bit of a tough day last night

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A bit of a tough night last night, the evil "tape" that runs in my head and jumps on every failure and mistake I make as proof of my utter worthlessness was running hot. I really need a more positive tape in my brain, but at this point, a loop of the Bee Gee's greatest hits would be an improvement ....

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Supposedly

there are ways to reprogram those tapes, or at least reduce their frequency of occurrence. One thing I vaguely recall is that one should STOP those tapes when one notices them playing. Alcohol is not recommended, but I can understand why it's used; likewise any Illegal Recreational Chemical. But stop them HARD. It's an effort, but possibly worth it.

Ellen

This is good advice, it's

This is good advice, it's hard as hell to follow but it's good advice. I have the same problem with taps in my head, repeating the same litany of negative commits. Another thing you can do besides just trying to stop think about it is try to make a positive tape as it were. Find some good qualities in you or some things you are proud of and talk to yourself about them. It helps if you have other people telling you positive things too but that's not really something we can control to well. You might tell your friends that you are having a hard time and some positive encouragement and complements would be helpful.

Do things that give you a since of accomplishment and make sure to tell yourself that you did a good job. Something that can be really helpful is doing kind acts for other people. People are social animals and when that monkey part of your brain thinks you are building up your social rank by being helpful to others it makes you happier. That's part of the reason some people volunteer all the time, they get physical pleasure from it and it boosts their ego.

Tape can't jump. Only vinyl.

And another problem is - you can only make recording worse. Loose high and low frequencies, get noise from dust around you and such.
So first you need to upgrade your turntable to tape recorder. Then you can adjust record to be comfortable to you.
Next step is to go digital. Then you can write a program and be comfortable at all times.
Yes, I'm evil in addition to manic :-E~~ :-)
But... "Keep your eyes on goal. Believe in yourself. Don't notice any obstacles."

Good luck in your turntable upgrade!
Evil racer. Quite manic. :-)

CBT

Have you tried cognitive behaviour therapy? I believe it's quite helpful.