Road to Myself 21: On the Road Again

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Road to Myself - 21: On the Road Again
Annette MacGregor

After only being on the road (with work) three weeks out of fifteen months it seems my luck has changed. All of August (except for the week of Vacation) was spent at a client in Pennsylvania. Now, I find myself commuting to the DC area. Working out of town has it's ups and downs!

If it's not been obvious from previous blogs, I'm a consultant for a major hardware/software manufacturer. As a result, I work on projects with our various clients (software side - mostly). When I'm lucky, the work can mostly be remote, or at least in a simple commute. (This was the case for most of the last year and a half.) August had me traveling to Pennsylvania (About a four (4) hour drive... So I had to camp out in a hotel...)

If you didn't know, packing TWO (2) wardrobes is a tad more difficult than one. Extra shoes and the works. Danged inconvenient, if you ask me. LOL But, it's that or spend the time away from home in guy mode. I do get out less often, at home, with the older daughter not in University any more. *sighs* So, this helps on that front.

The down side is how much harder it is to keep to a diet when I'm traveling. So many places to eat serve way too much food, and I still have to FIGHT myself to not "clean your plate". (I fight that battle at home, but since I can be the one filling the plate, I can use smaller servings! That's a big help.) Most "business" hotels have decent exercise rooms - so if work allows, (and I try to make sure), I get in a long workout on non-travel days. But, when traveling it's hard.

This trip - being when it is, I missed my younger daughter's first day in the High School... I did get a report though. So far, she really likes her teachers. One of them, she was a bit creeped out by... She said - after he read attendance - he spent the rest of the class keeping looking at her. As soon as she told my wife and older daughter they both knew why he did it. The older daughter had been in his class nine years ago... He was recognizing the name (and face to a large extent) but not sure why. He's a good teacher, so I'm sure there'll be no issue. Just wish I'd been able to be at home.

Now, I'll miss her debut on the field in the Marching Band (first home game, on a brand new field) is Friday evening. My train's not scheduled to leave until about 6pm). *sighs* (I'm going to try to get out early so I can get there, assuming they play, given the rain.) Don't care much about the football game, but do enjoy the band. Even more, I like to be able to support my kids!

I'm back down here next week, for the same client. Then, I may be working on another client down here through the end of the year. Sounds like I'll be able to be remote for much of that one! YEAH.

Oh - what's all this about? I've been getting out, for dinner, in the evenings. Luckily it's warm, as I forgot to bring a jacket for Anne. Silly me. And, a guy's trench coat? No, I don't think so. But, maybe I'm wrong. Yesterday morning, all suited up, trench coat, pony tail... I stopped by the front desk to report the VERY leaky faucet in the tub. The gentleman behind the counter looked up and said, "How can I help you, ma'am." I assure you, I did a double take. That's NOT something that's happened to me in the past two decades. I have to WORK at it to consistently get ma'am'd in person. (Still can't manage on the phone.) It was all I could do to keep from checking if I'd accidentally put on earrings or my necklace was showing, or something... I did check LATER, and no, none of those things.)

Makes me wonder what people see, when they look. It really does. Oh, in case I wasn't clear, I didn't complain at his reference. :-)

Last night, I met the President of the LGBT advocacy group for my company (I'm on the board). We had a ladies night out. There was a nice Asian restaurant around the block from my hotel. A tad on the expensive side, but the food was very good. Company was good, too. To hear her talk, she has quite the wardrobe - taking "retail therapy" every chance she gets. LOL

What's next? I don't know. I do need to work out how and when I'll start coming out at work, and that needs to be before the open enrollment period (benefits wise) if I want to take advantage of the trans medical benefit! (It's NICE to have a deadline, I think.) I believe I've made it clear to all of you that I'm doing my dangdest to get through this with my family intact. Sometimes, it feels like I'm getting nowhere. A friend pointed out to me, on more than one occasion, that perhaps their not telling me when THEY're ready to take the next step is because I'm not pushing... And they think I'm not pushing because it has less urgency. *sighs* Sounds like a catch-22 to me. But, things are happening. If I can work remotely for much of the rest of the year, I'll be able to get a lot of those things moving along. AND, I'll be there when needed, by my family.
Thanks to all two dozen readers. I appreciate all of your clicks, and specially your comments. :-)

What's next? How will my trip to DC (Arlington, VA) go? Time will tell. In any event, if you got this far, thank you. If anything I've said strikes up questions please ask. (Not that I expect anyone to get this far, mind you... LOL)

Anne

Comments

RTM-21

Hi

2 wardrobes? Where on Earth do you keep everything. It must take a lot of space.

It's nice to hear that you are having opportunities to be the real you more and more and there is still no objections from your family. So out with family, and no out with at least one person at work. Step by step you appear to be inching forward towards your goal, but doing it in a planned way to take everyone with you.

Well done

Hugs

Karen

I always read your blog to the end, since I started reading it.

I don't usually have much to say though...

About struggling not to "clean your plate" though... that's really not a "girl" thing, I don't think. Heck, traditionally in Japan, a clean plate means bring more food.

I'm perfectly willing to eat only until I'm full. My body used to fail at giving me notice in time though... I've noticed with the herbs I've been taking that this is becoming less of a problem, for some reason. Whether that's because of the changes in my hormones, or what, I don't really know.

Abigail Drew.

Clean Plate...

Yes, these days, clean plate issue is a boy thing. But, my wife and I were both brought up to clean our plate... we were both told "there are starving people in ____ that would love that food." and such. We know many others, our age, with the same issue. And, the feeling is that it was caused by our parents being brought up during the "great depression" of the '30s... When food was occasionally hard to come by.

On the "full" notice. The rate of eating has been shown to impact that. Some people eat too fast (and, yes, I fell into that habit while in the service, and have been working to break myself of it ever since). By eating to fast, you can easily eat beyond the "full" point and the body says until you're way past the full point...

So many factors go into appetite, full, calorie burning, etc. Hormones are just one of them.

Thanks,
Anne

I agree... I think it's a

I agree... I think it's a cultural thing too... Don't waste money, don't waste food. What you put on your plate you've got to eat.

I guess it depends on the restaurant. Some have so small portions that they seem to want to starve you and others give you a meal for two...

If someone asks you can still lie to them that doctor told you you shouldn't eat that much at dinner/lunch ^^

"boy" thing either...

ROFL, and yeah, I did check back. Always do. In fact, I checked back and then saw your pm at the same time!

Anyways, yeah. To me, it's just a cultural thing. And not really just your generation, either. My parents were always on about cleaning your plate too. Yeah, over time, I've learned to try to predict what I need as accurately as possible, because of their harping, but when I was younger I'd always just go back at em with a sarcastic rejoinder about how if I could, I would be perfectly willing to give them my scraps. Ah well, the stupidity of youth.

When I do my own portions, I try to predict what I'm going to need as closely as I can, and if I'm fixing something that innately has a larger serving size than I can handle on my own, I ask around if anyone else would like what I'm having.

When eating out, I try to order something with how much I will manage to eat in mind, at restaurants where I can, I doggy-bag any extra, at restaurants where I can't, I just chuck it.

I try not to be wasteful, but at the same time, putting it on as weight is just as wasteful as throwing it in the trash. In my mind, at least.

Always has been that way with me when I'm not in one of my depressions. This is actually the first year I've made it this far WITHOUT a depressive episode. Here's to hoping I make it all year!

Abigail Drew.

I should point out...

I should point out - if I've not yet in a blog... Up until the mid '90s, I couldn't gain weight to save my life. I could eat anything/everything(or not much anything for that matter) and my weight stayed withing ten (10) lbs of where it was when I started 8th grade in '71! Then, in my mid 30s, I began to gain weight. I went on a diet and picked up my exercise and dropped much of what I'd gained - and held it there for a number of years... Then, back in oh, probably 2006-7, I felt myself needing to be me, so one summer I went through about a gallon of ice cream a week - my misguided plan to make myself too fat to pass, so I'd not try. A year or so later is when my thyroid problem was identified... When I was put onto the meds to control it - I put on a little over forty (40) pounds in less than two months! This was all NEW weight. And, most of it was in the 2nd-5th weeks... I was traveling a lot then too (for work) and not weighing myself... I just noticed things getting tighter (& even bought new slacks that fit). But, once I realized what it was, I was able to drastically reduce my caloric intake (and up the exercise) until my body got used to the hormone suppressant. I peaked then... I'm now about 20-25 lbs lower than I was then. I was 40 lbs lower just before diverticulitis hit last year, but I've been fairly stable since stabilizing, and was losing again by last week (before getting sent down here to DC)...

I have identified some of the triggers to my over eating and am taking aim at them. But, some are hard to avoid (stress at home... slow progress - or more accurately PERCEIVED slow progress). It's self defeating, I know. But,I'm working on it. Matter of fact, I should go hit the hotel Gym now... LOL

Anne