The Nightmare After Boxing Day!
by Andrea Lena DiMaggio
Jack felt groggy...did he drink too much Christmas punch? Reveling until three AM usually worked for him, but for some reason he felt...odd? He tried to sit up, but his muscles seemed to betray him.
"Oh...I don't think you're quite ready for that. You should just lay quietly for a while until you've recovered."
The voice seemed almost disembodied. He would have laughed at the joke, but his head began to throb; the result of too much punch indeed. With very little that still worked, it was too bad that his head ended up aching. Another attempt to sit up was met with the same frustration.
"You just insist, don't you?" The voice was playful; almost teasing.
"You're quite well, actually. No need for anything; the effects of the drink will wear off soon, and you'll be able to get up...walk around...Oh I am so looking forward to that!"
He would have shaken his head in confusion, but the throbbing reminded him to sit still...for quite a while...
Much later...the haze began to lift...
"Oh, I see you're awake again. Mustn't arise too quickly, my dear. You've had a long long sleep! Out for days." She giggled.
"Sleep? Days?" Jack looked up through the skylight and saw that the moon had changed phases. He went to stand up, placing his hands behind him. He was on a bed of some sort, and there were covers and blankets and quilts of all sorts entangling him. But when he stood up, the blankets and quilts clung to him...almost like a....gown?
"Oh, goody...you've found out my surprise. I hope you like it." The voice laughed. Where had he heard that voice before? Scary and soothing at the same time. It came to him.
"Yes, Jack...it's me!"
"Oh...Sally...what's going on. Why do I feel so strange?" He shook his head. That voice...his voice? It sounded so...odd."
"Nothing is going on, Jack. I'm just here with you, happy to be with you...doing what I can to make you happy. I do make you happy, don't I Jack?"
"Of course..." He stopped talking...that wasn't his voice, was it?
"And now, I've finally been able to grant you your fondest wish, Jack...Don't you like your surprise?" She laughed almost manically but with a hint of affection.
"I gave you your fondest wish, Jack." She stepped out of the shadows.
"Sally? I feel strange...something's wrong...different...what's wrong?" Jack began to panic.
"Oh, nothing at all, Jack. Nothing at all. Here...look for yourself." She handed him a mirror. He screamed....
"NOOOOOO.....NOOOOOO.....What have you done...Why...Sally....Why????"
"Oh Jack...don't be silly...don't you remember?"
"I asked you what you wanted for Christmas this year and you said...and I quote,'Sally? If it's the last thing I do, I'm going to get into your panties.' Now don't you feel silly. Merry Christmas, Jack! Champagne?"
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