The Pink Hoover - Part 2

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Rona’s comment about me needing a housekeeper was like a punch in the gut. She hadn't passed even the slightest derogatory comment on the frankly tatty state of my home, but instead, she had suggested a solution. That’s what she was all about… Solutions to problems and sometimes the people on the receiving end didn’t know that they had a problem.

“I don’t know.”

She smiled back at me while expertly caramelising the onions.

“Lucia is a wonderful person if a little eccentric at times. There is not a bad bone in her body which had led for some men to try to take advantage of her in the past. You are not like that.”

Her closing words were again right on point. I would not like to get on the wrong side of Rona.

“Be a dear and lay the table. This will be ready in five minutes.”

My guest was ordering me about in my home. To be honest, I didn’t care. Rona was the first woman to have crossed the threshold since my then wife Janice had walked out on me and into the bed of a real sleazebag named Jeremy Thornton. He was a 'cash flasher' who never bought a round.

It took Janice exactly seventeen days to see him for what he was and wanted to come back, but for once, I stood up to her and told her to her face 'to sling her hook'. My reasoning was that if she could leave me for such a turd then how long before she found someone not so much of a shithead? I was not going to get fooled again.

We were divorced not long after that, and since then, I've not really looked at another woman in that way. Rona was someone that I treated as an equal. Well, she was a good deal older than me and not my type… whatever that was.

I laid the table and poured her another glass of wine. She would not be driving home or wherever tonight.

Rona, served up an excellent Onion Soup with all the trimmings. That was followed by a stuffed Mackerel and an Italian Salad. That lady can sure cook. It made my ‘fling it all in a pot’ cooking methods seem so amateurish by comparison.

“That was an excellent meal, Rona. Thank you for that. I didn’t deserve such a treat.”

“It was my pleasure. I don’t often get the chance to cook for someone, so thank you for letting me do that.”

I raised a glass. Together, we toasted the end of a good meal.

Once I'd cleared away and put at least some of the dirty dishes into the dishwasher, I sat down. It was time for work.


We broke off our session just before eleven that evening.
“Please stay the night. Four glasses of that excellent Claret would put you well over the limit. I have made up a bed for you. How about it?”

She looked at her watch and sighed.
“I think that you are right. Thanks. I’ll be away first thing in the morning. Please give some thought to at least interviewing Lucia. If you two don’t click then there is nothing lost is there?”

“I suppose so.”

“One thing. She has a dog. Some sort of terrier mongrel. Scamp is her name. She dotes on her. If you aren’t happy with that then the deal is off.”

I had never had a dog either as a child or as an adult.
“Or if Scamp hates me?”

Rona laughed.
“Indeed.”

She looked me right in the eye.
“Let’s see how this takeover pans out before doing anything with regard to Lucia. She’s in Italy at the moment and as far as I know, won’t be back until late October. However, I think the two of you would get on very well.”

“Thank you Rona, for giving me an out until more pressing things have resolved themselves.”

“I want both of us to come out of this smelling of roses. With what we did with regard to your company structure will make you, and all those who depend upon you happy should the right offer drop in our laps. The emphasis is naturally on it being the ‘right offer’. Anything less than that and we walk away.”

I smiled. Rona's version of 'benevolent capitalism' was very much the same as mine. That was why we'd clicked so well. Those changes allowed me, and to some extent Rona herself to examine all aspects of the current and future bid with a clear conscience, when it came to my employees. Almost all the employees who had been with the company for more than a year took advantage of the share ownership scheme that we’d devised.

“As I said, I’ll be out of here first thing. I have a meeting in Nottingham for eleven but after that, I’m free for the rest of the day. I’ll draft the email that you should send, provided you agree with the wording late on Friday afternoon.”

“Yeah, and if Toby sleazebag calls, I will tell him that the offer is being examined by my legal representatives. That is true as I sent them a copy before I left the office today.”

She smiled.
“You are learning Anthony. We could make a proper egomaniacal capitalist out of you yet!”

I smiled back at her.
“No chance.”


I was up before Rona the following morning. Getting up at the crack of dawn is nothing out of the ordinary. The hours before 09:00 where when I felt that I did my best work. Little or no chance of being interrupted. Today was a little different. I’d had the night to think about Rona’s suggestion of a housekeeper.

I had to admit no myself that I had not even looked into one before because I didn’t want some stranger poking their fingers into my whole home life. If Lucia came with Rona’s recommendation, then that might be different. If it meant that I had to make a short trip to Italy to interview her, then so be it. At least that was one thing that I could make some progress on while the lawyers and accountants spent lots of money telling me that in its current state, the bid was an insult and one that would not be taken seriously unless it was totally revised.

I had toast, tea and coffee ready to go when Rona appeared.

“You didn’t need to have done any of this,” she remarked.

“You are a guest in my house besides, I’ll have to move my car to let you leave. I didn’t think about that last night.”

She smiled.
“Tea and some toast would be fine if that is local Honey I see on the table?”

“It is. The apiarist lives just a few miles down the road. This is one was made with mostly rapeseed pollen,” I said as I switched the kettle on and put a slice of bread into the toaster.

“Sounds good.”

I had already learned that Rona was not into small talk and general chatter.

While the tea brewed, I took my chance.
“I have been thinking and you are right, I do need a housekeeper. Naturally, I would like to meet Lucia first. It we don’t get on then it would be better to find out sooner rather than later.”

“Good for you. I’ll speak to her and we can set something up.”

“I don’t do video interviews. I find them so impersonal and you can’t get a feel for the person if you know what I mean?”

“Just like me then. I like to see the whole person, not a talking head. That’s why I wanted to meet you before we got anything going.”

“I know and I appreciate that.”
Then I added,
“You mentioned that Lucia is in Italy at the present time. If I have to go there on a day trip then I’ll do it. It is not as if I am heavily involved in the deal at the moment. The Lawyers and Accountants… bless their cotton socks are doing their thing despite it being a crap offer.”

Rona smiled.
“I knew that we could work together before we first met and nothing that has transpired since has caused me to change that. I’ll see how she is fixed.”

I smiled at Rona.
“Besides, if the opposition are keeping tabs on me, then a day trip to say Rome will no doubt cause some confusion.”

Rona drank some of her tea and nodded her head.
“You are learning fast. It is too bad that you won’t be in a position to have another company like you have now for several years. What you learn this time may well go to waste.”

I was beginning to understand how Rona operated. This whole thing was a game of chess with feints and sacrifices along the way with the aim of coming out on top at the end of the day.


I went into work in good spirits. That only lasted until just before lunchtime when my former wife, Jessica, burst into my office while I was in the middle of our weekly production review meeting.

“I understand that you are selling the company! I want my share!”

My team looked a bit puzzled. She noticed this.
“And the bastard has not told you yet. Typical…”

“Hello my former wife. As for your share, I seem to remember a credit card bill for almost four grand that you didn’t put on your financial statement in the divorce. That is illegal. Any judge would see that as a way of disqualifying you from any proceeds of a sale should one take place. At the moment there is nothing worth talking about on the table so it is pure speculation to even talk about a sale. I am working on next year’s financial plan right now. If I had wanted to sell, would I be doing that? The answer is a big fat no.”

Two of my team knew that was the truth. We’d been working on expanding the production for the next year for the past three weeks. I’d even been to see the bank and they were generally supportive.

“David, can you escort my former wife off the premises. Once that is done, can you come back here. I want everyone to know what has transpired to date at the same time.”

David Merchant was my production manager. He guessed that I wanted to brief my team before I addressed the workforce. The appearance of my former wife had made that briefing something that could not wait.

He disappeared with him holding my dear ex-wife by the arm and returned a few minutes later.
“She’s gone but is not very happy at being rebuffed like that,” said David.

I nodded back at him.

“Someone somewhere and probably in London, has been talking so I will give it to you guys straight. I’ll tell everyone after lunch, so if you can all hold fire about saying anything until then I would appreciate it?”

There were no dissenters.

“It is true that I have received an unsolicited bid for the company. I want to stress the word ‘unsolicited’. I have not put the company up for sale, nor have I put out any feelers regarding a sale or even undertaking in any re-financing. The bid that I have received is frankly derisory, and I have told them so and in polite words, that they should sling their hook. This business is not for sale.”

“That said, I think that it in the best interests of everyone and that means all of you to prepare a defence. What I have done is engage the services of a consultant to advise me on the bid, and how to fight it. The expenses for that are coming out of my pocket. Therefore, it will never appear on the balance sheet or in the books, so don’t go looking for it. My immediate problem is that I do not know who is behind this bid. The people behind it are using the services of a slimeball consultant of their own. Since the initial contact, I have discovered that this person is regarded with contempt in the city of London.”

“To re-iterate, and as I stand here today, I have no intention of selling the company. In other news, I have decided to employ a housekeeper and I should be interviewing one or two in the next few weeks.”

It took a few seconds for my last words to sink in. My team went off to lunch happy.

I was far from happy. I needed to speak to Rona ASAP.


Rona was not surprised by what had happened.
“Toby is renowned for dirty tricks. You had better send an email off to your lawyer stating what happened. He can make sure that he has the legal paperwork ready to go should she take the claim further.”

“That’s what I was thinking,” I said agreeing with her.
“The financial settlement my wife and I agreed to and signed specifically excludes any and all future growth in the company. That is the one thing about the whole thing that earned my divorce lawyer his fees. I think that a letter from our company lawyers to her reminding her of this would be in order?”

“Good for you. So many people like you forget the bit about future growth.”

“I only did it at the insistence of my divorce lawyer, but I am so glad to have done it. If she wants to go against it then she will have to fund the whole thing. There is no way that I’m going to pay her again. The last time, it was only thanks to a new order at work that I was able to borrow the money to pay her in time. I had to put up my home as collateral for that loan. I am not going to do that again.”

Rona changed the subject.
“Now that they are at least a bit out in the open, we can ask for a full disclosure as to who it behind the bid. I’ll redraft the rejection letter and send it to you for approval by the end of the day. We need to put the ball back in their court ASAP.”

“I agree. I wonder how long it will be before I have to explain how a sale would affect the staff?”

“That is one thing that you are not going to do before the deal is done and dusted and money has changed hands. That is between us and your staff and must stay in the dark until then.”

I remembered Rona lecturing me on that very thing when we set up the restructuring.
“Sorry, but I do need them to keep the business running while I can deal with the bid.”

“Wrong. That’s what I’m here for isn’t it? That’s how I earn my money in the event of a sale. No sale, no fat fee but haven’t I always been perfectly clear that the final say is down to you and you alone. I’m here to take the strain off you while you keep the company solvent.”

“You are and sorry for doubting you.”

“Don’t think anything of it. It is my job to be right there for you on this.”


Rona sent me an email just before midnight as she promised. This one was very direct and to the point. The prospective bidders were instructed to value the company correctly. She emphasised this by repeating herself that the people behind the deal need to come forward and make themselves known. Her final words got it right.”

“Henceforth, we will entertain no communication with Toby Youngman.”

I forwarded it to my company lawyers and went to bed.


I don’t know when Rona actually slept, but there was another email waiting for me when I got up the next morning.

“Anthony, I have spoken with Lucia and she’d be happy to meet you on Saturday in Cannes at 14:00. She will be waiting in the foyer at the Hotel Majestic under the name, ‘Lucia Lambretti’. She is copied in on this email. From here on, just talk to her directly. Good luck. Rona.”

She had included all of Lucia’s contact details including her Facebook page.

Normally, I’m not one for Social-Media but I felt that it would not harm things to look at her personal bio.

To say that it was a surprise would be a huge underestimate. I was so engrossed in her very chequered history that I missed a call from work wondering where I was for my 09:00 meeting.

I finally surfaced just before 10:00. Feeling very guilty, I called Sue at the office and said that I’d been up very late the previous night which was perfectly true, and that I’d be in before 11:00.


I fobbed off everyone at work with my ‘up all night excuse’. It wasn’t a total fabrication and that it was nothing to do with the bid for the company.

“I have sent our response to the legal people. The advisor that I engaged and I were working on that until well after midnight. Once they have vetted it, it will be sent to the company fronting the bid. As far as I’m concerned, the company is not for sale. End of story,” I told Sue hoping to sound duly serious.

Once I’d dealt with company matters, I looked into how I’d get to Cannes on Saturday without letting anyone else know where I was going especially my assistant, Sue. It was not going to be easy. No matter how I rolled the dice. Living in the middle of nowhere as I did, meant that travel anywhere was more often than not, a real PITA. Eventually, I decided on a Friday afternoon train to Manchester Airport and an evening flight to Frankfurt. After a few hours in an hotel at the airport would see me getting a flight to Nice. The return flight would be later that afternoon would be direct to London, then four different trains would see me home late that evening.

Normally, I’d get my assistant to book everything, but on this occasion, I wanted to keep things quiet. I used my personal credit card and by four, I had the almost all the trip booked. Then I went into the outer office.

“I’m going over to Manchester on Friday afternoon. I need to talk to the consultant that I engaged about the bid and they can only make it early in the evening after they get back from Germany. Can you book me a return train ticket from Cleethorpes to Manchester Piccadilly for say three on Friday?”

Sue is a kind soul but the look on her face told me that she didn’t believe a word of it.

“Don’t worry Sue, I’m not going to sell the company out from under us. Their opening bid is frankly derisory. Here, take a look for yourself.”

I waited while she looked at the first page of the bid.

“Ok, that I do believe, but there is something that you are not telling me.”

She had me there.

“There is and if it all goes well, then I’ll have something to say on Monday but it won’t be for general consumption.”

Sue looked at me over the top of her glasses. I got the message loud and clear… You had better do that or else!


At 15:39 on Friday, I caught the train that would take me to Manchester Airport. I carried just my briefcase. A clean pair of socks and undies were in the briefcase along with my toothbrush, deodorant and razor. I’d booked a ticket for the extension to the Airport online. If anyone was following me, then I hoped that they’d think that I was going to see our company accountants who were located near Piccadilly Station. I hoped that my subterfuge would work.


My flight from Frankfurt arrived in Nice just before midday. I debated about taking a taxi but I had plenty of time before our meeting so I opted to use the airport bus into Cannes. It dropped me off at the Palais des Expositions, where the famous film festival is held. I walked the short distance from there to the Hotel Majestic. If Lucia could afford their room rates, then I had to wonder what was in it for her should she come to work for me.

Seeing her sitting there waiting for me with Scamp at her feet made me fall madly in love with her. I had to bite my lip, my cheek and tongue all at once to quell the reaction. She was effing beautiful, and was busy repelling some obvious gigolos’ as I watched and waited. Scamp would growl at the men and they’d take the hint and back off.

In a few seconds, I’d find out if I had the ‘Scamp seal of approval’.

“Lucia, I gather that you were expecting me?”

She smiled back at me. More lip biting eschewed.

“Anthony… You are right on time. I like that in a man.”

She stood up and kissed me Italian Style on both cheeks. I felt myself going red in the face.

“Come, I have reserved us a place in a divine restaurant that is just around the corner.”

She was clearly in charge as she took my arm in hers to tell the rivals that she was with her man at least for the time being. Scamp hadn’t growled at me… yet.

We left the richness of the hotel and headed three streets away from the beach to a small restaurant where Lucia was welcomed as if she was one of the family. All sorts of questions were whizzing around in my mind but uppermost, was ‘Why me?’

I felt at a loss as Lucia ordered in what I took to be perfect French. I was pretty dumb when it came to any language other than English.

As we waited for our food, I asked,
“How do you know Rona?”

Lucia smiled.
“She helped me unwind my late husbands’ affairs after his sudden death. He died while racing a vintage Porsche at Le Mans. It had a tyre burst on the Mulsane Straight. From the reports, it was quick which is a blessing. I loved him dearly, but he loved racing old cars more than me. I knew that before we were married, but I hoped that in time he’d change. He didn’t…”

That simple answer told me a lot about her… only more questions but she carried on.

“I met him when my little Fiat 500 had broken down in Tuscany. Along the road comes this pure white Gull-wing Mercedes and out he stepped in his pristine white overalls. My knight in white armour had arrived. He fixed the car by the side of the road in next to no time. Then he invited me to dinner in at his place in San Gimignano. He proposed to me the next morning as we walked through Sienna. I said yes at first, just to get out of the area, but I soon fell in love with him. We were married in Oxford seven weeks to the day later. Then he goes and dies on me but the years we were together were fantastic.”
She looked sad, but forced herself to go on.

“His affairs were all over the place. We’d been married for five years, and while I knew that he was wealthy I had no idea about where the money came from and to be honest, I did not care. Some of it was old family money, but most was down to some very shrewd investments in old cars and planes. I was introduced to Rona by a mutual friend. She knew of my husband by reputation and agreed to help me out. She took his businesses apart, and with a new accountant found some big tax liabilities as well as investments that had very few records associated with them. He left me pretty well off so I guess that one of the questions you have is why would I want to come and work for you? You aren’t rich and famous nor do you have a lot of money yet.”

She smiled at me. My heart stopped for a second.

“The answer is that I’m done with the rich and famous. I was not born into money, and those that were see me as a meal ticket to increasing their own wealth thanks to my late husband. I can be your housekeeper and remain out of the spotlight. Rona told me that your business is in Grimsby. I had to look at a map to find it. Rona also said that you were a special sort of person. That is good enough a recommendation for me to want to meet you so here we are.”

Her answers had temporarily left me speechless.

“Lucia, I would love to have you come and work for me, but there is so much that I wanted to ask but now that I am sitting here on the other side of the table from you I can’t think of any of them.”

She laughed. Her light olive skin and perfect white teeth once again made my heart stop for a moment.

“Why don’t we give it a try? Why not pay me twelve thousand a year for a three months trial. After that time, we can review our relationship. As I said, I’m not doing this for the money but more as a favour to Rona. I owe her big time and… well this will go some way towards settling that debt. Do we have a deal?”

There was nothing more to say but,
“Yes. When can you start?”

“Next Saturday. Rona has already given me your address. I can be there about lunchtime. I have a few loose ends to tie up over the border in Italy. Then Scamp and I will travel to England. She is all vaccinated so she won’t have to go into quarantine.”

I admired her positivity. It was almost as if she had decided to come to work for me before I even travelled to France. I guessed that I had Rona to thank for that.


The hour and a half that it took us to have a simple lunch flew by. We talked as equals and not like a first date where one side is out to impress the other in the hope of getting a second date nor was it like employer and employee. It had been a long time since I’d had a conversation like that.

I paid the bill and as we left the restaurant, I said,
“Let me walk you back to your hotel?”

She laughed.
“I only chose that monstrosity as a place that was easy for you to find. I came into Cannes by train. I’m staying with a friend just along the coast from Portofino in Italy.”

I hoped that I didn’t show just how relieved I was.

“Then let me walk you to the station. I can get a taxi to the airport from there.”

She smiled and took my arm in hers. There was no doubt that Lucia was in charge and I didn’t mind a bit.

When we arrived at the station, we saw that a train to the Italian border at Ventimiglia would be arriving in three minutes.

Lucia said,
“Why don’t I leave you with something to remember me by for one week?”

Without waiting for an answer, she wrapped her arms around me and we kissed.

We kissed until the station announcer said that the train was pulling into the platform.

A slightly breathless Lucia said,
“See you next Saturday.”

Then she was gone. I found myself standing in the middle of the booking hall grinning like a Cheshire cat.

[to be continued]

[Authors Note]
I'm posting this early as I need to make an early start tomorrow. I'm back in Trondheim but at a different hotel from last year where I got the inspiration for this story. Tomorrow, I'm riding up to Moi-I-Rana which is just south of the Arctic Circle. 290 odd miles on the E6 highway.

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Comments

It will be interesting

Wendy Jean's picture

To find out the real motives behind trying to keep her down.

Nice but

This is a very nice story but not the one that is named in the title.

I'm confused

Patricia Marie Allen's picture

I read Pink Hoover Part 1 and now here's Pink Hoover Part 2. Pink Hoover Part 2 doesn't follow the same story. However, I did read the story it does follow. This seems to be a continuation of the Roberta Galbraith series. I'm interested in reading more of that story as well. But I wasn't expecting to find it under the Pink Hoover umbrella. Are the two stories related?

Hugs
Patricia

Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt

I’m even more confused

Because this is definitely the part two to the part one that I read last week!
Bring in Shirley Holmes to investigate, when the impossible has been eliminated, what remains must be the truth! (Or something like that!)
I always enjoy a good mystery!
Stay safe
T

I'm With Patricia

joannebarbarella's picture

While I'm happy to see Roberta Galbraith again this does seem to be a totally different story to the one begun in Part 1 of The Pink Hoover.

Now, I'm greedy and I want both stories to continue but, please, let's have them properly identified.

I'm with you

Patricia Marie Allen's picture

I want both stories to continue. At least the real Pink Hoover Part 2 is here in this place an we've had a preview of the next installment in the Roberta Galbraith series.

Hugs
Patricia

Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt

The Scum of Humanity Floats to the Top

BarbieLee's picture

It's not always the best person for the job who makes team leader but the one who did the best at sucking up, skewing the reports, and taking the credit for the exception work others have done. Samantha tosses a lot of real life into her stories is what makes them so good besides her excellent writing skills. If one has lived long enough it's a good bet they have met most of the characters in this story, even if by another name.
Constable Galbraith is trying to work inside a Good Ol Boys Club which hasn't been aired out in the twenty first century. Women don't belong and even better is transgender are even less welcome. Not that many years back these mental apes were arresting trans anything. Possibly even helping them trip and fall, run into walls, and other clumsy events before and after they were put in a cell for charges they never committed. Heath is a perfect example of keeping the corruption in the force beyond sale by date.
Hugs Sam, excellent writing skills
Barb
Some gracefully bow out and leave. They are missed, never forgot for the joy they brought.

Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl

Patience grasshoppers

All will be revealed in time.

I just hope it won’t take TOO long.

I hope the ride went well.

Podracer's picture

Also that it was spectacular and satisfying. I missed my (3-wheel) trip due to circumstances a few years ago.
This story is great, peopled believably and also has a dog in it ;)

"Reach for the sun."