"Could one of you take the crew some coffee,” Helmut requested – the others had their hands full with the actual ‘guests’.
"I'll do it,” I sighed – to be truthful I just wanted out of the kitchen for a bit.
"Thanks, Gaby.”

I slipped the cooks apron off before going out to the bar where the coffee machines live. Cups, saucers, cream, sugar, spoons, the passengers get a dinner mint, I dropped half a dozen on the tray and after checking my appearance, grabbed the freshest coffee jug.
 

"Hi, food okay?”
"Excellent thank you,” Julie replied in German.
"Er sorry, I forget not everyone speaks German.”
"That’s alright,” Phil allowed, "It’s not often we can’t make ourselves understood.”
"Yeah but I really need to practice my English,” I sighed.
"If you ask me it’s fine,” Julie opined as I set out the coffee cups.
"Tell that to Mum,” I sighed.
"Amanda said you were in the kitchen tonight,” Julie prompted.
"Yeah, Eva did her wrist earlier so I got the gig.”
"Well it was very good.”
"It’s not rocket science.”
"Well I know I couldn’t do it,” she admitted.
"I am sort of making it my career, we’re opening a kiosk up in Altenahr on Monday.”
"We?”
"Me and Con, the tall one with the coffee pot,” I indicated across the room.
"The place by the bridge?” Phil queried.
"That’s it,” I agreed.
"I said someone was doing it up,” Phil noted to his colleague.
I had a light-bulb moment, "Back in a moment.”
 
"Con!”
"Wassup?”
"You bring some flyers up?”
"In my basket still.”
"Great.”

I dodged past an incoming Mand and out to the bikes where I located a couple of stacks of Con’s Kabin flyers. Okay they’re not exactly fancy, but they’ve got all the info, next time we’ll have a photo on the front. I grabbed them and returned inside to the restaurant.
 

"Back,” I pointlessly stated pulling a couple of flyers from one of the stacks, "If you stop in Altenahr pop and see us.”

Phil took a flyer and quickly homed in on ‘English Pies’.

"English Pies?”
"You’ve got to have an angle right,” I told him, "We’re doing all the usual stuff too, würst, fries, frikadel.”
"Where are you getting pies from?” Julie asked, clearly intrigued.
"Con’s parents have a bakery, we do a different one each week there so we’ll just do some extras for the kiosk.”
"We’ll have to pop in next time we’re over,” Phil suggested, "Can we take a couple of these?”
"Sure,” I readily agreed.
"I'll tell Chris and Den, they’re out next,” Julia advised, "Den’s a bit of a pie man.”
"Not half,” Phil agreed.
"Take a few more,” I suggested peeling several more copies from the pile.
"We’ll pass them on,” Julia confirmed.
"Cheers, I'd best get back to work or Helmut’ll be docking my wages.”
"Well good luck next week,” Phil offered.
"Thanks, safe journeys.”
 

We were cleared up quite quickly this time, Helmut sent Con, Mand and me home just turned nine.

"You were getting cosy with the driver back there,” Mand opined.
"Telling them about the kiosk.”
"Dead useful,” Con proposed as we turned onto Zaungarten for the ride back to Dernau.
"Is so, get them to come and they’ll tell their passengers, their bus was parked at the Bahnhof earlier, bet they go on the chairlift, they’re bound to want a drink or snack.”
"She’s not just a pretty face,” Mand mentioned to Con.
"I could cope with her being cute, it’s the rest that worries me,” Con smirked.
"I. Am. Not. Cute!” I stated through gritted teeth.
"You so are,” Mand stated.
 

"What happened to you?” Juliette asked when we emerged from the bike shed.
"I was in the kitchen,” I told the assembled diners pulling a chair out to join them.
"Why were you in the kitchen?” Mum asked.
"Eva sprained her wrist.”
"Hope you didn’t poison anyone,” Jules teased.

I did a very adult tongue poke in response.

"We’ve only just sat down,” Mum advised as I surveyed their plates, hmm, home-made chilli, "Yours are in the micro.”
"I'll do it,” Mand offered much to my relief.
"So how come you’re here?” I asked my sister.
"I do live here,” she stated.
"Sometimes.”
"I needed some er books,” she admitted.
"I could’ve brought them,” Mand put in from her position by the microwave.
"No, I mean I wasn’t sure where they were and I wanted to see Mum anyway.”

Me smells a rat.
Ding!
My attention was diverted as Mand dropped a hot plate of steaming chilli and rice in front of me – hmm, nice.
 

"Your Apollinaris frock’s clean?” Dad enquired as Mum started dishing out ice cream to follow the chilli.
"Might be,” I allowed, I think I washed it after Celle.
"Make sure it is, you too please, Manda.”
"Why the sudden interest in women’s apparel, Dad?” Jules asked.
"Er yeah, what she said,” I added.
"George has organised a team meal Friday night,” Mum stated from behind me, "I'm sure he mentioned it Tuesday.”
"He did,” Mand confirmed, "But Gab’s was gallivanting with the Angels.”
"Gallivanting eh?” Jules snorted.
"We went for dinner,” I stated in my defence, "So what’s this dinner for?”
"Well he thought it would be nice, as both teams are at the ring on Saturday, to get everyone together,” Dad supplied.
"Where are the others staying?” I probed.
"That place by the tunnel.”
"Above the Tanzklub?”
"Where the bikers stay,” he confirmed.
"They’ll love that,” Mand opined.
"You fancy a trip tomorrow, kiddo?”
"I'm supposed to be folding flyers with Con.”
"You don’t fancy coming to pick up the camper then,” Dad tempted.
“From Wuppertal?”
"Hagen actually,” Mum added.
"Can Con come? Oh I sort of invited her for Sunday dinner.”
"Turning into a right do,” Dad mentioned with a shake of his head.
"Yes she can come tomorrow if she wants,” Mum confirmed.
 

"You never said we were leaving at silly o’clock,” I complained as we navigated the streets of Dernau.
"You never asked,” Dad observed.

When I rang Con last night she’d ducked out, preferring to fold flyers at home even though I suggested we could do it in the car on the way. Mind you, perhaps she didn’t fancy a trip with Mum driving, I have to say I don’t envy Dad sat in the front. In theory the drive up won’t be much longer than going to Ron’s but I'm guessing the return will be somewhat slower.

I made a pillow of my cardigan and made myself comfortable – might as well get a few z’s on the way up.

 
"Gab?”
"Hmm?”
"We’re here,” Dad informed me as Mum nosed the A Klasse into Wuppercampers yard.

As you might guess the place was full of camper vans, old school VW buses rubbing shoulders with huge new truck based Cloud-liners.

"Where’s ours?”
"Best go find out,” Dad suggested once Mum had the handbrake engaged.

We trooped over to the office where we were greeted by a paunchy chap with an Asterix moustache but not much hair on top.

"Dave!”
"Conrad,” Dad exchanged a handshake with the man.
"Conrad,” Mum allowed as he moved to her.
"And this?”
“Our youngest, Gabrielle, she rides on the team,” Mum mentioned.
"Ah, the famous Radrennerin.”

I had my hand shaken too before mention was made of the purpose of our visit.

"So, it’s all ready for you,” Conrad told us leading us through a showroom of camper accessories, "New tyres all round.”
"The shower?” Mum queried.
"A loose wire Frau Bond, you’ll need fuel I'm afraid.”
"We’ll live,” Dad told him as we reached another door which Conrad opened.
"So what do you think, Gabrielle?”
"It’s big,” I managed.

The big chap chuckled, "Big. come, come, we can do the paperwork inside, Dave while the ladies check it out.”
Of course my parents have been around it last weekend but their descriptions hardly do it any kind of justice. It is huge, three axles, it’s like a not so small coach! I used to think our old LT was quite big but this behemoth dwarfs that sort of thing. I eagerly clambered inside followed by Mum.

"Well?” Mum queried.
"It’s amazing.”
"Come on, I'll give you the tuppeny tour whilst your Dad sorts out the paperwork with Conrad.”
"Sure,” I enthused.
"We’ll start at the back.”

I won’t bore you with an exhaustive description of the mobile palace but for those who like some detail here’s a quick resume. So it’s got a fully equipped galley, proper shower and toilet, sleeps six although I reckon you could get at least two more in if you utilised the lounge area. Dad reckons there’s enough room underneath for all the bikes and other stuff, yeah this thing really is massive.
 

Maddy Bell © 28.02.17