When dealing with IDIOTS, you have to speak their language...

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OK, so I USED to be a member of a site called Geeker.com. It was touted as a FREE streaming site. When I was actually CHARGED for the service, I went online, to a "Live Chat", to try to rectify the situation. Below is the ENTIRETY of the transcript. Please note what occurs at the very end, especially. It's quite humorous!

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Ronald Bailey

Why was I charged for a FREE membership? I have e-male proof Geeker.com charged me during my 5-day free trial (which I applied for on June 8). I was charged by Geeker.com on June 9th, JUST ONE DAY later.

Chat started

Nicki joined the chat

Katrina joined the chat

Nicki left the chat

Megan joined the chat

Katrina left the chat

Megan

Hi Ronald, this is Megan. I'm happy to assist you today.

I'm sorry to hear you've received an unexpected charge to your account from us. However, I'll be happy to look in this to explain to you why you're receiving a charge and see how best I can rectify this for you.

Ronald Bailey

ok, start explaining, then.

Megan

Is the email address you provided in the pre-chat survey the email address you used to enroll in our services?

Ronald Bailey

[email protected]

Megan

Thank you, I have located your account with the name Ronald Bailey. Our records indicate that your account has been successfully disabled and all details have been removed. There are no charges to your account. The confirmation number for your deleted membership is #67164752.

Please note there is a $0.01 pending authorization to make sure your card and address details are valid. It's refunded normally within 5-7 business days.

Ronald Bailey

And there's where the problem lies. That $0.01 authorization ACTUALLY POSTED, causing my account to go into a NEGATIVE STATUS with my bank. The account has thus been frozen. My question is what is YOUR COMPANY going to do about that?
My mistake. The account now shows a ZERO BALANCE, and the account reads as CLOSED, according to my bank.

First attempt to explain the problem.

Megan

As previously mentioned Ronald, that $0.01 automatically goes back to your account.

I do apologize for the inconvenience caused to you.

Ronald Bailey

BECAUSE MY ACCOUNT REACHED A ZERO BALANCE, IT WAS CLOSED BY MY BANK. THERE'S NO LONGER AN ACCOUNT FOR IT TO GO INTO.

Second attempt, a little LOUDER...

Megan

Okay, I completely understand.

Is there anything else I may assist you with today?

Ronald Bailey

YOU HAVEN'T ASSISTED ME WITH ANYTHING.

What are you not understanding?

There's NO ACCOUNT for the money to go back into now, even if you do return it.

And, we have strike three. She's now a confirmed idiot in my book.

Megan

Your membership with Geeker has been deleted. The pending charge is reversed to you. Even though your bank has closed the account, the account, they would still be able to see the charge being reversed.

What I can suggest is that you contact your financial institution for further clarification as your account with Geeker has been deleted and you have no charges with us. You are no longer a member.

I hope that this clears things up for you.

Ronald Bailey

あなたが惑星で一番馬鹿でないならば、神様! (My God! Are you the biggest idiot on the planet?)

さようなら、愚かなおばさん (Goodbye, foolish woman.)

These are the EXACT translations from Google translate. Notice that NO rude language was used (at least no rude ENGLISH words, as they are lost in translation...)

Megan

The rude language will not be accepted via Live Chat.
Please contact your bank for further assistance.
Thank you.

Note: She actually understands (I think) the Japanese. Perhaps Google???

Megan left the chat

Chat rated Bad
Comment submitted

I found it very amusing that the only thing she actually paid any REAL attention to was when I reverted to Japanese... Amazing, huh?

Haylee V

PS: I have my laptop set up so I can switch between Hiragana / Katakana and English using ALT codes. I have A LOT of friends that I watch anime with, and most are from Malaysia, Singapore, and Japan.

Comments

Normal

Charging an account $0.01 to check to see if it's valid is a common practice, I suspect at the end of the free trial period you would have been charged a full subscription fee, the fine print on services like that usually tells you by accepting the Terms of Service (that button everyone clicks "accept" without reading the "fine print") you agree to automatic charges to your bank account.

There is a reason for my paranoia

about paying for things like this monthly.
I won't sign up for Netflix, Apple Music, Hulu, windows access (when it arrives) or anything else.
I'd prefer to do without than get into more recurring debits. It is so easy for your spending to get out of control.
The seduction of "Only $9.99 per month" is too hard for a lot of people to refuse.
As for these 'deduct $0.01' from your account... As soon as I see one of those, I cancel the service. Either take a payment for the full month or STFU.
One bank I worked with years ago flag these small deductions as suspicious. They can be used by scammers to test the water. If the $0.01 works then they'll come back and drain the account.

YMMV

Samantha

Never use a debit card to buy

Never use a debit card to buy anything. Get a credit card, and always pay the full statement balance by the due date to avoid interest. It provides a safety buffer between your money and any thief who will eventually get the number. When thieves steal credit card numbers, they are stealing from the bank, and you can dispute the charges before you have to pay. When they steal your debit card number, they are stealing from you. The bank may promise you are not at fault for fraudulent charges. But that doesn't help when your bank balance goes to zero, and your rent is due.

--Brandon Young

Yeah, I worked in a bank for 15 years

Haylee V's picture

It was a "throw-away" debit card - one you can load as you see fit, so it wasn't tied to any financial centers. I'm not THAT stupid... (at least not yet, I hope... LOL.)

The point I was making is that she didn't even BOTHER to listen; she just read her little script like a nice robot -- until I switched languages on her. I could have spoken Greek, Swahili, or even Klingon and it wouldn't have mattered, nor did what I said in these languages.

She only paid attention to me after the change, and by then, it was too late. Also, she probably just "assumed" that what I said was rude rather than take the time to actually find out what was said. I probably could have written どうもありがとうございました 名誉ある王女 ("Doumo arigatou gozaimashita meiyo aru oujo", or "Thank you very much, Honored Princess!") and gotten the same response.

*Kisses Always*
Haylee V