The General and the Butterfly, Chapter 4

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Chapter Four

Living with Aides

The exceptionally good mood I was in after saying goodbye to Katie at the end of what I thought was an incredibly successful day at school begin to take some serious hits the moment I opened the front door, which I found to be unlocked. Unlike the good old days, before the General was the General, when it had just been him, Steve, Craig and little ‘ole me we didn’t need to worry about bumping into members of the entourage that hang around general officers like stray puppies and hungry cats. At present this mewing, simpering gaggle consisted of an aide-de-camp, which is French for boot licking lackey, an enlisted aide who ‘aided’ the General whenever he held a service related function at his quarters and a driver. Thus far I hadn’t met any of the current crop. This was about to change.

Since the aide-de-camp was habitually attached at the hip to the General, I suspected it was the enlisted aide who I heard rummaging about in the kitchen. After tossing my backpack onto a bench in the foyer, I made my way to the back of the house, hoping as I did so this one was a wee bit more switched on than the last one my father had picked. While Sergeant Timothy Kline had been a nice enough guy, he didn’t impress Craig or I was the sort of person you’d want providing covering you with fire in a firefight. Tiny Tim, a nickname Craig saddled him with, had far too much, ‘Yes Sir, General Sir. Right away, Sir,’ in him and not near enough ‘Hooah’ for either us.

This one, on the other hand, was something entirely different. Upon my entering the kitchen she continued inventorying the china until she reached a point where she could stop without losing track of her count. When she did, she turned sharply, drew herself up and introduced herself. “I am Sergeant Maria Burgos, the General’s enlisted aide.”

Both her snappy, staccato delivery and the look in her eye told me this was a woman no sane person wanted to mess with. Physically, she was not all that impressive, standing half a head shorter than me. It was her demeanor, a self assured expression and the way she filled out her ACUs that impressed me as being the kind of woman who could knit a tank out of steel wool. “I’m Rachel,” I replied doing my best to match Burgos’ confident, self-assured manner.

“Yes, I know,” she replied in an even tone that betrayed nothing.

Feeling a wee bit awkward, a sensation that was fast becoming my default response to moments like this, I blurted out the first thing I could think of. “Is there something I can help you with?”

“No. I have everything in hand,” she replied, again in a tone that was punctual without being curt.

‘I’ll bet you do,’ I thought to myself.

“I do have a message for you from the General,” she quickly added. “You will being dining out tonight. He directed me to inform you that you were to wear something appropriate.”

I didn’t bother asking Sergeant Burgos if she knew what the General had in mind. Fact was, I seriously doubted if he had any idea what was appropriate attire for his newly acquired teenaged daughter. Instead I asked the good sergeant what time I needed to be ready. “Eighteen hundred hours,” she replied. Since the General operated on Vince Lombardi time, I knew I needed to be ready to roll not later than 17:45 hours, which gave me a little less than two hours to change and get myself ready.

It goes without saying, (although I am going to say it anyhow just so you can all keep up with things), I was of two minds. Part of me wanted to have some fun at the General’s expense by dressing in something totally inappropriate, like my ‘Team Infidel’ Tee shirt and a pair of ratty jeans. To have done so, however, would not only have incurred his righteous wrath, it would have been an undeserved slap in the face. My father, after all, had gone out of his way to do all he could to help me though the ordeal I had brought on. I had little doubt he had already endured a great deal of grief, both overt and covert, because of what I was doing. And though he never even hinted at it, I owed him big time for all he had done and suffered as he did his damnedest to make my journey on the Genderland Express as painless as possible.

So I settled on a white shift dress with colorful flowers on it. Grams had insisted on buying it for me. “You’ll be needing something nice every so often,” she told me when she saw the expression on my face as she held it up to me in the store. “You can’t go about looking like a cross between a Tom boy and a member of a grunge band all the time.” She was right of course. I knew she was. Still, this was the first time I’d managed to muster up the chutzpah to wear it. ‘Well,’ I thought to myself as I pulled the dress out from the dark recesses of my closet where I’d hung it. ‘Here goes.’

It was only as I was cutting off the tags I’d never bothered removing before that it occurred to me there was more than one way to yank the General’s chain. With an evil grin on my face, I set about doing exactly the opposite of what I imagine he expected.

Hooah!

~

I stayed in my room when the General arrived home. When he stopped by and rapped on the door with his knuckles before asking if I would be ready soon, I didn’t open the door, calling out in the sweetest little girl voice I could manage that I was almost finished. Even when he came back by my door and informed me in the tone of voice meant to warn me his patience was wearing thin we needed to be going I told him I’d be down in a minute. In the past, such a response would have been akin to calling for fire on your own position. At the moment however, the General was treading lightly when it came to me, either because he was sympathetic to the way I thrashed about from time to time dealing with my new normal or, more likely than not, he was absolutely clueless as to how to deal with a daughter. Regardless, being the devious little toad I could be when I put my mind to it, I took full advantage of the kinder, gentler General in order to have some fun.

Only when I was absolutely ready, which was about thirty seconds before I imagined the General lost his temper, I slowly made my way down the stairs to where he was waiting. My deliberate pace was not due to any attempt on my part to make my grand entrance any more dramatic than I expected it would be. Rather, the two-inch heels I was wearing for the first time demanded I take my time least I tumble down the stairs.

Whatever canned lecture on the need to be punctual the General had been preparing to serve me was forgotten when he looked up and saw me. It takes a lot to unhinge a crusty old cur like him, and believe me, the effort I needed in putting myself together for this moment was, for me at least, a lot. Makeup, hair, dress, stockings and heels all blended together nicely to create an image I found myself having to admit looked pretty damned good. By the expression on the General’s face, he seemed to agree, for he forgot about the time as well as his wish to admonish me and instead, simply watched with mouth slightly agape as I approached him wondering, no doubt, if he should be pleased or appalled by what he was seeing.

With more confidence than I felt, I trooped up to the General, clasped my hands behind my back and puffed out my budding little boobies as far as I dare. “Well, do I pass muster, Daddy?” I asked sweetly.

If my cutesy little voice and use of the term ‘Daddy’ did register, the General didn’t show it. Instead, he simply stood there, scrambling to find something appropriate to say.

(Commercial Break)


Messing with makeup and hair – One hour.
Squirming into pantyhose – Ten minutes
Carefully walking down stairs in heels – Five minutes
Causing an airborne ranger to blush – Priceless
(Okay, back to the story)

When he didn’t say anything, I did the coy thing I’d seen girls at school pull on male teachers, dropping my chin a smidge and looking up at the General through lashes coated with mascara. “If you’d like, I can go back upstairs and change.”

As if awakening from a trance, the General blinked and gave his head a quick shake. “No, don’t,” he sputtered. “You’re a… What I mean is what you have on is a…”

“Fine?” I chirped.

“Yes.”

“Good, ‘cause I wasn’t sure if this would prove to be a little too dressy for a trip to Micky D’s.”

Finally realizing I was yanking his chain, the General grunted. “We need to be going,” he muttered brusquely.

Having been so caught up in my own little mind games, it wasn’t until that moment it dawn upon me the General was up to something. “Do we have reservations or something?” I asked calmly.

“Hmm, something like that,” he replied as he regarded me out of the corner of his eye while sporting a devious little smirk, the kind that causes the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end.

‘Oh shit.’

~

My efforts to wean any useful information out of the General during our drive into Old Town Alexandria was frustrated as he wrestled the initiative from me by asking how my first day at school had gone. Besides knowing full well the odds of finding out what he had up his sleeve were nil, I was eager to tell him about Katie, especially the way Mr. Halverson had embarrassed the poor girl. “I soooo wanted to crawl under my desk and hide when he was building up to his introduction. I was sure he was going to tell everyone about me,” I informed the General.

“Would it had been all that bad if he had?” the General countered.

“Well duh, Captain Obvious! What do you think?”

“I think you’re playing a dangerous game,” the General countered. “You know as well as I do people are going to find out about you sooner rather than later. When they do, I expect some are going to feel they’ve been lied to. While I expect most will understand why you didn’t tell them right off, those who don’t could very well turn on you in an effort to extract some revenge.”

One of the General’s most annoying habit was his knack for being right. And though I knew what he said needed to be said, I still felt miffed over his timing. Folding my arms tightly across my chest, I took to pouting, another useful girly expression I was still working to prefect. “Way to go, Dad. Nothing like raining on my parade."

He chuckled. “Hey, what are fathers for?”

~

The II Porto Ristorante in Old Town is a top notch Italian restaurant with tons of ambiance. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to enjoy it for very long as the General and I were led to a table already occupied by a young couple. I had no need to ask or even guess who they were. The high and tight buzz cut of the male component of the pair as well as the way he all but popped up out of his chair and stood at attention as if he’d just heard the opening strains of ‘Hail to the Chief’ when he saw us approaching told me he was the General’s new dog robber.

Aide de camps are not always selected for their smarts, at least from what I have observed. Rather, their pedigree is often determines their suitability. As best I could tell, the General’s criteria for selecting his last aide was;

One - He was a member of the West Point Protective Society, a derisive term often used by non-West Point officers and me when I felt like annoying the General and my older brother Steve, who Craig and I had taken to calling ‘The Captain’ due to the way he had lorded over us as we had been growing up.

Two - He was airborne ranger, complete with scrape marks on his knuckles from dragging them on the ground and a perchance for grunting hooah at the most inopportune times.

Three - He had managed to complete a tour in the Sandbox as a company commander without embarrassing himself or his battalion commander.

And four - He was neither a smart ass like Craig and I or a kiss ass like Steve.

It seemed brains and the ability to use them for purposes other than keeping his head from collapsing in on itself were a plus, but not mandatory.

As the senor officer present, the General began by introducing me. “Rachel, this is Captain Brandon Pepper, my aide. Captain Pepper, this is my daughter, Rachel.”

Having suspected during the drive into Old Town the General was up to something, I not only succeeded in dealing with the situation in a calm, nonchalant manner, I was able to use the opportunity to extract a bit of revenge for the way he’d set me up. Flashing a broad, toothy smile, I tilted my head to one side as I offered Captain Pepper my hand. “I am sooo pleased to meet you,” I cooed sweetly. “It’s always such a thrill to meet the people Daddy works with.” Naturally I ignored the dirty look the General gave me as Cee Pee, the nickname I quickly settled on for Captain Pepper turned to introduce his wife, a demure blond named Debbie who, I was quick to discover, was a native of Savannah, Georgia and damned proud of it.

As much as I hate the way the politically correct Gestapo enjoy purging the English language of some it its most colorful and useful terms, I will admit there are a few words and phrases I’d like to see added to that list. Chief amongst them is the phrase, ‘I’ve heard so much about you,’ one Debbie greeted me with as she placed her limp, dead fish hand in mine.

Now, before I go any further, please don’t go getting me wrong. Debbie Pepper was without doubt a dear, sweet lady, the kind who I could not help but imagine had been a cheerleader in high school, volunteered every Thursday afternoon at the local Red Cross, fed stray cats and went from collecting Barbies to Hummels. She was pretty, too.
Unfortunately, when she saw me dressed as I was and on my best behavior, despite knowing I was currently betwixt and between genders, she automatically assumed I would find what she found interesting and enjoyable just as exciting. As if!

Once the introductions were complete, our orders had been placed and menus collected, there followed a brief but very awkward silence as Cee Pee and Dee Pee took to nervously eyeing each other and the General in an effort to see who would take the lead in filling the void with appropriate and acceptable chit chat. I could only assume the General had made it clear to his new aide shop talk during occasions such as this was vorboten. It was a general rule the General lived by, no pun intended. Most military parents who were committed to maintaining an enjoyable domestic life apart from their official duties did their best to leave the day’s troubles and tribulations in the office when it came time to pull pitch and head for the barn. Being a single parent, the General was even more wed to this concept.

Adding to the stress both Captain Pepper and his wife were under was the appreciation they were being tested. Unlike most professions, military spouses are considered to be an important element of an officer’s overall suitability to be an officer. In addition to running the officer’s household and ensuring the officer’s children did nothing that would adversely reflect upon him and, by extension, the unit he is assigned, when forward deployed the officer’s spouse was expected to look after the welfare of their subordinates’ families. While a wife who does not measure up to the high standards some commanders place upon them seldom impairs an officer’s ability to close with and destroy the enemy by the use of fire, maneuver and shock effect, she could easily prove to be an embarrassment to her husband and sound the death knell of his career if she showed up at the annual military ball sporting tats of fire breathing dragons up and down her arm, pink spiky hair and a vocabulary that would make a trucker blush.

Then there was me, sweet, innocent little ‘ole me. At the moment I was enjoying the show, behaving myself as I surreptitiously watched Cee Pee squirm and Debbie glance from one person to the next while the General eyed them both as if he were studying a pair of lab rats frantically scurrying about a maze. When Debbie realized her husband, who like most airborne rangers possessed all the social graces of a socially awkward Neanderthal, wasn’t going to step up to the plate and take a swing at opening an acceptable line of discourse, she took the initiative.

I will give the woman credit for knowing some of the more common opening gambits needed to be avoid, questions like, ‘Rachel, what do you do for fun,’ or ‘Tell me all about yourself.’ To my surprise, she started by asking me if I enjoyed riding. Whether she was better informed than I had given her credit for or if she just happened to hit upon something I did enjoy didn’t matter. It allowed me to gracefully play the part the General expected me to in this little social experiment of his.

“Yes, I do, Mrs. Pepper,” I replied smoothly. “My grandmother in Wyoming owns several horses I ride every chance I get when I’m staying with her.”

“How lovely,” Debbie cooed, pleased with herself at having managed to save her husband and finding something we the girls had in common. “Do you compete?”

“I’ve done some barrel racing,” I replied, not realizing her idea of suitable forms of equestrian completion was poles apart from mine.

“Have you ever competed in hunter-jumper events?” she asked, betraying more about herself as she did so than I suspect she imagined.

Rather than responding with something more akin to what I ordinarily would have responded to such a question, I simply shook my head. “No ma’am.”

Upon hearing this, Debbie regaled me with a warm, home grown southern smile. “I’d wish you’d call me Debbie, Sweetie,” she declared. “Why, I expect we could almost be sisters.”

Instinctively I glanced over at the General out of the corner of my eye. When I saw him eyeing me with his Darth Vader glare, I once more set aside the first response was on the tip of my tongue and instead informed Debbie doing so was out of the question, though I did manage to sneak in a quick jab. “Oh, no ma’am, I couldn’t. Daddy would never stand for such familiarity or unladylike behavior from me when dealing with my elders.”

Having been blessed with a vivid imagination, I could almost feel the General’s invisible hands closing about my throat. The temptation to pretend I was gagging as Craig and I often did at times like this was dismissed. I expect I was already sailing precariously close to the wind as it was.

“I see your father is very much like mine,” Debbie continued while glancing over at the General and giving him a wink. ‘Oh! She’s good,’ I thought to myself. As it turned out, she was too good by half.

~

When the General said nothing after we left the restaurant and headed home, I knew I had nothing to worry about. Had he been displeased with my behavior he’d have laid into me the moment we were alone in the car. So I felt no trepidation when I asked it was that was bothering him.

At first he didn’t answer, which told me he was still mulling whatever was troubling him over in his mind. It was the look he gave me out of the corner of his eye while we were stopped at a red light that clued me in there was something he wasn’t quite ready to share with me, something, I suspected, I wasn’t going to be thrilled to hear. But before he got around to sharing his thoughts with me, my next opportunity to excel in a seemingly endless parade of challenges needed to be dealt with.

------------------

HW Coyle

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Comments

Too Short!

This is my favorite story of yours. Now I've got to wait another week for more! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Loved it as always! Glad you're going to finish it.

Very, very good......

D. Eden's picture

But God how I hate where it ended!

I am really enjoying this story and I can't wait to see more - especially after the multiple hints you just left. How is Debbie too good? What is bothering the General? What is this latest opportunity for Rachel to excel? And let us not forget about the good Sargeant and Katie......

Wow! So many things to ponder......

Dallas

D. Eden

Dum Vivimus, Vivamus

pox and murrain

That cliff hanger and how short it was makes me feel like a druggy needing her next fix


I'm a bibliophile, a nerd, a gamer, a MMA, and a girl

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too short

Teek's picture

That was way too short. I love your stories, and this was a great addition to this fine tale of yours. It was too short though, and the cliff hanger really pulls at me. Please post the next section soon.

Keep writing.
Keep smiling.

Keep Smiling, Keep Writing
Teek

Too short?

Too short? No, you've probably got enough on your plate to be going on with. Quality is more important than quantity.

Well enjoyed it girl.

Bevs.

bev_1.jpg

more please...

this has been a very good story, I love her sense of humor.
looking forward to more, thanks

Begs to be continued

Podracer's picture

I really hope more of this story surfaces eventually. It is high quality and humorous, and kept me at the screen devouring the words like cream cakes. No sign of it at Amazon or Lulu, as I would have happily paid to read the rest.

"Reach for the sun."

Awesome storyhope you can

Awesome storyhope you can finish it! It is a good read

Please continue this story.

Would you PLEASE continue this story everything about it just rings home to me.
Thanks Patti

I read it again

Podracer's picture

I don't know, maybe hoping the momentum would miraculously generate another chapter somehow?

"Reach for the sun."

I did the same thing

I was wandering through BCTS looking for something to read and found this that I had read before. I started it thinking it was complete. What a surprise I got when I finished chapter 4. It's not nice to leave a cliff hanger hanging out for five years.

I'm guessing that RL has been interferring with your writing. I hope you can get it resolved so you can get back to writing. We all miss it. Thanks for what you have done and shared with the rest of us.

Much Love,

Valerie R