I jumped up and down and said . “I was right.” over and over. She grabbed me by the arm and demanded to know what I meant.
“I just knew in my heart that out of those baggy dreary clothes you were a Hottie. Tina you are beautiful no matter what you have on. You just need to show it.” I hugged her tight and kissed literally on the lips. She started to tear up and I pulled a tissue from my pocket and dabbed at her eyes. Do Not Cry! You will ruin your makeup and I haven't learned how to put it on yet.”
“Then we will work on it this afternoon before practice.” She said as she draped her arms around my neck and kissed me back.
“OK what's going on that I don't know about?” Albert asked with a slightly hurt look on his face.
We filled him on the day before and he laughed at the thought of Tina playing softball and doing well at it.
“And why pray tell? Do you not think I can play ball? Hmm?” She asked.
“I have never seen you with a ball and I have known you for six years. Much less with a dress on.” Albert said.
“There are a lot of things you don't know about me. So there.” She said and sashayed out in front of us. I must that the view took my breath away. She had some beautiful legs and her figure was gorgeous. I took off after her and Albert came running up after us. I put the tic-tac in my pocket and forgot about it.
At school both Tina and I were now a part of the softball girls. They had us stay with them all morning and at lunch we sat with them. While we at lunch. Three different boys came up to Tina and asked for her name and number. I nudged her and winked, that got me a poke in the ribs. I told her that all she had to do was say yes to one of them and I would be off the hook for Saturday, to which she let know that there was no way she was not going with me. Juliet asked what we were planning for Saturday night and I told her what was going on. The rest of the team told us they would go with us just to see me in a dress. I groaned but inwardly I was shouting Yes, Yes, Yes. I met Mom after lunch and she to take me to see Dr. Grace. Dr. Evelyn Grace, she was young and pretty with a fast growing family practice.
Mom took me and as we waited in the waiting room I noticed a tall girl sitting across the room from us. Her clothes didn't seen to fit right and she kept head down and didn't speak to anyone or a look anyone in the eye. Then it dawned on me. That was on of the guys that used to play on the baseball team I tried to get on. Mom was at the receptionist counter dealing with insurance paperwork so I walked over to her. I sat next to her. I honestly thought she was going to faint. “Hello do yu remember me? I'm Michelle I tried out for the baseball team.”
She looked at me as I put my hand out to shake hers. She took my hand and I put my other hand on hers. “I am going to do the same thing you are doing now.
Tears came to her eyes as she looked at me and said. “Make sure you have the support of your friends and family or it is going to be difficult at best. No body will talk to me. You are the first person from school that has reached out to me and I thank you for that. I just want yu to know that this isn't easy and you need to be careful.”
“What is your name?” I asked.
“Brittany Johnson, I am out of school now that I am sixteen and I work at the Burger Flop on fifth street, come to see me if you get the chance.” she said with a weak smile.
“OK I will.” I took a piece of paper and wrote my phone number on it. “Here if you need someone to talk to call me. By the way the Flop has the best burgers in town.” I said.
“Thanks I will tell them. Well the nurse is looking at me I have to go. It was nice meeting you.” Brittany said as she walked to the back.
Mom sat down next to me. “Who was that?”
“Brittany Johnson, I used to play ball with her. Now she is out on her own.” I said sadly
“Isn't she a little young to be out on her own?”
“Yes, I would think so. She is only a couple of years older than me. I don't think she and her family get along.”
“What a shame. She is cute.”
“Mom, what will Dad say when he finds out?”
“Honey don't worry he loves you. He will probably have some problems understanding, but it will work out.”
“Mom are you listening to yourself. We are talking about the man that started screaming at the TV when they showed a pride parade last month.”
“Michelle he was just under a lot of stress and took it out on the TV. He won't hurt you at least not while I am around.” She said , but I could tell she was worried. She wouldn't look me in the eye and her eyes were moist. Mom and Dad had been at odds for several years, we could hear them arguing often. I know they haven't been arguing over money since I heard them talk about how everything was paid for and they could go to France now, but Mom didn't seem excited about it and another argument ensued.
“When are you going to tell him?” I asked.
“When the time is right. First we need to see what is going on with you then we can make decision about that. Don't worry I will take care of it.”
The nurse stepped out and called Michelle Rogers and I just about jumped out of my skin. This wee has been eventful to say the least and is starting to take a toll on me. The Nurse came in after the usual “take off all your clothes and put this gown on and sit up here on the table,” speech. I took my top off and revealed my camisole and the Nurse openly stared at me but stopped when Mom cleared her throat. “Uh, sorry so why are you here today?”
“Because my son is developing into a girl.” Mom said dryly, obviously upset over the Nurses actions.
“How long has this been going on?” She asked.
“About a year.”
“Are you taking any medications not prescribed to you.”
Why did everyone think I was a drug abuser. This was getting on my last nerve. Where ever it was. “No!” I said emphatically.
She took my blood pressure, temperature and my pulse, wrote them down the chart. Had me to get off the table and step on the scales and measured my height. Pronounced me to weigh one hundred and four pounds and sixty four inches tall. Then she abruptly left. Mom was frowning the whole time. Then Dr. Grace came in and looked at the chart and her eyebrows shot up.
“Michelle I know you wouldn't take any drugs, but do you think you might be getting them without your knowledge?” She asked and took out a tape measure. She measured me like Mom and Suzette had done last night. She looked at Mom with a strange look and had me to take off my panties and lay down on the table so she could examine my boy parts or what was left of them. “Why do you have panties on?”
“Because they fit better and I like them. I really want to be a girl. I guess my prayers have been answered. Huh? Not being flippant I really believe it.”
“So do you think someone has been giving you a pill that you didn't know about?” Dr. Grace asked in her beautiful smooth silky voice.
“No mam the only thing close to a pill I get is the good luck tic-tac Albert gives me in the morning.”
“A tic-tac. What does it look like?” Dr. Grace asked seriously.
“I have one here let me show it to you.” and I got my pants and reached into the pocket, pulled out a single blue pill. “See, Albert says they are lucky since they are blue.”
Dr. Grace took it and pulled out this big thick book with Physicians Desk Reference on it. It had all the medications in it. She flipped through the book until she came to a page with pictures of pills on it. She matched the tic-tac to one on the page “Michelle your tic-tac is a five milligram progesterone tablet. I give as hormone replacement therapy for ladies who are going through menopause. This is a pretty high dose for you. I am going to have to draw some blood before we can move forward from here.”
“Are you saying his friend has been giving him estrogen pills for a year?” Mom asked.
“I to looks that way to me.” Dr. Grace answered.
“Michelle why would he do something like this.”
“I don't know Mom. He is my best friend. My only guy friend. We have never argued or anything like that.” I started crying at the realization that Albert had done this to me without my permission and had kept it up for a year. I just couldn't understand why. Mom hugged me and whispered that it would be All right. I just didn't see how though.
“What do we do now Doctor?” Mom asked.
“I need to see how much testosterone he is producing and how much estrogen is present in his body. If he isn't, which is a strong possibility. We may have to contemplate HRT only at a much lower dose as we know he wants to become a female. I am going to set up an appointment with a psychiatrist that specializes in gender issues. He will need to see them to have the surgery if it comes to that. He may already be a candidate for the Real life Test. Right now though I think we need to see what the blood work shows.”
The nurse came in and drew the blood leaving us so I could get dressed and we left after Mom confirmed that they had her number. We were both silent on the way home. I went straight to my room and laid down on my bed. I must have fell asleep because I was awakened by my father who was cursing and yelling at the top of his lungs. “What the hell do you mean he wants to be a girl? I am not going to have some sissy queer bitch in my house! Do you understand?”
“George, I will not have calling Michelle names like that!” Mom said with a growl.
“You... Don't tell me what to say or not say period.” Dad growled back. “Mich get in here now.” he yelled.
Mom suddenly stepped in front of Dad and said. “I will tell you what I will and will not have around here.” She said calmly.
“Mich get the hell in here now.” Dad yelled ignoring Mom.
I walked into the living room and Dad pointed to the floor in front of him and I complied. “Your Mother says you want to be a sissy bitch.”
“George you heard me.” Mom growled. I knew things ere about to get bad and Dad was scaring me more than I have ever been scared.
“Well answer me sissy!”
“Yes sir I do.”
“Well it ain't going to happen. Tomorrow you are going to get a hair cut and I am enrolling you in military school. You are going to grow up a man in this house. Period.”
“George you are not going to touch him.” Mom and pushed me back so I left for my room and Mom and Dad both really started screaming. I wen in and Suzette came in behind me. We sat on the bed hugging each other scared. Things quieted down and Mom came in locked the door behind her and sat on the bed with us. Now I was really scared.
“I am sorry you had to hear that. It looks like we are splitting up. Now before you even think that it is your fault I have to say it isn't. He has been doing some things lately and I have already had the papers drawn up for a divorce. I kept hoping that we could overcome some of our problems and stay together. I guess I will have them served tomorrow. Right now I want you to put some clothes in a bag both of you. I am taking you somewhere safe for the night.” Mom had no more said that when the door to my room came crashing down. Torn from the door frame in one violent motion.
Dad rushed in and grabbed me by the hair of my head. He had a pair of scissors in his other hand. “By God you are going to have that sissy shit cut off right now!” He yelled. Mom grabbed the hand with the scissors, but he threw her against the wall causing her to hit the head board with her head she slumped down and became still. Suzette jumped up and grabbed the hand holding my hair and tried to get him to let go. He just flipped her away like she was nothing. She lept up and grabbed his hand again. I took the opportunity with the distraction and kicked him in the balls. All it did was make him even madder and he punched me in the face in the right eye while still holding the scissors. I felt something warm and wet run down my face causing my right eye to burn. Suzette screamed and suddenly lept on his hand again and bit down on it. Dad yelled and I kicked him three times hard in the balls. He let go of me and I ran out the destroyed door and out side. He tried to catch with without success as I ran out and down an alley. I was headed to Tina's house without knowing it. When I saw her house I ran up to the door and frantically started ringing the door bell until it opened. Tina opened the door took one look at me and screamed.
“Mom, Dad come quick, Michelle is hurt.”
She pulled me inside and her Mom and dad who were both registered nurses came out and grabbed me. They took me into the kitchen where Mr. Rowland Tina's dad kept pressing on my eyebrow. Mrs. Rowland came in with some bandages and a large white cloth soaked in hydrogen peroxide and began cleaning my eyebrow with it. “What happened to you?” Tina asked.
“Dad found out and hit me Mom and Suzette. I think Mom is dead. She wasn't moving when I ran out with Dad chasing me.” Mr. Rowland called the police and gave them my address. Then he asked. “Did he hit you with his fist?”
“Yes sir and he had a pair of scissors in his hand. How bad is it?” I asked.
“You have a cut all the way to the bone. You will need stitches and X-Ray to make sure you don't have a fracture.”
A knock at the door took Mr. Rowland away. I heard him addressing someone as officer and then a tall muscular police officer came in and looked at my cut. “Who did this?” He demanded.
“I told him I wanted to be a girl.”
“Did he have a weapon?”
“He had a pair of Scissors in his hand. He was going to cut my hair. He hit Mom first and she wasn't moving, then he hit my sister when she bit his hand to make him let go of me.”
The officer went into the next room and called someone on his radio. Then he told Mr. Rowland to take me to the hospital.
Back at the house. ( I'll bet you thought I was going to say ”Back at the Ranch” Wrong.) My Dad was beating on the front door trying to get back in the house. Suzette had locked the door on him and had called 911. Mom had begun moving again although she was slightly confused. Then they heard a lot of bumping and banging on the front door and Dad cussing. Then Suzette heard the sound of a taser and Dad hitting the ground. She peeked out the window to see Dad being hand cuffed while laying on the ground. Mom opened the door and stumbled out on the porch and collapsed. The police called an ambulance to take her to the hospital. Fortunately it was the one she administered.
I was at the hospital when the ambulance brought her in with Suzette. She saw me and she grabbed me in a hug and started crying. “Are you OK?” Suzette sobbed.
“I'm fine thanks to Tina's mom and dad. How are you and Mom?”
“I'm fine. Mom seems to have a concussion according to the Fire Department paramedic. Oh, and he is cute. She should be fine in a little while. Dad is in jail. So he can't hurt us. He scared me tonight.” Suzette said and started crying again.
The clerk called me back and allowed Suzette to go with me along with Mr. Rowland. Tina had stayed at the house with her Mom to clean up the mess I had made. I would have done it for them if they had let me, but Mr. and Mrs. Rowland wouldn't hear of it. Once inside I realized that Mom and I weren't being treated like royalty because of Mom's position over the hospital, instead it was because of Mr. Rowland. He was important here in the ER and it showed. They allowed Mom and I to be placed in a room together and let Suzette stay with us. Normally they would have made her stay out in the waiting room.
I was X-rayed and I was sown up by a plastic surgeon that was actually going home for the night and he did so well you could barely see where I had been cut. Mom wasn't so lucky. They had to staple her cut up. You couldn't tell it though because it was under her hair. The ER doctor came in and told Mom and I that we were going to be admitted for the night to keep an eye on us because I had a hairline fracture above my right eye and Mom had a hairline fracture under the cut. She got them to put us in the same room so she wouldn't be worried about me.
Suzette was sleeping on the couch in the room and I woke up sometime in the night and saw her trying to get comfortable. “Sis are you OK?” I whispered.
“No I can't get to sleep on this thing. They must have used it in the inquisition.”
“Then come and get in bed with me.” I said without giving it another thought.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, come on you are my sister, no one will say anything.” I said and scooted to one side of the bed. Suzette got in and pulled the covers up as she turned her back to me. I scooched up to her back and put my arm around her waist, I felt her warm soft body and felt a safety that I hadn't felt in a day or two. I went straight back to sleep and slept really good that night. I was awakened by a nurse coming in and taking my vital signs. When she finished she briefly stroked my hair and smiled at me then she moved over to mom”s bed and took her vitals. Mom woke up and looked over at Suzette and I snuggled up together. Mom had a bandage like a hat on her head and a big bruise on her forehead. I was so shocked to see her like that. We had always known that Dad had a temper but nothing like that.
Mom asked. “Are you all right this morning?”
“Yes Mom. My head hurts some, but I am OK. How are you?”
“The same as you.” She said and pushed the button for the nurse.
“Mom what happened last night?” I asked.
“I don't know sugar. Your dad came home in a bad mood and when I tried to talk to him he exploded. There were a couple of times I thought he was going to hit me. Then he threw me against the wall and I don't remember much after that.” Mom started crying just as the nurse came in and she had to explain what was going on. She needed to go to the toilet so the nurse put the rail down on the bed and helped her up. I put my head down on the pillow facing away from Suzette lying there thinking about the events of last night. Something must be wrong with Dad for him to go off like that. Mom was right things are tense right now, but a lot more than she could have ever believed.
Suzette rolled over and threw her arm and leg over me effectively trapping me where I was. I pushed her arm back, but she threw it back over me, about that time Mom came out of the toilet and I gave her best “I'm in trouble look.” “Help please.”
The nurse and Mom both struggled with Suzette and finally got her to roll back and I came out of the bed like I had been shot out of a cannon and took my turn in the toilet. When I came back Suzette was sprawled all over the bed sound asleep. I just sat down in one of the chairs in the room which was much more comfortable to me than the bed anyway. Mom came over and sat down next to me and we sat there watching Suzette snore. Mom suddenly began snickering and was trying to keep it quiet. I realized that she was laughing at Suzette and I began giggling with her. The two of us together made enough noise to wake her and she sat up with a serious case of bed hair. And saw us staring at her.
“What?” She demanded.
“You snore.” I said.
“I do not. Mom Michelle is being mean.” She said as she sat up. She still had her clothes on from yesterday and her hair was standing straight up
I was reminded of the Bride of Frankenstein movie where the woman's hair was standing straight up on top of her head with a big white stripe down the center. I started laughing at her and when I told her why she looked at me and said. “Go look in a mirror yourself.”
I stopped laughing when Mom nodded yes at me. I looked in the mirror and my hair was just as bad. Suzette was giggling at me as I turned and did my best Frankenstein imitation and walked over to her and growled.
Dr. Grace came in after we had borrowed a brush and was almost presentable. “OK ladies I am going to do another set of X-Rays since you aren't glowing in the dark enough and then I am sending you home. The nursing staff has told me that you three are having entirely too much fun here. I do want to you Mrs. Rogers so could you follow me to the nurses lounge please.”
Mom stood up and followed her down the hall leaving Suzette and I to ourselves. “You know I thought Dad was going to kill you.” She said.
“I did too. I have never seen him that angry.” I said.
“I wonder what is going on with him?” Suzette said obviously worried about him.
“I don't know, but I still love him. I know he is in a lot of trouble with the police right now and he may spend some time behind bars, but I still love him.” I said. “To be honest right now I am more worried about Albert. I am having a hard time understanding why he did what he did. He was my best friend we played games together and I find out he was betraying me the whole time.”
“That is tough at least you still have Tina as a friend and she seems pretty solid to me. I am wondering why she has hid behind those baggy clothes all this time.” Suzette mused.
“I don't know, but she is really pretty out of them. The girls on the team made it a point to tell her that she looked great in the shorts and top you loaned her. By the way did I tell you that she is a natural at softball.”
“No you didn't. So she did well then?” Suzette asked.
“She did better than that. She was great. I loved watching her play.” I said remembering the double play that she completed and the two balls she drove over the fence.
“You were standing behind her. Right?” Suzette smirked.
“Yes I was in the out... Hey wait a minute are you insinuating that I was watching her butt?” I said, jumping up off the bed.
“You do watch girls butts, not boys. Am I correct?” Suzette said with an accusing wink.
“I watch girls butts. I even watch yours, I mean it is big and round and it sways from side to side and when you jump up and down it jiggles. I like your butt.” It was hard to say that with a straight face, but I did.
“Are you saying I have a big butt?” Suzette growled.
I remembered the rap song. “I like big butts and I cannot lie.”
The next thing I knew she had me pinned on the bed and was tickling me. Damn she is fast. “So do I have a big butt?”
“NO!” I yelled.
“Do I jiggle?”
“Yes.” And she began tickling me again.
Mom came in about that time and pulled Suzette off of me. “Suzette Rogers.” Uh oh it was a two namer. “What are you doing?”
“Mom, Michelle said I had a big butt that jiggles.” Suzette whined.
“Turn around. Jump.” Suzette did both. “He's right.” Mom deadpanned.
“Thanks for the support there Mom.” Suzette huffed.
“Now that we have that settled sit both of you and she indicated the bed I was sitting on. “Michelle you will have those stitches out in three to five days at Dr. Grace's office. I will have mine out at the same time. Michelle also have a hair line fracture of the right eye orbit above the right eye, that will leave a nasty bruise for the next three to four days. You can still play ball on Saturday, however you need to take it easy. Both of you can return to school tomorrow. I Have the doctors excuses right here. You, Suzette will get a tetanus booster after biting your Dad. Now put your clothes on Michelle we are being discharged. So hop to it.” I got up and began hopping as did Suzette. Mom was not impressed and gave us the serious Mom look. I got dressed and we left.
We stopped at the Flop to get some lunch and I asked about Brittany. The Manager came over and took my hand in hers. “Brittany isn't here anymore.”
“Where is she?” I asked getting more and more worried.
“She's dead. She was found down by the river under a bridge.” The manager said with tears in her eyes. “I loved that girl she was like a daughter to me, and now she is gone.”
“What happened?” Mom asked as she brought the car to a halt in the garage.
“Her father tried to get custody of her and she ran. She hung herself under the bridge.” the tears turned into a river. “How did you meet her?”
“I have known her for quite awhile, but I talked to her at the doctor's office. She seemed sad.”
“She was the last two or three days. I couldn't get her to seek help because she was afraid that the doctor would call her father and he would find her.“ I am sorry for your loss.” I said as I walked away with tears in my eyes. Fortunately Mom had gotten our order to go so we took it and left.
“What's the matter?” Suzette asked when she saw that I had become very quiet and had been crying.“ The manager told me that Brittany is dead. She hung herself because her father was trying to get custody of her.” I said with tears in my eyes.
Suzette stammered “Wh... Why... What... I mean are you sure?” She realized the importance of that information in relation to last night.” You aren't considering the same thing are you?” No of course not. I'm just upset that she felt that was the only way out. Her life was hard. She lived in a flop house. She couldn't afford clothes that looked good or fit right. I learned from a guy at school that she had been tossed out by her family. That was before I actually got to talk to her. She kept saying that I needed the support of family and friends. I understand what she meant now, Mom had tears running down her face and was starting to sniffle. Suzette turned to her. “Mom I'm really excited to finally have the little sister I always wanted."
"I know I am sorry I can't imagine the horror of being told one of you two had done that.” She said and tears came to her eyes.
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