Chapter 6

We continued moving downward for almost an hour, eased left onto a flattened area for several hundred yards and then sharply right again, taking us down at a very steep angle.

"There's a creek at the bottom of this drop, just past this line of trees. Slide here any further and you'd probably be taking a dip in the drink." He smiled, showing his white teeth. "Not that I'd mind seeing you take a swim."

I wondered to myself about his comment, whether he wanted me to fall in because he would be amused at seeing me soaking wet. Or was it that he was dwelling on the thought of seeing me wet, forced to have to remove my clothing and allow it to dry, putting me in a compromised position?

The whole time we walked down that mountainside toward his traps, I thought about both him and me. Here I was, suddenly transformed into a female, alone on this mountain with an adult male. True to his word, he had not tried to make an advance at me, but how long could he hold out a natural reaction to having his way with a smaller, helpless female? How long would he be able to resist the temptation of our proximity? Would I be able to defend myself if he should try?

Slowly those thoughts of being forced into God only knows what, began to become replaced with others. It was these other thoughts that disturbed me more than anything else.

What would it be like if I had been actually BORN into this body? Under the same conditions, would a female me be attracted to a big mountain of a man like Kodiak? He did have his points - he was quite tall and solidly built. I'm sure that a handsome face lurked somewhere under that crazy looking beard.

From time to time he would pause and glance back, making sure that I was still following him. Behind him, from this vantage I could see what his wife must have seen in the big man. He was stunningly well-proportioned, narrow at the hip with powerful legs. I wondered what it was like for her to make love to him? Was he gentle or was he rough? Did he just hammer away at her like a beast of the forest, or did he 'make love' slow and easy? Did he stroke her mind as much as he stroked her insides?

"Whew, I'm warm!" I thought aloud.

"What?" he asked, glancing over his shoulder for a split second.

"Nothing," I replied flatly, ashamed that I had uttered anything at all.

Suddenly, without warning I fell to my bottom and began sliding in the leaves and soft earth! Because of the severe angle, I began to pick up speed rapidly! It happened so fast that all I could do was let out a short squealing scream! Kodiak was about ten feet in front of me when I fell; as he heard me, he quickly turned to try and stop my aggressive sliding.

I collided into him even before he had time to prepare, and my face struck him solidly in the crotch, collapsing him quickly forward and then backward as I took out his legs. Both of us were careening down the hill, him on his back and me on my bottom. The whole way down I squealed like the girl I had become!

He tried in vain to check his fall as he slid, but he was unable to grasp a tree or bush in his journey. Fortunately for us, he was able to cast off his pack as we headed toward the water. He ended up plowing into a shallow spot of the stream, sending a huge wall of water all the way to the other side.

As I raced unchecked, I tried to dig my heels into the earth to prevent the embarrassing situation of joining him. My heels finally were able to dig in at the water's edge, thanks to a root which was spanning across the ground. However, my momentum carried me forward until I fell head first behind Kodiak!

When I finally stopped, my face was firmly planted in his crotch. While I quickly scrambled to my hands and knees in embarrassment, Kodiak began laughing. His booming laughter echoed throughout the forest that surrounded us. In the situation that I found us in, positioned as we had been, knowing how we arrived at this point, I couldn't see the humor in it at all, and I was very upset!

But I said nothing, and I finally climbed to my feet using his knees for support, stood up and folded my arms in the knee-deep water. "You going to get up, or just lay in the water laughing at me!"

He sat up, shaking the water from his hair. "I guess I should be asking you if you're all right?"

"I'm wet and I'm cold!" I growled, shivering.

This comment started him laughing all over again, "Water and winter has that sort of effect on a person!"

"So...do we head back up to the cabin?" I asked, looking up the steep hill and the trail toward his home.

"We're wet. You're cold, and you would probably never make it up that incline...and if you did, by the time we got back, we'd both be so sick we'd most likely die."

"Then what should we do?" I began wading toward the shore, lifting the skirt as best I could; the dress was now heavily soaked with water. Kodiak stood and followed me, helping me climb back onto dry land.

"There's a clearing not far from here, we can build us a fire at that place." He climbed back up the incline for a short way, and then returned with his pack. "I've got what we need here; we'll have you dry and warm in no time, Lauren."

I followed him miserably into the clearing, and together we shivered as we picked up dry branches and twigs for a fire. He unwound the cord from his pack and opened it up. The pack contained a small bow and what looked like a bird's nest. I watched as he began drawing the bow through a stick, vigorously back and forth he went until I saw a tiny spire of smoke rise up. In moments, he transferred a glowing coal into the bowl of the bird nest. Blowing on it for several minutes, it began smoking and leapt into a flame.

That nest was placed on the ground where he began adding tiny sticks and twigs. Those twigs quickly took hold and we were able to add larger branches, increasing our fire until it began putting off modest amounts of heat.

He placed the contents of the pack beside a log and finished unrolling it until it dawned on me that it was much bigger than I originally thought. The hide, whether it was a bear or buffalo, I was unsure...was huge when spread out.

He motioned me over and held up a corner, "Climb in, and take off your clothing."

"I will not!" I gasped.

"You'll be under the blanket." He shrugged, "Nobody will see your woman parts!"

I could feel the breeze picking up; the trees overhead were swaying slightly. The air was like a knife, slicing its way deep into my body. I groaned and slid under the blanket, quickly removing and tossing my clothing in the grass beside us. Each item, he took and hung it near the fire upon a bush, until I no longer had anything to remove. After he knew that I was done, he began to remove his own wet shoes and stockings.

My eyes grew wider as his shirt was removed. "What are you doing?"

"If you didn't realize it, Lauren, I'm wet and cold too!" He hung his shirt on another bush not far from the fire. "It's okay with you if I'm warm too, isn't it? The last thing either of us needs out here, is for ME to be sick!"

My mouth dropped open in shock as he removed his drawers, standing entirely naked. He hung them onto the branches and walked back like he had not a care in the world. His swinging penis was entirely exposed, and open for inspection to my eyes! I turned my head away and felt a shiver race along my spine, through my breasts and deep into my crotch! To say that he was impressive would have been an understatement; I could honestly say beyond a shadow of a doubt...it was entirely in proportion with his large frame.

My face grew warm as he began dropping larger logs onto the fire, building it up even more than before. After he was satisfied, he headed over to the hide and crawled under it, beside me entirely naked and before I could protest.

"Bet this was the furthest thing from your mind when you woke up this morning?" he laughed. "I know it was the furthest thing from my mind." He stretched out his legs and covered his lap with the hide. I felt my face growing warmer, knowing that here I was, now a naked female...in very close proximity to a naked man!

"Well, it could be worse," he added, his voice breaking the stillness of our situation.

"How?" I snapped back.

"We could both be male," he laughed. "At least this way, it's a comforting thought that at least one of us is a female."

"Not by choice," I sighed. "I'd rather be here, in this situation, as the guy."

Kodiak smiled, "Well, lucky for me you aren't."

I said nothing; my mind however was strangely fixated upon the fact that beneath this hide, we were both entirely nude. I also kept thinking that when a man and a woman were this close and also unclothed...there usually was more involved than just sitting beside one another like we were, trying to stay warm. I almost expected Kodiak to roll over and pin me beneath his great size, taking me and truly making a woman of me.

That thought simply terrified me, yet part of it caused a slight thrill in my body as well. That thrill made me aware of my vulnerability to him. If he wanted, he could overpower me in an instant. I trembled and pulled the blanket higher to my chest, trying to block every vestige of my femininity from his male eyes. Under the blanket, I was aware of his hairy legs as they brushed against my smooth skin. It was both frightening and thrilling at the same time, knowing that the organ that could create a dramatic change in my body lay not far from its natural, unprotected opposite.

In my mind I imagined it slowly stiffening and straining upward, nothing between him and myself other than thin air. I thought about it being pushed into my own strange opening, pumping my body full of the seed that would create a child. Suddenly, his voice broke through my strange thoughts, "You need any more room...or you just planning on pushing me from under the hide?"

I realized as he spoke, that my legs were spreading wider, almost as if I were trying to accommodate an unseen lover! My knee was lying over his large thigh! I quickly pulled it away from his body where our skin had come into contact with each other.

"Shit," Kokiak sighed.

"What? What is it?" I asked looking around.

"Nothing," he whispered, drawing his knees slightly higher. "Stop moving around."

"I'm just lying here, minding my own business," I replied, straightening the hide so it continued to cover my body.

"Your leg was on mine again," he snapped, highly unusual for him.

"Why should that make any difference?" I asked, again pulling the hide back over my exposed thigh.

"Are you trying to do that to me on purpose?" he growled.

"If you'd tell me what the heck I'm doing...I'll stop it right away!" I shot back, looking him directly in the eye.

His eyes wavered only slightly, darting down for a fraction of a second. I glanced downward, and noticed that the soft globes of my breasts were well hidden. But my cleavage was not hidden, and Kodiak shifted uncomfortably because as I pulled the hide higher, I exposed my left thigh once again.

"You're killing me!" he sighed again, softly under his breath.

"Believe me; I'm not trying on purpose!" I sat as still as possible, it finally dawning upon me as to what I was doing to him. Kodiak was becoming aroused at being so near my naked body. The innocent glimpses of my flesh were causing him great anguish and discomfort.

The fact that it was ME that was causing all of this to a huge man was almost powerful in nature. I had all of the control in this current situation, I could drive him crazy and there was nothing he could do about it! Well, unless he physically took control. No, the mental torture was all mine, and it pleased me immensely!

I allowed the hide to fall to the inside of my thigh, my smooth leg visible once again to his eyes. From my peripheral vision, I could see him close his eyes and looked away. Acting as if I didn't notice, I left it exposed; his eyes glanced back not once but several times. Deep inside, I was sure that this was having an effect on him.

"Can you please cover yourself up?" he asked softly, but with growing irritation in his voice.

Inwardly I smiled. "I'm sorry." I reached over and pulled it back to cover my leg, this time allowing the hide to fall, almost exposing my nipples. Beside me, he sucked air through his teeth as he quickly took in this vision. So he wouldn't think I knew of my power over him, I quickly drew it back up to my neck.

"The fire's dying down. We need a few more logs thrown on there," I observed, smiling inwardly at his misfortune.

"It'll last," he replied.

"I don't think so. Most of it is just glowing coals. You probably need a greener log to throw on there...like the one to your right," I added.

"If I get out from under this blanket, you're going to see something that will probably scare the hell out of you," he whispered, his low voice was ragged.

"I've already seen you naked. Remember when you climbed under here?" I added, "Remember, I was once a guy, so what you have doesn't do anything for me."

"Fine," he growled and tossed aside the hide, turning away from me he stood up and walked to the log. Bending down, he gathered it up and tossed it on the coals.

"Are our clothes dry yet?" I asked, realizing that he could check while he was out.

As he turned, it granted me full view of his front. His caution to me about 'Scaring the hell out of me’ came to mind. His penis had to have been close to ten inches in length...and he was right, what I had done did scare the hell out of me! I couldn't pull my eyes from him; its view caused a strange reaction in my own body, so strange that I couldn't understand its meaning. I could feel my nipples suddenly stiffen, and a strange flutter race from them into my own nether region. This wasn't possible...I couldn't become attracted to Kodiak! I was a guy...or at least used to be one!

Then it dawned on me: I was stupidly arousing a male twice my size, and acting like the female I had become! No longer could I lay claim to being a guy ever again. "What was I thinking?" I whispered to myself as he turned and walked back to the hide, his stiff penis swinging straight out and upward from his body.

"Happy now?" he growled as he crawled back under the hide, uncomfortably trying to adjust himself of his…problem.

"I...I'm sorry," I stammered, ashamed for causing that reaction to him.

"I'm not going to deny it, I find you extremely attractive...but..." he groaned as it pushed the hide upward, letting there be no mistake that he was aroused.

"But what?" I asked, completely hidden from the shoulders down under the furry hide. I was afraid of my response to his comment. Why SHOULD I even care what he thought of me? It didn't make sense!

"You're just a kid. I'm a good 10 or 15 years older than you...and damn it, you've got me as hard as a pond in January! It's just damned disgusting!"

I snapped back, "What the heck is that supposed to mean? You somehow think that just because I'm younger, that I can't be satisfying to an old fart like you?" I tightened my jaw and slugged him as hard as I could on the arm, the motion causing my breasts to sway. "Frankly, I wouldn't let you near me with a ten foot pole.

You're the idiot sporting the penis, if it's hard, that's your own damn fault!"

"My fault?" he growled, "Quit your damn exposing of yourself and maybe I wouldn't get like this!" He pointed to the bulge in the hide.

I leaned back against the log and gave him a dirty glare, "Fine. So it's all my fault, is it?" I pushed down the covers and gave him a good look at my breasts. "There. Now you've seen them, quit fantasizing about them!"

"Shit..." he hissed, rolling his eyes away from me. "If you were only a mite older, I'd take you and put you in your place!"

"What place is that, Kodiak, right here!" I fumed, grabbing his penis from under the blanket. He quickly looked downward as I held him, both of us too shocked for words!

My mind screamed, 'what am I thinking? I'm a young female just past my seventeenth birthday...with an adult male's stiff penis firmly in my grasp!' In an attempt to save face, I gave him a rough pull, trying to show him that even though I may be small, I still had the power.

"Don't!" he exclaimed with a tremble racing through his body. "You don't know what you're doing." To prove my point, I gave him another full tug. His eyes closed, and I watched his jaw flex slightly. Then, before I knew it, he pushed my hand away. I took it as though I was being attacked and threw myself at him. In our struggle I found myself upon his lap. In his own defense, he grabbed my shoulders and tried to push me back. Our struggle caused his engorged penis to enter my body ever so slightly! We both stopped moving instantly, afraid that any movement, one-way or another, would cause a reaction that neither wanted!

"Don't move!" he grimaced. "What the heck are you thinking, Lauren?"

"I...I was excited about the power I held over you. I didn't intend for this to happen!"

"Get up slowly...carefully," he stammered, sweat beading his brow.

"Ri...right." I tried to draw a foot under myself, as I planted the weight, I could feel myself slipping. "Oh, no!"

In an instant, my leg went forward causing me to fall backward onto him, forcing his penis deeper into me!

"Are you intentionally this accident prone, or does it come to you naturally?" The look on his face was of both shock and amazement.

"Don't you dare do anything!" I cried as I cringed, one leg straight out, the other was locked under his hip in an awkward position.

Ever since this transformation had happened to me, I've been denying that my body was female. Now there could be no doubt...slowly, under the weight of my own body, I could feel myself sliding down onto Kodiak. Deeper and deeper he penetrated me with his penis, as a result of my stupid feminine lubrication. Down I slid, until I was seated at his penis' powerful base.

"Dear God, don't move!" I pleaded.

"Tell me about it! I'm buried into you all the damn way, and it's all your fault!"

"I'll just pull up. I can do it quickly enough!" I said hopefully.

"I'm too near! Don't you dare move!" He winced slightly, as if he was trying to concentrate upon controlling himself. "One move could place both of us in a position that one of us ain't going to be happy being in. So...unless you want a child, DON'T MOVE!"

"I don't want to become pregnant...I...I don't want a baby!" I cried, trying to hold myself up upon my one knee. "Maybe if we can hold like this long enough, you'll go down and nothing will happen!"

"Easier said than done! It's been years since I've been alone with a female...in this way! You go moving around too much and I won't be able to prevent myself from parking my seed!" He placed his hands upon my elbows, holding me from any further movement. We sat like that for what seemed like hours, like some erotic sculpture in a museum somewhere in France.

I could feel his hand slipping, "You're losing your grip!" I whispered, panic-stricken.

All at once, his hand fell onto my breast causing him to open his eyes. I fell forward, both hands swung outward beside his head, catching myself only inches from his face. "Just great," I sighed.

"You okay?" he asked, his hands now resting upon my breasts, trapping them between our bodies.

"You still holding it?" I asked, hopeful that he hadn't expelled into me.

"Yeah, maybe you're right...try and quickly get off of me. I'll see if I can hold out that long." He looked overhead, staring into the trees for concentration. As I began working my leg from under him, I felt a strange little quiver in my stomach. It was a pleasurable feeling that seemed to be concentrating between my breasts and groin. Another movement of my leg and it did it again, this time making me gasp.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "Hurry up and get off of me!"

Again I moved slightly and it was as though all hell broke loose. The feeling raced throughout my body, causing my breath to be crushed from within. I fell forward onto my elbows, my lips forced into Kodiak's. Again the strange feeling coursed through my extremities, maintaining focus deep within my loins.

I couldn't even begin to deny what the strange little pulses were doing to me; each one was stronger than the last, growing and building until I could no longer control my strange actions. I began to shake uncontrollably, and the results caused an enormous effect on Kodiak.

"Get up! Get up QUICKLY!!" he urged.

My hips rotated slightly forward, and then returned again. It began as a slight, almost nonexistent movement, and then grew with tiny intervals until I found myself rocking slowly, almost uncontrollably upon his penetrating organ. What was causing this reaction of mine? Why could I no longer force myself away from him?

I could feel Kodiak's large hands move to my back, as my legs fell to each side of his hips. Faster and faster I felt my hips shift until I was grunting softly in his ear. Panting and trembling I laid my head upon his huge chest. The rocking continued for only a few more seconds, I felt Kodiak's back shake and he began to softly gasp. Even before I realized what was happening, he began to send his seed deeply into my womb! Again and again I felt him expel his life-giving contents into me. Finally, he grew still, only a spasm or two reminding me of what had just happened.

"Now we did it," he sighed. I raised myself up slowly, with him still buried deeply inside of me. I didn't want to move, because I was too afraid and confused to climb off. "What were you thinking?" he asked, stunned.

I watched my tear fall onto his chest. I wiped it away, "I...I...don't know what came over me!" I cried. "I...was trying to climb off and then...my body just seemed to take over."

I carefully removed myself from his chest and sat back down, drawing the hide over my body. "I...I'm so sorry."

He sat quietly for several minutes. "Do you realize just how much trouble you could've just gotten me into?"

"You?" I gasped. "I could become pregnant from what you just did to me!"

"Now wait a cotton picking minute here! If you remember, you went all crazy on me and were the one who initiated all of this into happening!" he scolded. "I was the one who was trying to get you to stop!"

"You could have pushed me away!" I shot back.

"And have you getting hurt on me! Not on your life!" He folded his arms against his broad chest and glared back.

Again we both grew quiet, the minutes slowly rolled by. Finally I spoke without looking up at him, "It...that was my first time you know...as well...anything."

Kodiak only grunted his response, I continued. "Maybe we didn't do it right..."

He laughed. "Lauren, there are only a few natural ways of doing what we just did...it was right. What happened...happened."

"When will we know?" I asked innocently. "Will it be soon?"

"Soon enough!" he sighed. "If you become in the family way, we'll probably know in the next few weeks. When my own Ma had my little brother, she put two and two together when she begun missing her monthly cycles. Then, she knew for sure when she was spewing almost each and every morning. That lasted for a few weeks until finally settling down. She didn't really show, but Pappy didn't have a clue until she told him that she was pregnant. Ma knew first, seems like the women folk usually do...so I'd guess you'll know if you're pregnant long before I ever will."

"What will happen to me now?" I cried.

"I'm not one that cuts and runs at the first sign of trouble! You'll stay until we know for sure one way or another!" He quickly glanced at me then he looked away.

"And if I don't get pregnant?" I whispered.

"We'll count our blessings and move on." His response was soft and caring.

I swallowed hard, "And if I do find out that I'm pregnant?"

He sighed deeply, "Same as before...we'll count our blessings and move on."

His words were vaguely reassuring. We both grew quiet for several more minutes, each deep in thought as to what had just happened. Finally, Kodiak gave me a nervous smile. "What will we tell everyone if we do find out that you're pregnant?"

I shrugged, still in shock with what I had just done. "If...if I am, I don't want the child to know."

"Know?" He wondered aloud, "Know whether it was conceived out of wedlock or that the whole blooming thing was some type of bizarre accident!"

"I..I guess both..." I stammered.

Again he grew quiet for a long period of time, "Well then, if that happens...I guess you'll be staying here on my mountain, but...as my wife." I turned to look at him in complete shock, but he held his hand out as if to prevent my speaking of it further as he continued. "I'm not going to push a kid of mine away and into an orphanage like what had happened to that other gal that ended up here last year! I sure as hell ain't going to dump it off like your folks did you...I ain't never going to let something like that happen to a kid of mine!"

Again the silence between us grew deafening. Finally, Kodiak blew his breath out slowly. "I'd be a liar if I said that what just happened between us, was an unpleasant experience for me." Again I looked up at him, "It's true. Accident or not, any guy would give his eye teeth to have a chance at a beauty such as yourself." He swallowed slowly, "Th...thank you...I guess."

I caught myself staring intently into the glowing coals of the fire, "I...I think I understand. It was strangely the same for me too."

He immediately stared at me, and I could feel his gaze upon my face. "I can't understand what I did, let alone how I did it...but deep down, somewhere inside of me, I found a strange sense of enjoyment from what happened!"

He looked down at the hide. "I know I'm a big guy and all, but...uh...please tell me that I didn't hurt you too much."

I could feel my face grow warm; I was sure that it was red. "No - nothing happened that was unpleasant."

He nodded and rubbed his large hand over his beard. "It isn't going to bug you that you could be stuck with an 'old fart' like me?"

I closed my eyes and shook my head, "No...I don't think so, I knew a man in town who was married to a younger girl. Who would have thought that I'd ever be that young girl...damn." I sat quietly for a few minutes. "Does our age difference bug you?"

He smiled. "As I said before, most guys my age would give their eye teeth to have a young, pretty wife! Besides, I can shave off my beard to make me look a mite younger. And Lauren, if you and I do get hitched, I promise that I won't do anything unless you want it."

I felt like crying, but nodded and whispered, "Thank you, Kodiak."

Chapter 7

We returned to the cabin the very next morning; our ordeal had driven much of my 'sass' from my body. What I had been through reminded me that I never really had control at all, even though I had originally thought I held some kind of 'power' over Kodiak.

I felt broken; I knew that my spirit had been dealt a major blow. I had been transformed into a woman, and been forced to dress like one. Even the feminine response of my new sex was now something that I possessed, although it was performed like some Goony Bird's landing. That was the one thing that I couldn't lay claim to, and I never really wanted to be able to lay a claim to graceful sex with a man. No, I didn't care for that to ever happen to me again as long as I could help it!

For more than a month I waited for the other shoe to drop. I kept questioning myself each morning as to whether I felt anything at all. Each time I responded to myself that I felt completely fine.

"Maybe I'm not pregnant after all," I told Kodiak.

He nodded. "Could be. I'd give it a couple more weeks, though."

He was right - I'd better not get my hopes up too much. I imagined that with other women, pregnancies could each be as different as the females that had them. I only knew that I wanted to be neither one...female or pregnant.

For a change, I was up early and readying the coffee for Kodiak. There was a December chill in the air as he lumbered down the steep stairs and took my offered cup. "Thanks," he groaned sleepily.

"What are you planning on doing today?" I asked as I began kneading the dough I had prepared while the coffee was on. I had decided to just settle in and help; being a woman regulated the chores that had now become mine in our strange relationship.
Almost three full months had passed, and I didn't remember having any of the seasonal bleeding that I always thought came with pregnancy. Being a woman was entirely confusing, my bleeding or lack of it, left me feel slightly reassured that I wasn't ill, but still didn't answer the questions I had. Since I seemed to feel healthy enough now, I simply assumed I wasn't with child.

I was still too embarrassed about what had happened between us to say anything to Kodiak, and we avoided the issue altogether. Sometimes I wished that there was another woman upon Kodiak's mountain. A seasoned female who I could take my questions to, a woman who could let me know if I was or wasn't pregnant. I cringed, recalling that I had just used the term 'another woman' in my thoughts, almost admitting to myself that I had been changed and was most likely stuck like this forever. I looked down at the floor, sadness filling my thoughts until Kodiak spoke.

He yawned and picked at some cornbread from last night. "Well..." he began as he rubbed his smooth face; shaving off his beard had removed several years from him. He had promised he would shave his beard so that he would appear younger...in the event that I did find I was in "the family way". What had possessed him to shave anyway was beyond me. Yet, I thought to myself that he looked much more handsome, without the wild beard that once grew there. "I'll...uh... be checking my traps. The weather's holding out...but that won't last long, I figure."

I smiled, "You won't mind it then, if I don't go along?"

He laughed and shook his head. "No, that's fine...it'll be safer that way. I should be back before dark." He slowly stood and downed the last of his coffee, then returned his cup to the table. He then placed several pieces of cornbread into a linen cloth and headed for the door. "Be careful, I'll see you when I get back."

"You be careful too!" I replied as he closed the door. When the room grew silent, I sighed deeply and continued to work the dough.

After several hours, it had risen enough and was now in the oven baking. While it had been rising, I busied myself with a few other chores. One of them was with a few items of clothing that needed repairing. Seeking out a needle and thread, I began my mending. Over the course of the last several weeks, I had taught myself to sew. It wasn't a chore that I cared for, but it proved to be necessary, and was a great task to take my mind off of other matters.

I sat quietly sewing in Kodiak's rocker, humming a tune that I remembered from childhood. Glancing out of the window at the cold landscape I shuddered from the chill, thankful that I at least had a roof over my head. In the small room, the scent of the baking bread permeated the cabin and was smelling wonderful.

After repairing two of Kodiak's huge shirts, I began to mend one of the many everyday dresses that I had been forced to wear since I arrived. After I made a few stitches on the side seam, the dress was repaired.

I worked throughout the day, only stopping to keep after my baking. Thankfully, my second batch was now in the oven. As I was returning to my clothing pile, I picked up the mended items and began folding them. One by one I continued until I had two separate piles...one his...one my own.

After placing each folded pile on the bed, I was struck at how many dresses were actually in my pile. As I thought back to the mending I slowly returned to the dwindling stack of those still needing repair and picked up the next one. It too was another dress that Kodiak had given me to wear; again a seam had loosened and it needed repair.

I felt my eyes being drawn back to the pile on the bed, then again to what I held in my lap. Slowly I felt at one of the seams on the dress I was currently wearing. "Oh...shit!" I whispered.

Even the seams on the dress I was currently wearing were giving way! "Oh, God. Please don't tell me!" I pushed the sewing off of my lap and onto the floor, in a panic I began to pull off the dress. Within several minutes, I stood in the cabin wearing only my underclothes, shaking with fear at what I was realizing.

"Strained seams..." I whispered aloud, "...that means I've been getting larger in the middle. But that's silly, I haven't gotten bigger anywhere else..." Panic slowly began to bubble in my mind as I felt the surface of my belly with a trembling hand, "I...I can't be...pr...pregnant," I sobbed softly. "Where were my warnings?" I cried. "I thought I was supposed to have morning sickness or some such thing?"

I fell onto the bed and cried as I have never cried before. Kodiak's comment about a woman being the first to know came rushing back into my mind like a runaway train. I was doomed, stuck in this body...and now I was certain that I was pregnant!

Chapter 8

Kodiak walked in as the shadows outside grew long. I was sitting at the rocker while potato soup sat bubbling in the pot on the stove. "Smells pretty tasty." He crossed to the wall of pegs where he took off his thick coat. "Is this potato soup that I'm smelling?" He took a quick peek into the pan as he walked back toward me.

He paused, a concerned washed through his voice as he studied me. "You okay?"

My hand trembled as I wiped a tear from my cheek, "I'm pregnant!" I said with a finality that was much like a door closing. "You said that I'd know...well...I know."

He knelt beside the rocker, engulfing my tiny hand with his own. "Is it that bad?"

"I...I'm scared, I'm really scared!" I sputtered, and then I began to bawl. He hugged me and rubbed my back tenderly.

"I'm here, I'll help you." His voice was soft, filled with kindness and concern.

"I know...I know you will, but it doesn't make all of this any easier." I wiped away another tear. "I know nothing of being a mother; I barely even knew my own mother."

I gently pulled my hand from his and stood up. He followed, standing to his full height and towering over me. Kodiak gathered me in a hug as I began to sob into his chest, while he silently caressed my back with his huge hand. After several minutes, I pushed away and took a deep breath. "Come on, supper's going to be ruined if we don't eat."

He stood watching me and then slowly followed me to the table, "You take a seat. You've got enough to think about without waiting on me," he whispered with emotion as he pulled out my chair and waited for me to sit down. I said nothing as I watched him set the pot of soup on the trivet in the middle of the table.

"The bread," I softly managed to say.

He sat down and slowly slid his hand over to mine, "I'd be lying if I didn't say that I'm tore by the news. Part of me wants to scream it to the rafters...part of me is desperately embarrassed...part just..."

I looked at his hand; his thumb was stroking the back of my own. "Part just wants to hold you...and somehow make this all better."

My voice became no louder than a whisper, ragged with emotion and fear. "What will we do?"

"Lauren," he said as I was wiping the tears away with my free hand. "Lauren," he repeated louder until I looked him squarely in the eye. "We'll do all right. You'll see."

I stared at the bowl before me, wiping away the tears that collected in the corner of my eyes. "Where were the signs I was supposed to get? I thought women were supposed to get nauseous when they were pregnant?"

"Are you completely sure you're pregnant? When did your monthly cycle stop?" Kodiak asked, trying I assumed, to figure out how far along I was.

"Stop?" I gave him a quick glance. "I thought they started WHEN you were pregnant?"

"You have been having a woman's cycles, haven't you?" He raised his eyebrows in concern.

"I did have them right after I came here to the mountain, but they were sort of spotty and I really didn't know much about them." It embarrassed me to be talking of something that had to do with my body. Under the circumstances though, I felt it was warranted. "They stopped right around the time when we went to check your traps."

"And you haven't had them since then?" He rubbed his chin, and looked at the floor.

"Just after that...not since early fall...why?" I was hopeful that he knew more than I and I wasn't truly pregnant.

"If you were older and a might more seasoned, that would have been your first clue. That's one of them signs that women folk are always looking for. If your monthly cycle stops…most likely you're pregnant. I just keep forgetting you never had a mother around you to teach all of those girly things."

Those words rang out like a bell, reverberating inside my head over and over. "My signs...I'm supposed to bleed, regular...every month? You...you didn't tell me that!"

"I didn't know how much you knew...or didn't know about YOUR OWN body! You're young; sometimes I hear that young women don't have a regular cycle...damn...pregnant." His frown slowly began to turn into a smile. "We're pregnant! I'm going to be a daddy?"

He could smile, but for me, my entire world was crashing down around my ears. Try as I might, I couldn't hide the fear and anguish that enveloped me. I gently removed my hand from his tender grasp and pulled it back to my lap, "We...we best be eating...before it gets cold."