When you cry I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
The breeze was cool if a bit uncomfortable. Two figures sat on a bench overlooking the large pond; separated by eighteen inches that might as well have been eighteen miles….
“I’m sorry that I’m such a disappointment,” Greta’s voice trailed off; almost in anticipation for a hoped for consolation that would never come. The wind seemed to have grown colder, but the temperature hadn’t changed. She turned to see Deke looking away.
“I don’t know what else to say….” She gasped. He turned to her and glared.
“It’s not like …. Nothing you can say will change anything….” He spat. The words stung. Greta’s eyes pled even as he started to turn away once again.
“Believe me, Deke…. If I thought it would have…. You can’t …. I don’t know how to say it other than what I’ve told you. If I stayed the same I would have died. This is who I am….this is all of me.”
“Not from where I sit. Do you know how much this hurts?” He sighed. Her eyes widened a bit in confusion and anger. How much it hurt him?
“Well I’m sorry I didn’t consult you,” she shook her head in frustration.
“You didn’t even tell me….How could you do that?” It was his turn to plead. It had to be hard to know something you believed…..someone whom you believed in….would withhold so much of himself? Deke waved his hand at her in confused dismissal.
“Would it have made any difference?” She looked down at herself as if his words had laid her bare. The shame of merely wanting what everyone else in this lifetime wants.
“I thought…. This is disgusting!” Deke continued to glare at her. His eyes flashed an anger that she thankfully never saw since her face was downcast. But the word destroyed what little love she had for herself as it was slammed hard against what had now become hatred from her best friend.
“I’m sorry to disappoint you,” she repeated; this time softly as she began to cry. The words had lost their bite as the sarcasm gave way to complete despair. He thought only of himself; not too hard to imagine since we almost always see things first from our own perspective. Greta could only hope with time that he would see things enough through her eyes to not hate her.
“Goodbye, Greg….” His words were tinged slightly with a regret that was engulfed in his own selfish pain. He stood up and walked away without another word.
“G…oodbye,” she said weakly. Life was just as it always had been. But no matter how much pain the moment just past had brought, she would live her life. Even still, she sighed before lowering her head to weep for the loss that even the best life would not heal…..
“I…I love you….”
Words and music by
Amy Lee, Ben Moody,
and David Hodges
As performed by
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