. Fire proof matches.
4. Inflatable dartboard.
5. Glass hammer.
6. Black light bulb.
7. Boomerang grenade.

Blonde Joke-21

Blonde Joke
Chapter Twenty-One
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

Why do blondes smile during lightning storms?
They think their pictures are being taken.

Blonde Joke-20

Blonde Joke
Chapter Twenty
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

How many blondes does it take to play hide and seek?
One.

Blonde Joke-19

Blonde Joke
Chapter Nineteen
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

A one armed blonde is hanging from a tree. How can you make her fall?
You wave at her.

Blonde Joke-18

Blonde Joke
Chapter Eighteen
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

How can you tell if a Blonde has been working on a computer?
White-Out® on the screen.

Blonde Joke-17

Blonde Joke
Chapter Seventeen
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

What does a blonde owl say?
What? What?

Blonde Joke-16

Blonde Joke
Chapter Sixteen
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

Did you hear about the blonde who thought she had a twin sister?
She didn’t realize she was looking in the mirror.

Blonde Joke-15

Blonde Joke
Chapter Fifteen
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

And, of course, the ultimate blonde joke is, “What’s black and blue and brunette?”
A brunette that’s told one too many blonde jokes.

Blonde Joke-14

Blonde Joke
Chapter Fourteen
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

How can you keep a blonde occupied for hours?
Give her a card that says, “Turn over,” on each side.

Blonde Joke-13

Blonde Joke
Chapter Thirteen
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

What does a blonde think an innuendo is?
An Italian suppository.

Blonde Joke-12

Blonde Joke
Chapter Twelve
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

Why don’t bosses let blondes take lunch breaks?
So they don’t have to retrain them if they find their way back.

Blonde Joke-11

Blonde Joke
Chapter Eleven
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
Run like Hell. She’s got a hand grenade in her mouth.

Blonde Joke-10

Blonde Joke
Chapter Ten
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?
She fell out of the tree.

Blonde Joke-09

Blonde Joke
Chapter Nine
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

When is it legal to shoot a blonde in the head?
When you have a patch and a tire pump to reinflate it.

Blonde Joke-08

Blonde Joke
Chapter Eight
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

Why can’t blondes put in light bulbs?
They keep breaking them with the hammers.

Blonde Joke-07

Blonde Joke
Chapter Seven
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, a dumb blonde,
and a smart blonde are walking down the street
when they spot a $10 bill. Who picks it up?

The dumb blonde. There’s no such thing as
Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, or a smart blonde.

Blonde Joke-06

Blonde Joke
Chapter Six
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

How many blonde jokes are there?
None. They’re all true
.

Blonde Joke-05

Blonde Joke
Chapter Five
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
Three. One to mix the dough and two to sort the M&Ms to remove the “W”s, “E”s and “3”s.

Blonde Joke-04

Blonde Joke
Chapter Four
by Jeffrey M. Mahr

 

What is a blonde with brunette died hair?
Artificial Intelligence.

Blonde Joke - Revised

Blonde Joke
Revised
by Jaye Michael

To Shape One's Life - 4

TO SHAPE ONE'S LIFE
Part 4 of 4
Chapter Nine: Cavalry's Coming.

by Jeffrey M. Mahr

Heroing is one of the shortest lived professions there is.

-- Will Rogers

To Shape One's Life - 3

TO SHAPE ONE'S LIFE
Part 3 of 4
Chapter Six: Deities to Go

by Jeffrey M. Mahr

It seems that I have spent my entire time
trying to make life more rational
and that it was all wasted effort.

-- A. J. Ayer

To Shape One's Life - 2

TO SHAPE ONE'S LIFE
Part 2 of 4

by Jeffrey M. Mahr

A tree cannot grow in the sky,
nor clouds be in the sea, nor fish live in the fields,
nor can blood be in sticks nor sap in rocks.

-- Titus Lucretius Carus<

To Shape One's Life

To Shape One's Life

by Jaye Michael

To Shape One's Life - 1

This was written about ten years ago. The idea was to answer the question,
"What would you do if you could do absolutely anything?"
It's presented here in sections. All 4 parts are now posted

TO SHAPE ONE'S LIFE
Part 1 of 4
Prelude and Chapter One: Showtime.

by Jeffrey M. Mahr

You see things; and you say "Why?"
But I dream things that never were;
and I say "Why not?"

-- George Bernard Shaw


From Fire, From Ice

From Fire, From Ice

fire-ice.jpg

By Jaye Michael

Be thou chaste as ice, pure as snow,
thou shalt not escape calumny.
— William Shakespeare
Hamlet, III, i, 142

 

Day One

    Desolate but breathtaking, that’s how Charlie Dawson always described the Alaskan tundra. After completing his residency in General Medicine, he had fled joyously back to the land of his youth. Others had twisted and fought like salmon at the end of a hook only to be slowly reeled back into the bosom of the state that had covered the huge loans incurred by eight or more years of study and training. For some reason, the State of Alaska expected them to practice in the “Land of the Midnight Sun” or immediately reimburse the state for its costs—with interest and stiff penalties.

Animated Story

It's been a while since I've submitted anything, but I've just completed a 13 episode serial based on the idea that there are shapechangers in the world. They don't know why or how they can do what they can do, but the government is aware of their existance and wants their abilities. It has located as many as it can and is incarcerating them, hiding them away, denying them their due process rights, and performing non-consentual experiments on them. Of course, this is a fantasy; it could never really happen in this country.

Blonde Joke

Blonde Joke

by Jaye Michael

Some people can't take a joke.

NOW COMPLETE!

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