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Arthritis

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Apparently the angry demonstrations are taking place all over America, and who knows where else? I am of two minds about it all and my PTSD is really rearing its head. Not getting much sleep. Arthritis or Fibromyalgia is really being painful.

The Federal Troops are setting off very loud flash bangs

I worry that my legally adopted daughter has or will be deported back to Korea. I have lost track of her.

For those who pray, please do?

Gwen Brown

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An Angel takes flight again...

Sitting here at nearly four in the morning and editing stories, what joy!

Hello everyone, Alyssa here, writing more bloggy things when I should be writing stories.

Fear not, Fake it 2 is on the go, but I had to take a short break for what was INTENDED to be a quick edit of my story Angel On Her Wing with the intent of passing it to my editor for publishing. Unfortunately, I realized the first half was kinda novelaesque and the second half... novel. So I had to fix it!

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Book Promotion - Unpossible Me

We've got a new distribution channel through SmashWords and Draft2Digital so I'm trying out their coupon code system. From now to July 14, you can get Melanie Brown's new book, Unpossible Me for only $1.99 USD if bought from SmashWords. Just use coupon code DRMTS at checkout.

Let me know if this works for you --or doesn't!-- in a comment. Thanks, and I hope you enjoy the book, I helped Melanie write the novel expansion from the original novelette here on BC. :)

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Democratic lawmakers shot today…….

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When I awoke this morning, having stayed in bed later than I usually do as it is a dreary day, I checked the news and weather as is my usual habit - well, after my usual morning ablutions and grabbing my first cup of coffee anyway. The first thing I noticed was that two Democratic lawmakers, and their spouses, were shot in an obvious politically motivated execution in Minneapolis, Minnesota overnight.

Rep. Melissa Hortman and her husband were both killed, and Senator John Hoffman and his wife were both shot multiple times but as of this writing are still alive.

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Girlfoe Chapter 4

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Meet Rikki, an inspiring musician that has a chance meeting with Justin, the golden boy of her high school, who leads her to budding love and fame, only to rip the petals away, one by one.

Chapter four should be ready sometime this week.

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Thousands of Hours Recovered

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Six or eight months back Win 10 started upgrading, messing with my installed programs, wanted to correct files in MS Word on HD and Jump Drive. MS also tried to make MSEdge the internet search browser. There is no way to disable what MS was doing except go into the basic system files and alter the commands. Yanking the jum0p drive when MS started to attack because it was an older version of MS Word, I saved it and the files. The HD was at MS mercy I couldn't stop MS 10 from rewriting MS Word files there
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My upcoming post of "A Better Hand"

I'm about to post "A Better Hand" and I feel there needs to be some forewarning and explanation of the work considering it the sequel of another's work that is not readily available. The prologue follows:

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Men in Petticoats -- All In The Cards Bea’s TV Station

It seems my muse has doomed me to write continuations of other peoples work. A couple of decades ago, there were lots of authors with their own websites. I was one of them, as was Bea. Bea was a prolific author and hosted a series of websites to display her work. The most recent is, “Bea’s TV Station”, which is still up.

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Lets brainstorm this readers! PART 2

Thanks all for the input
We All did great so far BUT in this girl's case everyone seems to have piled on that she is a super hacker....nope I am writing her as a person that knows the web and the basics of on how to find the "dark web" not really busting into a system and reprogramming it

I kind of want her to have a power, a mutation or ???? that has a bit of "fight" in it so she can defend herself and others...hacking does not fill that bill. Besides I have 2 hackers in universe already, not mine BUT I can use them.

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Be careful out there

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As the world seems to spiral down into darkness, I am reminded of something Fred Rodgers said.

He said "look for the helpers"

Look for the EMTs, the nurses, the doctors, those volunteering in soup kitchens and donation depots. But also look for those doing small things like helping a neighbor clear their sidewalk or visiting a senior home. In times of cruelty, look for kindness, look for mercy.

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13 years later

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Hello everyone,

so I'm sitting in a Voice Chat on a Trans Discord and talk with some friends about my egg-sins. Of course the talk moves to my eggy TG fiction I wrote over a decade ago. I opened one of my stories here and realised how scarily self aware yet oblivious I used to be.

My freaking author avatar/self-insert did end up picking my chosen name... oops. I guess it still took more than 11 years for the egg to really crack, but hey better later than never.

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Aliens? Magic? Magic aliens!

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Buy No Foolin' by Jo Dora Webster on Kindle from DopplerPress since all sales profits go to support Big Closet Top Shelf, contributed by Jo Dora Webster.

What will Gail do when her crush, Kevin, stumbles on a device from the space pod cabinet?

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Interlude

Galaxy

Oops! forgot that this was a new recording so I should introduce myself. If you are sensing this recording, then I'm guessing that you are not one of the aliens that are native to this planet they call Earth or Terra. I'm just a normal girl born on Ceti Alpha V. My real name is Glivney, but I go by Gail on Earth. I'm stranded here with my brother Linthan who goes by Leo on Earth.

Out of the multitude of items that survived in the storage locker, you would have thought that perhaps someone might have thought to bring along a couple of spare distress beacons. Unfortunately, No.

My native life form is like a pixie, but Linthan would call himself Elven. Even if Earth were not xenophobic, my people's tenets require us not to reveal our true form. We have armbands that use some kind of technology for others to perceive us as Earthlings. We had them on before we crashed so even Aunt Emma, who took us in, hasn't seen us as we are really.

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I've been reading Crystal's 'I can't go home like this.'

I should say reading again. The first time must be 20 years ago when I thought it was wonderful, then the only thing that irritated me was overuse of the word 'also'.

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Wrapping up

Well, I have been writing quite rapidly for a few days, and I have the bulk of the content for the book following 'Mates' ready, as well as its structure. The story order is deliberate.

'Mates' will finish properly. The next book will consist of the following, in order.

Black and White
Happiness is a Warm Hound
A Colder Dish (Neil's story conclusion part 1)
Blindside
Closing Doors (Neil's story conclusion part 2)

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I am blushing like crazy

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talked my mom into coming with me to church, and several people there made a point of telling her how kind and giving I was, and she would top them by saying how much I do for her and my family.

I blushed like crazy the whole time . . .

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Writing For YouTube ???

I spend quite a lot of time watching YouTube videos. Many of them feature a stationary picture with audio narration. Fairly frequently there are errors that are easily spotted. At these times, I've said to myself "I can do better than that". There is an abundance of Crossdressing stories there.

Infrequently, I have encountered tales on YouTube that seem to be lifted right out of the pages of BCTS. I don't remember anything specific right now.

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Lets brainstorm this readers!

Lets brainstorm this readers and see who wins with the best idea for this girl from my Shadowsblades Whateley fan fics

She is Miss Imahara one of the kidnap victims in her chapter
From this story
https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/87562/shadowsblade-sc...

basic description
Speaks in a Los Angeles valley girl accent that had come back in fashion recently

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For all Gaby fans, who are also rail fans

For all Gaby (the bicycle racing champion) fans who are also interested in her adopted home, I have some new documentary video clip for you. As some of you may realize and/or remember, in June 2021 there was a huge flood in western Germany that was especially devastating for the valley of the Ahr river. Know in German as Ahrtal.

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New story up, and some encouraging news about Sharon

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So I got a new story up, and got some encouraging news about Sharon.

She went to a doctor to get medical info for applying for unemployment, and it looks like Sam will have a part time job being a aide to a young disabled man.

So double good news (I hope!)

by the way, the story is here: https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/106912/charm-ing-gift

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Flying?

If you could fly - especially if you could fly fast - wouldn't you take advantage of that ability? Say, by flying someplace to have one of your favorite foods every few days, or stunting around the rock features (natural bridges and such) of the US West and other regions, as well as perching on the tops of buildings and bridge towers? What else?

What problems could come from that? Such as getting in trouble with airlines and military facilities?

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"Captive" by Melanie Brown

I have no idea why this happens to me. My mind keeps returning to the story in the most troubling way. I like the 3rd chapter rescue the best. I think about reading it again, often. The protagonist gets a reasonably happy outcome. Many of the best, not so much.

Gwen Brown

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Funds Low - Bills Due

Money in the bank but new bills this new month. Please help if you can, it is greatly appreciated.

Hugs,
Erin

Thanks to everyone who has sent money, even when we weren't asking. We really depend on you, more than you know. :)

Thanks for any amount you can send. All contributions are very welcome. Thanks a great deal to all who have previously contributed here or paid for a membership at Patreon or Hatbox.


Many thanks!

Hugs,
Erin, Piper, Jamie, Cat, Rasufelle and the rest of the crew

Below are versions of the PayPal links.

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Emma Anne Tate

It's Kern day Emma; it's Kern Day! Where's my Kern?

Can you tell, I'm jonesing for my Kern fix?

I started this at 11, but decided to hold off until 1:30. You posted at 1:01 so you're off the hook.
:o) ;o)

Love ya, Emma. Thanks, I can eat lunch now without that anxious stomach.

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Situation Nausea

I hope that I'm not the only one here with this kind of visceral nausea about this news, although I very well might be. Imagine tens of millions of dollars of data taken, and untold numbers of years of work with that data.

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A lot of people seem to have been reading Being Christina Chase lately

No one is more surprised than me, but it sure seems like a lot of people have been reading Being Christina Chase lately. I've gotten a few very kind thank you notes, there's been some chatter on the social medias, and I still get the odd comment on BC directly.

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I'm working on something different but...

Hi All,
I'm trying to write something different from my usual, although that is quite varied already if you look at my short story as well as serials page. It's could run to a couple of parts or one longer story. I don't want to divulge too much about the outline but it should suit those who like a bit of action rather than vanilla tales of twelve-year-olds.

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Our Self Inflicted Hell

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To preface this understand a lot of people are going to be more than mad at me for posting. I'm asking Erin to delete this blog if it makes too many furious or causes too much dissertation. BCTS is the one safe harbor in life to come and enjoy time away from the real world in the imagination zone of some of the best and some of the most original writers to ever put pen to paper.

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Our Final Contestants


Okay, Here it is! Seems like I was premature about the Christmas Contest being my last! Bah Humbug!
Here is our new Current Contestants and their Entries for the May 2025 Summer Romance Story Contest! Voting will begin on Friday, May 30, at 12 am Pacific Standard Time.

We do Have Prizes too! Maybe... $750 worth...

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Transgender Persons in Sports

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Another boring article on Trans folk in sports.

https://www.cnn.com/2025/05/29/health/transgender-athletes-a...

I'm so old that I almost do not care except to say, it all depends. We all have our own opinions. For me, being MtF, I'd say the loss of Testosterone and addition of Estrogen pretty much levels the field. In the pre-pubescent when it is done, I'd say there is probably very little difference at all.

Gwen Brown

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Foxfire and Fury - To Be Discontinued.

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Due to a disagreement on something I do NOT tolerate with the people in the Whately Discord Server this series will be Discontinued.

Permanently.

I will not write in the Whately Universe and am done with it.

I had posted an image of ME that my artist who does my cover art and immediately everyone that was online on the server proclaimed it was "AI" and not hand made.

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New Shadowsblade is up....the drow are back in town

Well I am back after fighting for benefits from the feds for over a year....I won and now all is much better
(if you need to know I got a bit of nerve damage growing in both legs, been going on for over a decade and stopped most of my work in the last few years)

But I am back and will try to write a bit more, it helps to write and have something to do that is not CSR work on a home computer!

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Trying out a dancers belt

I've decided to give wearing a dancer's belt at try. Not a gaff, but a true dancer's belt.

dance belt

I've only had it on for a short time, but initially, I like it. It's comfortable and does what it claims. It holds thing up, out of the way instead of squishing them down between your legs where I sit on them and they get in the way of holding my knees together.

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Publishing Stories Again

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In this new manifestation I have a half dozen stories in the rough draft stage. The largest, "Forced 3" keeps changing like a snake with its head cut off.

I do not know what will eventually happen. Is it Dementia? Who knows.

Gwen Brown

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In Harms Way Always

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Short time back after Trump was elected, I was contacted requesting a DNA sample supposedly to track the generic makeup in the military. The premise behind the request was it would make the medical response more capable of saving lives of wounded soldiers. Not only no but Hell No as I am one of the many openly trans veterans with medical records going back..., um... to the building of the Ark. My non response didn't please and over time I received four more requests. Eventually the message got through, I'm not active and they can't make me.

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Prostate cancer in trans women

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The news about Joe Biden's prostate cancer diagnosis reminds me that most trans women still have their prostate and so could possibly get prostate cancer. Since testosterone tends to fuel the cancer that may reduce the incidence in trans women with a lower hormone level but does not eliminate it and it seems that the PSA test which is often used as an indicator of cancer may be normal in a trans woman who has early cancer.

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on the outside looking in

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So last night I dreamed I was back and school, and even though I was doing okay in class, I felt like there was a barrier between me and the other students, one I could see through, but could never cross. I would never truly connect with them, nor they with me.

That's pretty much how I felt in real life too - and I still struggle with feeling like that today.

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Emma Anne Tate

Emma Anne Tate has been a wonderful editor, critic, and writing assistant.
She is a dream come true.

You can see her fingerprints all through the Saga that began with Dan Becomes Dawn!
Trust me, all the mistakes are mine!
She taught me many nuances of writing.
She is patient, but tells you the truth.

If you are fortunate enough to have her assistance, BE ADVISED, she tells it like it is!
Not for the faint of heart or easily offended!

I'm a big fan!!

Thanks

Kathi Jo Daniels
KathiJo25

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my leg buckled twice today

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twice today my right leg buckled.

This wasn't a dislocation, just a moment where it seemed like it wasn't going to support my weight.

soon as I can, I will be calling my doctor, and meanwhile, all hugs and prayers accepted.

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Sorry, nothing to post today

I just ran out of time. I was out dormousing much of the day and I fell asleep and didn't wake in time to finish writing. I'm trying to continue my latest serial and also working on a new short story. I may do some more tomorrow but no promises, I am quite tired and have a busy week in prospect.

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The Passion: Test Drive III

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I’m getting better at using prompts for this series so the AI has been able to make a better storyline. It’s still very limited and I still need to make edits.

I’ll post chapters 1&2 tomorrow as one post.

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16 years as part of Big Closet

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So I looked at my account this morning, and realized I had actually missed my 16th anniversary of being a member of Big Closet.

Boy, its been a busy 16 years!

but besides the changes I have undergone since, one thing remains - this place is a big part of my life, and I continue to be grateful to Erin and her elves who keep this place running.

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2 dreams for the price of one

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So last night, i had 2 very different dreams.

In the first, I was back in college, and was approached to take a seat on the Student Court as one of the judges. I told the person asking me that I was concerned about my grades, since I had struggled the previous semester, but I really didn't want to become that visible, as I had apparently planned to begin dealing with my gender issues by feminizing my appearance slowly.

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Modern day slavery in big corporations?

Here is a very interesting comparison between Europe and USA regarding employee protection, and whether big corporations are engaging in modern day slavery and/or worker exploitation. I have previously seen some individual reporting regarding these corporations, and how they are running afoul of European legislation.

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Credible Gender Change

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This is non-transgender...

I just finished viewing a YouTube piece in which a male Administrative Assistant is transformed into a woman for the purpose of being a Surrogate Mother. They promise to turn him back after... but what would be the point?

An interesting concept. I'll be looking for stories like that here...

Gwen Brown

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Trump's Double TG Standards

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At one time Trump supported transgender in beauty contests. In my opinion his about face on all transgender anything including medical support comes from Musk influence whose former wife left him for a trans female and his daughter who used to be his son. I believe Musk has a lot of hatred toward transgender because of those two instances and possibly more I haven't read about.
This is Trump supporting transgender at one time before Musk friendship. I suggest reading the whole article to get a realistic felling for the support Trump was offering.

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Happy Mothers Day

Remembering Many. To the Moms who gave us birth. To the women who blessed us growing up, moms and aunties and big sisters, and even cousins and neighbors. To the grandmothers, family or friends! To those who act as moms here! All of you bless me greatly, and I am so grateful!

Happy Mothers Day!

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hospital carousal and fighting my darkness.

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so my brother had another medical crisis and went back to the hospital - only to be released later.

Meanwhile, I went and saw Thunderbolts, and all I will say is I really relate to Bob. Like him, I carry darkness that is very dangerous . . .

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14 years (and change)

Today I glanced at my profile and realized something that stopped me cold: it’s been over fourteen years since I first joined this site. Fourteen years — and change — of writing fiction, most of it revolving around one central, complicated thing: gender.

Man, I feel old.
(And I know, I know — to some of y'all here, I'm still just a spring chicken.)

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Allergies!

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I've had several medical professionals tell me this is the worst allergy season they've seen. The actually didn't have to tell me; I can feel it.

Also, for the first day or so after getting allergy shots (every two weeks) I feel very sluggish. I got my shots yesterday. Oog.

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2025 May Summer Romance Story Contest

Well, that time of year has come around again and time for another contest. What the heck you are saying? I was dying last year? How is it I am still alive. Well, let's just say I have a pocket miracle upon me.

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Supreme Court Allows Military Trans Ban

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Supreme Court allows Trump administration to enforce trans military ban

“An unprecedented degree of animus towards transgender people animates and permeates the Ban: it is based on the shocking proposition that transgender people do not exist,” they wrote.

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At last! someone on our side EFDSS

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This just posted by English Folk Dance and Song Society. (https://www.efdss.org/)

STATEMENT FROM ENGLISH FOLK DANCE AND SONG SOCIETY

Everyone is welcome at Cecil Sharp House and to participate in the activities of the English Folk Dance and Song Society.

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I had a conversation with my mom that I'm having a hard time processing

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Before I start, I have to note that my mom is a huge support for me now, but not when I was young. I honestly doubt I would be alive today if it weren't for my mom supporting me as my true self in my 20s.

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“Donny Two Dolls” is the best name ever!!

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Dumbass Donald make a comment a few days ago about how American girls might not get thirty dolls anymore, they might have to make due with two dolls and they might cost more. This was his response to retailers letting the American public know that his tariffs are going to make toys cost considerably more this coming Christmas.

Lawrence O’Donnell had an unbelievable commentary on Trump’s statement (see attached) in which he coined the name “Donny Two Dolls” - which is absolutely the best name for the Orange Asshat yet!

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The life of Riley part 22 - The final chapter

Hi everyone. I am back on here. I wanted you to know that I finally wrote the last chapter of a life of Riley. I apologize for taking so long but I have been going through some stuff I cannot mention here. If there is one thing I learned while writing this story is that when writing a multi chapter story make sure that all the parts are done and edited before you publish any parts.

"The life of Riley" and its prequel "The beginning" were not planned as a multi chapter story. It just happened this way as I was writing it and I was making my first steps on here.

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