Joannebarbarella

A Basic Type Of Theft

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I don't know if this will help anyone except as a cautionary tale and maybe a warning to frequently check your bank accounts.

I came back from holiday a little more than a week ago and went to the ATM to withdraw some pocket money, only to be told that my account was now invalid, so I went into the branch and asked what was going on. The nice lady at the Help desk took my card and called up my details on the computer. She turned the screen towards me and I immediately saw that I had been hacked and robbed.

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And The Band Played Waltzing Matilda

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Eric Bogle - The Band Played Waltzing Matilda - YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WG48Ftsr3OI

And the Band Played Waltzing Matilda" is a song written by Scottish-born
Australian singer-songwriter Eric Bogle in 1971. The song describes war as futile
and ...

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All In A Day's Work

All In A Day’s Work

By Joannebarbarella


This is a tribute to someone who did not even know she was a heroine (and probably still doesn’t). She’s a member of our sorority here at BC. I have not sought her permission to publish this piece as it can be construed as fiction, and probably much of it is, but I hope she likes it. I think she may recognize herself.

This might also qualify for Dorothy’s Challenge

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A Journey

A Journey

By Joannebarbarella

I smile at my customer as I place his drink on the table. His gaze is firmly fixed on my breasts almost spilling out of my low-cut top as I bend forwards. and I doubt if he even sees me smile.

“Will there be anything else, Sir?” I ask breathily. I now know a prospect when I see one. This one’s good for at least a blow-job if not a full fuck.That’s how I make my real money and meet my goals.

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D-DAY PLUS

By Joannebarbarella

The Remains Of The Day. The Rest of D-Day

First hurdle cleared.

I went into my office breathing a sigh of relief and feeling twenty pounds lighter. Margaret had accepted me without blinking an eye. I called her my receptionist but in truth she was much more than that. She was my gate-keeper and the one with whom I shared “post-mortem” appreciations of new and unknown clients. A second opinion of a client is always very valuable, and she was very perceptive….as indeed she had just shown.

Where, Oh Where, Has It Gone?

Since the latest site upgrade my Thumbs Up button has disappeared. Obviously it hasn't for others, as the stories I've been reading have been accumulating Kudoses like crazy.

Is there a simple solution? Or is it just me?

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Randalynn

If you ever doubted the quality of the stories on this site (which you shouldn't have anyway) then read Randalynn's "Firefly" series. She says they're fan fiction, but in fact Joss Whedon should be reading these and basing an extension of the TV series on this saga, which captures the absolute essence of his Serenity/Firefly tales. They are magic.

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I Want To Be The First

To wish our lovely space puppy, Laika, an Extra-Special Very Happy Brthday. Inter-National Date Lines mess up my timing a little, but she was born on the Ides Of March, which is tomorrow by my calendar.

It is fantastic to see her gracing our site again, with suitably appropriate mermaids.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RONNI

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Christmas Day In Oz

Well, We're a little ahead of most of you, so I'll throw another prawn on the barbie for you.
A Very Merry Christmas and a Happy, Healthy and Prosperous New Year to all at Big Closet and thanks to all the Elves who do Santa's hard work all the year round for keeping everything running smoothly.DSC_0010_0.jpg

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Prudence

PRUDENCE

By Joannebarbarella

This little story was inspired by Angela Rasch's recent blog about Forced Fem. I hope she likes it.

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“I’m a very good maid,” she told herself somewhat smugly for maybe the fiftieth time that day, “a very good maid indeed.”

As I Age

AS I AGE - FOOD FOR THOUGHT?

1. I talk to myself, because sometimes I need expert advice.

2. Sometimes I roll my eyes out loud.

3. I don't need anger management. I need people to stop pissing me off.

4. My people skills are just fine. It's my tolerance of idiots that needs work.

5. The biggest lie I tell myself is "I don't need to write that down, I'll remember it."

6. When I was a child I thought nap time was punishment. Now it's like a mini-vacation.

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2602 Chapters Ago

I saw today that someone had left a new comment on Episode 173 of EAFOAB, so, out of curiosity, I called up the whole string of comments and found a very lively, witty, and erudite exchange about discussions and quotations from such luminaries as Oscar Wilde, George Bernard Shaw, Winston Churchill, Franklin Roosevelt, et al... and even Elvis.

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Maybe The World Is Catching Up

Would you believe, in The Australian Financial Review of all places, there is a full-page article about a manga comic called Wandering Son, which tells the story of two teenage kids....Shuichi, "a boy who wants to be a girl" and Yoshino, "a girl who wants to be a boy".

The article says that the story was originally published in a magazine called Comic Beam, ran from 2002 to 2013 and was adapted into a TV series in 2011, which was apparently very popular. They claim over a million readers and viewers.

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Oh! To Be A Girl

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For personal real life issues, like not being allowed access to my grandchildren, I cannot live full-time as a woman. However, I find relief in going for regular make-overs to a very professional lady on the Gold Coast of Queensland (isn't that an ironic name?) who does a great job of transforming me into a somewhat realistic semblance of a female. I have to say that I love myself after she has performed her magic upon me, even though I can only maintain the illusion for a relatively short time.

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Unusual For A Murdoch Newspaper

It's not often that a Murdoch publication prints something as objective as this.

http://www.theaustralian.com.au/life/weekendaustralianmagazine

Transgender children: what's behind the spike in numbers?

I hope the link works.

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Andreja Pejic

Andreja (formerly Andrej) has just scored a major gig as the "face" of a high-profile cosmetics company, becoming the first transgender person to achieve such a position. At only 23 she comes across in interviews as an intelligent and thoughtful young woman on the subject of transgender issues. She also happens to be ravishingly beautiful (which makes me totally jealous or would if I were 50 years younger).

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Random Authors

A couple of months ago I noticed a massive uptick in the number of hits on my stories and couldn't figure out why, since I hadn't written anything for ages. It was only later that I found that I had just been included in the "12 Random Authors" list at the time so I can confirm that it really works.

One strange thing was that while I got literally hundreds of extra hits I didn't get a single additional comment or "thumbs up". I don't know what that signifies. Perhaps people just dip in and decide they don't like the story and move on.

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Christmas Fairy Queen

I read a story by Robyn Hoode over on TG Storytime called "Christmas Fairy Queen" which she claims to be not sufficiently good to be posted here. She's wrong and needs to be shown the error of her ways. This is definitely a BC level story. Let's raise a little bit of Cain here ladies,

Joanne

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On The Subject OF Christmas Songs

This is one that you will definitely not hear in shopping malls. Take note of my warnings.

www.youtube.com.sg/watch?v=tEe55NxFSSU

Otherwise, have a very Merry Christmas,

Joanne

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Apologies To The Odd Reader

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I do apologise to those few readers who may have been waiting for another chapter of my last story "After The Ball". I have just not been able to come up with anything which satisfies me or seems to be a valid continuation and so I have retitled the previous post "Just For The Ball?" with very minor changes to make it a stand-alone. If anyone thinks that they can continue the tale please feel free to do so. Just run it past me before posting. Sorry,

Joanne

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Beautiful Songs Written In Pain

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Here I am again, indulging in my usual late night indulgence of listening to music which transports me. Tonight it's Fleetwood Mac and the particular song that got to me tonight is "Go Your Own Way", probably my fave song by this group, written and sung by Lindsey Buckingham (with chorus by Stevie Nicks) when Lindsey found out that Stevie was having it away with Mick.

Listen to the pain,

Joanne

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Another Day In Paradise

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Here I am, fairly late at night, had maybe one wine too many, tears streaming down my face as I listen to Phil Collins' "Another Day In Paradise", a song that I love, but it always makes me feel so guilty.

The destitute woman pleads for help and the man pretends he doesn't hear and ignores her. Which of us at some time hasn't done the same? Ignored that desperate plea for help because it was too embarrassing or inconvenient, or too much trouble.

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The Ides Of March

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Much more significant than the day on which Julius Caesar got his, this is the day to celebrate our very own LAIKA'S birthday, at least in the Western Hemisphere ('cos it's the next day already where I am).

So


Happy Birthday Ronnie

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Colonoscopy

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Sometimes something comes along that you just have to share!

ABOUT THE WRITER, Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.

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Just For The Record

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Before the crowing starts I just wanted to remind a few of our cycling fanatics that Gary Wiggins, father of a certain winner (I hope) of the Tour de France, is an AUSTRALIAN,

Love'n'kisses,

Joanne

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Miss Universe Contestant

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A Canadian Miss Universe contestant has been banned from the competition after organisers found out that she had been born male.

The 23 year-old girl said she had known that she was a female at age four, had commenced hormone therapy at fourteen and finally transitioned at nineteen.

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Is Something Going On Here?

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I had sort of noticed this phenomenon in that my most recently posted story had only received a fraction of the hits which I would have normally expected, but I shrugged my shoulders and put it down to the fact that I had just not connected with the audience or I had a bad authorial day when I wrote it.

Then another author bemoaned the same effect on her latest posting and wondered if it was to do with the recent up-grade. So..I went investigating, a la Nancy Drew or Susie and Jeffrey, but more cerebrally and without the mayhem.

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Merry Christmas

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Thanks to Erin and all our administrators for another year's hard work. Thanks to all readers, authors and commentors for being here. Please keep on doing whichever it is that you do.

A Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year,

Joanne

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I Am Totally Devastated

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There is a heading in "My Accounts" which summarises the total number of kudos which a writer has received. I would jealously chortle over the hundreds of thousands (actually I have to tell the truth....a few hundred) of these precious little items every day, somewhat like Gollum with his ring....my pressshhhusss.

I WENT TO LOOK TODAY AND THEY WERE GONE! ALL GONE!

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Real Heroes

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Most of you will never have heard of Daniel Morcombe or his family. The Morcombes are a family living on the Sunshine Coast of Queensland...that's about an hour-and-a-half's drive north of Brisbane.

Daniel was a 13-year-old boy who went Christmas shopping eight years ago and never returned. He was last seen at a bus-stop on his way home. His bones and a pair of shoes have just been discovered about twenty miles away from his home in a swamp.

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Daddy Took The T-Bird Away

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I'm thinking of writing a story about a trans-girl driving a TransAM up the trans continental highway Route 66, racing a T-girl in a T-Bird dressed in a tight little Tee with Daddy's Girl embroidered on it in glitter,

Joanne

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