Chapter 16 - On the Job

When summer is around the corner and you're just plain sick of working and you need to get away, every state has a preferred playground. New York City denizens head for the Catskills, Wisconsonites head for the lake country, Nebraskans head for - well I really don't know just where Nebraskans would head for with so much of the state being featureless prairie, but they must have someplace special. Be that as it may, many Portlanders tend to flock to the McKenzie River Valley.

That's not surprising, as there are lakes and rivers and waterfalls and trees galore, not to mention interesting fields of black lava only a few miles away.

Once you've headed down Route 126, you'll find innumerable motels, hotels, cabins, RV parks, resorts and B&Bs just waiting to collect your money and offer you a relaxing getaway. If you want excitement, it isn't hard to find whitewater rafting. If you like golf, you're in luck. Hot springs? Sure thing! Those lava fields mean that there is lots of hot magma near enough to the surface to warm many a spring.

Some of these islands of delight are new and modern, some have been there since Hector was a pup. As you can tell from the antiquated expression that means they have been there since the automobile was an exciting new invention, and have hung on through several generations of family operation.

So it was with the Triple Creek Ranch, so named because it sat near where two small streams joined the McKenzie River. The current proprietors, Russ and Rose Russo, were the fifth generation of their family to entertain guests while the weather was clement, then hunker down and hope for the occasional cross-country skier or crazy snowmobiler during the winter. They wouldn't be appearing on the list of the Forbes 500 anytime soon, but they loved it and made a decent living at it, not to mention providing employment for several locals.

The main building, naturally built of wood harvested from the surrounding forests back in the 1920s, had twenty five rooms and a rustic lounge. If you wanted privacy, there were a dozen cabins set back in the woods.

The swimming pool was naturally heated by mixing the nearby hot spring with water from the normal stream and remained toasty year round. The more adventurous guests - probably those with Scandinavian blood running in their veins - were even to be seen swimming with snow on the ground. Not a bad place to spend your summer vacation - even if you had to work there to do it.

The trio pulled up in front of the Triple Creek Ranch, where they were effusively greeted by Rosie's Uncle Russ. If you're a Disney fan, Uncle Russ is easily described. Think of the Chief in the restaurant scene in Lady and the Tramp. You have Russ perfectly - broad, effusive, wearing a tall white hat and flour-covered apron since he had just come from the kitchen where he was baking home-made bread for the evening meal.

"Cara mia!" Uncle Russ cried. The apparition exuded white dust and spread it's arms wide in welcome.

"Uncle Russ!" responded Rosemary. "Don't you dare get flour all over my new dress! Like it?"

Rosie spun around to flare the skirt and gave her uncle a coquettish smile.

"You make an old man's heart beat faster. Your aunt will have me popping those blood pressure pills by the handful if you get any more beautiful."

"Go on with you! I brought the troops with me, Unc. You remember Sheila from last year and this is her friend Polly."

"And now I'm going to need to pop pills by the bucketful! When the tourists discover the beautiful women at my resort we will have to build an addition to handle the crowds."

"Want me to stand out by the road and flag them down for you, Unc?"

"The sheriff, he would not approve. Too many accidents already as the tourists get distracted by the beautiful scenery and fill the ditches. ROSALIE!" he suddenly bellowed. "THEY'RE HERE!"

Moments later his wife bustled out and flour-free hugs were exchanged all around.

"Sheila, it's so good to have you back again. And Polly, welcome to our little family. I hope you will enjoy yourself this summer."

"I'm sure I will, Mrs Russo."

"None of this Mrs business! I'm Rose, even if my brother named his lovely daughter Rosemary to confuse all of us at family reunions. Around here she is Little Rose. Rosemary, you know where your room is. Take your things up while I show Sheila and Polly to their cabin. We decided to put you in the one farthest from the main building, That's the one that gets the least use, people don't want to walk so far these days."

"That will be fine with us, Rose."

"I hope you don't mind sharing a bed, all the cabins have queen beds."

"I'm sure we'll be able to muddle through. You don't snore, do you Polly?"

"You'll just have to find out tonight. When I'm asleep I don't notice if I'm snoring."

"I'll let you know if you do. You may even survive the experience."

"Sheila, control yourself," chided Rose. "It's too late to hire a new girl for the summer. Besides, nobody would want to dig a hole for the body with all the tree roots around here."

"I'll behave, Auntie."

"Fat chance," muttered Polly, but only Sheila could hear her.

"I can't believe how you arranged this, Sheila!" exclaimed Polly. "And you said you were over your wild woman stage."

The cottage was very homey; queen bed, kitchenette, table with wooden chairs, dresser, and even a small desk. The bathroom was small but had a shower and built-in heater for the cooler nights - no need to freeze when taking your shower.

"Sure beats going all the way to the cabin to let Polly come out and play, doesn't it?"

"Hey! Nice bed," Polly said as she flopped down on it."

"Enjoy it while you can. We have about forty-five minutes before we have to be up there to serve dinner."

"What?"

"We're here to serve dinner, lover, from five to seven. Breakfast hours are seven to nine and they don't serve lunch since most of the tourists are out touristing during the day. Note the uniforms hanging over there? We put them on and go up to do the job that's allowing me to share that bed with my girlfriend."

"And then I suppose we have to do the dishes?"

"Nope, the kitchen staff does that. The tourists want to see our lovely, feminine asses sashay about the dining room, so get your lovely, feminine ass up and put on your lovely, feminine skirt. Just be careful to keep your lovely, feminine ass far enough from the lechers so you don't get grubby fingerprints on it."

"They'd have to be real hard up to grab my ass."

"You have a lot to learn about being a girl. There are some guys that would grab any ass that has a skirt over it. Put a skirt on the Sasquatch and he'd have to be careful with some of those guys."

"I'd like to see what a lady Sasquatch would do if someone grabbed her ass."

"Get it on film and we wouldn't have to work this summer."

"Does this uniform include a body cam?"

"With your hair looking like that you'd better hope not. Come over here and let me fix it."

"Is my makeup still OK?"

"Looks good. We go real lite on the makeup here; casual atmosphere, you know. As long as they don't mistake you for Paul Bunyan you'll be OK."

"Did Paul wear pantyhose? I think I'm going to have to invest in some stockings, pantyhose are rather constricting for my anatomy."

"You back to that lumberjack song again?"

You're the one who brought up Paul Bunyan."

"So I did. You'll do, so we ought to head up to the lodge and see if you get your ass pinched."

"So long as it's not a cop pinching me for impersonating a waitress."

"What am I supposed to do?" queried Polly.

"Just follow me around tonight. It isn't so hard," answered Rosemary.

"That's easy for you to say…"

"Just watch… Hi Mr England, so glad you could stay with again this year."

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, Rosie. What's on the menu tonight?"

"Roast beef or chicken Kiev."

"You went all the way to Russia to get a chicken?"

"Nah, they caught it trying to cross the border and - what can I say?"

"So they kept it on ICE until it was ready to cook."

"I start talking politics and my goose is cooked, Mr England."

"I'll get the chicken Kiev, I wouldn't want the poor thing to have died in vain. And who is this lovely young woman standing behind you?"

"This is Polly, she's just started and she's shadowing me to learn the job."

"Wonderful, I would think working here would be a pleasure. Not that I know anything about working any more, I'm retired."

"I've never been a waitress before, so I hope I can keep the orders straight."

"You'll do fine. I can't imagine Russ or Rose hiring someone who wasn't up to the job."

"You're very kind."

"Nah, I'm a grouch but nobody ever pays any attention to me."

"Since Mr England seems to have left us, Polly, we should go on to the next table," grinned Rosemary.

"I'm exhausted!"

"Having second thoughts about being a working woman, lover?"

"I'm so beat I can't think. How could I do it twice?"

"By the way, you were great. You must have some girl genes in you somewhere, you were even cracking a joke or two by the end of dinner."

"Once I stopped being scared it felt pretty good to be able to just be me. Other than this damned pantyhose."

"Got to take the good with the bad."

"I'm still going to try stockings. I wonder if there's any place near here to get some."

"Polly, there's no place near here for anything. That's why it's a vacation spot. You'd be better off to order on line. Take your laptop up to the lodge and go shopping, girl."

"Tomorrow. I haven't the energy right now."

"Hey - it's only eight o'clock. Time to party!"

"Do I know you? Help! There's a strange woman in my bed!"

"That's my line, lover. Women don't get much stranger than you."

"I suppose you have a point. You really did this all summer last year?"

"Yup! Serve breakfast in the morning then take care of the rooms. Russ feeds us at noon, then we can relax until dinner. Tomorrow we can talk to Rose and the part-timers and set the schedule so we can have our days off and go play."

"You go play, I'm going to take a shower."

"Want company?"

"Think you'll fit?"

"Only one way to find out."