Trapped by the police; chased by a raging maniac (or something); trekking through deep, eerie woods on a moon lit night, Jordan continues to investigate...

The Mystery of
The Missing MacGuffin
A Jordan Hailey Story
By Jan S
Yet More Chapters

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17: Rising Action

10:45. Bright blue light flooded the car, then bright red, white, then darkness. Then did it again.

The Case of the Missing MacGuffin was coming to a disastrous end.

No!

It wasn't the time for self-recrimination, not for doubts. It wasn't the time to think about the time I'd wasted. It wasn't the time to give up!

It was the time to plan, the time for action.

"Don't say anything, Andy. I'll do the talking."

He shrugged. "Hey, we haven't done nothin'. No worries." Then he laughed.

I didn't laugh. I had done nothing to get chased ten blocks this morning.

I had done nothing to get followed through town and through the mall.

Blair had done nothing to get hauled in by the cops and questioned.

I stayed cool.

The loudspeaker repeated, "Get out of the car! Now!"

They were going to ask questions. They were going to find out who I was. They were going to call my parents. Pictures would be in the papers. In a sundress. With pink hair!!

I looked out the back window. A spotlight came on to blind me.

One cop was at Andy's door; he held a flashlight by his face and shined it into the car; he kept one hand on the butt of his gun. "Leave the keys in the ignition! Keep you hands where I can see them! Out - slowly!"

Andy stepped out of the car and held his hands above his shoulders. "What's the problem, Officers?"

The cop yelled, "Shut up, and get your hands on the hood."

The policeman still on the loud speakers said, "Christ. He's shooting us the bird, Chuck."

I jumped out of the car and started to run to Andy's side. I yelled, "No! His hand is hurt! He has to hold it like that!! No!"

"Stop! Stand where you are! Put your hands on the hood. Stay on the other side of the vehicle."

I couldn't do all of those things at once but I stopped at the front of the car. "But what do you want with us? We haven't done anything!"

"I said 'shut up'!"

The policeman from the car behind came forward, also with his light shining into our eyes so we couldn't look straight at him. His hand was also on his holstered pistol.

The first cop kicked Andy's feet apart and away from the car so his weight was on his hands, and he was off balance.

"Can't you see his hand is hurt? Don't make him do that."

"Get back to the other side of the damn car!"

The cop patted Andy's back, his arms and chest, his pockets, and his legs, including inside of his thighs, all the way down to his shoes.

He walked around the car to my side. He was going to frisk me! He would feel my breasts and know they are fake. He was going to feel between my legs!

He grabbed my shoulder and shoved me to the passenger side. "I told you to put you hands on the hood. Do It Now."

I did. He kicked my feet back the way he had Andy's. Now the search! The end!

Leaning forward made my dress fall away from my body. He pointed his light down the front of my dress and held it there. Then he pulled my dress back, tight against my stomach. He shined the light down my back.

"He didn't tell me one of them was a girl," he said to the other cop almost laughing.

"You got lucky. I get to do it next time."

"Shut up, Kyle. She'll report us."

"No one will believe her. Get the stuff."

The second cop took the keys from the car and opened the trunk. The first one kept a watch on Andy and me.

The officer at the back of the car said, "Nothing back here, Chuck,"

"Fucking what! Look in the boxes."

"None here."

The first cop went to the back of the car. "Shit - that jerk told me they always had some after games. He's supposed to be the big supplier and might be other stuff here too."

"So, what now?"

"Take out the spare tire. If it ain't there, we take out the back seat."

I mouthed, "What are they looking for," to Andy.

He shrugged his shoulders. "It's a good thing we got rid of that bottle last night."

"Ssshhh!!"

The coaches had come out of the locker room and watched from way across the parking lot. A tow truck was parked in the middle of the lot facing us, and someone stood by the door talking to the driver as they leered. Every car on the boulevard slowed down to stare at us.

Andy started doing one handed pushups against the hood and smiled at me.

"Cut it out, Andy," I growled.

One of the cops yelled, "Shut Up, and Stand Still! Let's tie 'em up, Chuck."

Their flashlights weren't by their heads now, and I could see that their faces were young, and that their badges were tilted squares, not stars. That meant they had less than two years on the police force.

One cop wrapped an arm across my chest and stood me upright. He pulled an arm behind my back and high between my shoulder blades and then pulled the other arm back and crossed my wrists. He wrapped a strap around them and pulled it tight. He kept one hand under my arm pit, wiggling his fingers, as he guided me towards the street, and pushed me down so I was sitting on the edge of the curb with my legs in the gutter. The other cop handcuffed Andy and sat him on the curb ten feet from me.

I tried to fold my legs under my dress, but I was afraid I'd slip off the curb and fall over. Every time I moved the cuffs got tighter. The people in the cars kept slowing down to stare. All I could do to block their view was keep my legs tightly closed and my knees under my chin.

"Let's get the damn seat out."

"I got a half a pint of Jim Beam under my seat if we need it."

"We better find something, now we tied 'em up."

They must have called for reinforcements because I could hear a siren coming closer.

"Hot shit! Look. There's a duffle bag in the front seat, and it's full of bottles. This is it."

"Hell. That's just her purse. It's him we're searching."

Kepperman's pills were still in one of the side pockets! "That's private! Don't open it!"

"Oh, you don't mind. Or we do it at the station."

"I can feel the bottles in it. We don't need her permission. And it's on school property."

"That's just hair stuff! Leave it alone!"

A voice came form the parking lot. "Officers, can I talk to you."

Mr. Friend! Thank God! He would tell these two cops that Andy and I didn't need to be treated like this!

I couldn't turn around to see the parking lot, and I couldn't tell what they were saying, but I could tell they were having a heated conversation behind Andy's car.

"Nothing!" I heard Mr. Friend shout. He was really giving it to those jerks, but good!

The new police car pulled to a stop right in front of me. I recognized Officer Benwell's voice, and it sounded angry. "You two again. I've about had it with you."

I said, "We didn't do anything! Honest!"

Mr. Benwell glared at me and then kept walking towards the other policemen.

Mr. Friend said, "Hello, Lloyd. You here to supervise?"

One of the other cops said, "Benwell, we're doing duty for the lieutenant. Special detail. School report."

"This bag is full of booze, Benwell."

I said, "No, it's not! That's just shampoo."

"Shut up, girlie."

Officer Benwell said, "You two have warrants? What's your probable cause to open her bag?"

"School property -- sanctioned search. Hell, Lloyd, you know it's gotta be in there for her to panic like that."

"I heard that when you stopped this car, you didn't have a school administrator there. Did you, boys?"

"He was over in the buildings. They were leaving. Got one here now though."

I said, "Stop them, Mr. Friend. Don't let them open my bag."

Mr. Friend said, "I don't know. Your report was about the car and driver, not the bag."

"Hell's bells," the cop named Kyle said. "We can tell it's full of bottles. It's illegal for her to have liquor, and double illegal to have it at school. That's probable cause."

Mr. Friend said, "I am sorry, Jordan, but if you and Andy do have alcohol in there on school property, -- and there are a lot of bottles in there, it's obvious -- and I stop them, I wouldn't be doing my job. I think I have to let them look inside. I don't really have a choice at this point."

I looked backwards just well enough to see the young cop dump my bag out on to the car seat.

"Looks like hair stuff to me. Smells awful, but it ain't likely drinkable," Benwell said. "You two started a search without cause or school supervision. You tied them up before an arrest when they weren't giving you trouble. Then you left them right on the street against policy. Head out to the highway. I'll try to keep 'em from filling a complaint on your asses."

One of the rookie cops said, "And lookie here. Some little pink pills! I just wonder what these are." Victory filled his voice.

I yelled, "Those aren't even mine!"

"She's sure scared about them, huh. Going to check them on the computer."

"Let me see those!" Mr. Friend said. "Where did you get these, Hailey? Are these Andy's?"

"No! I found them. I don't know whose they are. Really! Honest!"

Officer Benwell was silent.

I put my head down on my knees and closed my eyes. I didn't know what those things were, but I knew I probably shouldn't have them and that they could use them to take me in.

Mr. Friend said, "Well. This really wasn't on your original report. I don't know if we need to pursue this."

"The hell. Doesn't matter if it's on the report. It was found on the search, in plain sight. I'm looking on the computer."

"But - uhh - it wasn't what you were looking for," Mr. Friend said, "I don't think we need to go into it.

Mr. Benwell said, "Let me look at that. Either of you boys remember seeing pills like this on the bulletins? I know you keep up with those like you're supposed."

Andy started laughing very loudly. He yelled, "Hailey, you lied to me!"

He had managed to turn around and face the parking lot. I gapped at him.

"Those are her birth control pills! She told me she didn't take them!"

"They aren't mine! I mean it! They aren't!"

Andy laughed even louder.

Mr. Friend grabbed the pills. "OK. OK, I think we have embarrassed Hailey enough. You don't really have anything."

From ten feet I could see Andy rolling his tongue around inside his cheeks and across his lips. When he saw me looking at him, he grinned and wiggled his eye brows.

One cop said, "OK, what are the pills, girl?"

"I don't know! They are someone else's. Maybe allergy pills?"

Benwell said, "You've got nothing. Get out of here, and I'll try to keep these two from suing you.

Andy said, "Mr. Benwell, that one was shining his light down the front of Hailey's dress too."

"I was looking for weapons, Lloyd. That's all."

The other young cop said, "We were told it was a sure-fire big bust!"

"Bust?" Benwell said and snorted "You don't want to be talking about busts after what Andy just said."

"We were told it would be more than just a bottle of whiskey," the second rookie said.

Benwell shook his head. "Kyle, go watch the shopping mall empty out. Chuck, go sit on Streke Road and make sure there's no drag races tonight."

"You ain't a sergeant, Lloyd."

"You two want to call the station and ask if that's an idea, or you want me to? Stadium's empty; your duty for the Lieutenant's done.

Mr. Friend escorted the two rookies to their cruisers and off of the school grounds. Mr. Benwell took the straps they used for hand cuffs off my wrists, and pain flooded my hands. I cried, "Get them off Andy! His hand is already hurt!"

"OK. I will, I will. They didn't do those cuffs right either. You keep rubbing your hands and moving your fingers. And hang on to that strap as a souvenir of something you don't want to ever happen again."

I could see Andy wince and grit his teeth when his strap was loose.

"Is it OK, Andy?" I said.

"It hurts like holy hell, Hail," he said, but he had that big grin again. He put his good arm around my shoulders and kissed the top of my head.

I let him do that and leaned my head onto his chest. We had to keep up appearances in front of the cop, right?

"We should show it to a doctor," I said as I rubbed his injured hand.

"It will be OK. I just need a kiss."

I rolled my eyes, but I kissed his bandaged hand to keep the masquerade up for Officer Benwell.

Andy said, "That's not the kiss I meant," and tried to kiss my lips.

I turned my head and slapped his shoulder, but didn't try to get away. Officer Benwell laughed at us.

The second of the rookie's cars peeled out onto the boulevard, and Mr. Friend came back. "No PDAs, you two."

Andy said, "An arm on a shoulder isn't a PDA, is it, sir?"

Still, I pulled away from Andy, but he wouldn't let go of my hand.

The tow truck that had been sitting in the center of the parking lot pulled around our car and onto the road. That Mac guy who had given us a ride last night was driving, and he held his hand up in a pretend wave as he went past without looking at us.

Mr. Friend said, "So what was all that about? What got them on your case?"

"Nothing, sir. Really."

Officer Benwell said, "Those two got a report someone was carrying booze for the team, Arnie. They got the wrong car."

"Was it the wrong car, Andy?"

"My trunk's empty. I don't ever have anything in my car."

Benwell eyed Andy. He knew there was liquor in Andy's car sometimes, because of last night.

Benwell said, "Don't know why they were working this alone anyway."

"Well, that's probably because all the senior officers gripe about doing this job, Lloyd. So, you weren't planning to get drunk again tonight, huh, Andy?"

Andy started then began, "Mr. Friend! I don't. . .", but he remembered that Mr. Benwell knew about last night and said, "Not very often. Really! I've got life plans, Mr. Friend. You know that."

"I know. Well, you got real lucky you didn't have anything for tonight yet. And there wasn't anything else in the car, humm."

I said, "No! Nothing."

"And those pills aren't yours, Andy?"

"No, sir. I didn't know anything about them."

Mr. Friend sighed and pinched his nose. "I suppose you two are going to the park and boast about your big adventure now. You should go home."

Andy said, "We need to talk to people. They will have heard about this, and we need to stop the rumors before they grow. Don't you think so?"

"Oh, right. That's a point. So you will be going to the park then."

I said, "If Mr. Benwell lets us."

"I can't say you can't. I don't see you've done anything wrong tonight, but do stay out of it from now on."

Mr. Friend said, "What else are they into, Lloyd?"

"A lot a' trouble."

I said, "It just hasn't been a good day, Mr. Friend. We aren't doing anything wrong. I'll see you Monday morning then?"

"What? What for?"

"Ms. Wiggin's class?"

"Oh, that honors class. Yeah, we will see all about that next week."

The cop said, "The next time you see me, it will be 'cus I want to see you! All right?"

We nodded a lot and backed away from them. Then we got out of there as fast as we could while driving very slowly.

I put my head on my knees and sighed. "Oh, God! Oh, God!"

Andy rubbed my back and said, "It's all over now, Jor. It's done."

"Andy how could you act like that?"

"Like what?"

"Push ups - screwing around. They were nuts; you could have pissed them off more."

"I wouldn't have gone that far. Really. It was like watching the defense screw up from the sidelines; I can't do anything about it. I get silly, huh? I wasn't that bad."

"Maybe not, but they might have blown up."

"I'm sorry, Hails. I didn't mean to scare you more."

I was still bent over and was sitting on most of the things from my purse. I started to pull them out and said, "Huh? It's not that. I guess you weren't terrible. And thinking of the birth control pills was great, except now Officer Benwell thinks I'm a slut."

"Better than thinking you’re a druggie."

"Yeah. Friend thinks you're an alkie. Do you drink that much?"

"Last night was as much as I ever drink, and not very often. Just to not be too weird around the team. He hasn't told anyone though, or the coaches would have talked to me."

"Ummm. Maybe counselors have special rules. But…" I thought about Mr. Friend. "He stopped the cops from looking up those pills, and he knows I'm not taking birth control pills."

"Well, sometimes boys do."

I sighed. "Yeah. He thinks I'm trans. Probably thought I was gay before."

"Don't worry, you aren't the first at school, Jord."

"And he's not the first to think that, is he? Does he know about you?"

"Yep. Tried to tell me it was a real bad idea one time, without actually saying that." Andy was smiling about the whole thing. That smile could be annoying as hell, and it could be great to see and, sometimes, it was both at once.

I started thinking about the MacGuffin, and why we had been set up with those cops, those particular cops.

"That wasn't mistaken identity, Andy. They said it was someone from the school."

"No. There were lots of people; dads, local booster types; walking around the sidelines tonight, Jordie. Lots of them could have told those cops anything. None of the real coaches would have done that without giving me "the speech" first."

"Do you know Kipperman? Was he there?"

"Yeah. - And yeah, he was."

Andy put his hand on my back and started playing with the string on my dress.

"Keep your hands on the wheel, Andy. They were looking for something more than just a bottle, you know."

He moved his hand. "I know, and you are just no fun at all, and there's a cop about half a block behind us."

I jerked my head around and then jerked it back. "Shiiii! Is he following us? Shhhh!"

Andy made an overly careful U-turn, and I quickly peeked out the back to see the cruiser turn around too. We went into a sub-division of huge houses on small lots. The turns were too close together for us to see if the cop was following. Andy sped up on a very short block, then turned at three intersections in a row.

Instead of another major street we came out on a narrow road that ran beside a green belt. There was no sign of the cop behind us, but when we reached an intersection there was a patrol car there too.

"Andy, get to a store somewhere - a gas station. Before he turns on his siren."

"We're at the park - the back side. If he stops, he'll know there are lots of people watching from the trees"

Andy drove up a dirt road and parked near some other cars and as close to the trees as possible. The cop car pulled in too and stopped right behind us, but no one got out of it.

Andy said, "Just act normal. Don't even look at him."

As soon as we were out of the car, I heard Mr. Benwell call, "Andy. Jordan. Come over here."

I don't know if I felt more relieved or stupid. I know I giggled and Andy laughed.

When we got to the car window, he said, "I got some things to say that I didn't think you'd want that school guy to hear. First, Andy, quit drinking. I didn't know you did that enough for the school to know about it, or I wouldn't of helped you last night. Got that? Never again. Second, don't stay in this park long. Don't hang around looking for trouble."

Andy said, "I haven't ever drank very much or very often, sir. Not like last night before and won't again. You know my father would freak. I don't know where Mr. Friend got that idea, and I have to be home by midnight to take a pill for my hand, so we won't be long."

"'K. Whatever. Now I got to talk to Jordan. Go over there."

Andy walked to the trees and Mr. Benwell said, "I told you to keep Andy out of trouble. You sure have done a crappy job of it."

"Sorry."

He shook his head. "Yeah, I know. So that school guy, Friend, knows you?"

I nodded.

"You go home when Andy does. And I guess you aren't gonna want to make a complaint against those two idiots, are you?"

I shook my head. I was as nervous talking to him as I'd been talking to those other two cops, but I wasn't scared of him, more embarrassed at being scolded.

"Gimme those pills. I don't think you need them for birth control, and if I find out they're what I think they are, I'm gonna have to tell your folks. I know they're good people and don't need you messing up your body and life."

"They weren't in the car. Honest. I think Mr. Friend kept them. And I really don't know what they are, Mr. Benwell. I promise. I just found them. I don't take them. Really. They might be aspirin."

"Aspirin don't have pictures of some sort of snake or something on them, Jordan. I'm gonna keep looking until I find out what it is."

"But I really don't know."

"How did you get them?"

What would a cop think of my keeping the pills? They had definitely been lost behind the seat, but I did know it was Kipperman's truck. And I wasn't sure enough about Kipperman to want to bring the cops in yet. That's not done until everything is certain. I couldn't tell Mr. Benwell the whole story. "I just found them lying around. I was going to look them up. I guess that was dumb. But no way was I ever going to take them."

The officer just stared at me. Finally I said, "Can I ask you something, sir? Has any thing at all happened with the MacGuffin since this morning?"

"Nope. It hardly got mentioned in the squad meeting. And that's another thing -- you leave that alone too. There were two kids we were supposed to watch for, but they seem to have disappeared. You don't know anything about them do you?

I shook my head. "I'm not sure who you mean."

"Stay in the park just long enough to let the kids know you ain't in jail, then leave, Jordan. And forget about the MacGuffin.

"Maggie wants to know when you're coming for those bikes."

"If I can find a ride, I'll do it tomorrow. Is that OK? If I can't I’ll call the diner; it's Big D's, right? Your daughter's clothes are in my mother's car. I'll take them to the diner too. All right?"

"I'm supposed to be working. I'd say 'see you around', but I hope I don't."

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18: To a Plateau

I had never been in The Forest of Arden before.

People from all the high schools and even some from the university in the next suburb gathered here at night, and everyone told their parents that they had never heard of the place.

Of course, I'd looked around during the day and, once in eighth grade, Blair and I snuck out at eleven and rode bikes to the park. We only dared to peer into the trees from across the pond though, and that was as close as I'd ever come to The Woods, because it had to be night to be The Woods that everyone talked about.

Andy was waiting at the start of the trail to the clearing. He was already flanked by numbers 87 and 43, the two football players who had chased me away from him last night. They seemed to think they were his body guards, or maybe they just thought they would get the ball more by hanging onto him.

I would have been excited, or maybe anxious, about finally going into the woods, but I was too embarrassed about being scared in the car. I shrugged my shoulders and stuck my tongue out an inch as I walked up. That got me one of those Andy smiles.

Andy put his arm across my shoulder right away and whispered, "Hey, I was worried too."

Number 87 said, "You're that Hailey kid's cousin, huh? Condolences."

"Why's that so bad if I am?"

"Uh - Geek?"

"Knock it off, Blaine," Andy said.

Number 43 piped in with, "And he's got a crush on Andy too."

"Oh! Does he, Andy?" I was laughing. I already knew the way these guys' minds worked, and it didn't bother me, much.

"Alright, Shut Up," Andy said.

The two football players laughed. "Andy's always getting pissed about gay jokes. He's got a gay uncle or something. We're just kidding around, Andy."

"He's OK - funny and smart and always willing to help out and stuff. Those are good things. Don't knock 'em just because you two assholes are the opposite. He's also an athlete. You wish you were as fast and quick as he is, and so does Coach."

"Woo. He's got it bad for you, Hailey - building up your cousin. So you both get called Hailey, huh. I heard how your parents twisted your names up. Bet that gets screwed up all the time?"

"We're not seen together much, so not really."

"I can see why you wouldn't want to be seen with him." Another laugh which I ignored and pushed Andy up the trail.

Ahead of us there were weird lights shining in all directions, and I asked what they were.

43 said, "Haven't you been here lately, huh? There's a burn-ban, 'cause of no rain all summer. People pile flashlights into the fire ring and grills - not that we'd have a fire in August if we could - but since they say 'no'."

A loud group groan came from the clearing, and then came a shout. "I FUCKING AM TOO!!"

"Knock It The Hell Off, Pike! JUST GO AWAY!"

The four of us stopped on the path. 87 said, "Sounds like Pike still has a problem with you, Andy."

"Damn Bitch! Saying She Beat Me Up! I'm Gonna Rip Her!"

"Jojo, Get him out of HERE! PLEASE!" That was Tracy's voice.

Blair came trotting up the path. She was panting and grabbed me and said, "Jordan, don't go in there, or you, Andy. Wait 'til he leaves. He's shit crazy."

Andy said, "I'll go talk him down. Hails, wait here a minute."

"No. I'll talk to him. I'll tell him I didn't say anything about the fight to anyone."

Blair said, "He won't care, stupid! He has to kill the rumor, and that means beat the crap out of you."

Andy said, "Just wait, Hail. I'll take care of it."

"Andy! Your hand is already hurt! Now he knows it's the wrong one. I'm not letting you go alone! And I caused it anyway."

"We'll go keep him away," one of the jocks said.

Blair said, "Andy, just keep Jordan here. He'll try to be a jerk-assed-hero otherwise."

"Screw you to hell, Blair," I screamed, but then we heard a bull elephant coming up the path towards us. Blair pushed me towards the trees and said, "JUST GO!" Then she headed towards the clearing and the sound.

Andy's arm tightened on my shoulder, and I was pulled further from the path. When we were twenty feet away he shoved me against a huge oak trunk and held me there with his whole body against mine.

"Andy, let me go," I said, but quietly.

"No, Jord. Really. Discretion's the better part of valor, and like that." His restraint eased into an embrace, and he kissed my forehead. "Besides, you smell, and taste, good."

"Cut it out!"

The path was full of people and meaningless noise. Pike screamed a cussword every other step. and when he reached the cars he bellowed, "Aaaagh. Suckers. Ran Away."

I heard Hancock. "Com'on, Pike, we got other things to do. Leave it."

The elephant and his followers were coming back up the trail. The noises left the path and entered the trees on our side of the trail.

Andy pulled me deeper into the woods, and deep into some brush. I wasn't trying to go back anymore, not to talk to the maker of all that noise, but Andy kept pulling me.

I heard Pike coming towards our thicket. I knew my baby blue sundress would show up easily if he looked this way. Andy was wearing a boy uniform, olive pants and black shirt. I wrapped my dress close to my body and held myself against him, away from the stampede.

When pike had gone past, we found our way out the other side of the brambles and were beside the country club fence.

Andy sat down. I sat right next to him, and he wrapped me in a hug. I pulled back, and he said, "Jordan, even straight guys need hugs sometimes and, boy, you do now."

I hadn't realized how scared I'd been until I noticed how good his holding me and rubbing my back felt.

He whispered, "I could use a hug too, Hails."

Oh well, no one was around, and whether I did or didn't wouldn't change Andy's feelings, or behavior. I wrapped my arms around him and put my head on his chest.

I stayed like that taking deep breathes until he said, "Better, Jord?"

"Uh-huh. You?"

"Uh-huh." He kissed me, this time on the mouth, not head, and this time he put his tongue into my mouth.

My own tongue touched his teeth, then I pulled my head away quickly. "Andy, don't. I don't -- don't want to be gay."

"Good. But I never thought you were crazy or stupid, pretty bug."

I could still hear Pike thundering in the distance, but I chuckled. "Pretty bug!!??"

Andy laughed too. "I don't know. It just popped into my head. Fits you a lot though, Jord."

I was still laughing. "I like you, Andy," I said as I buried my head in his chest again.

"I think you are the best thing around - except for banana pudding ice cream, of course." He moved his head towards my mouth again.

I sat up and turned away from him. "But I just don't. . ."

"We're not going anywhere you don't want to. I'm sorry I kissed you like that, Jord."

I shook my head hard enough to make my hair swing.

There were twigs and leaves stuck to my dress, and I started picking them off. It was something to do besides look at Andy. The noises coming from the clearing and from the trees was still there but getting softer.

Andy saw what I was doing with my dress and said, "You want help with that? And you promised to show me your bellybutton ring, remember? Besides, how did you fool that cop when he stared at you breasts?"

"Shut up, Andy. --- Andy, it's all - all of this - it's all got something to do with the MacGuffin. Getting chased this morning, the fight with Pike, the cops tonight, and the kid following me." I had to fill him in on the part about me being followed, including the story of racking the boy.

"Wow. You have an exciting life, huh? But it can't all tie in, Jord. It's just coincidence. And why would anyone be setting you up anyway?"

"It's got to be Kipperman, doesn't it? He just saw Blair and me, and needed someone to distract the cops. Right?"

"But that would mean he learned who he saw near the fence. Or he's moved on to a girl who happens to also be you. And how would he know you would be at that shop so that boy could find you? He didn't know you were going to be in my car tonight either. Tons of gaps. I don't see it fitting together. Sorry, pretty bug."

"I'm stuck with that name, huh?"

"'Fraid so." He tried to start a long kiss yet again, and I put my fingers on his lips.

"I'm going to go over to the shed on the golf course and look around."

"I've got to go take that pill for my hand, bug."

"I know that. Just ask Tracy to wait 'til I get back and give me a ride, or I'll just walk home. It's not far."

He shook his head. "Not going to happen. You're not going over there alone. The pill can wait. But you have to show me your bellybutton ring first."

That condition got what it deserved -- ignored. "There won't be anyone there at night, Andy. Don't worry about it, besides I can handle myself, you know."

"No kidding. But, buggie, I don't want you to handle it alone. I'm going if you go."

"No! I won't be 'buggie'. No way. I need something to call you. How about 'Bozo'?"

"Non-original."

"That's OK as long as you really, really hate it."

Lots of tiny burrs, beggar's lice, had gotten all over me. Some of them, and some dead leaves and sticks, had even gotten inside the halter top. Andy was covered in the lice too, but his clothes didn't give them the chance to get on the inside. I was trying to pick the burrs out from the inside without pulling the dress too far away from my body.

"Just undo the top. Boys can see each other's chests, remember. Or I'll close my eyes."

I undid the string behind my neck with a sigh, and laid the top across my lap. I don't know why Andy's grin didn't make the beggar's lice easier to see.

"Those are some great boobs, bug."

"Not really. They don't even have nipples. That cop must not have seen very many, and I bet you haven't either."

"My sister knows I'm gay, or maybe she wouldn't care anyway. That must have been scary as shit, Jord. God, that cop could have. . ." Then he stared at me.

I shook my head. I didn't want to talk, or think, about that. "None of the sticks went all the way through. Still, I bet there are little holes and snags all over the place. Pike's a piece of shit. It's brand new."

Andy started plucking gently at the burrs. "You planning on wearing it again?"

""Well. . ." I held my shoulders by my ears for several seconds before I let them drop.

"You do look good. You like being so cute. Admit it."

"Not that good, and boys don't like being cute."

"They're told they don't, but some do."

"And you shouldn't like these clothes, should you?"

"Yeah. No. Hell, Jordan. I see people in stuff like that, and it does nothing for me. But I know who you are, and it's really great. I say to myself it's not about what's between the legs, but then … it is. Or it is because it's you. Or. . ." He held his shoulders up by his ears until he heard me chuckle.

"OK. See my navel ring?"

He flashed his bright smile again and reached over to touch the pin.

"Don't move it around. It's still tender."

He didn't touch the ring, but softly rubbed my stomach and put his finger in my bellybutton. "I like this. It's not an innie or an outie. It's a tweenie."

"That's just because I'm so skinny. You didn't even notice my ear rings."

"Did too. Pretty -- Cute! Your hips are wider than your waist too. Aren't many that way in football locker rooms, even on the guys that aren't just huge road blocks."

I put my hand on top of his as he kept brushing the inside of my navel. "They aren't by very much. -- Andy, -- Andy, I'm almost sixteen. I know it's weird to be that old and never have - never have done it with anyone. Not, you know, anyone, not anything -- but I just want to wait."

"Why do you think it's all just about that, bug? And I doubt it's that weird for sixteen year olds really. You just believe what too many of them say they've done."

"Yeah. You have though?"

I got no answer.

"Who?"

"A tight end at a football camp. I don't know how we dared make a move or which one of us did."

I laughed. "Is a tight end better than a split end?"

"Shut up, creep."

I leaned on his arm. "Was that just sex?"

"Na-uh. He quit football and lives on the coast, but we write. It wasn't It, but it was something. Second one was an old guy, a senior then, last year. A tutor the coach set up. He was obviously gay, and …

"Huh! The coach got you a gay tutor? He knows?"

"Hell no! - I was bigger, so safe, you know? Anyway, I made the first pass. Thought I could get lessons in something besides algebra I guess, but he wasn't that good at either. Meaning something matters to me. OK? That's all of them, pretty bug, promise."

My new name made me smile still, but then I sighed. I felt sorry for Andy. I was sorry I couldn't be It for him.

He was still petting my stomach, and fingering my bellybutton, when I suddenly heard, "Gees, get a room already, Andy."

I turned around before I remembered to pull the top of my dress up over my chest. It was number 43, and I realized there had been people in the woods calling our names for a while.

"We thought this was pretty damn private."

The intruder turned around. He said, "Jojo got Pike into the back of his truck and hauled him away. Hailey's safe."

"OK. We'll head back."

43 disappeared into the trees.

"Shit," I said, and tried fix my top.

"You worry too much. Hold your hair up."

I do not!" I said as he tied a bow to hold up my halter top. "Andy, I don't want to go back there."

"Because Dion saw your tits? He thinks they're real, and he won't talk because he thinks we're serious."

"Not just that. Because of the Pike thing! And I'll have to talk to everyone. And someone is going to recognize me or something. And now you'd be ruined too."

Andy sighed. "Really, don't panic, my pretty bug. I want to show you off! Anyway, it won't be for long. I've got to take that pill.And we have to make a showing, Jord."

We walked along the fence looking for a way around the thick brush.

"Your hand's starting to bother you, huh?"

"A little. How did you know?"

"You mentioned your pill - twice." I placed his left arm on my shoulder and took his right hand to pet.

He said, "That's the first time you've ever done that, bug."

"What? Rubbed your hand?"

"You've never started a hug, or anything. Just allowed that."

"I've said I like you, Andy, OK?"

He moved his good hand down to my waist and held me tighter, but he was quiet.

I was quiet too. I did like him, and I liked holding his hand, and, and I liked him holding me, and -- Jays H. . . . Crud.

It wouldn't work. It wouldn't work. It couldn't work anyway.

When I saw the lights in the clearing, I got on my toes and kissed his chin. I started walking again and began to try to tell him that, even if I wasn't recognized, or read, tonight, in the dark, it would be impossible for me to keep being seen with him. I was never going to get the chance to best the pet name he had given me.

"Andy, . . .," I started softly, but by then I could see into the clearing, and right near the opening I saw Bobby, the brat who had chased me through the mall, and he was with the other boy and with the bigger ones that had been in the car.

I stopped where the path became wider at the clearing's entrance. "Oh, shit, Andy. It's him. The brat from the mall."

"Jordie, you can't hide. I know! Let's disguise you as a boy!"

"Andy, it's not funny. I just. . . Just go ahead, and ask Blair - Blair and Tracy, to come out here a minute, and I'll go over to the shed now."

"Jord, people will want to talk to you. And I mean it, you can't go over there without me."

"Andy! You have to take care of your hand. I'm not letting you come! Just tell everyone I'm too upset. No. No. . . Nevermind. Bobby Creep won't do anything with lots of people around, will he?"

"You mean Bobby Adams? He's just a freshman, wants to be a linebacker."

"You think that makes him not an asshole? It's different for girls, Andy, and, and more different for, for . . ."

"For boys in disguise? I get it, bug. I just wouldn't have thought Bobby would do that. You don't need to go talk to everyone if you don't want."

"They'll all know I'm hiding in the woods, won't they? So, OK, but then I'm going to the shed and don’t be a pain. Go take your pill, please. I'll be OK."

Andy shook his head fast, squeezed me, and kissed me on the forehead.

I said, "I hate you, Alpha."

"Huh??"

"Well, I hate liking you." I stopped and hugged him just as the path got wider.

"Alpha," he said and chuckled. "Yeah, that's more than bad enough."

"There they are!" someone yelled.

A crowd that had been by the swing set surged towards us. Blair, Tracy, and Cynthia, Andy's big sister, were in the lead. I saw Bobby and his whole group walk the opposite direction, and the crowd reached us just before we stepped into the clearing.

Blair reached me first and put her hand on my shoulder.

Tracy yelled, "Jorie, are you OK! Are you OK!" and wrapped me in a hug

Andy's sister started a private conversation with him in spite of the crowd. "About time you got here, twerp. Where's your phone? Dad's been calling and you are in deep shit. We have to go home."

Lots of other people said lots of other things, most directed at Andy.

I said, "Yeah, Trace, fine." I returned her hug and looked at Blair, who just leered back at me.

Andy said, "What for now? It's his rule I can't leave it in my locker, and I forgot to get it from the car. What did you tell him I did, creep?"

Someone from the crowd yelled, "What did the cops get you for this time?"

Another voice said, "They let you go when the realized you’re a hero?"

"Not hardly," Andy said. "Someone told them there was booze in my car. Of course I would never have something like that, so they let me go."

Cynthia said, "Say 'good-bye' to your adoring fans, asshole, and we've got to get out of here right away."

In a quieter voice Andy said, "So what's up his ass this time, pig face?"

"I'll bet it was some Farrel jerk trying to get you up the creek, Andy."

A voice at the back of the crowd said, "No way. We wouldn't do that kind of shit."

"Yeah. Like you wouldn't stomp on his hand!"

Cynthia said, "Look, piss-ant, you've missed two damn pills. He's afraid you won't be able to work out tomorrow, and he's on me like I'm supposed to babysit your runty ass."

Andy hollered, "Nah. It was just mistaken identity is all." He held up his bandaged hand and said, "Look. I've got to get home and take care of this thing. Really, it was no biggie, guys. I'll get you the details later."

"But what happened with that?"

"What did Pike do really?"

"Did she actually kick his fat ass?"

I yelled, "No. Everything you've heard is wrong. OK?"

"Hailey, you can stay. I want to hear about that."

"No. I need to go too."

Part of the crowd drifted back into the clearing. Andy and I dodged a bunch more questions as we walked towards his car, and soon the rest of the group gave up too.

Blair tried to pull Tracy back, but I grabbed her hand and said, "Wait, guys. Will you come with me to the shed on the golf course? Andy won't let me go alone."

"Aww, is he being all macho-protective of little, sweet, precious Jordie now. And you're still going to be the great big hero - heroine, huh, precious?"

"Get the hell over it, Blair! Just forget you! Tracy, will you help me, please."

Cynthia said, "So, shithead, speaking of bottles, did you steal that Jack I had in the trunk?"

"Yeah, slut, I did. Damn lucky, 'cuz I'd be in jail right now otherwise. We better not leave stuff in there anymore."

"Yeah. Well, I'd sold that stuff, dick lick, and made ten bucks on it. I need the money back, and now."

"Like I got that much, bitch."

"Andy! They're holding stuff from the trunk hostage, and I've got to get it back by Monday."

"So what did you do with what they gave you?"

"I spent it, of course. You drank it - you owe me."

"Cyn, I don't have that kind of cash."

"The score sheets for last spring's swimming, golf and tennis teams were all in there. I was supposed to take them to school on Monday. We've got to get it somewhere."

Blair said, "We had some of that bourbon. I'll give you some money."

Andy said, "I'd need like twenty, and none of you really swallowed it. We'll work it out."

"Don't worry about it. I'm rich right now," Blair said.

"Where did you get money, Blair?" I asked. She never had any, ever. I wondered if she was getting herself into something or something.

"This rich asshole threw over forty bucks at me to pay for nine dollars worth of sushi."

"I did!" My mother must have slipped some into my bag. "Give me the rest back, Blair."

She pocketed the extra cash with a smirk.

Cynthia said, "Great. Thanks. You're off the hook for now, dorkus. You're Blair? I kind of thought so, but I thought people were calling you Luke though?"

"Just messing around," Blair said, sounding a bit worried.

Cynthia faced me and said, "And you, you look like a boy."

Quickly Tracy said, "So do you, Cynthia, but no one ever brings it up."

Cynthia laughed at that. "Not too bad for you, Tracy, but I meant she looked like someone -- like that Hailey kid!"

Blair said, "Yeah. It's that she's his cousin on both sides of the family. Lots of people were talking about it all night. That's all it is. Didn't you hear about it?"

"Maybe the sophomores were talking about it, not us."

Andy said, "We're juniors now, Porsche butt. If you've been a senior since May, it's time you got that right."

"Whatever, scuzz breath. But -- No! It's him! Gawd, cum eater, you've taken your perversion to a whole new level!"

Blair and Tracy both yelled she that she was wrong, and I tried to vanish.

Andy, pulled me closer to him. "If I'm cum-eater, what are you, clit throat? You talk about this and I'll put epoxy - moisture activated stuff - on all of your dildos."

Cynthia was roaring with laughter. She opened the driver's side door and said, "Say 'good night' to all you little perv friends, fagot, and let's get home before the old man blows a third gasket."

Andy hugged me tight, and I let him. I even hugged him back. "What's she going to do?"

"Don't worry about her at all, pretty bug. She won't say anything to anyone. Promise."

"You sure?"

"Indubitably!"

"Good. I hate dubitals."

He laughed at my stupid joke, and I grinned at his laughter. He tried to kiss me, and I whispered, "Not in front of them."

He squeezed me, which reminded me that it was probably too late to worry about what they saw, but even if it was too late to matter, I didn't want Blair - any of them - to see it, to see me like it. I just didn't.

I pulled away from him, and I blushed.

Blair snickered. Tracy chuckled. Cynthia chortled.

Andy sighed and then his smile flashed, but it was a sad smile this time, and then I didn't care what they saw. I hugged him hard. He kissed me. I kissed him harder. I wanted to! I wanted to do it! I wanted to do it more.

But I don't know why. I don't know why I wanted to. I don't know if I really wanted to.

"Are you going to the shed?" he asked.

Still in his arms, and with my arms enwrapping him, I said, "Uh-huh."

"Tracy and Blair going too?"

"Uh-huh."

"We could do it tomorrow?"

"Nah-uh. Too many Sunday golfers, and I don't want to wait 'til night. There won't be anyone there now, alpha. It won't be a problem."

"You know how to get in?"

"There's a hole in the back."

"Be careful, please, pretty bug."

Blair and Tracy continued their snickering.

My blush grew warmer. "I will, alphie,"

He went to his side of the car, looking at me the whole time. Then he looked at Tracy and Blair as he opened the door. I knew he wanted to tell them to protect me and hoped he wouldn't. He knew I hoped that, and he didn't say anything.

Blair knew what he wanted to say though, because she said, "Don't worry alpha dog. Lots of people all night long thought I was a boy, so the Beta dog, will watch out for your pretty flea for you."

His eyes frowned for a nanosecond, but then he flashed his smile and said, "See ya round, Trace, Blair. Tomorrow, pretty bug."

--------------------------------------------------------------

19: Go Over It Again

When the car was gone Blair and Tracy's silly laughter got even louder.

"Just Shut Up Already!"

Blair pretended to try, but Tracy didn't respond at all. Instead she said, "You two make such a cute couple, Jordie. It's wonderful!"

"Can we just talk about the MacGuffin? OK?"

Tracy put her arms around my neck and said, "OK. What is it you want to do, Jorie?"

Blair said, "Yeah, Humphrey, but, so why is this your case anyway?"

"Just go over and look around the shed at the country club, Tracy. See if the MacGuffin's still there."

Blair said, "What? You think Kipperman just left it laying in the grass?"

I almost told her the MacGuffin isn't a chicken, but didn't. "There's a way to get inside."

"Oh boy. Breaking and entering. I haven't committed a felony in months."

"Look, Blair, you don't have to come, all right?"

"No, no. I told your alpha dog I'd help you. Lead on, MacDuff."

She got the quote wrong! We had discussed that before too. She probably only did it to annoy me, so I didn't say anything. Besides I didn't want to talk about MacDuff laying on MacBeth any more than I wanted the laying chickens discussion right now.

"But, Jordan, really, why is this your job? Let the police handle it, is all. This isn't a story book! Do you really think you're a Hardy Boy - or I mean Nancy Drew - or something?"

I used a squeaky voice to out sarcasm her. "No, I don't think I'm Nancy Drew or something.

"You don't have to do it if you don't want to! Blair, you're the one that got pulled in this morning. You're one of the people whose footprints they found last night. You're the person that was wearing the white jacket last night, and that's the clue the cops are looking for. And the cops are looking for me too. But if you don't care, just go away. I didn't want to ask you to come anyway."

I had kept moving as we talked and had pulled them almost to the golf course fence, near where Andy and I had sat down only a little while ago, but it seemed even darker under the trees now than it had then. Maybe it was clouding up, but I could see the moonlight glistening brightly on the grass of the fairways, and each distant copse was a shadow island in an eerie, glowing, pea green sea.

I did want some company and ever since the mall I felt closer to Tracy, a lot closer than I did to Blair anyway. "Tracy, do you want to come?"

Tracy was staring at Blair with moon-dog eyes.

Blair said, "OK, Jordan. We'll do your 'case'. Let's go back to the clearing and talk about it. We should make plans."

"No! I'd have to talk to everyone about everything. I'm going to the shed. Come or go. Whatever."

Tracy said, "Wait, Jorie. Please. If you don't want to go to the fire ring, let's go to Starbuck's and talk. We should talk about it."

"Tracy, we can talk about it on the way to the shed if you want to come. I haven't done enough on it all day."

"But, Jorie, I don't really know what is going on. Can we sit down and talk about what you've discovered."

Tracy was half way sitting next to a tree already, and she tugged on my arm to get me to sit next to her. I gave in, and she moved to be right next to me with one hand petting my hair. Her other hand held on to Blair's wrist, the way she would have held the arm of child who wanted to escape.

"Trace, that's the whole thing. I haven't really discovered anything at all. But the cops, crazy cops, tried to arrest Andy and me. They chased me all over town this morning after Kipperman pointed me out to them. And I'm being followed all over town by those kids. And Pike wants to kill me. It's got to be a huge gang."

Blair stood by us, looking down on us, holding one set of fingers in her jeans' pocket, but she had stopped trying to pull her other arm away from Tracy's grip.

Tracy was rubbing my neck now. "OK. Let's start at the beginning. OK? Someone broke a window, took the MacGuffin, then told the police it was you two."

"Uhh. No. There was glass in the MacGuffin's box. So it was gone before the window was broken, but the window must have been set up to throw the cops off, right? But finding the people who broke it - maybe - we could find out who told them to break it."

Blair asked, "And how do you know about this glass?" I couldn't see her face well in the dark, but I could hear the sneer in her voice.

"I looked in the cop's data base. But they don't even seem to be looking into that."

Tracy said, "You got into the police computers?!"

"Only for a couple of minutes." I didn't tell them how I'd missed that opportunity too.

"Did they say anything in there about you by name?"

"Not me, and only about Blair being confined to home, and for all cops to watch and follow her. Which is a contradiction, huh? That's why she needed to be disguised. And I couldn't find out who told them Blair had a white sports coat, or why the Lieutenant arrested her."

"I don't think that was that Lieutenant. It was this other cop, and she showed up and then they let me go right away."

"But she's in charge of the investigation, and she was in charge of those asshole cops tonight. Was it two guys named Chuck and Kyle that arrested you?"

"I wasn't arrested, Jordan. Just questioned. And I just told them I'd taken the jacket off last night, and didn't know where it was. I didn't mention you. And how would I know their first names?"

"I'm just trying to figure out how many crooked cops there are in on this whole thing. OK."

Blair snorted. "You should be a right wing talk show guy. There's conspiracies everywhere, huh?"

"You explain it then!!"

Tracy cut in. "But, Jorie, we do know who broke the window. It was Pike. Remember, Jojo said he broke one screwing around."

Gaw, he had! OK, well I hadn't really had any time to think about things, had I?"

"But that doesn't sound like a plot or anything," Tracy added.

"Except that he just happened to be screwing around at just the right time."

Tracy was on Pike's side for some reason. "Or the wrong time. It got Kipperman pissed at them."

"But we don't really know that Pike's window was the one in the room where the MacGuffin was. Or, umm, maybe Kipperman didn't want the MacGuffin's disappearance to show up last night. I guess that makes sense. And those two stoners, Syd and Lori, were with them too!" I had just blown off what Lori had said. Stupid.

Blair said, "We don't really know the MacGuffin hasn't been missing for months either."

Blair was just being snide, but she was right. "OK. But if he took it earlier, Kipperman must have hidden it in the shed for all that time. More reasons to go look there."

Tracy said, "Not months. The reason it was at the country club was because of a display for the Forth of July thing, and my brother was joking about them still having the display up, showing it off, last weekend."

"We'll have to talk to Lori about the broken window, and see if it's that one. But if the window isn't a lead, what is? Who ever told them that Blair had that jacket was in on it, but that name wasn't in the cop computer. It just said, 'a friend at Northfield Hi.'"

Blair said, "There's an informant at school! Some narc."

"Yeah."

Blair sat on her heels. She let go of Tracy - even though Tracy was touching me - and started drawing lines in the dirt with her finger. Her wheels were turning at last!

She said, "OK. But that doesn't make it some crazy cop internal affairs thing. They were looking for the jacket anyway. . ."

"That was because of Kipperman. It was on the computer that he reported that."

"So really that just means the cops are hiding the identity of who told them I have a white coat. Nothing there, Jordan."

"But at least some cops are in on it! Those two that chased me this morning and stopped Andy tonight, and that lieutenant."

Tracy said, "Probably not the same cops. They don't work twenty-four seven, and I can't see it being Lieutenant Stern. I mean she really has something up her ass, all right, but it's too far up it for her to go bad."

"And she is Mr. Friend's girlfriend," Blair added, and they both laughed.

"It is weird he would have a real hard assed cop girlfriend. He's always on the kid's side when there is trouble."

"It's weird he would have any," Tracy said, "but he works with the police a lot. Tracking kids on probation and stuff. And, Jorie, he isn't the same for everyone that he is for you, really."

"That stuff he tries to get people into is so they will have good college apps and resumes. He got me into Honors English," I said.

"Ooohh," Blair said, "we are all impressed, and he must be cool then."

"You could be in it too, Blair, if you wanted to be! If you tried! You think being dumb is an accomplishment! But Mr. Friend kept those two cops from checking on the pills they found."

"What pills?" Tracy asked, and I filled her in on the pills I found in Kipperman's truck.

"Jordan! I should have given those back to him. I could get in huge crap for taking stuff from the cars. Let me have them."

"I - umm - Mr. Friend kept them. I don't think anyone will know where they went. They were in a piece of note paper down behind a seat and probably were lost a long time ago. Really, Trace. And they might not be Kipperman's but one of the kids' that works for him. If they were his worker's would you have wanted to give them to him?"

Tracy bit her lip.

Blair said, "Tracy, they are Jordan's estrogen pills. He's just making that up."

"Oh! Shut Up, Blair!" She knew better than that. I think she did anyway.

"So then, Andy told the cops they were my birth control pills."

While Blair snickered I said, "Because they thought I was a girl! And to explain why I didn't want them to find them. And Mr. Friend talked them into not looking them up on their computers."

"Did Mr. Friend know what they were? What did they look like."

Blair said, "Tiny and pink. With a picture of a Siamese dancer on them. Looked like trannie pills to me. You can just tell us, Jordan."

"It looked more like a snake on them to me, and that is what Officer Benwell thought it was too."

Tracy said, "I've never seen any like that."

"OK, look. I don't really think the pills have anything to do with the MacGuffin, right? They might not be illegal, and I'll try to find out on my computer. I was just curious if Kipperman had some deadly disease or something."

"Na-uh. You're right about that. They wouldn't be Kipperman's, not in that little truck. But they weren't X or anything. They might be legal."

Blair said, "So all we really know is the broken window had nothing to do with it. And Kipperman told them it was us, but not why he said that."

"So they wouldn't start looking at him."

"Yeah, we were handy. But the guys that broke the window were handier. Why not them?"

"Because he'd hired them. And because, if the police thought it was them, they still would have looked for it in the shed. He didn't want the cops going there. Which means we should!"

Both of them just stared at me. I jumped up and said, "Let's go!" and they actually followed me.

I marched along the country club fence. The thick brush of the forest on one side blocked out all light. A few glimpses of the sky showed no stars, no clouds, only areas of deep, deep blue-black, which somehow shone with darkness. The thinner layer of trees across the fence allowed frequent views of the expanses of grass beyond. Expanses that still glowed with an eerie green light. Expanses we would have to cross to reach our goal.

Tracy walked with both her hands on Blair's shoulders and arms. Blair moved with her head erect, shoulders back, and arms swinging. They whispered to each other the whole time, and they gradually fell behind me, but they did keep following. This felt almost normal: them together, me with them but apart. But this time I wasn't behind or off to the side, I was leading -- that was different. And it felt sort of like a mutiny.

We came to the passage onto the golf course, a well known hole in the fence, still deep in the trees. I pulled the chain links apart and waited for them. Blair pulled on the other side of the gap while Tracy crawled through. Then she made an elaborate swoop with her arm to say: "You first. I am gallant."

I rolled my eyes, or actually my whole head, but it was probably too dark for her to see the gesture. Then when I was crawling through the hole she stuck her finger between my thighs and jerked it up between my cheeks.

I lunged through the hole and fell to the ground. "Damn you, asshole!"

She roared with laughter like an idiot.

Tracy asked me what she had done, and I said, "The fucking creep goosed me!"

Still laughing, Blair said, "Well, it's an important lesson for you to learn, little alpha's flea. If you wear tiny, baby blue, baby doll dresses, hide your pretty patties. You didn't get to learn that when you were a little girl, huh?"

"Just fuck you!Fuck off!I'm just doing this for the MacGuffin.I don't care what you think.It was your fucking idea!"

"Hey, come on guys!" Tracy said.

I said, "You almost managed to pretend to be human again for a while. Prick!"

"It was my idea to get you out of the park instead of into jail, Jordan. It wasn't my fucking idea for you to run around like that all day, in mini-dresses. It wasn't my fucking idea for you to have a huge cache of clothes in your closet and fake tits too. It wasn't my ideas for you to do this all the time for years without ever telling me or anyone."

"Yeah, well, look how you've acted, and I knew you would be a total asshole bastard, Blair."

"Huh? How could you know that? How? You know, I thought we were friends, Jordan. Stupid idiot me."

"You saw me once and were a total asshole the whole night then too."

"When?"

"Halloween. When I was a bride. Do you think I was stupid enough to go through that again? Even on cross-dress day at nerd camp I kept as far from you as I could."

"I was eleven!"

"Twelve. Seventh grade. That's why I never went trick-or-treating with you again."

"Jord, I thought you would think I was weird if I didn't say things like that. I thought you looked great, but I couldn't tell you that, could I? And I don't want you to stop dressing like a girl either, if you want too."

"Oh, thank you sooo, so much. Like I need your fucking approval, ever."

"You told Tracy you would stop if I wanted you to. That's why I said that, jerk!"

"Well, you know what? That was back when I thought you mattered, I guess."

Tracy broke in. "Hey, guys, come on. Stop. We've got important stuff to do, right, Jorie? Come on."

Blair said, "Well, I don't care if you dress like a 'ho. Why should I? But I don't like trotting along behind you like a minion in some kind of adventure movie - no, it's one of your noir things, right.

"Look I didn't look for all of this. And I didn't invent it. And I didn't like getting chased by squad cars, but I did. I don't like getting followed all over town, but I have been, and someone has been telling them where I'll be all the time, all the effing time. I don't like getting tied up on the street by cops with my underwear showing for the world to look at. . ."

"Underwear!" Blair said with the fakest laugh I've ever heard, "They're Panties, Jordan. You are wearing panties and a super short dress, and you like it!"

…And I don't like it when my friend - someone I thought was a friend - gets their house raided at dawn and taken in by the cops for nothing. And I don't like your shit. Your constant shit. I don't care if you're jealous of me. And I don't care what the hell you like or don't like anymore. Just go away."

I walked off, and I didn't look at them. I worked my way though the trees without turning around. I didn't care what they were doing. Not at all. I reached the edge of the trees and kept walking just under them without looking back. They didn't matter at all. I had to do this, and would alone if I had to. I didn't even glance back.

When I got to a sand trap Tracy kissed Blair, pull away from her, and started trotting after me. Blair watched her and then turned and went back into the trees. Good riddance to her!

Tracy caught up to me and said, "It's OK, Jorie. She's had a bad day, you know."

"SHE has! Tell me about it. But don't -- I don't want to talk or think about her."

"Yeah. She didn't do that well as a boy, and I had to tell Jojo and Hancock about her and that it was a joke. But then Heather Davies came on to her and. . ."

"Yuck!" I said, "But I don't care, Trace. I really don't. Just forget her. You don't have to, but I am. Let's go. OK?"

"Yeah, OK, Jor. We're still BFFs, very best GIRL friends, right?"

I nodded. "If you want."

She grinned and kissed my nose and wiped some moisture from my cheek. It must have been really humid out here. I was sweating more than I thought.

I hugged her.

We stayed under the trees, going the long way, skirting the edge of the florescent sea of grass and holding hands the whole way. Only once did we have to step into the moon light. We trotted over the fairway and gnats and dew lapped around our ankles. When we reached the safety of he trees again we grinned and sighed and hugged each other, but neither of us spoke until we reached the back of the garden shed.

Tracy said, "There's no alarms and no one here right?"

I started to nod.

Someone inside the building screamed, "NO, GODDAMN IT!"

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Many, many thanks to my friends and great betareaders/editors, Kristina and Daphne, and to everyone who has ever commented on a story, mine or anyone's, and to all the patient readers who are still here with me.