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I went to a transgender support group the other day (Tuesday) which is a good step for me. It was the second group I've attended and this one is somewhat close to my house.

An interesting comment came up, even though no one made an issue about it, and it got me thinking.

Does one need to dress in female clothing to be considered Trans? I myself only own one dress and two bras and have yet to have opportunity or desire to wear the dress out (partly because of a hairy back... okay, mainly because of a hairy back)

Comments

You are trans if you know you

You are trans if you know you are trans. It really is not a thing that has to be defined for you, you just know if your body and mind/spirit don't agree. Outsiders might have difficulty in accepting you as trans, but for the sake of your internal peace of mind, they don't count. No one starts that transition journey being perfectly fem. It takes time, it takes planning, and it takes a sense of humor and it involves physical pain and often emotional pain as well. However, you have to be there to complete the journey. No one else can do it for you.

CaroL

The short answer is...

The short answer is NO... What you wear doesn't make any difference on who you are...

Of course, it depends on what you mean by "trans"... If you mean "transsexual". That's where you've got a brain of one gender, and sexual organs/secondary sexual characteristics of the "other... Clothing doesn't even show up.

Having a wardrobe? In my final purge (I went through several phases where I buried myself) I donated all my clothing (that I'd kept hidden in packing boxes for years)... So, I went several years with no obvious women's clothing. (I had women's jeans and sneakers, but they fit better - and they were more unisex than anything else... I was careful to pick neutral to masculine colorings to protect my "image" as a guy.) Did that make me any less a transexual? Nope.

That said - some trans support groups have others that are included in the "transgender" umbrella term (cross dressers, poly gender, gender queer, etc...) From the ones I've talked to... (And I've not talked to all of the variations by any stretch of the imagination.)... What you wear doesn't make you any more or less transgender.

That's my opinion.

Now... You will likely find people out there who say you can't possibly be XYZ if you can manage to not dress up all the time. One thing I heard from someone here - was that in the typical support group the cross dressers would "dress to the 9s" while the transsexuals would likely be in jeans and a t-shirt. That wasn't what I saw in the one support group I was able to find and attend (it disbanded after that meeting as the host found she couldn't host it due to insurance issues...). So... Take it for what it's worth...

Good luck.
Annette

Who and/or What am I?

Hope Eternal Reigns's picture

There MIGHT be someone (or MAYBE two) people 'out there' who know me or understand me better than I do myself. (BUT I DOUBT it BIG time) But I'm the one who knows how I think and how I feel about myself. (a LOT of the time that isn't really very highly) I wear a set of coveralls to work in - because they cover all of me, for protection, and they are loose and as cool as total coverage can be in my opinion. (Outside of socks and shoes they are ALL I wear, I know TMI right?)

Where is all this going? I consider myself TG. (period,) I went through a time where I HAD to wear a dress or skirt - out - once in a while to feel 'right'. I don't seem to have that 'need' anymore.I have LOTS of lingerie but mostly only wear panties these days. (I don't own any other underwear) The clothes don't seem to matter as much as they did when I first 'came out' to many of my friends. I still buy most of my clothes at women's shops but I haven't shopped for a LONG time. (Lack of $$$ has been a HUGE factor.)

Just some thoughts. (And I see they are a bit random.)

with love,

Hope

Once in a while I bare my soul, more often my soles bear me.

A ludicrous concept, if you

A ludicrous concept, if you ask me (And this is coming from somebody who wears dresses or skirts 97% of the time). Being trans isn't about clothes, it's about who you are. Most of the women at the support group I go to wear jeans or slacks most of the time. Even the cross-dressers don't always wear dresses, though they are more likely to.

Heck, you could wear men's clothes 24-7 and it wouldn't invalidate who you are.

Saless


"But it is also tradition that times *must* and always do change, my friend." - Eddie Murphy, Coming To America

Skirts

At home, almost exclusively. Usually with a T-shirt or rugby shirt. They are comfy and warm/cool depending. Trousers for work (uniform) and cycling kit for just about everything else.

What you wear is not who you are.

I had a skirt steak...

Andrea Lena's picture

...in my fajitas Tuesday. Does that count?

  

To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L'Engle
Love, Andrea Lena

To skirt or not.

Some of us get enough relief in writing stories. Others in dressing as a woman once in a while. Others can't live as men. And then there are those of us who are so pissed off at the bullshit that men have to put up with, that we say fuck it and kill ourselves by becoming women.

When I found out that I was a boy, the injustice of it was just horrific and then I had to spend the next 50 or so years living as the person I wasn't. So when I finally changed to my true self, I was more than ready and very angry.

I've gone absolutely stealth and spend a great deal of time learning to be my true self. I was forced to wear pants until I changed, and now that I do not have to it is a skirt or dress all the time. Today I had to go do some work for someone that required pants, but as soon as I got home I changed. It was surprised that I was feeling so angry over wearing pants.

G

Peer pressure

There is a lot of pressure on the non "GIRLYGIRL" trans to prove your femininity by outward expression.

My own experience was painfull as "GIRLY" doesn't come in size 5X.

People were all over me to dress more femme until they met my mother who was a truck driver. Compared to her I dress like that pink lawyer or Paris Hilton!!!

Peer pressure

There is a lot of pressure on the non "GIRLYGIRL" trans to prove your femininity by outward expression.

My own experience was painfull as "GIRLY" doesn't come in size 5X.

People were all over me to dress more femme until they met my mother who was a truck driver. Compared to her I dress like that pink lawyer or Paris Hilton!!!