Help me out of a scene

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I am desperate. I have written myself into this scene which NEEDS to take place, but I can not seem to be able to write my self out. Can any of you assist?

This is a scene from Healing a Princess.

Tonya found Monyka and herself seated at a raised table near the fireplace in the common room of the inn. Prince Caldric and Ambassador Kalgar were seated at a Dwarf sized table near by. Crystal goblets of water, glass mugs of ale and a crystal glass of white wine were waiting for them.
“Did you smell this up stairs too?” Prince Caldric asked.
“Doesn’t it smell delicious?” Tonya nodded.
Two Cavalrymen were pressed into service as servers for the Royal members. Tonya looked across the common room to the door of the kitchen which was slightly ajar. A veiled face peered out of the crack as the dark blue plates of trout were placed in front of her and Caldric.
Tonya smiled at the hidden face and watched as the door was suddenly closed. She looked over to see Monyka place a fork full of white flesh into her mouth then close her eyes.
“By the three Gods this is good.” Monyka announced.
Off on the other side of the room, a harp began making a soft sound as the player tickled the strings.
Tonya cut into the bread encrusted fish releasing a cloud of steam. She picked up a piece and placed it in her mouth. Flavours exploded in her mouth. She chewed slowly savouring each layer of flavor as it unfolded on her taste buds. “The love of Tanitha ! That is heavenly.”
The harpist missed a note, at the outburst, but recovered and continued the soft ballad. Tonya was half way through the fish when the kitchen door opened and the servers brought a plate of roasted vegetables. A few moments later a steaming pastries were set before them. One of the servers followed the pastries up with glasses of a dark red wine, poured into what looked to be Gerdies personal crystal.
The harpist’s notes melded into a more up beat song. A blonde, veiled dwarf stepped forward, her fingers tickling the strings of the harp and opened her mouth. A note as pure as any she had ever heard enveloped the room. The Dwarf’s voice ranged up and down the scale, going as low as a tenor and as high as a soprano. Tonya forgot to eat as she closed her eyes and listened to the voice that must have been a gift from Tanitha.
As the last note rang out, and diminished, nothing stirred. The people in the common room held their breath as they relished the music, trying to commit it's loveliness to their memories.
“Well sung,” Prince Caldric was the first to break the spell, “Well done indeed.”
The room as well as the cavern outside the inn was engulfed in the roar of applause. The blonde, sightless dwarf cutsied to the head table then whispered something to the other two bards. She handed the harp to one of her partners and began a more lively piece the other quickly joined on a flute. Dwarves in the room began to softly hit the tables with their fists in time with the music. The Riponian’s picked it up as well as the blonde bard began singing a song about marching off to a victorious battle.
At the chorus, the dwarves beat hard on their tables and sang loudly. By the third time through, the Riponian soldiers picked up on the tune and joined their friends by beating on the table. Monyka and Annyka joined by clapping their hands and smiling encouragement. Tonya just smiled and laughed as some of those near by messed up the words.
A cheer at the end of the song, from those in the common room seemed to shake the walls and as well as the floor as Dwarves lifted their mugs and drained their ale. The echo of their cheer could be heard bouncing around the cavern outside in the sudden silence.
The blonde took a drink of her own and began another rowdy song which her friends picked up on their instruments. Dwarves wiping suds from their beards laughed in recognition of the new tune.
Kadyr laughed, “I know this tune. We have different words to it.” He explained to a dwarven neighbor.
Tonya could hear voices raised out in the cavern. The Dwarven bard's lips curled into a smile as she too heard the commotion. She didn't however, change her lyrics.
A clammor of boots stomping the floor and fists pounding the tables deafened the diners. Dwarves and men or Riponia pounded one another on the back.

I need the blind Dwarven bard to meet with Monyka in private, or near private.

I will be ever in your debt.

A.A.

Write the scene you need

Write the scene after the missing one, something in that scene will suggest how to write the previous one. For me, sometimes just writing a paragraph works.

{{{;>

First thing...

Puddintane's picture

You have to get her out of the clot of musicians.

Up where the bigwigs are feasting seems appropriate, since entertainers often arrange to give the posh crowd the best seat in the house.

She could find her own way with a blind stick or be led, makes no matter, and she can pass a note, because the intended recipient has announced her presence and location by her cry of pleasure.

Exactly what business transpires, whether a hand is reached out, a note tossed in her general direction, or secret sign language is passed off as theatrical gestures makes no matter either.

Once close, anything is possible.

Cheers,

Puddin'

-

Cheers,

Puddin'

A tender heart is an asset to an editor: it helps us be ruthless in a tactful way.
--- The Chicago Manual of Style

The Old Stand By

I'm not familiar with the storyline, but a method I have seen used in the past is as follows (if the discussion does not need to be initiated immediately). Have your character who wishes to initiate the conversation to offer a reward in appreciation for the bard's skill, then when the bard comes forward, whisper a request to see her later. From that point, the assumed curiosity and ingenuity of bard can make the private discussion with little explanation.

If the conversation needs to happen immediately and your characters past is still a bit of a mystery. You can use Piddintae's recommendation, a technique used by Stephen Brust's of the character having established contact with the build of bards, which involved being some symbol of recognition. I also would not hesitate to utilize a bathroom break, a natural tool for conspirators.

Um, I con't understand the problem?

I think it is all wonderfully written. I was suspecting that the food was poisoned. WHEW !
Now, who is the blind dwarven, the one looking through the crack in the door. I know the blind dwarf can't see, but I was thinking some sort of second sight or who knows.

I know, no more blonde dye for me, I must seem really dense.

Khadija

Scene that might work

Here is a scene that might work. It is from a game of Dungeons and Dragons that I played.

Have the dwarven bard make a deal with a drow to sell dwarven ale to the Drow. Then have the drow conduct the meeting in a room in back with the person you want to meet with as a mediator on the deal. After the deal completes you can then meet in private without anyone being wise to your meeting. No one usually spy on someone after they have met with a drow due to fear of being killed by the drow or the fact that you were crazy enough to sell dwarven ale to a drow.

Hugs,
Jenna From FL
Moderator/Editor
TopShelf BigCloset

Hugs,
Jenna From FL
Moderator/Editor
TopShelf BigCloset
It is a long road ahead but I will finally become who I should be.

A familiar tune

Maybe the bard can approach Monyka and invite her to share the version of the song she knows. As she escorts Monyka to the rest of the bards she can whisper a request to speak to her in private.

Just a thought...

Huggles,

Winnie

Huggles,

Winnie
Winnie_small.jpg

If This Is...

...our shape-shifting trio once again, I'd expect the blonde bard to have enough control over the situation to find an excuse for the meeting -- especially since the three rescued Monyka and Kadyr once before.

One thought: It seems as though our bard has the folks in the common room roused and ready to march onward somewhere, even though there's no actual battle to march to. If the prince and his Riponian guests are sufficiently moved to do the same, and if the bard's two companions move to the front and lead the group on a roundabout march, Pied Piper style, through the castle or the immediate area, then she can catch Monyka (probably with Annyka) on her way out and take her/them aside. Kadyr's liable to miss them, though, unless he stays behind as well.

Best, Eric

Monyka's Dwarfen General

could know the blind Drarf and meet after dinner where he introduces them.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine