losing faith

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I am really struggling to hold on to my faith right now. I have had moments of doubts before, but not like this, where the idea of a heaven seems laughable. I feel 3/4 dead, just going through the motions.

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I have similar feelings

My argument goes along the lines of "If God really loved me, would he/she/it/them allow this shit to happen?" Why do some people go through life completely fulfilled as human beings, while others are treated with scorn simply because they can't conform to a stereotype?

The church has had several tries at getting rid of me and I kept going back. I might now vote with my feet.

Susie

Faith, the crisis

I do so "get it", with crisises in faith, struggling through one of my own just now. Still, I must keep reminding myself that I am not God, and can not know the reasons for personal struggle.

As a Christian, I was very devout, and studied very much harder after I began my new life. I remember one night, not long after I had been thrown out, that I sat reading the book of Job and Chapter 38:4 just leapt out at me.

A wave of greif over my lost family swept over me, and I lay on my bed sobbing and soaking the pillow, and asking God why? I remembered many people refering me to that book in the past when I was complaining. Crying out to God in the most ardent way I could, "I am sorry God, I am not like Job and never will be. He did nothing wrong and you let evil overcome him and he did not complain until right at the end. I am sorry I am such an abominable failure".

Just try to be patient with yourself and let the pain become part of you. It was hard for me to do that then, and today it is hard for me too. I'm just sitting here at my desk hoping that tomorrow I will feel better. As a Christian I struggled and as a Muslim, I still do once in a while.

• Khadijah
June 17, 2010 at 2:41 pm

I think I could be losing my Islam. It is not about my belief in Allah SWT. It was never about the Hijab; always wore it, maybe always will. It is not about somehow being a bit less than Men; needing their protection. It is not about the Praying. It is not about the fasting.

It is about the backbiting; the always having to measure up; the subtle rejections; being accused of being a Spy among the faithful; about not being Arab; about not knowing all the customs of the proper Muslimah, and having no way to learn them. It is about the things unspoken; about the enemy who torments me that I can not even see; of being attacked and not being able to defend myself.

I think I might be losing my Islam?

Much Peace

Khadijah

It hurts beyond any words could ever say

Andrea Lena's picture

when we can't feel the comfort we have come to rely upon; I wish there were words to say other than I know how you feel. My heart to yours, dear one.

She was born for all the wrong reasons but grew up for all the right ones.
Con grande amore e di affetto, Andrea Lena

  

To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L'Engle
Love, Andrea Lena

From personal experience,

I can tell you that God has never given anyone more than they can handle. I think maybe one should listen more with their heart than to the religious leaders and so-called christians. Speaking from experience (struggled and went agnostic for 25 years), I can tell you after you stumble He will be there to help you up; faith and prayer go a long way towards keeping the channel open between you and Him. Please feel free to PM me if you want to talk about it.
Take care and have faith
Diana

There is

not a lot I can say on the subject of faith. I'm not one of the faithful, never was or never will be really one of the faithful follower set. I do however believe, really believe. Knowing isn't something I don't think we'll ever be given until we see the hereafter. All you have to do to find your belief I've found is just get away from Man for a bit, just a nice walk in a park or the country and just sit relax and be peaceful I always find something that refills my belief even if it's just the breeze and sun on my face.

Bailey Summers

DorothyColleen: Adversity is

DorothyColleen:
Adversity is the test of personal strength. it is where we make the decision to follow our inner faith or to follow mankind. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger. God did not promise us he would not test us.
I've been through the valley on many ocassions and through faith I've made it through. If God brought us to it he will get us through it.
I just did some horrendous things with my family, I put them into a time of dispair through an action of revenge. One thing I did was ask God to forgive me, it doesn't matter how others feel about me, I was forgiven by God.
In my life though adversities brought on by people who I thought cared about me I learned that God has stood beside me at all times.
I have thought about suicide and I had a plan, a means and a way. I wrote a note and some one reached outot me and reminded me that God was always there for me to talk to.
He is a good listener an dhe will get you through that valley. Faith is blind trust and it is that faith in which we find God as our strength.
I'lll be keeping you in prayer, promise God you'll talk to him. he will in turn listen and talk to you, that I can assure you, I've had conversations with God.
Moses isn't the only one he's the first that God used to deal with the chosen people. Noah heard God speak. So its not a big deal if he talks to you, he will guide you through your adversities. Remember miracles happen everyday.

Jill Micayla
Be kinder than necessary,Because everyone you meet
Is fighting some kind of battle.

Jill Micayla
Be kinder than necessary,Because everyone you meet
Is fighting some kind of battle.

Doubt and Faith

erin's picture

Doubt is not the opposite of faith, it is the complement. If you had no doubts, you would have no use for faith or even feel the need for it.

Doubt is the pestle in the mortar of faith, grinding up thoughts, desires and experiences so they can be purified.

Without doubt, how would you know whether you had faith or not?

Doubt is a sword, separating truth from falsehood; faith is the shield you use while you wield your doubt.

Without doubt, you might believe anything, and credulity is not the same as righteousness.

Doubt will carve knowledge into wisdom and belief into faith if you will use it and master its use.

Doubt is the searchlight with which you can discover your faith and be safe.

No one can be said to have faith who has never doubted.

What is faith without doubt? A cloth without a seam, ready to unravel in the next wind.

What is faith without doubt? An untempered glass that will shatter at any foolish bump or jolt.

What is faith without doubt? Blind, deaf and mute. A blanket over your head will keep you warm as long as you stay in bed but if you are going somewhere, you need your eyes; if someone wishes to talk to you, you need your ears to hear; and if you want to tell someone about your faith, you need to be able to describe it. How can you be a witness in the dark?

Hugs,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

I can't really say...

...since, after all, as I look back, a lot of my "faith" in the past was more of an intellectual exercise, rather than real belief. I don't know, and, largely, it just doesn't feel that important to me at the moment. Much better to be a good person, or at least to try to figure out what that is and attempt to be one, I think. The rest, one way or another, can follow as it needs.

In the meantime, I'll keep my shrine to Iwakura Lain clean and in good repair, and my collection of Phillip K. Dick stories well-dusted. ^^;

I guess that doesn't really help, though. >.<

-Liz

-Liz

Successor to the LToC
Formerly known as "momonoimoto"

Your faith in what Dorothy? Heaven? Hell?

Live your life as you feel you should live it. What has faith got to do with it anyway? Have faith in yourself and the rest will just happen.

Huggles Dorothy
Angel

"Be Your-Self, So Easy to Say, So Hard to Live!"

"Be Your-Self, So Easy to Say, So Hard to Live!"

I believe in Good, not God

I stopped believing in God in my late teens and, like an ex-smoker, feel all the more self-righteous for it.

I really believe God was necessary in historic times to explain the unexplained, and that He is rather an irrelevance now. Heaven and hell only exists in our lifetimes, not beyond - and I'm lucky enough to live mainly in the former, but unfortunately all too many live in the latter.

Mankind will only advance when the Good is encouraged. Religion is one way of doing that, but it is not the only way. It does not have the monopoly on being kind to people.

When I was young, I'd have been frightened to express these thoughts so openly, as some zealots would wish me anything but brotherly love, whilst others would do the opposite, forgiving me for my unrecognised sin. Nowadays, I simply accept your right to have different religious views, just as you have a right to have different political views to me.

So my advice, Dorothy, is not to worry about your faith. Instead concentrate upon how you can make life better for others - how you can turn their hell into heaven. When you do that, your own happiness may follow.