Someone died

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When I was in Thailand to get my body remodeled, there was a person there who was sort of the coordinator. She was TG,post op, Canadian, and had been a teacher. She drank a lot, a lot! Her job was to insure that we got to the hospital and then to the clinic afterward for thrice daily dilation, and generally see to our welfare. For her it was all about the bars, and male conversations. I could see she was deeply troubled and felt sorry for her, though she resisted any effort to help her to a less destructive life style. I suggested that we go to some of the tourist sites but she wanted to drink and go to cheap shopping centers, no culture.

So, we were in contact once when she was fired and returned to Vancouver BC to live, but her life was still very much about drinking and other self destructive things. Not that I am judging but you can not help someone who is not willing to be changed.

I recently found out that she died in her sleep in Vancouver, and feel sad for a life wasted.

Should she be added to our board or is that for authors only?

Gwendolyn

Comments

Authors only, really

erin's picture

Sorry but if I opened it up to other people there would be no end to it.

I too regret the passing of someone who touched a lot of lives but was not happy in herself.

Hugs,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

Dear Gwen,

You and many other Tpeople knew her; I'm sorry for your and their loss.

She might have been able to do more and better for and with herself, but if she were a teacher and helped many TSs, then her life was not entirely wasted. You know what they say, that everyone is really doing the best that they can. It might have been an achievement for her to live as long as she did. She might have been holding off suicide; as you say, she was deeply troubled.

Very sorry,

Hugs and Bright Blessings,
Renee

Re Dear Gwen.

I can understand Gwen's sadness at the loss of such a person who obviously helped so many.

I am also much affected by your words 'holding off suicide'. I secretly wonder how many of us are doing that by whatever means we can.
Well, if there is such a thing as an 'afterlife' she's at peace now.

Thanks Gwen, but I think Erin's right on this one even for somebody who has helped so many of our sisters, the BC list should be reserved for those who contribute whatever they can to BC.

Much love Gwen and Renee.

XZXX

Beverly.

bev_1.jpg

She may have just been an addict

... and believe you me I suspect she died of her disease. It takes an incredible effort to rehab substance abusers and there is nothing people can do for her if she won't ask for help. I have an ongoing struggle with my ex-partner who is staying sober only because she is flat broke. The desire is still there though *sigh*.

Kim

When you can save a life it

When you can save a life it is the greatest thing you can ever do. It may be by CPR, or have someone make a promise to you that that person will not commit suicide, or change a person's direction in life, or pull that person from an accident. I know her death hurts you, but feel good that you made the effort to be her friend and tried to redirect her life. I suggest you listen to two quotes that are appropriate:

1. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.
2. "People die. Doctors can't stop people from dying." (MASH Dr. Henry Blake to Dr. Hawkeye Pierce)

You did the best you could.

I Feel for your loss

When you can save a life it is the greatest thing you can ever do. It may be by CPR, or have someone make a promise to you that that person will not commit suicide, or change a person's direction in life, or pull that person from an accident. I know her death hurts you, but feel good that you made the effort to be her friend and tried to redirect her life. I suggest you listen to two quotes that are appropriate:

1. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.
2. "People die. Doctors can't stop people from dying." (MASH Dr. Henry Blake to Dr. Hawkeye Pierce)

You did the best you could.