Lady in Waiting Part 3

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Lady in Waiting Part 3

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By Christina H

This is a story set in the 1800’s about a family that has lost every family member except the youngest son and his twin sister. Then his sister dies of smallpox and he manages to persuade his mother to let him become his deceased sister.

I really thank you for your very kind comments the really do help me a lot and make sure that I am on the right track with the story. Should I continue with the historical notes? I feel that the explain essence of life at this time.

Next day I dressed again in a black lawn dress slightly more fitted so my corset was needed this infernal contraption as well as forcing my body into curves it didn’t really have the stiffness also made me walk and sit very erect.

Now also began my lessons in looking after and taking care of my complexion.
As Miss M told me, “Young ladies should take care of themselves. —Young ladies are delicate plants. They should take care of their health and their complexion.”
To this end I was shown how to make cold cream and also a wash for the face both of which I should use daily: It really came to me that there was so very much for me to learn and this was so very different to my previous life.

Today was also to be my first day of learning the piano; after a morning of embroidery and deportment that involved learning to stand, sit and walk as a lady should.

There followed lessons on household management and painting with watercolour paint more embroidery and etiquette – learning how a lady must act and behave.
My piano lesson consisted of getting used to the piano and starting to learn the scales, which I was expected to know in time for the next lesson.
I realised that I had so much to learn that my days would be full and as mama told me the mourning period was in a way beneficial as at the end I would be a confident young lady.

Saturday came and the funeral of my sibling today I was dressed in a floor length crape satin dress my undergarments were all of the softest silk. I was corseted as the dress was nipped at the waist and had a soft crinoline under to give it shape.
I dressed in my underclothes then my whalebone corset fitted now it was the time for the crinoline that was fastened around my waist. My dress was then lowered over my head and over the crinoline as Miss Martha fastened the hooks at the back my servant fitted my black silk shoes to me tying the satin ribbon around my ankles.
The hem of my dress was scalloped with black bows for a mourning dress it was quite pretty.
My hair was in ringlets with a bob at the back the ringlet’s framing my face. Then came the bonnet it was a stiff black satin bonnet with a wide brim that curved around my face the satin was frilled around this brim and tied under my chin with a broad black ribbon.
Finally black lace gloves and a black lace shawl fringed with tassels and I was pronounced ready to join mama.

Walking in the floor length dress was strange but I soon got used to it coupled to this the wide brim of my bonnet restricted my vision to the side it was most strange but once again I slowly got used to this.
I met mama and my aunt’s and uncle’s cousins and family friends in the hall.
I was afraid that someone would see through me and realise that I was not as I appeared – but no everyone saw what the expected to see Charlotte grieving for her twin brother.

Outside the carriages awaited the teams of horses were adorned with black plumes and black ribbons woven into their manes and tails.
There were six coaches all adorned with black plumes each drawn by a team of four horses and able to hold 6 people each.
At the head of the procession was the coach bearing my sisters body. The coffin was carried in a special Landau, which opened at the rear and had glass panels all around it too was drawn by a team of four resplendent black horses.

I was handed into the carriage after mama and two off my uncles accompanied mama and I.
Arranging the voluminous skirts was difficult but I followed mama’s lead and managed to tame them. The funeral procession set off and I was quietly weeping into my kerchief.
I found it a great release to be able to show my feeling because as a boy it simply was not the done thing to cry or show emotion that was the lot of girls and women. I could cry openly at the loss of my bright and beautiful twin.

It was a strange feeling attending what was my own funeral as I stood by the coffin and touched it saying my final good byes to my sister I fervently prayed that she would understand and forgive me.
At the very moment I offered my prayer a Chiffchaff that had somehow got into the small church warbled its simple song.
To my ears it sounded like “yes, yes,” repeated over and over when I removed my hand from the coffin the bird song ceased. To my tormented mind this was a sign from Charlotte that she did understand.

When at the graveside the coffin was lowered into the cold damp earth I fell apart my weeping was continuous. Mama took my hand in hers and whispered, “Strength child, strength” while giving my hand a gentle squeeze.
It was when I had to throw a handful of soil down onto the coffin that I really did realise that this was my life from now on – Charles George Arthur Grenford was gone and in his place stood Charlotte Alethea Grenford.

We returned to the hall and Miss Martha took me upstairs and got me ready for bed, as I was very overwrought.
As I was tucked up in my satin sheets tearfully I pledged, “Martha I promise that I will be diligent and learn my new life as fast and as perfectly as I can.” I was still weeping she gently stroked my brow telling me, “I know you will child but you have so much to learn and so much catching up to do – now sleep for tomorrow you start again on your journey!”

I had a fretful night sleep where Charlotte came to me and told me she really understood.
In my dreams I told her that I felt a coward by not doing my duty to my country.
She calmed me telling me that the path I had freely chosen would be a hard one as being a woman would not be easy but mama needed me I was all she had left.
The dream ended with Charlotte hugging me to her telling me to be strong and to look after our mother and she would watch over me from heaven.

The next morning I awoke refreshed and with a new will to be the best I could. Before Miss Martha arrived I already had washed and donned clean underclothes I had a simple dress laid out, it was made from muslin and of course was black it was cut in the Empire style with a broad satin bow fastening at the back.
I had already removed the rags from my hair and had styled it in a clumsy bun with my ringlets framing my face.
My main problem was that I simply couldn’t fasten the dress as it laced at the back I was about to call a servant when Miss Martha arrived.
She looked at me with a look of pleasure and pride saying, “Well Charlotte you have done exceedingly well the dress you have chosen is perfect for the day.”

At breakfast I recounted my dream and earnestly pledged again that I would be diligent in my new life. This seemed to please mama and Miss Martha.
And so my day started, after breakfast we attended church the same one where yesterday we had laid my dear brother too rest.
Now I had to refer to her, as my brother to imprint in my mind that I was now a girl – everything I would say and do would reinforce this.
Then it was back to embroidery, deportment, etiquette, piano practice and learning how to successfully complete my toilette; learning how to put my hair into different styles.

Monday and all the ingredients had arrived for Mother Boville to show us how to make the potion.
All the ingredients were dried and the apothecary now had a regular order for some of these while mama had arranged for others to be grown in the herb garden to give us a regular supply of ingredients.
A gig was sent to bring Mother Boville to the hall. When she arrived I was amazed at the reverence and circumspection that was shown to her as she had a powerful reputation as a medicine woman, a healer.
We went into a small scullery where there was a fire with a small range we were shown how to prepare the ingredients with me grinding them in the mortar and pestle then everything was simmered for an hour then bottled – this would last a week so I had to prepare this potion weekly.
I took my first drink of it once it had cooled – the taste was strange but not unpleasant – I had to take this morning and evening for the foreseeable future.

As Mother Boville left mama had the groom put a hamper of food on the gig and she told the old woman, “Soon we will be going to London I have left instructions that the housekeeper is to ensure that you are warm and comfortable.”
Mother Boville looked at mama saying, “You always were a kind maid even when young I thank you m’lady may god look after you and the young maid.” She nodded at me as she said that.

Then she took my hands into hers and I felt an amazing warmth emanating through her thin hands.
She was silent for a while then she looked at me saying, “You have chosen a hard path being a maid t’aint easy but you’ll succeed. You’ll marry and serve at the highest table in’t land.”
My mother gasped saying, “Surely you are wrong - she can never marry!” Mama was fixed with a steely gaze like a hawk locking onto its prey.
“M’lady this is what I see for the future of the maid - it is written.” Mother Boville rasped. I have never seen my mama look like she did when fixed by the stare of this old woman.

With that Mother Boville was helped into the gig by the groom and after thanking mama she left leaving a small but very confused party on the steps of the hall.
We went inside and a clearly shaken mother stammered to Miss Martha, “Surely the old woman must be wrong – Charlotte can never marry!”
Even my governess looked discomforted as she replied, “Ma’am have you ever known Mother Boville be wrong with her predictions?”
Mama shook her head in disbelief saying, “No -------- But.”
Miss Martha quietly said, “M’lady let us not concern ourselves over this just yet – let us see what life brings for Charlotte.”
I noticed that even after a week I was used to being referred to, as Charlotte and mama and Miss Martha were comfortable using my new name.

Mama then said that I would need my own ladies maid but I would have to be very careful not to let her see my male thing but that was for later after my visit to the castrati surgeon.

My days now were getting dressed with the help of Miss Martha until we could find a way to disguise my male bits. I was now quite good at doing my own hair putting it in damp rags nightly then styling the ringlets.

My lessons were continuing and I was applying myself as I promised. My embroidery was getting a lot better and many an evening I would sit quietly with mama chatting and doing our embroidery.
Also my skill at the piano was progressing apace it would seem that I had a natural talent for playing this instrument.
My singing was also quite good my voice was a soprano and crystal clear and as mama told me once I had my operation it would remain so.

And all the time we were preparing for the move to London, packing clothes and other essentials. Even though we were in mourning I had at least a dozen dresses the same number of skirts and blouse combinations two trunks of underclothes and accessories and mama informed me we would be buying more once we were settled at out house in the centre of London.

Finally the time came for us to take our landau for the 6 day journey to London. It had been arranged that we would be sleeping at friends houses on the way so for the first time I would be exposed to the scrutiny of people outside the family to all the world I was a 10 year old girl with auburn ringlets and stylish mourning garb.

The first house we stayed at had two sons of 11 and 12 it was here that I noticed the total difference in my life as they vied to impress me, tried to dance with me and quietly tried to touch my hand.
At first I was afraid that my secret would be discovered but no everyone saw me as who I was very quickly becoming namely Charlotte.

We arrived in London and moved into our town house. The very next day I dressed myself in a black crape empire style dress material had contrasting vertical bands of matt black crape and shiny black crepe and ended in a frill at my hemline my frilled drawers peeped out from under my skirt my shoes were soft leather with a small 1” heel.
I donned my cap and shawl as we were going to see the surgeon and mama and I left the house taking one of the new style chaise carriages.

We arrived at the surgeons and ushered into his presence. Mama explained what she wanted.
I was examined by the surgeon who was a very slender very old Italian his manner was friendly and professional.
Mama asked about my male appendage and she was assured that once the operation was carried out it would remain the size it was.
He suggested that instead of the open drawers I currently used which had an open crotch I now should use drawers that were closed so my secret would be safe.

Mama then told him that she didn’t want me to suffer too much pain so to that effect it was arranged that I would be given Laudanum to drink, which would numb the pain.
So tomorrow the surgeon would come to our house and perform the operation there and from tomorrow there would definitely be no going back – not that I wanted to I was quite happy with my new female life even after such a short while.

Historical Note: - Anaesthetics and pain control were in its infancy in the 1800’s. Often operations were carried out with the patient fully awake with a strip of leather tied into his mouth the stop the screams. It is said that surgeons of the day often stuffed their ears with cloth to help reduce the noise from the patient during the operation the unfortunate patient was held onto the table by the surgeon’s burly assistants.
Thomas Beddoes and James Watt carried out research into the use of Nitrous Oxide gas in the 1780’s by 1799 it was in use but this was still very new and infrequently used. Laudanum, which was a mixture of Opium and alcohol, was the commonest means of crude anaesthesia in the early 1800’s
Castration before puberty (or in its early stages) prevents a boy's larynx from being transformed by the effects of puberty. As a result, the vocal range of prepubescence (shared by both sexes) is largely retained, and the voice develops into adulthood in a unique way. Prepubescent castration for this purpose diminished greatly in the late 18th century and was made illegal in Italy in 1870.

Here are some Regency home made cosmetics – try them at your peril!
Cold Cream.
—Take 2 ozs. of oil of almonds, one half oz. of spermaceti, 2 ozs of white wax and one half pint of water; melt them in a new pipkin (small pot), and when all is melted, whip it till cold; then let it lay in a little rose water till you put it in pots.
Pommade de Seville a face wash.
[This simple application is much in request with the Spanish Ladies, for taking off the effects of the sun and to render the complexion brilliant.]
Take equal parts of lemon juice and white of eggs. Beat the whole together in a varnished earthen pipkin, and set on a slow fire. Stir the fluid with a wooden spoon till it has acquired the consistence of soft pomatum. Perfume it with some sweet essence, and, before you apply it, carefully wash the face with rice water.
Red Lip Gloss
“Into a clean copper pan put half a pound of fresh, unsalted butter, and two ounces of beeswax, let it melt over mild heat, add some ounces of rinsed, dried and squashed raisins, and one to three loth alkanna root, and let everything simmer gently for 10 minutes. Then pour it on a mounted piece of dense linen and let the liquid run off, and when it begins to cool, add a spoon of strong bitter orange flower water. Stir until it has completely cooled and keep it in a well-covered pot.”

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Comments

How do I find part 1?

The story looks interesting, but I missed part 1 and can't find it How do I view it?

Suzij

I would be of the belief that

I would be of the belief that as the two were fraternal twins, that they looked very much alike at the age of 9-10, so becoming his sister would not be so noticeable to others. Their features would not be that far off to warrant someone taking a closer look to see if she was a girl or a boy. Generally, it is not until puberty that things really start to change children, for the good or the bad. Personally to me at least, being a boy would be bad enough, becoming a man would just make it doubly worse.
Interesting homemade cosmetics regarding the facials and lip gloss. Quality control back in those days must have really been a bitch to ensure.

So it has come to this

Going for castration mean the worst because the penis will be remove together with the testicles.
Am I right? Well I hope it will be a unique method of surgery so at least she look and feel close to a natural born female. Really sceptical of the doctor's method but perhaps that's is the best available during that time.

Castratii

Christina H's picture

In previous centuries women were forbidden to perform on the stage so the castrati came into being in Italy around the 15 century as the male voice naturally broke they found out that if they castrated a boy of about nine the voice stayed in the female range also the looks remains feminine BUT in some cases as there was no hormone regulator they could grow very tall and some were barrel chested but the voice remained pure.
This practice was outlawed in the 1870's and I believe the last castrati dies in the 1930's. It is strange that far from leading a life of celibacy the castrati were in great demand as lovers by the ladies???
By the 1800 the special surgeons were the best available and the success rate was way above conventional medicine for further reading follow the link. Castrati

The doctor were not trained medical people some were barbers (hence the red and white striped pole) while the castrati surgeons were usually butchers (literally)

The infusion Charlotte was taking was a recipe that was high in female hormones hence she developed different to the regular castrati

Christina