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A school Teacher volunteered to review two chapters of a story that is dear to my heart. "Hala's Snow Day", and "Cowgirl Hala". I knew that she was a feminist, and a radical one at the start of this. So I should have known, really.
Some of her criticism was negative because her own ignorance about Middle Eastern families. The rest of the story she simply did not agree with and while she was being honest I suppose, I had not anticipated that the gap between her understanding and my intention could be so large. In the end the most biting and hurtful comment for me was that it was "immature".
At the moment, I feel that I should never write again. And, perhaps such a biting criticism is what I needed because truthfully, I am not the most popular writer on BCTS. Maybe someone just needed to be blunt enough with me to get my attention? I won't get falling down intoxicated because I would just waken in the morning being even more depressed than I am now.
I've been working very hard on 8 more chapters, continuing the same story. Fortunately, they are all on a SSD drive, so it would be easy to throw them away.
It is doubtful that I am the first writer here to have this happen. I hurt awfully.
Gwen
Comments
Response to criticism
Please separate yourself from your writing. You are much more than your writing. Criticism is supposed to help you learn how to write better. “Immature “ writing is a subjective opinion. The only way to mature your writing is to do more of it. NOT less or none. I’ve enjoyed some of your tales. So...Polish your craft by writing more. Please.
BAK 0.25tspgirl
Please don't give up
You're one of the authors that I love to read and if you stopped, you would be missed.
Criticism
Do not take it to heart. Criticism is a product of bias and ignorance and is destructive by nature. Critiquing is a high level activity that is constructive in nature. Too many people, teachers among them, do not undertand the difference (I have the utmost sympathy for the pupils/students of this teacher based on your comments). 11 years as a University senior tutor and programme leader taught me how to critique to support my students and as a published researcher taught me how to deal with being subject to destructive criticism.
Your readers are your most useful critics, but for editing and reviewing, you need someone who knows how to critique. Your teacher does not fit into the latter category.
Thank you.
From my own very biased point of view, I thought that my story was abundantly easy to follow. For her, I suppose not.
:)
Gwen
Garden Party
Garden Party by Ricky Nelson sums it up. You see, you can't please everyone, so you gotta please yourself.
If you are writing for you, it's what matters. Choosing to share your writing with others, take the constructive criticism as your motivation to improve, and dismiss anything negative. Once you are pleased with it, your writing has satisfied you, constructive criticism can increase your satisfaction, but negative criticism is hardly ever effective, so just put it out of your mind, and writing for you some more.
Hobbled By My Own Bias.
The teacher is an Iowa Corn girl with a narrow point of view. I had thought that she would have overcome that.
I've travelled internationally a bit. And have been both devout Christian and Muslim, so perhaps my cultural base is a bit more broad.
Should have been prepared...
Thank you.
Gwen
Editing
Literally decades of writing experience has taught me that editing someone else's writings is very difficult to do especially if you cannot divorce yourself from the topic (of the paper) that you have been asked to edit. Each author has her/his own style that -- while we may not agree with it -- is their style. Grammar, spelling, punctuation, etc are technical issues that a good editor should be able to address regardless of one's appreciation of the topic. If you have a good editor that understands your work, stick with them! Just because someone teaches English does not mean they are a good writer or editor! Non illigetimii carborundum!
Quirky Writer I Suppose.
I try to teach a bit in my stories. It's been rewarding to hear Kenyans speak English with a British Accent. It was a surprise to see that Honduran culture is split between the Devout Catholic Spanish upper class, and the Apostolistic Christian Native Lower class. There were other countries also. It has been sweet and pleasant to see my College Town Portland, Oregon filled with College Students from Saudi Arabia, France, Germany, South America and lots of other countries. It fills me with happiness to see these cultures mixing and no guns either.
My stories tend to be quite international and not everyone likes that.
Thank You.
Gwen
Hi hi Gwen.
I've never read any of your stories yet. There are just so many good authors here that I have barely scratched the surface of what's available to read. But I love reading the comments you post.
I just decided to take a look and see what stories you have written and how many reads and comments they have. I got stuck on the first one, Lt Katia In Afghanistan Ch 1. It has 26 comments and 5230 views. And after reading the first few chapters I've added to the list of stories I want to read. Any stories that get that kind of response on BCTS are VERY popular here. And you got me hooked on a story in 2 paragraphs so obviously I think you can write well.
I would say that, as you yourself pointed out, your friend is not your target audience for your stories. Most of the stories written here are not the target of a "mainstream" audience, which I like to call "the lowest common denominator". It doesn't matter how many billions of people on the planet would not like your stories. What does matter is how many people do find and like your stories. That is what matters.
And what matters most of all, is do you like and enjoy writing the stories? Do you like writing and publishing them? And if and when it happens, does your heart thrill when a reader finds your stories and starts talking about how wonderful they are and how much they like them?
I hope this doesn't stop you from writing more stories. <3
My Wrong Assumption
I had assumed that because we are friends, she would get it...
She didn't.
Thanks
Gwen
Friends and family are the worst critics
Friends and family are the worst critics. They are either afraid of upsetting you and tell you its so perfect it can't be improved, or for whatever their reasoning, tell you its so bad you should never try to write again.
We the willing, led by the unsure. Have been doing so much with so little for so long,
We are now qualified to do anything with nothing.
Critiques
So, you got one (1) bad review. How many postiive reviews have you recieved right here?
You're an author. You are supposed to be a bit controversial. And, any discussion of the Middle East will be controversial.
Welcome to the club.
Now, stop bitching and feeling sorry for yourself. Get back to that keyboard and WRITE!
I'm sure all of us are looking forward to reading your next book
Red MacDonald
So, No Whining then?
Yes, Sir !
Thank you all for the support and love. I suppose that thin skin is not desirable.
Thank you.
Gwen
Understand your emotions.
Dear Gwen,
Back in the late 90s, Pre-FM, Pre-BCTS, Pre-History, I primarily wrote Dominance and Submission stuff, and posted them to the news group, alt.sex.stories.mod. At the time, there was a gal called Celeste on ASS who was apparently an English teacher, and who reviewed/graded stories. She had a triple scale, each 1 to 10, evaluating technical quality of the writing, plot development and characterization, and appeal to the reviewer. She ran a contest in 1997 where the stories were to be about Virtual Sex. I wrote a fairly hardcore, femdom/bdsm story that I shared with several online groups into that genre and received very positive responses, and some help with proofing glitches I'd missed. Then I submitted it for consideration in the contest.
I got an 8, 4, 2 and was devastated. I was working on my dissertation at the time, and all modesty aside, I was a damn fine technical writer and felt gypped by the 8. the other scores just blew me away and I felt I had somehow really messed up. I mean, Celeste was like, a professional, right?
Vickie Tern wrote me and told me the story was fine; it was just Celeste was the wrong audience. After trading emails with Vickie and 'talking' it out, I went back and critically read the posted review. There really was nothing substantive in her comments, other than that she could not accept and did not want to read about a relationship as portrayed in my story, and her disbelief that anyone would even consider such behavior. Further, her own grade of 2 in personal appeal should have told me she wasn't objective in any part of the review.
So, the lessons learned are: Know your audience. Don't send your detailed treatise on evolution to a group that supports intelligent design, and don't expect the nice lady English teacher who loves sweet and sentimental, in the dark sex to like what I was writing back then.
Second, read the comments (assuming there are any. "this sucks" can be disregarded!) carefully and critically. Ensure the reviewer is finding valid fault with your craft and not with your choice of subject. I could have lived with a 9,9,2, and that would have been an objective evaluation in spite of her distaste for my subgenre, but that is not what her detailed review comments said.
It's hard, because there is always pride of authorship, and very often, we are sharing something deeply personal when we write, but as others have said, it's only one comment. And from what you said, not a very well informed one to boot.
Warm furry hugs!
Tigger
Perhaps You Hit On the Problem?
I remember reading stories on that site. :) Female dominance was a thing for me for a while, having come out of a 39 year marriage that I thought I failed in, so needed punishment.
It is fairly evident that I am in many respects a subbie. My friend is not at all and is a voyeur. My characters can be extremely aggressive but it drains them and I also. Even my latest story, "Balmoral" is that way, it just comes out.
So, I probably won't use her to review my stories again.
Thank you.
Gwen
"review my stories again"
Yay! More stories. (OK, I admit it. I'm a glutton for more good stories. It's usually near the top of my thoughts when I post on BCTS.)
I'm glad you are feeling somewhat better about this now.
your writing
I for one think that your stories are very good as for my own writing lets just say it needs life support to hold up to your work.
Dawn Smith 1972