Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 2802

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The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike, est. 2007)
Part 2802
by Angharad

Copyright© 2015 Angharad

  
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This is a work of fiction any mention of real people, places or institutions is purely coincidental and does not imply that they are as suggested in the story.
*****

I drew up a rudimentary contract and Amanda signed it and pointed out it was a temporary thing until I got a proper one drafted. I also told her that I would have to notify HM Revenue & Customs that I was employing her and also she would need to enrol in some sort of pension fund. It seemed that no one had done this for her before. I also explained she would need to pay income tax and National Insurance on any earnings. To sort all this out I’d speak to my accountant, who would do a monthly payslip and organise the rest of the official deductions.

She left after seeing the cottage which David delighted in showing her, and my giving her twenty pounds for her two hours ironing. She seemed nice enough and I hoped was going to be an asset rather than a liability. She was going to start on Monday and work from eight thirty in the morning to four thirty in the afternoon. That would cover Lizzie from the time I left with the girls for school until I got home. Lizzie seemed to be quite happy with her and she with Lizzie.

David would be around some of the time most days and as he knew his way around the house, would advise her on anything she needed to know most of the time. They could also text me at work and I’d try and deal with their query as soon as I could.

Maureen called in later as she came back with bits of wood to fix the shed. “What did I think of Amanda?” I explained that first impressions were favourable and that my mountain of ironing was now just a hillock. “That’s a word you don’t ’ear much of these days, ma’am.”

“What is?”

“’illock.”

“Probably not.”

“I love to listen to you talk,” she said making me blush.

“Why?” I asked as red as a Welsh rugby jersey.

“You sound educated but not too posh, like Lady Stella does on occasion.”

David was giggling in the background as he listened to our conversation. “You mean as opposed to our peasant catering staff?”

David nearly fell on the floor he was laughing so much and Maureen chuckled too. “I’ll bet Amanda thought you were really funny,” she said upon recovering and David lost it completely. He sat on the floor weeping helplessly. “What did I say, ma’am?”

“I think my cook just collapsed with an overdose of hysterics and understatement exposure.” Maureen sat there looking completely perplexed while David convulsed with laughter had to bang his hands on the floor.

We left him alone for a few minutes and he recovered slowly. I knew any mention of any of it would set him off again. Thankfully, none of the girls walked in while he was incommoded.

“Is he all right, ma’am?” Mauren seemed quite concerned, he’s not havin’ an epileptic is he?”

“No, Maureen, it’s just a fit of hysterics having seen oblique references to a sort of double entendre.”

“I see,” said Maureen but her expression tended to indicate she hadn’t. When we returned to the kitchen David was sorting the dinner and the place was full of the aroma of fresh baked bread. I made us all a cuppa and then Maureen went off to patch up the shed. I noticed she now drove one of those huge four by fours with the extra pick up boot stuck on the back of it. At least she used it for work, whereas most of the drivers I’d seen with them looked as if they were just symbols of machismo.

The vehicle looked quite new so Maureen must be doing rather better for herself than when I first met her. I felt really pleased for her. She’d come on a very long way in that time. That sounds patronising but it isn’t meant in that way but as a celebration of her achievements and that in making them she’d helped others as well not all of them transgendered or other minority but simply having difficulty finding work. The bank had continued to give her regular contracts for repairs especially in Hampshire, Sussex and Dorset and in doing so enabled her to have a regular income she could use to employ people. The bank had also loaned her a lump sum of money at very favourable rates when they discovered what she was doing in employing the unemployable.

I think I mentioned years ago her sending someone to erect a basketball ring and the person who arrived wearing a skirt looked anything but female, with the then two boys I had, making the comment that she hadn’t had surgery when she went up a ladder.

We’ve had disabled and ethnic minority people who all did good work and who were effusive in their praise for Maureen because until then, they’d been unemployed. It made me smile that she described me as an angel when she did far more good works on an everyday basis than I ever did yet remained as modest as a maiden aunt.

Simon returned in a taxi singing Scotland the Brave after the Murray brothers won the doubles. I tried to point out they were playing for Great Britain not Scotland and he mumbled something about them being the same. I suspect our namesake in number ten and Nicola Sturgeon might disagree with him.

I got Tom to run me down to the rugby club and drove the F-type home. I half expected him to ask how he’d driven it home yesterday because he couldn’t remember doing so. I’d tell him I got Stella to bring it back as I had to watch the kids. He’ll go crazy. I suspect he’d prefer that I got Trish to drive it home.

Fortunately, Stella didn’t materialise until after we got back and she and the girls dashed up to their rooms giggling. I began to wonder if there was something in the air that day.

She came back down with an air of mystery about her and refused to answer any of my probing questions. I suspected she’d been Christmas shopping; a subject I’d have to give some serious thought to in the next few days as December approached. I really had no idea what to buy anyone. In the early days, when the children had little or nothing, they were so grateful for anything they got. I still remember Trish’s face when we got her the doll and the pram as a belated Christmas present she nearly died with happiness, not only had we recognised and accepted her choice of gender role but we’d validated it by her presents.

I also remembered her when she got to choose some new clothes, all rather girly, which was the first time that had been allowed to happen, previously the home had acceded to her demand to wear girl’s clothing but had chosen them for her. I suspect she’ll have forgotten that now because it’s a freedom she’s had for five or more years, except school uniforms. None of them like those too much though they all wear them without protest because they have to, even Danielle.

Looking back they’ve all come on so well in the past five years or so despite all sorts of problems and attempts on theirs or my life. They’ve all gelled so well as a family despite the difference in age and background and except the very small ones, they all know they’re adopted and so far it hasn’t affected them, perhaps because it applies to all of them. There’s still time for it to crop up but I hope it won’t, several of them have enough issues to deal with as things stand without that sort of trauma occurring.

The Murray’s number one fan was still snoring on the sofa in the dining room as I went past to see what David had made us for dinner.

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Comments

Reminds Me of Bower Birds

littlerocksilver's picture

Trucks jacked up with lift kits and oversized tires are just an evolutionary dead end. They say little about the real genetic worth of the creature driving them.

Portia

I think

Maddy Bell's picture

The words in your last sentence are a bit muddled up.
Surely it's the little genetic worth of the real animal driving?

Lol


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Madeline Anafrid Bell

Hey I take slight offence to that.

Being a Redneck from Middle GA I've seen plenty of jacked up trucks sporting liftkits. Depending on how high ya get the kit depends on the height. Personally if I had the money and my truck was 4x4 instead of 2wheel drive I'd slap a small lift kit on mine. Mosat of us have them as it give's us higher ground clearence which is helpful when driving through mud or really rocky area's. Now what is stupid is the morons that put liftkits on cars and put them big ole fancy rapper rims on them with what looks like 2in's of trie rubber.

Hey I take slight offence to that.

What most don't seem to realize is that while the bottom maybe jacked up 3 ft, if the radius of the tire is only a couple of inches more, then that's all that the axials will be lifted, so that's all the clearance that will be gained. Lift the bottom 3 ft only to gain a couple of inches in actual.clearance. LOL

Having had my share of time driving a Humvee.....

D. Eden's picture

I feel absolutely zero need to drive a jacked up 4x4, although both of my cars are in fact all-wheel drive.

One is a Cadillac CTS where the all-wheel drive serves two purposes - enhancing the performance and cornering, and providing additional traction in bad weather conditions. The second is an SUV - a GMC Acadia Denali - which I purchased for the additional backseat space and cargo capacity. When hauling four adults and their luggage around it comes in very handy. It too is all-wheel drive, mostly for the additional traction in bad weather. As I live in the northeast United States, in an area that routinely sees in excess of 100" of snow annually, and as not driving is not an option for me, the all-wheel drive is a necessity.

However, my SUV will never go any further off road than a grass parking area. It was not designed for that, and was not purchased with that intent.

I do find it hilarious when I see the local Yuppies driving their Range Rovers, equipped with brush bars and in several instances even a snorkel for fording streams. Like those vehicles being driven by some soccer mom will ever see anything but pavement! I wonder how many of them even know the actual use of the options they purchased on their over-priced station wagons?

D. Eden

Dum Vivimus, Vivamus

if only

Maddy Bell's picture

These chapters were longer......sigh! but hopefully there'll be more tomorrow. YAY!


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Madeline Anafrid Bell

This one

Angharad's picture

is only about 150 words shorter than the last Gabysode I proofed.

Angharad

Domestic bliss

Rhona McCloud's picture

With Christmas in the air it's apt for Cathy to take stock for a moment and appreciate how far they've all come. The mention of possibly lethal understatement reminds me of a late friend who in appreciation of a solution of sheer genius used words I will repeat here to describe Bike: "Not entirely without merit."
Thank you Angharad

Rhona McCloud

In the old life ...

In the very early 70's, I went out with the group from the office and don't remember getting home that night. The next morning, "The Thunder Rolled". It seems I had parked the car on the front grass. I still don't remember how it got there; must have been the Elves. What a ruction that was, and there was never a repeat. :)

Gwen

Functional families are all look alike,

as they are all happy. Dysfunctional families are each different in its own way. I stole that quote somewhere.

Cathy has a way of making the kids feel special and loved. She is undervaluing her contribution as usual.

At least Maureen is actually

At least Maureen is actually using her SUV for work purposes, which they were originally designed to be.
I am hoping that Amanda will be a valuable asset to the family, and especially for Cathy.

There is little doubt

that Trish whilst she is clearly a happy girl still has her memories of life pre Cathy firmly imprinted on her brain , It must have been very traumatic for her never being able to be her true self without risking ridicule from both adults and children alike , So the freedom to buy clothes that were for the real Trish must have been very sweet for her to savour , Five years may have gone by i doubt her memories will ever go though....

Kirri