Previously

After morning assembly we went to our classroom and did a couple of subjects till the morning break bell rang and we all filed out to the playground and had our bits of fruit or cake. When the bell rang again, our teacher was at the play ground and said “Alright everyone, you know what sport you all belong to so off you go.”

Jenny and I started to walked to the tennis courts and I said, “These uniforms are not the right ones for playing tennis in.”

Jenny replied, “well it is only the colour that is wrong, but they said it would be too expensive to have separate uniforms for different sports.”

Anyway, I still had a strapped up ankle so I would only be watching that day. Sports day was a short day for some students because most of the teachers were out in the playground, so there were no teachers left to go back to the class room. Mummy must have known about that because she came to the tennis courts and waited till Jenny had finished her game and then we collected our school bags and Mummy took us home. Jenny came to our place for her Mum to pick her up later in the afternoon. We played with the dogs till Jenny's Mum arrived.

There was no home work on Tuesdays because of sports so I wrote some more stuff in the diary that Rose gave to me to record all my feelings and emotions in when I started taking my girl pills.

I didn't know what I was supposed to write because I didn't feel any different, so I went out to the kitchen where Mummy was putting the saucepan full of vegetables on the stove to boil for dinner. There was also a meat loaf in the oven that I could smell as I entered the kitchen, which almost made me forget what I was going to ask Mummy.

Mummy said, “Hello sweetheart, what's wrong? You have a worried look on your face.”

That made me remember what I was there for and said, “Mummy I am confused. What am I supposed to write in the diary because I don't feel any different.”

“Carla, that is what Rose will wants to know because that means you are not having any problems with taking the hormone pills that Rose has prescribed for you.”

“Ok but there is one thing, my nipples are all itchy. Will I put that in the diary as well?”

“Oh Carla, you are a funny little girl aren’t you?”

“Yes Mummy so you keep telling me.” I then asked, “Will I start growing breasts now, and how big will they get?”

Mummy came and gave me a hug and said “Darling it will take a couple of years before you have to worry about your breasts getting too big, but yes it does mean that they are starting to develop.”

I replied “Jenny's nipples are doing the same thing so we will both get our breasts together won't we?”

Mummy said, “I expect so sweetheart, that is what is supposed to happen to girls after all.”

“Can you buy me some trainer bras like the one you want me to wear under my bridesmaid gown?”

“Darling I will just check the dinner, and then I will show you what I have for you in my bedroom ok?”

We went to Mummy's bedroom and Rita followed us in and said, “Is that what you were doing at Mary's today Mum?”

“Yes Rita, and I bought you a couple of new ones as well but you can pay me back out of your wages on Friday.”

“Yeah, thanks Mum.”

I looked at about six bras on Mummy's bed and said, “Are they all for me?”

Mummy replied, “Well, I think they might be a little bit small for me so they must be for my little Carla mustn't they?”

“Ooh Mummy thank you! Can I try one on now?”

“Yes darling but don’t go to bed with it on will you.”

I put it on and it felt nice and I almost walked out of the room without putting my top back on and Rita said, “I can't remember getting that excited about my first bra.”

Mummy then said, “If we don’t go and see to the dinner the man of the house will be going down to the restaurant to get fed.” so we made our way back to the kitchen where Daddy was looking in the oven to see how long it would be before we could eat dinner, and he said, “Hello ladies. When do we eat? I'm hungry enough to eat a horse.”

Rita replied, while Daddy gave Mummy a kiss, “Dad, we don't eat horses in Australia.”

Daddy said, after he gave Mummy another kiss this time on the lips, “Well, I think there is a butcher in Melbourne that caters for some European immigrants that have a taste for horse flesh.”

I said, “How could anyone even think of eating their horse?”

Mummy replied, “Carla, it's true people in certain countries eat horse meat.”

“But Mummy that is no different than eating your own dog. These people are gross.”

Daddy said, “Donna do you think we should tell her?”

“Tell me what Daddy?”

Mummy said, “Never mind sweetheart, lets set the table so we can eat what I have cooked instead.”

We sat down and had our meal but it still bothered me that someone would eat their horse.

Daddy asked, “And how was your day at school Carla?”

“Oh it was ok I guess, but it was hard not being able to play tennis with Jenny because of my ankle, but I should be right to play next week.”

Rita said, “What about swimming in spring when the pool opens for the summer season. Does the school have swimming carnivals?”

“Yeah they do. Jenny was telling me about that today, so I will definitely be in the my class swimming team.”

Mummy said, “Right girls, clear the table and we can have the rice and custard pudding I brought home from the restaurant for desert.”

We didn't have to be told twice to clear the dinner plates away because it is Aunty Bella's rice pudding that she makes for the restaurant. After desert was over Rita and I helped clean up the kitchen. I decided to go to my room and write in my diary about how I am feeling. Daddy was watching some show on the telly and Mummy and Rita were looking through a dress pattern book because Rita is getting interested in doing some sewing again.

I wrote 'Dear diary, this is the first time I am writing anything in here and I don't really know what I should write about, but my gender doctor, Rose San -Lee has asked me to write down how I feel about things as I am taking 'girl pills' now. The only thing I have noticed is that I have got itchy nipples the same as my friend Jenny and she is a real girl so that must mean I am one too. I will say good night now and write some more tomorrow night. Oops I almost forgot it is Tuesday the thirtieth of June nineteen fifty nine.'

The next couple of days went by fairly quickly but on Friday our class was going for a little bus trip out about twenty miles to a spot that was a sacred aboriginal site, and seeing I knew more about the subject than our teacher Peter Taylor, I was very nervous when I asked him, “Do you have permission from the Aboriginal elder to visit the site because ''white fellas'' are not normally welcome at these sacred sites without permission?”

He replied, “We will be doing a detour to the reservation and be taking a member from the local tribe with us.”

I said, “I know a bit of the language that they speak because of me being friends with Alice. You wouldn't know that Alice has Aboriginal blood in her because she takes after her late father who had lily-white skin and was Irish.”

Not all the class went with us. There were about ten that went to have a look at some cattle being loaded on the livestock train which would take them to Rockhampton. So we had twenty students on the bus which our teacher also drove.

When we got to the reservation it was I that went and greeted the man that was one of the elders at the camp, and I spoke a few words that I had learnt from Alice to him. He was impressed and invited me to come back to his camp any time that I wanted to hear some Dreamtime stories. I must say the other kids were really impressed with me being able to communicate with this very old man in his own tongue, he could speak a very broken English so we mixed a few of the words that I could not say.

A younger man accompanied us to the sacred site so we had a lesson on bush tucker which I already knew about from my time with my Aboriginal mate on River Downs ,so this is nothing new to me. As I have said, I can go bush and stay there and survive as long as I wanted. I even knew how to find water to drink in dry creek bed. All you needed is a stick to dig with and know what to look for and hey presto you have water to drink.

Jenny is most impressed with me speaking to the elder and said, “Do you think Alice can see if we can both come out to the camp and listen to that old man tell us the Dreamtime stories?”

I replied, “Jenny, that old man has invited me to come to his camp any time I feel like it, so you can come with me but we will have to talk someone into driving us out here - it's too far to be riding our bikes.

Jenny said, “Leave that to me. Don’t forget I’m Daddy's little girl.” We both had to giggle at that.

Anyway the other kids listened to the man tell them all about being able to live off the land and the land is like your mother or father and will look after you, and he talked about the ''rainbow serpent'' which I will tell you about some other time because it was time to get on the bus and go home. On the way back to the school we sang 'Waltzing Matilda' and 'Click go the Shears.' We were soon back at the school to pick up our school bags and go home. Mummy was waiting for us at the main gate in Daddy’s car again, and this time I asked, “Mummy why are you driving Daddy’s car now?”

Mummy replied, “Daddy is using the Land Rover to carry the fuel pumping equipment to use at the aerodrome to refuel the aircraft that ask for it, so this is my car now.”

It was Friday, so Jenny was coming to stay the weekend with me again and Ricky was also coming over to watch some some football show with Peter and their dad Barry, ''the school principal.'' Rita was also taking Saturday afternoon off because she wanted to spend more time with Peter, probably to to do some more kissing in her room, ''rolling eyes''.

I thought to myself 'Why can Rita kiss Peter all she likes and I am not allowed to kiss Ricky? 'Snot fair'. And while I was thinking that, Jean had to put her two cents worth in and was in my mind clear and loud and said, “Sis, if we kiss Ricky he will want to do more than just kiss.”

I replied in full voice which made Jenny, who was sitting beside me on the bed jump, when I said, “What is this ''we'' business Jean?”

She replied, “Well if you remember back when you visited my grave before you left River Downs, you said that I will be living my life in your body and where you go I would be with you?”

I said, “Yes, but does that mean you share everything I do?”

“Yes Carla it does, so you had better get used to it, because you can never get me out of your mind. We are one soul and one spirit.” and then she said “I love you Sis” and then went quiet.

Jenny was getting all excited and said, “Next time can we try to do that together like we did last time Carla?”

I replied, “Well as long as we are somewhere that we won't be disturbed we can try but I think it takes a lot out of Jean to do that.”

Jenny said, “I heard your side of the conversation about kissing Ricky but what is the problem?”

“Jenny everything I do, Jean is there with me till the day I die.”

“Ooh don’t say die like that it scares me.”

“Well we only go to another dimension so we don't really stop existing. We will just live in the spirit world.”

Mummy came into my room and said, “You have been talking to Jean haven’t you Carla?”

I replied, “Yeah! but how on earth did you know that? You were out in the kitchen all the time when I was talking with her.”

Mummy replied, “Sweetheart, ever since you made the connection with me and Jean the last time, I can feel the vibrations in my chest when you two are communicating, and I think Rita does as well, although I don’t know if she quite knows that is what it is.”

Jenny said, “Wow, does it mean it will also effect me like that as well?”

Mummy said “We will have to talk to Rose about that, and Carla make sure you write all this in your diary as well. Ok you two, get yourselves all prettied up and don’t take all night about it or we will leave you at home.”

Jenny and I looked at each other and said at same time “Where are we going Mummy?”

'“Just get ready and you will find out.” and left the room shaking her head saying to herself, I'm sure they both called me Mummy then.' We looked at each other and said skirts and both fell about giggling and went to my wardrobe and pulled out two denim skirts and warm tops that matched the skirts. It was cold outside at night so we put on black tights. I gave Jenny a lend of one of my new bras so we both had some shape up top, and to make sure we put rolled up socks in the bra cups as well.

Rita came out of her bedroom all dolled up make-up and all, and said, “Go and sit down at the dressing table, you two and I will do your hair and put a tiny bit of make up on both of you.”

We still weren’t told where we were going but said 'yes' to the hair and make up. I wore my hair down. It was getting really long and Rita said she would have to take me to town in the next week and get it trimmed into some shape to make it easier for me to manage. She did Jenny's hair the same as mine and we both had pink barrettes in to hold it in place and when she finished that she said, “Ok now I can tell you where we are going tonight.”

She asked me what the date was, I had to think and said, “Oh my God!! How could I forget Mummy's birthday and why didn't she say something this morning?”

“Carla it's alright, I didn't remember either until Dad said something to me and I said the same thing, but he said Mummy just wanted to see if we would remember without being told.”

I said, “Rita, I feel just awful now.” and rushed out of the room in tears and straight into Mummy's bedroom and hugged her and said, “Mummy I’m so sorry that I didn't even remember your birthday.”

I had tears running down my face and was spoiling the little make up that Rita had put on my face.

Mummy said, “Look at you sweetheart, all your make up is ruined. You forget my birthday because there is so much happening in your own life at the moment.”

“But Mummy I have no present for you. You should have said something to me this morning on the way to school.”

“Yes I suppose I should have and that was mean of me, but I’ll make it up to you tonight alright?”

I replied “Where are we going?”

Mummy said, “We are only going to the restaurant but have closed it to the public just for tonight so we could invite all our new friends to my birthday party.”

Rita had to redo my make up and then we all got into the car and went to the restaurant. It was seven o'clock and there were about thirty people there including the Smith family so I was happy.

Tom Granger and his wife Margaret were also there. That's why I heard a helicopter earlier in the afternoon, and the guy that took us to Brisbane in his plane was also there, not the first one the last one. His name is Rodney Schultz. The party got under way. And Rita, Aunty Bella and Helen helped Alice and Linda get the meals to the tables. Ricky sat next to me and he introduced a boy our age or maybe a bit older and said, “Carla and Jenny this is my friend Billy Wilson and he is in the school choir and wanted to meet you and Jenny so I asked your Mum to invite him tonight.”

Billy is hot and very good looking, and Jenny couldn't keep her eyes of him.

I gave her dig in the ribs and whispered, “Jenny you are staring at him and close your mouth.”

She looked at me and whispered back “He is gorgeous!”

Billy then held out his hand for Jenny to shake and said, “Hello Jenny, I have seen you around in the playground and have never been game to come up and talk to you. It's nice to meet you.”

Jenny just whispered, “Yeah, me too.”

Ricky and I had to have a small laugh, but stopped when we realised that we were embarrassing them both. So it looks like we both have a boy friend now.

Tom Croft and Margaret came to talk with me and asked me how I am going at school and also how my gender thing is progressing and they both said how anyone could have ever thought I was a boy beggars belief. Then they went and talked with Mummy, Daddy, and Rodney and I was told later that Rodney and Tom had formed a company to have an air charter business in Quilpie. So it looks like any future trips to Brisbane will be made by air, which will cut the travelling time down to about two and a half hours.

Ricky, Jenny, Billy and I sat together for the rest of the evening and chatted about school and when summer comes and how we can all go swimming together.

Jenny and I went to the toilet together and she said, “Wow Carla, I can't seem to keep my eyes off Billy, he is hot!!”

“Yeah Jenny, I noticed, but you have to stop staring at him or he will get scared of you”. That put us into a fit of giggles till we got back out to where the boys were sitting and Ricky said, “What's so funny?”

Jenny said, “It's a girl thing Ricky, you wouldn't understand.”

Ricky replied, “Got that right.”

Helen came over to us and said, “Ricky and Billy we will be going in a few minutes so you had better say goodbye to the girls now ok?”

We went outside to where the cars are parked and I had a quick cuddle and a kiss with Ricky and there was that tremble in my chest again and Ricky jumped and said, “That sister of yours is a mighty fine kisser, Carla. Tell her thanks.”

Billy looked at Jenny and said, “What was that all about?”

Jenny said “We cant tell you yet but maybe one day.”

He gave Jenny a quick kiss on the cheek before Helen could catch us kissing, but I think she waited for a while to let us do it anyway. She knows how close me and Ricky are and trusts us not to go any further.

We went back into the restaurant and people were all helping to clean up the place so it would be open for business the next morning. It was getting late when we finally got home and Jenny and I hit the sack and went to sleep dreaming of kissing boys.

To be continued.

Next time: Going to see Brad's Mum and going fishing on the river and performing CPR to save a life.

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