Little speedbumps in my life right now

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Well, it's kind of funny, but just now, when I feel like I've finally got my swing back again as a writer, life is stepping up and taking my time and energy.

I don't know how many of you know or remember me, and I really don't mind if you don't, but a few years back I was posting here almost every day. Then I was absent for about three years, and now I'm back again. It was difficult to get back into things, to return to writing every day... even though the story I'm currently working on has been in my mind for more than three years, and is mapped out down to the individual chapters. It still takes sitting down and writing all those words, or it doesn't get done.

But anyway...

My daughter is a teenager, a freshman in high school, and although she is a good writer herself, for some reason she suddenly believes she isn't. And of course her self-doubt arrives at the same time that her school is asking her to write essays and journals and all sorts of things pretty much every day.

It's so hard to try to help her. In the first place, I'm her parent, which in her mind means I'm a pain and I don't know anything. Second, she wants to do it by herself. But though she tells me, "Just leave me and let me do it. It will get done," she is in exactly the same point she was a week ago.

At my job, my desk has been moved to not such a nice place. It's not as bad as the Office Space movie, because I'm there with a load of people that I like, and I know that *they* at least are important to the company, so it doesn't mean I'm getting a hint to start looking elsewhere.

At the same time, people have begun to exercise unreasonable expectations of me, and they judge my work mostly on the things that I really should NOT be doing and don't have time to do. I'm both frightened and angry about it. I've tried to talk to my boss, but though he's conciliatory when we talk, he does nothing to change the situation, and there isn't anything I can do except slog on.

Anyway... I hate to complain. I feel I have no right. Even if things didn't change from the way they are right now, I'd still be incredibly fortunate.

But these things do get in the way of writing.

Not emotionally so much. Just in terms of time and energy.

Any who... I guess I need to find a way to carve a bit of time out of my newly rearranged day, and use that time to write again. Most days I get to, but other days I let get stolen from me.

Still, I'm hopeful and curious about what the future will bring.

Comments

What a silly statement

Frank's picture

Of course you are remembered!!!! Although I had pictured you as younger than being able to have a Freshman daughter :)

Take your time, and do what you have to do in real life. We will still be here (im)patiently waiting for you to get back to us.

I must admit despite loving all the previous Marcie stories, I'm so behind on reading at the moment I haven't started the current one yet. Although I also may re-read the others first anyways if/when I get caught up.

No pressure from us Hon

{{Squeeze}}

Frank

Hugs

Frank

The Theory of Emotional Relativity...by Elaine Einstein?

Andrea Lena's picture

...doesn't that state that pain is pain, and that we all deal with frustration and hurt and disappointment and setbacks that pull and push at us?

Why would you have no right to express those emotions? Which concern doesn't warrant our attention? Your talented child who feels now that she's not; the insecurity many gifted folks feel? You as our friend here who is misunderstood and mis-characterized at work? The harried author herself who has less time to devote to something she enjoys because of the demands on the rest of herself? Your presence is certainly a good thing, and when time is more kind you'll be more available here, but it still must be hugely disappointing, even in the midst of blessings. My best to you, dear heart.

  

To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L'Engle
Love, Andrea Lena

Yes, life is like that sometimes.

I've had problems too where I just can't seem to find the time to write. I know exactly what you're going through with your daughter, I have three and fortunately they're grown and living on their own. Going through the dad doesn't know squat is a difficult time, especially with girls. I have six kids, three and three and like I tell my friends, girls are the easiest most loving creatures on earth, UNTIL puberty hits. After that it's all down hill and to be perfectly honest they're worse than boys. They will look you straight in the eye with their I love you daddy pout and lie through their teeth and have you believing the world is flat. Boys on the other hand are for the most part animals from the moment they're born. Rough and tumble are their middle names. They get into trouble, but you can see it coming, but girls, oh my, how can you not trust them and believe every word they say. My daughters are going through the terrible teens with their own children and my wife and I can't help but laugh and tell them payback is a bitch. We all miss your stories, but take your time and hopefully you'll find a few moments to put something down for us to read, Arecee

that's kinda funny...

Not once growing up did my parents ever catch me out on a lie. Even now, any lies I'd told them then that I really wanted them to believe, they still believe to this day. I've since learned better, but find it's easier now to let them continue believing the lies than give them a wake up call.

I've also never really was "rough and tumble" - oh, I had more than my share of fights growing up, but I never instigated, I just won, (at least with peers, adults and older siblings not so much) which of course meant I was the bad one, because I'd usually win in a very over the top way.

I wonder if I revealed some of my lies now would that help my mother see me as other than her "son" making a big "mistake"? All my biggest mistakes were directly related to trying to be a son.

Ah well...

Hey Kaleigh,

I wasn't around 3 years ago, but since you've been writing here again this last time I've found I rather enjoy much of your work. I can quite understand the whole life getting in the way bit, please, don't feel bad about it at all. Though I do recognize the frustration of it all.

As to your daughter thinking she's talentless and having a rough time - we all go through that, especially as the hormones hit in puberty. I'm sure you probably went through it back then too. :) What to do about it to try to help her... Dunno! Probably not much you can do, if she's at all like I was back then, she'll grump even more if you try to encourage her. No use worrying yourself over something you really can't change. Eventually, she has to be the one to want to get out of her funk.

As for work... well, little you can do there either...

So, by all means, take some time away again if you have to, just know you've got eager fans ready to pounce upon your return!

Abigail Drew.

9th grade daughters!

Oy, do I hear that one! I have one of my own... (It sucks to have to be out of state too...)

Has your daughter decided that boys are important? I see that - too often... (At least my daughter's not as bad as SOME her age, but still... Oy!)

Best of luck to you,
Anne

No boys yet

No, she isn't yet interested in boys. We still have all that ahead of us. ~laughs~

Good LUCK!

My older daughter waited until she was a Senior in HS before deciding to go that way. NO - not that she was uninterested before, but not willing to make the effort (and on the flip side she intimidated most who weren't her good friends - read self adopted brother - because she was so smart).

My 9th grader (through pushing by "friends" - one in particular who's way to boy crazy) started dating last year... The first two didn't work out (for different reasons)... But, she's found one she really likes... (He's quiet, and lets her talk. LOL) We'll see how that works out when baseball season starts back up... (Yes, he lives and breaths baseball...)

Enjoy these years. Yes, teens have their challenges (that they don't hesitate to share - and those they have but try to not share)... But, they're wonderful people (or can be)... Most haven't gotten "set" in their ways/beliefs yet as well.

Anne

Of course I remember you.

Your stories were bright and cheerful even when bad things were happening to your characters. Writing a witty story with action and sensibility is a talent and you have it in spades.

I hope that your writing situation improves, and that your daughter feels empowered, through your encouragement of course, to get her work done too. :) Maybe it is just the old bears/honey thing.

Gwendolyn

Curious

kristina l s's picture

Or maybe annoying how the van of life just trundles up and some sod gets out and drops bloody great detour signs all over and then buggers off. Never mind the alternate route thing, you have to figure that out for yourself. Your stuff is not my stuff or their stuff or whoevers stuff but it can and does get in the way. I know how that goes. Do what ya do at your own pace eh.

Oh and try to resist snipping the valve stems off when you spot that van parked up at some future date won't you.

Kris

Best wishes from the other side of the ocean

I can only say that you are missed round here, never mind remembered.

I can only applaud the fact that you find any time at all, which puts me to shame considering I have far more time than you do to write and yet seem to achieve less.

Well, here are some good luck wishes to hope that you do manage to find the time and that your teenage daughter gets over her hurdle. Alright, that second one is perhaps expecting a little too much, but you know what I mean :)

Good luck Kaleigh

Hugs

Nick

Hmm...

Extravagance's picture

I was adopted, and I have no knowledge of my genetic background/inheritance. At this point, it is impossible to say how big the "speedbumps" in my life will become.

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