Lanterns on Lake Pontchartrain
An Acadiana Transgender Story

-3-
A Proposal and Getting Promoted

I thought about what Jasmine told me for a few days before I could finally muster up the courage to talk to my manager about getting Sunflower Food Store to sponsor me. The manager of my store happened to be a middle age creole woman by the very southern name April May Fair. She was small, but she was a firecracker. She was the kind of woman who would scold the Devil himself if he dared to walk across her freshly mopped floor with dirty hove prints . No scratch that, she would not only tell the Devil off, she would then reach up and take him by the ear and twist the ear around. And once she had him by the ear she would drag him into the nearest corner and then make him put his nose in the corner. She was the type of woman who prayed the Holy Rosary in broken French with bits of Latin added in for flare and then wrestled alligators out in the swamp for fun.

And as I climbed the wooden steps that lead to her office, I started to question my own sanity. I was thirty minutes early for one of those rare seven o' clock shifts. And since I was early, and the store was still closed, I'd asked if I could talk to her. Her answer had been a grunt followed by being told to come up to her office. That had been just five minutes ago. I further questioned my sanity as I knocked upon the wooden door.

“Come in!” A voice that would have shook the very core of the earth and made the legions of Hell tremble and squat in their pants bellowed from the other side of the door. I took a deep breath and breathed a quick prayer to Lord God. Whom I'm sure was looking on amusement as I pushed in the brass door handle and stepped into the office. I was greeted by Mrs. Fair, standing in the middle of the office. The office smelled of burned coffee grinds and paint. Anyway, her tiny black eyes were peering directly at me. Her arms were folded across her chest and it seemed the very fires of Hell dance upon the surface of her eyes.

“So Mr. Fisherman. What can I do for this fine morning? I would offer you to take a seat but you're due to be on the clock soon. So let's just cut to chase shall we? After all, there is an old saying that goes like this 'Time is money' and neither of us have the time nor the money to pissing away.” She said as she unfolded her arms and stepped behind her desk.

“Mrs. fair. I would like the store to sponsor me for Blue Bayou's first annual Womanless beauty pageant. Since other local businesses are sponsoring their girly looking employees and Kay's are second biggest rival after Wal-Mart has entered one of their employees I think it's only right that we do the same. Plus all money raised from the event goes to support our local hospital. And we all know they need any and all help they can get.” I had to spit out those words before my courage failed me.

And just like that I thought I would soon find myself out of work and lined up with the others in the unemployment office. And so I froze and awaited with baited breath for the fearsome tirade that I was sure was about to be poured down upon my head. Instead, Mrs. Fair smiled. It was a creepy smile, but a smile nonetheless. She was really smiling, and that fact alone scared the pants right off of me. I've only seen her smile once before and that was when she hired me some years ago.

“Okay.” She said, still smiling. I really wished at this point she would stop smiling. “I think that's a capital idea! And I'm sure we can manage that. I mean, don't take any offense to this, but hell Casper you look like a girl most days. And you even talk like a girl, and you got all that damn hair on your head too. Hell, I get dozens of people every day wanting to know who that wonderful young lady is that I have working the produce counter.” She said smiling.

“Hey, Casper.. would you mind taking your ponytail holder out of your hair?” Mrs. Fair asked.

I blinked and blinked again. Now, most of the time I chose to wear my hair in a low, manly ponytail or I wore it tucked under my hat. The dress code at Sunflower was not really strict in the truest sense of the word. But it was kind of frowned upon for the stock clerks to have their hair long enough to touch the collar of their shirts. And my hair at this point reached down to the middle of my back. And in order to keep down the barbs from some of the older co-workers and Mrs. April's Shift Leader. A fat, pot belly, balding man who smoked like a freight train by the name of Tim Peoples, I tended to keep my hair in a braided ponytail and have it tucked under my shirt.

“Sure.” I blinked as I reached up and removed the black hairband. After removing the band, a cascade of raven colored hair spilled down around my shoulders. Mrs. April took a few steps back and took a deep breath and finally after a few tense moments of silence said.

“Damn you have some long ass hair.” She said, sighing. “Well on the bright side you won't need a wig, your hair longer than most of the cashiers here. And looks a lot better too.” She added as she settled down into her office chair. She then folded her arms behind her head and peered up at the naked light bulb that hung down from a bundle of naked wires just above her head. She closed her eyes and took another deep breath.

“Something inside me is telling me that this is going to blow up right in my face. But also we need to do something because right now with Kay's entering one of their employees into the pageant were pinned. And I'm sure nobody else in this store is brave, no scratch that, foolish enough to volunteer. So I'm going to go ahead and give this crazy idea of yours my stamp of approval. Just promise me one thing, Casper Edward Fisherman.” She opened her eyes and peered directly at me, it was like I was looking into the maw of Hell.

“Yes ma'am?” I said well, confused. I felt like I was walking across thin ice. And any sudden misstep would send me crashing the thin ice and into the ice cold water below.

“Promise me this.” She paused as if chewing over the words in her head. “Promise me you'll try to have fun. And before you ask, no, I was not born yesterday. I do however feel there is something ticking or kicking that head of yours. I just want you to know that Sunflower Food Store is a family owned and operated Grocery store, there is also a chain there around fifteen or so Sunflower's scattered around this region. Maybe more since the son took over and he wants to expand as fast as possible. We're even edging into Mississippi and Texas a little. Anyway, the owners are, well they understand the law, they have a law team on their side, and they know how to skirt the law. Anyway, as long as I'm here you will have a job.” Mrs. April said, taking a deep breath.

Now, with that matter out of the way, I have some 'Business' I need to talk to you about, first, Earl Frost, the guy that is just above you. Today was his last day, he is now old enough to draw his full social check, and he's been with us long enough to get his pension. He starts his retirement today at twelve noon. So that leaves his position open. And since you've been with us for a while and since you've seemed to have a handle on produce. I'm going to promote you to his spot. Starting today at twelve noon when he clocks out, and collects his last check, your new title would be 'Lead Produce Clerk',” April paused.

“This would make you the second in command over that area of the store. Meaning you will now have to work Monday, Wednesday and Friday, the three days of the week get shipments in. As you would be expected to help stock the department during truck days. Your time on those days will be fixed as they have been at five o' clock in the morning till around three o' clock. With those other two days being five till one or two. I doubt our current head will stay on much longer so I'll have you enter 'training mode' meaning you will be learning how to order, how to send an order, how to check the invoices, how to request credit and such.” April paused.

“I understand that a lot on your shoulders. And your pay will of course reflect that. Your first duty though will be to train the guy who is taking over your spot. He does not have the education you have, he did not follow the normal chain. He's fresh from the front and green as green can be. So take your time and explain things to him the best you can. He's a good kid, he working to support his mom and kid sister. A bit of a slow learner but in time he will develop, hopefully.” April paused again.

“Second thing you'll need to learn. Is that the 'Lead Produce Clerk' does a lot of cutting. So we’re knee to teach you some knife skills. You will help the head make the fresh mixed berry bowls we sell in the cut fruit section, you will also make fresh fruit cups, you will craft fruit baskets and like I said you'll also be learning how to order and checking things off the produce invoice. Again this is a good bit of work, so again naturally I'm going to increase you. Right now I can promise you a fifty cent raise for taking the promotion. And once you've started mastering some of the skills. I'll give you another fifty cents here and there. In the end, you'll max out making around nineteen to twenty dollars an hour if you stick with it. And like I said, you're next in line to run that department. Once you get to that level you'll be just above a shift leader. You'll be making orders, writing out a schedule, booking promotions. So yes, stick with it.” April finally finished.

I nodded my head. All of this was honesty beyond me.

And with that I decided to march toward the time clock, I clocked in, took a deep breath and prayed a quick prayer. And with that I started another day in retail hell. Like the old saying goes. It was 'Another day, another dollar' five hours in, I took my break and once more brought some half priced deli food. On the menu today was fried fish, I think it was catfish, tasted like catfish but the texture remind of cod. And it tasted bitter. And for sides we had pieces of fried out okra and a dinner roll that could used as a paving stone or a handy projection if need be. It was so hard, gave up eating it after taking one bite.

After trying to eat something, I decided now would be the perfect time to call cousin Jasmine and give her the news. I took a deep breath and dialed her number. After the third ring Jasmine finally picked up and I took a deep breath to find my voice and in a very airy tone of voice I said.

“Good afternoon cousin Jasmine.” I said as soon as I heard her come on the other end.

“This better be good.” Jasmine said, taking a deep breath. “Because I just stepped out of a high stakes meeting. I shit you not, you better be in the got damn E.R or something.”

I blinked and blinked again.

“I volunteered for the pageant.” I said swallowing hard. “I just wanted to tell you.” I said sweat dropping a little. I closed my eyes and waited for Jasmine to blow right up on me. Instead she just heaved a heavy sigh and a few seconds later I heard her yell something something over her shoulders. It sounded like Japanese? When did she learn Japanese?

“Okay! Good, I just told the client that little kid sister needed to talk to me about something. Okay I have fifteen minutes before I need to get back into that office and close a high stakes deal that could millions for my company, a nice promotion from junior partner to senior for me, a nice bonus that amounts to around a hundred thousand dollars for my troubles. So, you volunteered? Good! Great! Do you have a gown picked out?” Jasmine asked.

“No. I was going to go gown shopping at the local charity shops this afternoon when I get off.” I said swallowing hard.

“First off, my little sister is not going to go into her first beauty pageant wearing a second hand prom grown or something some little slut has shagged in on her prom night. Nor is she going to wear something that smells like moth balls and swamp water. That total bullshit. Okay if I remember correctly there is this place in town that sells high end gowns. I think it's called 'Crown to Heel' their stuff is really up there. They even have a fancy salon, a photo shoot area and a waxing room. So boom full coverage.” Jasmine seemed to spitting out these words.

“Yes, I know that place, it located right across city hall.” I said. “I paused, But Jasmine I don't think I can afford a gown from that place?”

“What your Paypal?” Jasmine cut me off with a direct question.

“I don't have..” My voice failed.

“Do you any digital banking at all?” Jasmine asked again.

“No ma'am.”

“ISABELLA.” Jasmine said taking a deep breath. “Okay listen! I'm almost out of time. Does that grocery store you work at have a Western union?” Jasmine asked, I could tell by the tone of voice she was in a hurry.

“Yes, and if you use one of the stores in our chain, say another Sunflower you can wire money to an employee and by some kind of deal our store has, they will waver the fee.” I said blushing.

“Okay! I'll wire you some money as soon as this meeting is over. Text me when you get it, and Belle, not to sound bitchy or anything, cause I love you, just text me before you decided you want to call me say like on a weekday between the hours of seven and four. Please? Anyway, I love you, and hugs and kisses.” And with that she hug up.

“Hugs and kisses too you too..” I said taking a deep breath. “What have I gotten myself into.” I said as I finished nibbling on the cold piece of fried fish. “Jesus, should have gone to seminary right after high school like Father Andrew wanted me too.” I muttered as I sank deeply into my chair.

I quickly pushed those thoughts out of my head though. I knew I would have an terrible priest. And the church was already filled to the gills with terrible priest. There was no need to overburden the world with yet another one. Sighing, I wrapped the remains of my lunch in it's greased stained paper bag and tossed the bag into the nearby trashcan and stood up and marched toward the time clock. Four more hours remained.

Halfway through the second half of my shift. My phone buzzed. Now, were not allowed to check our phones on the sells floor. So I decided to use the bathroom, so I could see why my phone was buzzing. Getting caught checking your phone on the sales floor was grounds for a scolding at least. Anyway, it seemed the buzzing was caused by my cousin, who had sent me a text.

The text read as follows. 'Hey Belle, wired 1,200 dollars from the Western Union here in town to you. Check before you leave work kay? Text me if it's there. Oh! And call me too! This is not free money girl, you gotta earn this money. I gotta job for you! Call me later tonight and I'll tell you all about it.'

I peered down at the text and then it dawned on me, I had no idea what my cousin did. Last I heard she was working with some big time publishing company out of Baton Rouge. I had little time to think about this as a few seconds later my phone started to buzz again. Once more I checked it to see my dear cousin Jasmine had sent me another text.

'Oh, and the money is for Casper. I don't think you're ready to start using 'Belle' as a name. But take my advice. Use some of your next check, to buy some clothes. And a nice set of underwear. Something that looks good. Don't show up for this job looking like a street walked from New Orleans or a reject from the French Quarter. Tell you more this evening after you get off. Hugs and Kisses.'

After I read that text, I powered down my phone and took a deep breath. I think I took a leak, oddly enough I found myself sitting down to pee, it kind of felt right I guess. Then I washed my hands, and made a big show of drying them off. I forgot to flush though, well I did not want to flush, I felt like I needed to leave some proof behind that I was in the bathroom taking care of some personal business. Instead of you know, looking at my phone. I mean I'm an honest employee right?

To be continued.