Like a Human

Julie Banner’s feet were in pain so she left the nightclub early that night. With it being 1 A M her prospects of getting what she wanted were quickly diminishing. The lady who wanted action knew no one one new was going to show up. and none of the men at that meat market was worth her feet throbbing. Now if there was some grade A prime stud she could get then she would not even notice the pain those 6” fuck me heels gave her. she would be working her magic to get them in bed.

The lady who wanted a man’s touch did feel kind of shallow for not giving any of the men at the club a chance at enjoying her skills. It was not that she had anything against them, in fact she knew a couple of them were real keepers.If one of those keepers were her man she would not even notice how tight those heels which made her ass look great were.

Julie just wanted meaningless sex. She could not get revved up for a wild session of passon without being sexuallly aroused by her partner. These men at the club she would have to form an emotional connection with them to want them.

Having that momentary emotional connection was not good enough for her. It just reminded her that she felt a disconnect with being human. The lady who needed more than she wanted could not stand the thought that if she made another connection with someone it would just end.

As she was walking back to her hotel room, Julie knew she was going to have to settle down one day soon. Her body just could not take the wear and tear she put on it to go out. More and more of her sexy shoes hurt her feet if she was in them too long. Those late night at the made the party girl lose the day day to sleep. She felt like she had the corset on for days after. Lastly she was just so uncomfortable tucking in her manhood.

Another reason was the price, in money and time, to be out and about as Julie. With living in a small town she had to take the train to London, stay in a hotel, and then the price for a drink at a nightclub was outrageous compared to her local pub. It cost her well over 200£ and an entire weekend just for a couple of hours of social interaction as the fabulous Julie.

The main reason and the one she thought of the least, was she was getting older. That one was the cause of all the complaints she had about the other reasons it was not as fun to go out. Plus, she had different needs in her life now. It was not about late nights and being seen. The lady who was maturing found that life was about the little everyday events. It was about sharing your morning cup of coffee with that someone special. It was about feeling alive by just being alive.

Before turning the corner Julie stopped in the take away shop to grab some food. It was her usual order of three pieces of chicken with hot wings, fries, and one Pepsi. The worker made his regular comment of it was amazing how she kept a great figure while eating so much. Julie gave her regular comment of she was picking up an order for a special friend.

**********

It was a little after 1 A M and AJ was sitting under the overpath fighting off his body shutting down for the night . He was a tired and should have retreated back into the shadows of the world to go to sleep. The troubled man only truly found peace when in the land of Hypnos. He so wanted the sweet release of not being conscious. That was the only time he was not sentient of what his life has become.

Finding peace was not important to AJ’s troubled soul at that moment. It was a little after 1 A M and Julie should be turning the corner soon. He could put up with the uneasy feeling he had from the pressure of just being gave him, for she was special. She treated him like he was a human. It was the only true interaction he had with anyone and was becoming less frequent.

Even if he was the most social person in the world he would still want to talk with Julie tonight. For once he had something of importance to tell her. Even just knowing for once he had something of significance to share was making him feel human. It was worth fighting off the sweet embrace of evanescent nothingness to feel human.

AJ feeling human used to be weekly, then it went to a fortnight. Now, it was creeping up to only monthly. He knew it would not last forever, nothing did. It did sadden him that she would just never show up again in his life and there would be no proper goodbye. No closure on one of the few good things in his life. Then hopefully he would find something which would give him the grace to feel human again.

Thinking of that day the would find out Julie was no more part of his life also brought joy to him. If she moved on from going to the nightclub, that meant Julie found what she was looking for. The angel incarnate deserved true happiness, the kind which only came from within. The man with the wounded soul knew the good memories of a good soul giving the most important thing a person has, time, to him would carry him on in future hard times. She would keep on giving to him long after he faded from her memory.

Her stopping to speak with him on her journey back to her hotel gave him nourishment for both his body and soul. The man who roof was the sky could feel the endorphins lift his mood when she listen to him. It also provided wine for his body and soul, she would always stop at the corner shop after dropping off the food to get him whatever he wanted to drink.

The man who went by AJ knew it was a little after 1 AM and was waiting to see if he had a couple minutes of being human again. It might be the last time he got it personally from Julie.

**********

As soon as Julie started to walk under the overpass her feet were aching less, her corset felt a little looser, and her gaff was better fitting. It was from seeing her friend AJ. Julie gave a friendly stare to her friend as she waved to him.

Most people averted their gaze from him for what he was and how he looked. People looked past the homeless for they did not want to interact with them. They might be asked to give alms. People also did not want to look at AJ for he was faceless. His long beard, sunglass and mame of dreadlocks cover any distinguishing features which would show he was once an individual.

AJ always bite his tongue at this point as the waved. Even with knowing that his friend was going to stop to talk with him, he did not want to make any assumption. That simple assumption of interact would also be an expectation. If the expectation was not met, it would crush his fragile soul.

Julie smiled “Hey AJ, it is great to see you.”

AJ wanting his old friend to at lesst know his real name said “Julie, you know this is all my pleasure and please call me Austin tonight.”

Julie was a little tipsy and almost asked why Austin,then she figured out that was her friend’s name. It touched her that the faceless man with the unshared past opened up to her. “OK Austin, you hold on to the food and what do you want to drink?”

Julie asked the question fullwell already knowing the answer- A bottle of red wine, the cheapest one. Austin asked for the least did not want her to spend anymore money on him than she wanted to. “OJ. I want some Orange Juice.”

Julie thought that maybe the man with hurt in his soul, needed to go to stronger pain relief. “With vodak? “

“No, I am not drinking tonight. Can you please also get me a cake and chocolate milk. I just want something sweet. I can give you the extra money for the dessert.”

“Austin, the after dinner treat will be my treat. It is the least I can do for you with what you do for me.”

“Thank you. Hurry back I have to tell you something”

If those words came from anyone else, Austin would have taken them as pity. With Julie, he did not. He knew that she was missing something from her life and that void was forgotten when they talked. Austin did not know why just talking to him did so, but was grateful he added to their relationship.

Not wanting or expecting anything from Julie is what Austin added to the relationship. He was the only person she knew that was glad to just see her. She liked that she made him happy by just being herself. It made her feel good about being who she was than any worthless one night stand.

As Julie crossed the street Austin thought that was how he should picture her. The smile on her face as she was happy to give a little kindness to a lost soul was how he should remember her. He made the decision this was going to be the last time he saw her. That was still something important but not his original news.

“So what do you have to tell me, Austin.”

With a tear hidden by his sunglasses the man who was about to end who he was said “This is the last time you will see me.”

Julie felt bad for she knew her not coming up to go clubbing weaken their friendship. “Oh come on Austin, I will start coming back up here more often. I Just need to find my groove again.

Even if I don’t, why don’t you move down by me. Salisbury is a nice little town. There is a nice community there for you to join.”

How Julie called the homeless residents of her hometown a community made Austin feel good. She saw them as human also. Knowing that he was not special to her made him feel normal. Made him knew at that moment he was making the right choice.

“Julie, I do not want to join that community. I want to help them, not join them. I am done with living on the street. I am done with trying to live my life in a bottle. I am going to get help Then I will help others.

I wanted to tell you for you helped me come to this decision. You treating me like you treated anyone else made me want it more. I want to be human again.
I was going to wait until you disappeared from my life by not coming up here anymore. My news was about me just starting to turn around my life.

Now, I need to do right now. I need you to know you change someone’s life by just being you. I need you to see that the old me is not anymore”

That joyous news made Julie sad. She knew she was being selfish, but it was yet another connection in her life which ended. They might not be close friends, but Julie felt a close and deep connection to Austin. She cared for him for who he was and she knew he cared for her for who she was also. Not wanting to cry Julie cracked a joke. “Who will I share my after clubbing meals with now.”

“How about that Rob you talked about. You know the guy from Amesbury you chat with at the club.”

Julie laughed, she was not ready for Rob to be a bigger part of her life. Rob was one of those keepers she saw at the club tonight. She was not good enough in her mind to be the person Rob shared his life with. She needed to become a better person. “I am not ready for him. He deserves someone who can give him a good life. I can only give him a good time.”

“You can give him a good life. You help others, you made me see that I can help others just by being yourself. You made me a better person just by your presence, I will say you are able to give him a good life for you will be trying to.

Don’t worry, you will be fine without me. Also don’t worry about me, I am now part of your past.”

Those words and Austin decision to change made Julie see that she needed to change also. She needed to take the chance with Rob. She knew land him in bed, she was just scared that she could not keep him around outside of the bedroom.

“Fine, I will but here is the deal six months from tonight, We will meet right here. I want to see Austin after he changed his life.”

“I will be there also.”

Julie was hurt by the truth of Austin becoming just a memory. It was goodbye. The would not see each other ever again.Even with Austin saying he would be there, she did not believe him. It was not for he was dishonest. Most People do not keep those kinds of promises. They were a lie to mask the pain of two people going their separate ways for good.

*********
Six months has past and true to her word Julie planned to go under the overpass after a night out on the town with Rob. She took that chance and landed that keeper in and out of the bedroom. Even with not being at the club for three months, having a great time and enjoying seeing her old friends. She did not miss it at all. It was not for her anymore.

It was time to go for what she enjoyed so far from the night in London was emerging from The Underground at Tower Hill station. That site always made her stop in her tracks when she saw The Tower of London about 100 meters to her right. She found it striking to come out of a modern day marvel of technologically to see a complex which was over 800 years old which was a marvel of technologically when it was built.

It was a little past 1 AM and the couple left the club. Their friends begged them to stay, they knew it was the last time they would see those two. Julie knew she could stay there to the bouncers told everyone they had to leave. Her feet were not hurting from the 6” fuckme heels, and the corset and gaff were feeling comfortable. Julie knew she could not stay.Still it was time to go. The lady with a new life had a promise she wanted to keep.

Those two picked up food from the takeaway shop and then headed for under the overpass. They turned the corner and Julie’s heart dropped. No sign of Austin. She thought the worse, that Austin ended it all. It pained her and her grip on Rob’s hands got a little tighter and she turn to bury her face in his chest.

Austin was running late and turn into the other entrance of the overpass as Julie went into premature mourning for a friend. He saw her being held by a man and that put a smile on his face. He knew that man had to be Rob. The reborned man picked up the pace of his stride and said “Julie, sorry I am late.”

Hearing a stronger more confident version of Austin's voice changed those tears of sorrow to tears of joy. “Austin!!!”

Rob looked at the love of his life and was so happy her friend made it. He nodded to tell her it was all right to go met him.

“Oh my God! You clean up so good Austin.”

“You look so much better also Julie, that is the best smile I ever saw on your face.”

“While I can say the same, then again this is the first time I ever saw your face.You are a handsome man. You better never grow a beard again.”

“Before we join Rob. I know that is Rob for how happy you are. Answer this question for me? Why were you so kind to me and treated me like a human.”

“Austin for you were so kind to me. The first night I met you, you treated me like I was a human. You did not see me as a man in a dress. You did not see me as a person who could help you. You only saw me as a person.You were in pain and needed kindness so I gave it. I only treated you how you treated me.”



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