My cell-phone chimes rang, indicating a text. I picked up my phone. The text was from... Great Grandma Gloucester?
I texted back, "Hey, GGMa!" Then "Nice 2 read U!" "U can text!"
GGMa: "I've just learned." "And you're already using 1337 with me!"
Me: "My respect for U and Ur texting."
GGMa: "I'm flattered." "Is Ur mom with you?"
"Hey, Mom. It's Great-Grandma Gloucester! She wants to text you." I handed her my phone.
Mom fingered things into the phone, thumbing one last key with a flourish, followed by a grimace. "Auto-correct again!" she said to me. "It definitely has a sense for the absurd." She returned, and fingered in more, until -- "Oh, my grating hemlocks!" That last word came out faint, and she began a slow collapse.
I managed to get to her in time, to set her onto the couch. I picked up the phone and saw the exchange:
Mom: "Hey, Grandma Gloucester!" "How's my pregnant Grandmother-in-Law?"
GGMa: "Jenny, Dear! How did U ever find out?"
Mom had been in the middle of a text when she collapsed: "Sorry, I meant".
Mom was just beginning to recover when my baby sister burst in. "Hey Mommy, Taylor! Great-Grandmother Bainbridge got knocked up a couple months ago! She's having twins!"