Fanfiction concept by Elizabeth Jean, Written by Elizabeth Jean in conjunction with Sleethr.

Thanks go to Djkauf for assistance in proofing and editing.

Speech in Na’vi “Italics.”
Speech in English “English.”
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Deep in the Hallelujah Mountains near the Hometree of the Ni'awve clan a predator stirs from its slumber, stretching its massive body it looks at its surroundings, quills flaring up around its enormous head. It can sense its prey somewhere to the North East, moving swiftly it begins its journey from the Valley of Thanator’s to hunt down its prey.

RDA Outpost two…

I sat awake for hours contemplating everything Alyara had told me of the RDA’s actions on Pandora, I realized my Dream hunt had shown me firsthand what the RDA had done. The tree that was destroyed was definitely the Omaticaya’s Hometree. The other group I saw was dressed differently though, I can only assume I was seeing the slaughter of the Anurai clan.

Although, technically Alyara was the enemy, the range of emotions that she showed while explaining the events surrounding the Omaticaya were undeniably real. I found I could not deny that her retelling was the whole unequivocal truth; I had seen it in her eyes. I had also witnessed it myself and had few doubts that my Dream hunt showed actual events.

Part of my mind was screaming that I was a soldier with a mission, but considering what I’d heard and seen I chose to ignore it. There was no way I would be party to what amounted to nothing more than Genocide. The Na’vi didn’t deserve to be slaughtered. Their lifestyle, while it occasionally involved hostility, was usually peaceful. They were not a greedy people, their whole way of life revolved around Ey’wa who provided all they needed.

Nothing like us humans, our greed taxes the poor while the rich get wealthier, so many people back on Earth live in slums, the streets are filled with waste and disease. The sad thing is we do nothing to fix it, mega corporations like the RDA practically control the governments; we allowed them to expand to become monopolies, and humanity is paying the price.

Worse they weren’t happy to just destroy Earth, no, they had to come and start destroying paradise here too. I joined the Marines to serve my country, and did it make a difference? No, and here I am to prove it, a hired killer paid to murder innocents, they may not be human but the Na’vi deserve to live free.

My family has a long history in the Marines going back as far as the First World War. I remember my grandfather telling me stories going back over 20 generations. He showed me archives of things that had occurred in all the major wars, death camps, work camps and worse, until now it’s always been just something that happened a couple of centuries ago, it meant nothing to me.

But being here now I can see history repeating itself, the RDA will kill the Na’vi without mercy, some they will keep as slaves to mine Unobtainium. They’ll use the resources of this planet until all that’s left is a wasteland. I shook my head, I couldn’t let that happen, I’ve been a puppet for too long. Tomorrow I’m going to tell Alyara the full truth of why I’m here, I only hope she doesn’t kill me until I help set things right.

Those were my last thoughts as I fell into a disturbing dream...

I see myself and I’m younger, maybe four, I’m looking in a mirror dressed in something of my mothers. I see my father’s angry face appear before me and watch horrified as he practically rips the clothes off my small frame and beats me with his belt.

Another dream I’m ten, I’m wearing one of my sisters dresses, I’m caught and beaten again. Fifteen and the same thing happens only I notice my fourteen year old sister was there, she was crying, screaming at dad to leave her big sister alone.

I shake myself awake confused, I don’t remember those things ever happening, why the hell did I have dreams like that, I can’t get my head around why I can’t remember that happening. My father was a good man, a good Marine, the thought of him attacking me makes no sense.

Were those dreams real? Was my growing comfort in this body something to do with my childhood? Had I suppressed my memories of those times? I honestly didn’t know. I do know that there are gaps in the memories I have of my childhood. If Jen was here I could ask her but she’s back on Earth, thank goodness. I shake my head to clear it. Looking at the next bunk I notice Alyara has already risen.

Still half asleep I get up to take a shower, I strip down and head into the wet room, I nearly trip myself up when I come face to face with Alyara as naked as the day she was born, her lithe frame dripping with water, god she’s beautiful, I can’t help but stare. I absently wonder if Na’vi bodies are able to blush as I feel my cheeks burning. Alyara seems to look me over too before continuing to wash as though my presence doesn’t bother her.

I’m pulled from my thoughts as she speaks “Good morning, Dreamwalker, are you well rested?”

I sigh finding myself upset that she’s back to calling me Dreamwalker again, “No I didn’t sleep well at all Alyara, and please call me Morgan,” At least it’s gender neutral I thought, not that that matters here.

She looks at me strangely for a moment, “How about Marali, or Mara for short? That is what your name translates into,”

I pondered for a moment, do I really want a female name, I shrugged, it didn’t matter, in fact I was strangely pleased that she had suggested it, “Either is fine,” I smiled at her as I began washing.

I noticed today I was much more comfortable in this body, it no longer felt as alien. I realize I should be upset but for some strange reason it doesn’t bother me. I wonder if the Dream hunt or last night’s dreams are causing my change in acceptance of this body. God, it had only been four days, what the hell will I feel in six months.

Alyara pulls me from my thoughts “Marali, Marali, Mara are you alright? You seem troubled.” Her features were full of concern, I wondered why she’d care, I’m an outsider, and she knows nothing about me.

I smiled grateful of her concern “Just busy thinking. I’ve got a lot on my mind.” It was true. It felt like the whole Pandora was weighing down on my shoulders, maybe I should eat that bullet now? I shook my head, killing myself would help no one.

Alyara turned off her shower and moved to begin drying “What troubles you, Mara?”

I considered how to respond, I didn’t want her angry at me but there’s no easy way to tell someone, ‘I was sent to help others kill your people,’ “I will talk about it while we eat breakfast, please be patient with me, I need you to understand that things have changed.” Damn right they’d changed, there was no way I could complete my orders now.

She nodded and began braiding the hair around her queue; I absently touched my own hair and realized the braiding had come undone. I Bit my lip “Could you braid mine? I have no idea how to do it.”

She looked up in surprise “How can you not know how to braid it? It was braided when I first saw you.”

“It was braided by someone else.” I got a sinking feeling her next comments would be awkward, and I was right.

“You are a human woman, I’ve seen human women braid their hair, and I do not understand how you cannot know how to do it.” Her face was awash with confusion.

God, she’s beautiful, while I didn’t want to tell her the ugly truth, she’d find out soon enough. Biting the bullet I decided to just be honest. “My human body is male.”

Her expression changes to what I can only describe as stunned, then disbelief, then to my chagrin she begins to laugh. She stops abruptly when she notices I’m not laughing. “I do not understand why are you female if your human self is male, I only sense a female spirit?”

I feel like I’ve just been struck in the face “F f female spirit?” I ask in alarm.

She looks at me, staring into my eyes before nodding. “Yes, you have a female spirit. Although I can see male aspects, the majority I see is female.”

I sat heavily on one of the benches. I had no idea how to respond to that. I wondered again if those dreams from last night were real, if they were had I suppressed my own nature to be the man my father wanted me to be, the soldier to continue the proud military history of our family. I remember I wanted to be a doctor when I was young, just like my mom. Wait, that’s it! I remember, I literally wanted to be just like my mother.

I felt lightheaded, the room was spinning, I was nauseous, not only was my purpose on Pandora a lie, so was the person that I have become, I felt myself pitch forward as the world turned on its side, I started to heave, bile filled my throat before I passed out. I hadn’t even heard Alyara calling my name.

Omaticaya village earlier…

Drewan checked the riding harness on his Ikran, he’d waiting until the sun was well and truly up before he started getting ready. He wanted to make sure he had proper light to check everything over, while not common, harnesses did break. Fortunately, Ikrans once bonded protected their riders, still he never took chances.

He’d packed food and water for his trip knowing he might be gone longer than a day. Eventually, with his supplies and weapons ready, he mounted his Ikran and took to the skies. His Ikran circled the village using the currents to gain altitude, with a quick mental nudge the Ikran banked and began heading north east.

Flying just above the canopy of the trees Drewan concentrated on looking for signs of his wayward hunter while his Ikran concentrated on flying. About an hour into the trip Drewan saw a shadow suddenly appear over him. He signaled his Ikran to dive into the dense forests. They flew through the trees at breakneck speed, trying desperately to keep ahead of the Taruk that was in pursuit. He muttered to himself wondering how the Olo'eyktan had ever managed to catch such a beast.

Flying through several smaller tree clusters in an effort to lose the beast finally worked, the Taruk eventually decided to give up the chase. Drewan sighed with relief and signaled his Ikran to land and rest, the chase had taken a lot out of them both. The Taruk hunted far and wide but since being bonded to the Olo'eyktan it seemed to linger around the Omaticaya. Drewan pondered this latest experience as his heart rate calmed and stopped pounding in his chest.

So far the Taruk had chased riders but never killed anyone, the Olo'eyktan seemed to think it was just playing a game he called tag. The children play a similar game, but it is very different when the game is being played by a predator with a twenty five metre wingspan, and can swallow a Na’vi warrior in a single bite. Considering it hasn’t killed anyone since the Olo'eyktan became its rider can only encourage the idea that it’s playing. Still he’d found it an unnerving experience to be chased first hand.

Drewan shook his head and dismounted his Ikran, deciding to wait another hour before risking taking flight again.

RDA Outpost two…

Seeing Marali being sick and fainting shook me up, I gathered her in my arms and pulled her under the water to wash away the sick. I couldn’t fully understand what had happened, she seemed fine but suddenly seemed to go into shock from my words, truly Marali is a strange one, yet I find myself drawn to her. Ey’wa guided me to find Marali, Ey’wa never guides without reason, I suspect I know why.

After washing her again I manage to dry her, I braid her hair around her queue like she asked, I wasn’t sure how to put her into the human clothes so I dressed her in one of the spare sets I carry. By Ey’wa, she’s beautiful while asleep, she’s beautiful while awake too, but awake she seems in constant turmoil, maybe she is male as she says but I don’t sense it.

I carry her to her bed and lay her down, I sit and watch as she sleeps, I sing to her and pray Ey’wa will help calm her spirit.

After a while I decide she will be hungry when she wakes. I head outside to prepare, last night I had stored the meat from my recent hunt, and it would need to be finished today. Some I would smoke to preserve it, the rest I would prepare for our morning meal, Marali had shown me the human food stores. I do not understand why she would eat such things.

The dried fruits and nuts were different and tasted quite nice, but other things were to put it bluntly, disgusting. I needed some items from the forest, picking up my weapons I climbed the fence, once on the other side I swiftly began gathering berries, leaves, vines and fruits. Marali would learn of Na’vi foods today. Hopefully she will enjoy Na’vi food better.

As I worked I considered all that I knew of Marali. Obviously, she is a Dreamwalker sent by the humans, I suspect the humans think the Na’vi won’t discover their plans until it is too late, Marali said her human body is male, I blinked as a thought came to me. By Ey’wa, if what I suspect is going on, the humans again prove they know nothing of the Na’vi. I wonder if they fear their Dreamwalkers might fall in love with Na’vi like Jake did with Neytiri.

If so they obviously do not realize Na’vi have no boundaries when it comes to love. Some male warriors will quite happily bond with another male if they find attraction, similarly a woman may chose another woman to bond with, the bonded pair may have other lovers to provide children but they will always be one with their bonded mate. The Na’vi are not as close minded as some humans seem to be.

If all Dreamwalker’s are in the opposite physical sex in an effort to prevent them from falling in love, they may find their plans backfire. I suspect Marali isn’t the only Dreamwalker here, how many more I could not guess, many will not be like Marali. I feel Ey’wa sent me to help her understand herself, maybe find the inner peace I know she’s been searching for. It did not take long to find what I needed, before long I made my way back and began the preparation.

An hour later I heard Marali begin to stir, entering the sleeping hut I found her sitting looking down at the clothes I’d dressed her in with a confused expression. She looked up as I entered an unasked question on her lips. For some strange reason I couldn’t help but blurt it all out.

“I am glad to see you are awake again Marali, I was worried when you collapsed. I’m sorry but I had to wash you again and I wasn’t sure how to dress you in human clothes, I have a few spares that I carry just in case so I put you in something I was familiar with. You can just change if you’re uncomfortable.”

For some reason I felt really nervous, my insides fluttered like I was filled with a flock of fkio (Tetrapteron).

Drewan had spent the last hour recovering from his near miss with the Taruk, while resting he’d fed his Ikran before eating some dried fruits, now it was time to continue his search. He climbed on and in seconds his Ikran broke through the canopy into clear skies.

His Ikran began heading north east again while Drewan scanned what ground he could see. He estimated another hour before he reached the human settlement.

RDA Outpost two…

I awoke feeling strange, I remember seeing memories I’d buried long ago, repressed for the sake of my father and my health. It’s strange for years I had managed to bury those feelings, yet now ironically since my Dream hunt, Pandora’s Box has literally been opened and I have no idea how to close it, for that matter, do I even want to.

I sat up and found my clothes felt weird, looking down I blinked in confusion, I was dressed like Alyara does, as a Na’vi, Surprisingly the clothes felt comfortable. I heard a noise and looked up to see a concerned Alyara walk in. I wanted to ask why I was wearing Na’vi clothes but Alyara beat me to it.

“I am glad to see you are awake again Mara, I was worried when you collapsed, I’m sorry but I had to wash you again and I wasn’t sure how to dress you in human clothes, I have a few spares that I carry just in case so I put you in something I was familiar with. You can just change if you’re uncomfortable.”

It came out in a rush, like she was worried I’d be upset, I could have laughed at how nervous she seemed as she stood there waiting for my response.

“Calm down Aly.” I grinned, if she could shorten my name so could I.

She looked confused “Aly?”

“Hey, if I’m Mara then it’s only fair you’re Aly.”

Alyara grinned back at me.

“As for the clothes they are actually more comfortable than my own, so if you don’t mind I’ll stay as I am.”

Alyara’s smile lit up the room, “If you feel up to it I’ve prepared a meal.” I nodded as she took my hand and led me outside.

Her hand touching mine felt like a circuit breaker had been thrown between us, I swear she could feel it too as her smile seemed to get bigger.

We settled and began to eat, I thought corned beef was good but compared to the meal Alyara had made it was like sawdust being compared to a melon. I’m pretty sure I moaned when I took my first bite of the nikt'chey (food wrap) it contained meat, vegetables, seeds, spices, and fruits, I’m not sure where she got all the ingredients from but they were mouth wateringly good. Alyara told me that food wraps are a traditional meal for the Na’vi, each clan has their own unique combinations. It was a whole lot better than the food I’d been eating up until now.

After we’d eaten I decided I needed to come clean about my mission here, there was no sense in putting it off. I only hoped she’d still like me after my confession.

“Aly, about why I’m here, before I tell you what’s happening I need you to know, meeting you, undergoing the Dream hunt has changed everything.”

She nodded, “I’ve already figure you were here to invade our home again.”

I stared at her dumbstruck, shaking my head, I continued, “You’re right, I was sent her to take back the Hell’s gate site so the RDA could continue to mine. However, I was led to believe your people had attacked the RDA unprovoked.”

“That’s a lie!” she stood up, her face like thunder “They attacked us, we were happy to share.”

I held up my hands to calm her, “I know that now, I suspected as much but as that news was only rumor back home; I couldn’t be sure until I met you. Now I realize the RDA were using me and others to exterminate the Na’vi.” I could see her anger growing.

“Hey, hey Aly, I’m not going to hurt the Na’vi, I don’t agree with them,” her expression softened.

She looked at me with curiosity, “So what are you going to do now?”

“The RDA have dropped a few hundred Avatar drivers here, their primary mission is to take back Hell’s gate and create a safe zone for more forces. Their secondary mission is to take back any RDA outposts or destroy them. I’m going to help you stop them.”

Alyara flung herself at me, her lips found mine and my eyes widened; of all the reactions I’d expected this wasn’t even on the list. Not that I was complaining, it’s just that it just came as a complete shock. After a minute or two she sat back seemingly flustered, I wasn’t sure, blue really doesn’t convey blushing very well.

“Sorry, it’s just I knew when Ey’wa guided me to follow you, I knew you were special. Ey’wa has shown repeatedly that there is something important for you to do and that I was to help you.”

I looked at her stunned. I don’t think I’m special, before I could ponder further Alyara continued.

“Mara, about before, in the washing room, we need to talk about it, I can sense you’re trying to ignore the problem, but that will only make it worse. I’m worried, ignoring it will hurt you, I’ve only known you a short time but I want to know you more. I believe Ey’wa sent me to you to help you to become all you need to be for yourself and others.”

I sighed in resignation, she was right I have been ignoring the problem, mainly because I really don’t understand it, I’m confused as hell. The Dream hunt I could cope with, it was my own childhood memories that are confusing me, hearing Alyara telling me I have a female spirit, coupled with my dreams last night unlocked a slew of memories I had locked away deep in my subconscious.

From an early age I found myself drawn to girls, the way they dressed the things they played. I was jealous that I couldn’t join in their games. The first time I was caught dressed in my mother’s clothes I was caught by my mother, she just laughed and tried to explain why boys don’t dress like girls. Despite that I found myself dressing in secret whenever I could.

The times my father caught me were when he was on leave, he was ashamed that his son was a sissy. It’s amazing people have known about gender identity disorders for centuries, but some people still refuse to accept it’s a real medical problem. Roughnecks are the most intolerant group, especially when family is involved.

From the age of ten I’d join my sister playing dress up and having tea parties, that is except for the times dad would suddenly get leave and catch me. I remember clearly my sister crying on several occasions that dad caught me. I locked who I was away; I stopped talking to my sister except for basic pleasantries. I think I remember my sister screaming at dad on day about killing her sister.

I shook my head, locking away who I am, who I needed to be, it’s probably what made me a good Marine and kept me alive. For years I threw myself into being the best Marine I could be, on the battlefield I was an emotionless killer. Off the battlefield I was just as emotionless, throwing myself into training. My life was the corps, the corps was my life.

Looking back I can see clearly that I was hollow, my life meaningless, I took stupid risks, even taking this mission was a stupid risk. Now I’m wondering if I was trying to get myself killed, maybe subconsciously I was trying to end my emotionless pain. I look up and see Alyara watching me, concern clearly visible in her features.

I smile, tears drip from my chin as I realize the RDA has given me an opportunity to be myself, even if I’m a three metre tall alien, I’m female, maybe my life’s not over, maybe, just maybe, it’s just begun. Looking into Alyara’s eyes I admit, things are going to be different, maybe confused for a while, but if Alyara is with me, I might just be alright.

Alyara smiles brightly, as if she can sense my feelings, “you have found yourself?”

I nod and return her smile “Yes, I am Marali.” As frightening as my confession is, it’s a truth I can longer fight. It feels like a weight I hadn’t realized I was carrying has been removed.

Alyara’s smile gets even brighter as she hugs me, eventually we disengage.“Come, we should gather something’s to eat, I will begin teach you to our ways to hunt.”

I nodded, “Let me just get my weapons,”

She looked at me and nodded, “Okay, but I will be teaching you to hunt with a bow,”

I had hoped to use my AVR M30 but nodded, I’d bring the M30 for protection anyway. I quickly strapped on my sidearm and picked up the M30, I double checked they were loaded and the safety was on with both. I followed Alyara over the fence and into the jungle.

Alyara started collecting different roots and fruits, telling me what she was collecting and its uses. I kept watch for predators, Pandora was full of them and I didn’t want to get caught off guard. It amazed me to realize this was where Alyara had gathered breakfast earlier. As we moved through the jungle I was awed by Alyara’s knowledge of the plants surrounding us.

Eventually we came to a clearing where several Yerik (hexapede) were grazing, I slung my M30 over my shoulder quietly as I could, Alyara began to teach me how to use a bow the way her people do, she makes it look so easy and laughs lightly at my pathetic attempts to hold the correct stance and draw an arrow. Eventually I get my stance right and carefully take aim.

I’m fascinated as Alyara quietly sings while I prepare to take my shot, releasing my arrow I watch with baited breath as it flows through the air, my arrow is on target and the Yerik goes down. We run to it and I see my shot wasn’t quite fatal, I’m enthralled as Alyara prays to Ey’wa and thanks the Yerik for the gifts its death will bring, she quickly ends its pain.

She stands up and looks down at the Yerik, “You did well Marali, remember to aim a little more towards the chest,” She smiles at me and I can’t help but hope I get to see her smiles for a long time to come.

Alyara has just turned to begin to prepare the dead animal to be moved when I see a shadow engulf us, without think I push Alyara out the way and roll myself just in time to avoid being skewered by a spear, as I roll to my feet I turn to find a Na’vi male jumping off a Banshee and pulling a knife. Before he can attack I hear Alyara.

“No, Drewan, she’s a friend.” Drewan, I remember him, he was leading Alyara’s hunting party.

Alyara’s in front of me in a heartbeat, Drewan looks torn.

“Alyara, you were to observe only, not make friends with the enemy, you know how dangerous the humans and Dreamwalkers are.” He takes a step forward.

Alyara holds her ground, “Ey’wa wanted me to help Marali, there were several signs, Drewan.”

Drewan snorted, “Alyara I have always in the past trusted your instincts with Ey’wa, but this is a Dreamwalker, probably sent by the humans to k….” Drewan trailed of as a Thanator roared as it leaped into the clearing near Drewan.

My mouth hung open, I wasn’t sure how but it was the same Thanator from my Dream hunt, how this was possible I didn’t know, yet here it was in flesh and blood looking ready to pounce on Drewan any second. I ran round Alyara and sprinted over to stand in front of Drewan. I stare at the Thanator my arms open, waiting for death.

The Thanator stares back, I refused to flinch as it roared again, I felt Alyara trying to pull me away to safety, I stubbornly refused to budge, several tense minutes went by as we both stared at each other, eventually the Thanator seemed to nod, it turned to its side and looked over its massive shoulder, the scene so reminiscent of my Dream hunt I nearly laughed, reaching for my queue. I realized with a smile that Alyara had braided it for me.

I reached up for the Thanator’s queue and gently held them together. I stumbled slightly as the intensity of the connection hits me, I felt the Thanator’s memories more than saw them, I knew the Thanator had felt mine too. I could feel his muscles flexing as he stood waiting patiently. Bakteyo, his name is Bakteyo, I could sense he was pleased with the name I’d come up with.

I climbed up behind his powerful shoulders; I turned to look at Alyara offering my hand. She stared for a moment before turning her head to Drewan.

“Drewan, will you take our kill back to the human settlement, we’ll be there shortly to explain everything. After seeing a Palulukan come to protect Marali, do you still doubt Ey’wa’s will? If I am not mistaken it is the same one from her Dream hunt.” With that Alyara accepted my hand up.

Drewan looked stunned, “You performed the rite of passage?”

Alyara looked over to Drewan with a smile, “No, Ey’wa did, had I not seen it with my own eyes I would have found it hard to believe, we will join you shortly at the settlement.”

Drewan nodded still in shock as Bakteyo began to run north.

I've posted a day early as I will be away this weekend visiting my parents, I didn't want you to have to wait until Monday for this chapter. Yes I know I'm nice like that :)

Kudos are very welcome but please also leave comments if you can, feedback can help shape new ideas and can encourage an Author. I'm still holding out hope some more writers will join in. I hope you've enjoyed this chapter, more next week :)

Big hugs Lizzie :)

Please not the original Avatar story is property of James Cameron and his affiliates, this story isn't written for profit just my own enjoyment and hopefully the enjoyment of others.

http://james-camerons-avatar.wikia.com/wiki/Hometree_Songs