Alexa Chapter 1: The Great Experiment
I couldn’t wait to be done with classes. Even though it was only Thursday, I was done for the week. I had set my schedule up so I had no classes on Fridays, which I had hoped would set me up for some great long weekends of partying. I was wrong. My two closest friends and roommates had dropped out of school during the summer semester, one because of money, the other because of grades leaving me all alone in this three-bedroom apartment. I was still trying to find someone to move in but I hadn’t been able to find anyone I could put up with yet or get anyone who wanted to commit to the yearlong lease I had signed. Life had become pretty boring.
I had just turned on my PlayStation and was getting ready to do a little combat when there was a knock on the door. I went to answer it and it was Katie and Jenny from across the hall.
“How is it going today Alex, ready for the weekend?”, Katie asked.
“Oh yeah, another weekend of battling terrorists” I answered as I invited them in. I could tell from the expression on Jenny’s face that she’s was thinking about something but Katie was her usual bubbly self. Katie and I had been close friends since middle school. In fact, she was the one who had told me and my friends about this great apartment. We had been through a lot together over the years and I considered her my “sister”. I would do anything for her. And now that my living situation had changed, I relied on that friendship even more.
Her roommate Jenny was a completely different story. Where Katie was your typical Irish looking girl, dark hair and freckles kind of on the short and chubby side. Jenny was a tall, beautiful Blonde. As I have gotten to know her over the last few years I had fallen madly in love with her. However, she was way out of my league.
Katie plopped down on the couch next to me as Jenny continued to stand and look very nervous. Constantly looking around my apartment but never directly at me as she seemed to be chewing on her fingernails I started wondering if I had done something wrong. I tried to push the thought out of my mind but continued to look at Jenny,
“So,” Katie started in, “do you have any plans for this weekend?
“Not really. Little homework. Maybe going to the game Saturday. Why what's up?” I ask.
I see Katie look over at Jenny. My eyes follow Katie’s over to Jenny. I watch as the tall blond takes a deep breath and sits down in the chair next me. Jen finally looks at me after she has settled herself. We stare at each other for several seconds before she stands up abruptly saying “I can't do it.”
“Jen, what is it. What do you need?” I say.
Katie chirps in with “Jen just ask. I wouldn't have brought his name up if I didn't think he was willing to help. Just ask!”
“Alex, I need to dress you up as a girl for my Behavioral Psychology class.”
Time freezes for me. I am sure I have a combination of a stunned and embarrassed look on my face. My mind starts whirling. After several seconds of staring at Jenny I can only mutter “What?”
Before I go on with this I should explain a little bit about myself. My name is Alex Quinn. I am a 21-year-old student at the University of Minnesota, I am the youngest of three boys, born to a Contractor father and schoolteacher mother in a small city about an hour from Minneapolis. I am definitely the runt of the litter. My two older brothers Adam and Danny both took after my father. Over 6 feet tall and broad shouldered. I on the other hand take after my mother and am lucky if I can hit 5 foot 6 in cowboy boots. Where both my brothers tip the scales at over two hundred pounds, the most I have ever weighed is 140 pounds. I never felt that I was good enough for my brothers. A fact that seemed to be driven home quite regularly by father.
The part where Katie volunteered my name to Jenny is one of several secrets that I and Miss Fahey share. Since we met in the 6th grade, we have been as close as a guy and girl can be without being in love. We were there for each other the first time we had our hearts broken. We were there for each other the first time we got drunk (but not the week following since we were both grounded). We celebrated the highs and comforted each other in our lows. We even went to prom together our Senior year as we were both single at the time. And we shared a secret that no one else knew when it came to me.
During our Junior year in high school, Katie came into my house as she normally did and caught me wearing a pair of my mother's panties and one of her bras. I was actually shaking when I looked up and saw her standing there just staring open mouthed at me. After what seemed like an eternity she smiled and said, “Alex do you wear girls’ clothes often?”
I think I was still in shock. I didn’t know how to answer. My mind started racing looking for an answer that wouldn’t ruin our friendship. I just sort of nodded my head at Katie. Just as I was finally going to open my mouth to answer we both heard a car pull up to the house. My mother was home! Before I could panic, Katie calmly told me to get my mother’s things off and that she would stall my mother. After coming down stairs I find Katie and my mother chatting in the kitchen. I join in on the conversation, making small talk before asking my mom if it was OK if I went over to Katie’s for a while and making a beeline for the door.
The incident was never spoken of again by either of us. However, I was never scared that Katie would saying anything to anyone. Our bond was that close
As I started to come out of my daze, I turned to Katie and asked her what she said to Jenny.
Before Katie could answer, Jenny sat down on the opposite side of me and wrapped both of her hands around mine. “Don’t be mad at her. I kind of pried it out of her.”
“WHAT?!” rage filling my voice as I broke free from Jenny and started pacing around the room.
“Alex, please sit down. Katie wanted to help me after I opened my big mouth to Dr. Burg.
I wanted to prove to him that by taking someone you would be able to teach them to adapt and actually thrive by simple conditioning.” Jen started explaining. “I wanted to show off to him and thereby acing the class. And I said I could do it with a person rather that a lab rat. I was stupid and had a big head about it. As soon as I left his office I knew I was in trouble. I had no one I could think of that I could work with as my test subject.”
“So that’s what I am, a ‘test subject’ for you? A LAB RAT!?” I say to Jen before turning to Kate and practically screaming, “And you volunteered ME!”
The bubbly Kate that had plopped down on my couch was now practically reduced to tears. She kept mumbling “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”
I should probably describe Ms. Jennifer Thompson a bit. The tall blonde is the only child of a wealthy suburban Minneapolis family. I don’t think the word “no” has ever been said to her by her parents. She got everything she wanted. When I first met her, I didn't like her. I thought she was a stuck up bitch. She had been assigned as Katie’s roommate in the dorms and seemed to have every gadget imaginable. As happy as she seems, I detected that she was not what she projected. There was a little sadness to her even though she acted like she had the world by the tail. Her and Katie hit it off right away and as freshman year went along, my views on Jenny’s personality slowly changed. But the sadness never left those beautiful blue eyes.
After freshman year, she and Katie had gotten an apartment in this building, while I thought it would be great to live with 5 other guys in a big old house on the edge of campus. It was crazy almost every night. The parties, the drinking and the lack of studying. After the first semester and grades were posted, my father went ballistic. He basically ordered me out the house. Saying he wasn't paying for me to be a drunk. As usual I cowered to his demands and started looking for a new place. I talked with Katie and she told me about this great apartment. I convinced two of my friends, Wyatt and Ryan to move in with me. This proved to be a mistake as Wyatt was constantly broke and could barely cover rent. After a couple of months, he moved home to Morehead and we rarely if ever saw him. Ryan was just stoned all the time and never went to class, when he got the letter saying he had been kicked out of school he just packed up and left. I have not talked to him in two months. So here I now sit in this great but empty 3-bedroom apartment with no roommates.
This change of status did allow me to spend more time with Katie and Jenny. We had always hung out together but now we were nearly inseparable. And as time went along, I realized just how sad Jenny was. I think even though she came off as supremely confident, she was really just a sad girl. She opened up to me more and more. As the last few months have passed I have grown closer to her and even started to fall in love with her. I was scared to act on it however. She was beautiful and rich and I was none of those things, Plus I didn't want to lose her as a friend.
But back to the situation at hand. On one side was my best friend practically in tears and on the other side was the girl I had secretly loved holding her heads in her hands. I was at loss.at what to do. I could either help my obviously distraught friend or I can try and maintain an outward display of masculinity and hurt one or maybe two of my few friends. After taking a second to try and calm myself, I let out a barely audible answer.
“What would I have to do?”
Jenny slowly looks up at me, her eyes open slowly. Looking directly into my eyes she says “Really?” As I nod yes, a smile slowly spreads across her face. The next thing I know I am being enveloped in the tightest hug I have ever felt and the two of us slowly fall onto the couch. I started hearing the words “You are the best” in stereo as Katie piles on to the two of us.
“Oh my god Alex. I knew you would do it. See Jen I told you he is the BEST friend anyone could ever have.” Katie says practically bursting with excitement. Soon all three of us are giggling and trying to get a hold of ourselves but the group hug was not stopping. Without letting go of each other we slowly get our self into a sitting position. I look directly at Jenny and ask the question again, “What would I have to do?”
Jenny breaks free and states calmly, “We would have to dress you as a woman head to toe, inside and out. Then I would observe how you react with the clothes on. And then...”
I cut her off abruptly. I twinge of fear creeping into my voice I ask, “Then what?’
“We would take you out into public to see how others would react. It is pretty simple. We would observe other people's reaction to you as you did simple tasks like going to the store or a restaurant.” Jen continues.
“No. Not going to happen. No way in hell am I going in public.”
Katie stands up and asks Jenny if she and I could have a minute. Grabbing me by the hand she leads me back to my room. She moves me towards the bed and motions me to sit down and walks back and shuts the door. By this point I am practically shaking. I am about to be given a chance I have waited for since I was about 15 but there was no way I was going out dressed in PUBLIC!
Katie looks at me calmly and asks “What is the problem Alex? Are you scared that you will be found out? Are you afraid you would be laughed at? What exactly is the issue?”
“Yes, but there is one other thing that I am scared of.” I say sheepishly. “That I will like it.”
Katie sits beside me and puts an arm around me. Pulling me in as I try to bury my head deep into her chest. I don't think I have ever been both scared and embarrassed at the same time. I think Katie senses that and does not say anything as I try not to begin crying my eyes out. After a few seconds she finally says something about ‘the day we never speak of.’
“Do you remember back in Junior year in high school when I found you in your mother’s things” I nod my head as she continues on. “I never have said anything about that because if you wanted to discuss it I figured I would let you come to me. Do you know why?” I break away from her and stare into her eyes pleadingly,
“I care about you more than anyone else in the world. You are more than a friend or even family. You have always been there for me through all the crap I went through when my parents split up. When I was thoroughly devastated after Pete Simmons broke up because he was cheating on me and then finding out I was pregnant his child? You stood by me through all of that. You were there as my coach when I had that baby and you were there when I put it up for adoption. My mother wasn't even there for me most of the time. But you were. I felt I owed it to you to be quiet about that day until you were ready to talk about it.”
Now I am crying.
Katie continued on. “I still remember asking you on that day if you did this often. You never really answered me, so I would like to ask again. Do you dress up often?”
I try and gather myself and answer her as best as I can. I lay out how on that day I was scared out of my mind when she walked in on me. I thought that our friendship was over and how I had tried to stop that day, but soon found myself dressing in my mother's things again. I told Katie how at various times I had either stopped at a Target where no one would know me and bought bras and panties or how I would order something over the internet. I would revel in the chance to wear these things. How I felt like a completely different person when I was dressed in these simple things. How I felt alive! But then I would have tremendous feelings of guilt and shame and throw everything out. And then start the whole process over again a few months later when I couldn’t contain the urge to dress anymore.
Katie looked at me lovingly. Not like a lover but more like a sister. Someone who was there for anything I needed. She simply asked, “Is liking it the real reason you seem to be fighting this idea?”
I nod and begin explaining that not only is it that the fact that I would probably enjoy it, but I was scared that my family would find out especially my father Richard. Not only would he quit paying for school but would probably kill me. Katie understood these fears. She knew the relationship I had with my family. Adam was just an overgrown meathead and she knew the relationship my dad and I had. Or should I say lack of relationship. Basically I lived in fear of “King” Richard. He considered himself a “Man’s Man” and could never understand why I didn't like hunting and fishing like him. Why I would rather read a book or play a video game rather than watch Pro Wrestling. We did have some common interests, such as football and hockey, but it pretty much ended there. It always seemed no matter how hard I tried I can never get him to acknowledge me like he did my brothers.
Katie pulled me close again. She asked me “If there was no threat of Richard and Charlotte or your brothers ever finding out would you go out completely dressed?” I answer in the only way I knew.
“Hell yes!” More enthusiastically than even I suspected.
‘“Good. Then let’s get started.”
Those words came out of my best friends mouth and the combination of anxiety and excitement increased tenfold. I had just agreed to allow the two best friends I had in the world to dress me up as a woman and then let them take me out in public. Had I completely lost it? This was something I had always been too nervous to try on my own. The enormity of the agreement meant my world was about to change for ever. I might lose two people I care about immensely or I could be discovered by my family and lose everything. But I had agreed to do it so it was time to face the music. I looked at Katie and asked, “So what now?”
“I think the first thing we need to do is go out and see Jen and find out how she wants to do this. Hopefully she has a plan for all this,”
One question had been sitting in the back of my mind that I knew I needed the answer to. Though at this point it really didn’t matter, but I needed to know so I asked. “Katie before we go back out, I need to know what you told Jenny about my “secret”? I’m not going to get mad. We are beyond the point of me being embarrassed by what you said but I need to know.”
Katie takes another deep breath and looks down. “I told her a partial truth. I said I saw you one time in women’s underwear. I didn’t go any farther. When she came back from class on Monday she was a mess. I asked her what had happened and she told me what she had told her prof. She then stated she had no idea who she could get to do this. She thought about heading down to the LGBT society and look for a volunteer. I could see that it was driving her nuts. She knew she had messed up. I had to go to work shortly after she came home, but was feeling extremely bad about the condition she was in. I thought about mentioning you the whole time I was at work. Yours was the only name that came to mind. Finally, on Tuesday afternoon I asked her about using you. She asked if I knew something. I tried to side step it, saying you would do anything to help us, but she persisted. Finally, I told that I thought I caught you in panties once. But that was it. She didn’t say anything, she just got up and left the living room. I thought I had really screwed both your and my friendship with her.”
I just kept looking at Katie as she told her story. I could see that the whole situation had been draining on her even though she had been keeping a smile on her face. She continued on with her story.
“I didn’t see Jenny the rest of the night. I thought I had really fucked up. It wasn’t till lunch yesterday that I finally saw her again. She was picking at her salad, as usual but she also was quieter than usual. She finally looked up and asked if I thought you would do it? I convinced her that you would. I knew I wouldn't have to talk you into it. At least I thought you would be willing. I know how loyal you can be to your friends.”
After listening to all this I realized that I would have done it if I had been asked without Jenny knowing my past. In some ways her knowing my past made it harder. But I gathered my thoughts and stood up. I walked past Katie and out the bedroom door. There was a question I needed answered. It was time to “man up” so to speak. So I went right out to Jen and stood in front of her and asked the question that was burning in my mind. I looked at the beautiful blonde sitting on my couch and before she could say anything I asked he flat out: “Jen, do you think any less of me for what Katie told you?”
Jenny looked up at me with her beautiful blue eyes and shook her head ‘No”. Without even pressing further I asked one final question. The one that seemed to seal my fate.
“One more question. How do I become a lab rat?”
You would have thought I just told her she had won the lottery and was marrying Channing Tatum. Once again she practically tackled me with her hug. Knocking me backwards into the chair this time I couldn’t help but wonder if Jenny had ever played football. She sure like to tackle people! As she was hugging me she kissed me on the check and kept thanking me. I kind of felt like Fred Flintstone with Dino on top of him. We both regained our composure. Well I did. Jenny was babbling on. I couldn't understand any that she was saying other than a few “Thank You’s” and “You are the best” coming out of her mouth. Katie came out as Jenny was verbalizing out loud what needed to be done. Thank god she came out. I knew I could never get Jenny under control. Thankfully, Katie finally got her settled down.
Katie took control of the situation as she calmed Jenny down. “Okay what do we need to do?” Jenny grabbed my laptop and started discussing what was needed to be done. We had to get clothes. Both girls figured that they had something that would fit me, but they might get more. They decided that I would need my own lingerie and probably my own shoes. I could agree with that. Katie asked me if I had any lingerie. I shook my head no as I explained that I recently gone through one of my purge cycles. I froze. I just realized I had admitted out loud I was a crossdresser and no one blinked an eye. The girls just continued on like I said I was out of milk. This is nuts!
So as I sat there being amazed, the two girls decided that a shopping trip was needed to get the proper tools for the project. Jenny volunteered her parents credit card to finance this experiment. I tried to decline her offer but she insisted. A plan was made that Jenny would head out while Katie would take measurements and text them to Jenny to save time. We all got up and went to the girl's apartment. Jenny grabbed her purse and was out the door in a flash but not before I got another hug and a thank you.
As soon as Jenny was out the door, Katie once again took control. I was ordered to strip and Katie went to her room to look for a measuring tape. After a few minutes she came back as I sat uncomfortably in my boxers. I was ordered to stand up and put my arms out as Katie wrapped the cloth tape around my chest and waist as she took notes on her phone. Then she looked me in the eye and said “drop em” with a sly grin on her face.
Instantly, I place my hands on my hips and look at her. “Really.” I say. Not asking but declaring her thought as crazy. “Yes,” she replies with a giggle. “Nothing I haven't seen before.”
Ah yes. The memories come rushing into my mind. The one failed attempt of physical love that we thought would bring us closer together. This happened shortly after Katie “discovered” my secret. It wasn’t that we didn’t want it. I was as excited as ever and she seemed to be in the same boat. It was just there was no passion. It felt odd. It was an experience that ended much too quickly. I think we were just trying to get it over with. We both agreed that while we enjoyed it, there was something missing. While that act achieved what we were hoping it would, it did not have the outcome we expected. It didn’t bring us together as lovers. It was more like it bonded us together as family.
So I dropped my drawers, but tried to cover myself and maintain some modesty. Katie playfully slapped my hands away so she could measure my hips. When finished, she quickly completed her notes and sent them off to Jenny via text. She told me to stand there and ran back into her room and returned carrying a couple of pair of shoes and her big pink fluffy robe. Telling me to put this on rather than my boxers. She had me sit down so she could try a couple of pairs of shoes on me. I usually wore a men’s size eight. Like I said I am not real big. When the few pair of shoes Katie tried didn't fit, she ran off and grabbed a couple of pairs that I assumed were Jenny’s. They seemed to fit perfectly. She texted this revelation to Jenny.
So there I sat. A guy in his best friend's apartment naked except for HER robe. This might have been the most surreal thing that had ever happened to me. Yet. We looked at each other and started giggling. What could be said? A girl was about to transform her best guy friend into a girl. This was not an everyday event. Finally, she asked me how I was feeling about all this. I thought for a second and could only come up with a single word answer. “Anxious”
Before we could talk any further, Katie’s phoned beeped. It was a response from Jenny. As Katie read the message I heard her say good idea. She ran out of the apartment and returned a few seconds later holding my razor and a can of shaving cream. When I saw her I knew exactly what she was thinking, so I grabbed the shaving gear and headed for the girls’ bathroom. I shaved my face as close as possible. I could see out of the corner of my eye, Katie’s reflection in the mirror. When I was finished I turned and presented myself for inspection. Katie rubbed my face and nodded approvingly. But when that was done, I could tell by the look on her face there was something else on her mind, “Were not done”
It was a simple comment but I could not understand what she meant. I stood there for a second staring at her. She eyes trace down my body towards my feet and then back up to my eyes. As our eyes met a devilish grin developed on her face. Her comment hit me like a ton of bricks.
“No way. How would I explain it?” As I respond to her nonverbal command.
“It’s Fall. You aren’t wearing shorts any more. No one will notice that you don’t have hair on your legs.” Katie responds. “Besides it will feel so much better.”
I try my last defense even though I know Katie will shoot it down immediately. “What about King Dick.”
“He is 75 miles away and you won't see him for at least a month. Besides it’s only for a few days. Come on. You will love it.”
That was the problem in my head. I KNEW I would love it. I was scared that I would love it TOO much. So I acquiesced to Katie’s wishes and sat on the edge of the tub and allowed Katie to begin to shave my legs. Luckily I only had very light hair on my legs. She then moved up to my arms to shave them and then shave my armpits. She even shaved the few chest hairs I had finally developed. At this point though I realized that I was now as smooth as the day I was born except in one sport. I drew the line there when she playfully tried to start shaving in the “swimsuit area”.
“We’ll see.”, Katie retorted to my denial of her actions. “I’ll bet you $50 before we are done, I will be doing a little shaving down there.” Confident of my resolve I stuck my hand out and proclaimed “Deal”.
Once I wiped the remaining shave foam from my legs, Katie and I returned to the living room. Now we just needed Jenny to return from her shopping to trip and the great experiment could begin. Not that all activity had stopped, my nervousness started to build again. Could I go through with this? Was I really going to let two of my best, if not only, friends dress me as a woman? But more importantly, was I going to wish that it would never end.
Those hopes and fears were about to be answered as I heard the door begin to open.
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