I was supposed to have a date today. I met a girl online and we have chatted and text for a few weeks.

Today, life gave me a little reminder. I remember now that it does not matter how hard you try, how hard you work, how much you want something or how much you need something. No matter what, it will never be enough. I would like to thank Life for giving me this reminder. I really needed it. I was actually starting to feel good about myself and the direction my life has been going. I have never been one for alcohol but today I could use a stiff drink.

Jessica Marie

About 2 months ago, I opened up to a woman at work about myself. She's great. She recently left the call center where we work together and in the last couple days a coworker of mine has said that she told him about my secrets but she did swear him to secrecy. He has not outed me as of yet but he is lording it over me. I told him to go ahead and tell people since no one will believe a big mouth like him anyways. He has also jokingly implied blackmail. I have spoken to a supervisor with out naming names.

Hi Everyone. Well today was a interesting day. I went on my first date. Thats right. I'm 28 and today was my first date. Kinda pathetic huh. I met a guy through a gay dating site. He contacted me first and we have been talking every day during the week since. we went out today. He's a great guy, but I just dont know what to do,say or how to respond to so many things when on a date. I'm not even all that comfortable being affectionate with people. He is a very affectionate person and it throws me off my game sometimes. we went for a walk and then we went for pizza.

Hi. When I come to this site, or go to another chapter or something after being on the same page for a while, I am redirected to amazon. It is actually two seprate amazon pages. One is the main page as you go to amazon, then right away it goes to another page where there is only a small box at the top of the page that has amazon's tg library in it.

Does anyone know why this is happening and how to stop it?

Thanks
Jessica Marie

Well it's great to be home. I just got back from my sisters house in alabama last night. Man it was boring down there. I took my nephew to school and back every day. Round trip it was an hour and 40 minites. Other than that I could not do much. I was broke. No money to spendy. Then my sister only had dial up for interner and her computer is like 10 years old. It took 10 minites to check my email. I went to a books a million store to use their wifi and it cost me $4.95. I had to keep entering my password for the day. it sucked.

Hi everyone. It looks like I might be spending a week down in Alabama at the begining of September. I will be in Russellvile.

Hi everyone. One of my favorite sites for TG reading has always been Allison D'murrells website over on Yahoo. I love her stories. Unfortunatly it's gone now.

Well, my mother came into my room a few minites ago and we talked for a little bit.

Hi everyone. I'm at work today and a little while ago a nurses aide came up to me and told me that a patient that she was moving a short time before had seen me and had thought that I was a girl.

Heavenly Joint

“Come on Lucifer, your falling behind. We have to finish creating these souls. It’s almost time for them to be born.”

“I’m hurrying as fast as I can Mike. The soul O’matic is just not as fast as it used to be. It’s been acting up lately so I put in a call to Heavenly Maintenance.”

“Give me a break, Lucifer. You’d get more work done if you didn't take a break every 5 minutes.”

It's me again. In my blog from yesturday I talked about my car accident.

Many times in my life I have taken crap from other people. I did not have the good comebacks or the will power to stand up to them. When I started at my present job it was much the same.

Friday was a great day. I went and did some shopping. I was looking for shoes but I did not find any in my size that I liked.

Ever since I posted my new poem “Prison of the Heart”, I have been contacted by a few people that I respect and they have said that they are worried about me.

These past few months have been interesting to say the least. After everything that has happened to me this summer I have finally started to be more honest with myself. But to tell you the truth, being honest with myself only adds to my pain. I acknowledge the fact that I am transgendered. I want to be a woman.

Things have been going okay lately. I finally got a chance to talk with my sister without anyone around. we had a very nice chat. Before we talked, she emailed me. In the emial she called me Jessica. When I saw that, I was so happy that I started crying. We talked for almost an hour. This all started when I thought she had seen this site on my computer. Well, guess what? She did not see a thing.

I'm looking for a story about a bisnessman who stay in a hotel. He asks for some meds to help his head. When he wakes up he is a woman. He comes back again and again and even gets his boss in on the act. They both eventually take the special treatment to become women forever. I really want to read this story again. If anyone can help, I'd really appricate it.

In my last blog I told everyone that I came out to my sister. A few minites ago I got this email from her.

Steven,

I talked to my sister today. I called her. I called her because I wanted her to say something about what was on my computer. I really did. She never said anything about it, but she did ask me if there was anything I wanted to talk about. She asked me that a couple of times.

My sister left this morning and she was acting normal. well as normal as my family ever gets. So I guess she is not going to say anything. I don't know, maybe she did not want to bring it up with others near by. I'll just have to play it by ear.

I want to thank everyone for their support. I really appriciate it and I really needed it. So again, THANK YOU!!!

I'm stuck at home this week recovering from my accident. I'm doing a lot better and I'm off the pain pills for the most part. I only need 1 a day now generally. I enjoy the time off from work but I'm so bored. I can't go anywhere because I have no car now. I have gone for walks but I still get tired fast. I tryed taking my dog for a walk but her pulling me around aggravated my neck.