Of Dirty Dogs and some Men

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Sorry I need a place to vent Before I explode,. I would like to share some recent information I just discovered. My step Father the terror of my life passed away last year, he received a glowing sendoff by his new family and friends. New because when my mother died in 1999 January 1, he remarried and lived for another 12 years. His obituary held a wealth of information including all of his surviving kin from his recent marriage, all of his community service his square dancing with his new wife etc.
His wife of 35 plus years and there adopted child {ME} was not even mentioned. It was as if his life began in 1999 January 10. Nine short days after, My step father with no public announcement, no obituary other than the county required two or three lines nothing noting her tireless effort to force the county to enforce water quality standards, meals on wheals, work with the counsel of the aged, fighting the electric regulating board and the local power company who over charged old people and the poor, There was no memorial service for her many friends who loved and worked with her, He then cremated my mother then did not inform the state I was a surviving member of the family. He had in fact told those he wanted to that I died of Aids and being a drug out sex worker in Philadelphia. When I was a mother of 2 children in Seattle.

I was told of my mothers death when he sent me a package of a few surviving papers from my childhood. On one of those papers there was a post-it note with the words Your mom died in January. I received this September 1999, remember she died January 1 1999. I guess beings he had remarried January 10 1999 he had been to busy living this new proper shining example of the White Male dream. He was a legend in his own mind but a craven coward in reality. Truly a person with no honor.

My biggest consolation is that I out lived the bully who terrorized my life, and the fact my mother was awaiting him when he arrived in Redemption city. I would had loved to hear that conversation.

I am not bitter but sadden he was such a putts but I also needed to put a public record what he had done to note that My mother was a great women who raised me to be a stand up fair and decent person, and a good mother, She deserves a memorial and to be remembered.

Thanks for listening I return the soap box so another may use it

Comments

I wish I could do more...

Andrea Lena's picture

...I thank you from the bottom of my heart so as in some small way to honor your mother's memory. May she rest in peace and may many more come to know what a truly lovely lady she was.

  

To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L'Engle
Love, Andrea Lena

She stood strong and fought

She stood strong and fought a good battle to protect myself as her child, and later those who could not fight back.

She reminds me of an old Haiku, which I have altered for her.

"See the shell of your mother, she gave herself utterly away".

Thank You
Michele

With those with open eyes the world reads like a book

celtgirl_0.gif

Sadly,

Angharad's picture

life often seems to reward the bullies and scumbags while demeaning those who have achieved for others. The only consolation is that those who do genuine good works don't seek reward or adulation, simply that justice is done.

Sounds like your mum was in the latter category and I'm glad you're able to honour her memory.

Angharad

Thank you Angharad very much.

Thank you Angharad very much. It will be my mother that my Daughters will remember and they will forget He who will not be named again. His name is dead but Mary A Wilkinson Name will live in our minds, she is the reason I am alive and a sterling example of someone to emulate.

Huggles
Michele

With those with open eyes the world reads like a book

celtgirl_0.gif

Misha, it saddens me...

Me to read this and I genuinely feel your pain, but I'm reasonably sure your mother will never meet him again for I'm certain he went the other direction! (((Hugs))) Taarpa

I've heard it said...

...that the best revenge and the best tribute are to live well.

A brief and soon-to-be forgotten spite upon the one that deserved vengeance and oblivion, and enduring, oft-remembered glory unto the one who continues still to deserve honor.

-Liz

Successor to the LToC
Formerly known as "momonoimoto"

Of Dirty Dogs and some Men

Yes, your victory over that coward needs to be acknowledged here by your friends. And to me, your Mother is indeed in Heaven. But I seriously doubt that he is.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine