---

 
Previously

“We’ll be at the movies in the Lycoming Mall, but first a trip to Penney’s…Yeah…I’ve got the boy with me…we’ll be in that Twilight Saga thing…yeah…Be careful…okay? Oh and Dani…look for two redheads…no…mother and ….daughter. And Dani…I love you!”

An hour later two figures stood in line for the two o’clock show. A mother with medium length red hair, dressed in cream colored slacks and sandals and a kelly green button down blouse and a chic short brown leather jacket. The daughter wore a green and black horizontal wide striped mini over black jersey leggings and black sketchers. Her green cardigan was tied around her neck by the sleeves. Her bright red hair was pulled back to reveal a new jade necklace and her ears were adorned with new hoop earrings. She looked much more comfortable and confident than her ‘mother’ had expected.

“I’m sorry we had to do this.” Donna said in an almost whisper.

“That’s okay...I actually wanted to see this movie.” Tim said.

“No...I meant…I’m sorry you had to…you know …dress like a girl. We have to hide, and they’ll be looking for a blonde woman and a red-headed boy. I’m sorry.” Donna shrugged.

“No…I don’t mind…it’s okay…you don’t have to apologize.” Tim said again, his soft high voice seemed to match his attire; Donna found that almost disconcerting.

“I mean…even at that…most boys…you know…would be…having to wear girl’s clothes.”

“Well, I guess that makes sense, but I don’t mind wearing girl’s clothes….since I’m a girl.” Tim smiled and Donna just stared before saying to herself.

“Son of bitch…she is a girl.”

---

Outside the Lycoming Mall 12 Multiplex Theater

Donna looked around nervously. They had abandoned the car in the back of the mall in the employee parking area; no one would discover the car for quite some time. She still wondered even with the change in clothes and hair whether they’d be picked out of the crowd. They were.

“Oh hi, honey… Did you guys like the movie? A tall-ish woman approached them. She wore black linen slacks and sandals with a maroon shell. Her hair was auburn, and she had very exotic looking eyes. As she neared them, Tim stepped behind Donna; at 5’8” he likely would have been taller than her but for her two-inch heels.

“Oh, hi sweetheart,” Donna called in return. “We’re sorry you couldn’t make it. We loved it.” In actuality Donna didn’t like the movie at all. The Twilight thing was sold out and they got stuck watching a lame comedy.

“I’ve got the rest of the day off; my boss doesn’t even know I’m gone.” Dani smiled hugged the boy before embracing Donna. Tim stared at the couple and smiled.

“They think you did it,” she whispered and pulled away slowly. Donna tried to hide the shock on her face.

“That’s interesting. Why don’t we go get something to eat, honey?

“Okay, that sounds like a great idea.” She grabbed the boy by the hand and said,

“We can finish shopping after we eat, okay?” The boy nodded, recognizing the need to keep up pretenses.

“Maybe we can go to Victoria’s Secret?” Tim smiled as they passed the store. Any other teen and Donna would have believed the boy was kidding, but with him and what she had seen and heard, he probably did want to shop there.

“Maybe…” She smiled as they reached the exit. A tall man in his late fifties stood at the doorway and scanned them as they passed. Shaking his head, he looked at his watch before scanning the people approaching the exit as Donna and Dani and Timmy walked out unnoticed.

---

TGI Fridays in Williamsport

"When did you know... aaa….what do I call you?" The ginger-haired girl sat very lady-like while eating a cob salad. It seemed to Donna to be almost uncanny how the child had switched from boy mode to girl in such a short time.

"Well, my name is Donna but we'll need to use different names. You can call me...

"Why doesn't she just call you Mommy,” the other woman teased as she sipped her sweet tea. Donna was never able stomach the almost sickening saccarine taste of sweet tea, even after spending years in Georgia when her father was in the service.

"Oh...I suppose she has two Mommies, then?" Donna said before continuing.

"Why don't you call me Nicole...it was my Mom's name." It was odd after all these years; the only connection Donna had with her mother was at that moment in adopting her name.

"Nicole? Nikki...like in Castle? Nikki Heat?" The girl laughed softly and Donna's cheeks grew warm.

"Why then…I can be Paris... sisters we are, having grown up together separately. The girl looked at her and smiled.

"Well that would be fairly idiotic, wouldn't it....you being Asian and her being White!"

The girl wasn't being racist. She just was unable to read social cues and she struggled with impulse control as well. Having only just met her, Dani misunderstood and took it personally.

"Just a second, kid...that's uncalled for and." She was interrupted by a hand grabbing her wrist softly.

"She's not...she can't help it." Donna tried not to exclude the girl but a soft voice spoke up.

"Aspergers....sorry...I was in a special program at school...they were really good at helping, and I have gotten better...really."

"That's....okay." Dani turned to Donna and raised her eyebrows and shrugged as if to say,

"What did we just get ourselves into?"

"Are you two lovers?" She said it with such grace and aplomb and so unexpectedly that Donna nearly snarffed her Diet Pepsi. While she was composing herself, Dani helped out by answering.

"You are looking, kid, at the love of my life." She smiled at the girl and then back at Donna.

"She's done everything to bring meaning to my life and she brings me great joy." Dani shook her head, wondering why she had been so self-revealing. She took a sip of her tea even as Donna looked up. Without missing a beat, she said calmly.

"And I screw like a mink...her mink!" Donna laughed as Dani nearly spit her tea onto the table.

"Well...that's good, isn't it?" The girl looked back and forth between the two. Dani wiped the tea from her nose and smiled.

"That's very good, kid."

"So Nicole and???" She looked at Dani for an answer.

"Paulette...My mom's name." She stuck out her tongue.

"So Nicole and Paulette it is, but what about you?" Donna leaned closer to gain eye contact as the girl's gaze had begun to wander.

"Sweetie, look at me, okay?"

"Oh...sorry. Could you...would you mind calling me Eowyn?" She put her head down and her already rosy cheeks darkened. Dani put her hand to her chin in a thoughtful pose.

"Hmmm...Twenty-first Century Neo-hippie lesbian couple with Tolkien-inspired transgender daughter named Eowyn? Works for me!" Donna laughed softly. It was good to laugh...the first time since they left the girl's house in terrified flight. She closed her eyes to take a moment to savor the rest, but her arm felt a gentle tug.

"So...you were saying? Actually you never told me and I wanted to find out because it's important and I need to know because if I don't I'll..." Donna touched the girl's cheek softly and whispered,

"Not so loud, honey...and you don't have to worry...I'll answer any question you like." Donna wanted the girl to understand that she wasn't going anywhere...no urgency ...at least when it came to curiosity; she'd be there in the morning.

"Okay, I'm sorry!" The girl grew redder once again and folded her arms. Tears came to her eyes and she looked away.

"Honey...Eowyn...sweetheart?" Dani wasn't used to relating to children, but she felt oddly empowered and spoke.

"You're not in trouble. We just need to be quiet so that no one sees us, okay? Now...what was your question?

"I wanted to know when Nikki here first felt like she was a girl...you know...did you have feelings when you were little...did they come before or after you were abused...you know."

"Hon...I wasn't abused at all. Nothing happened to me."

"No...Not that...I mean when they started fucking you...when did that happen."

"It never happened...I was never hurt that way!" Donna looked at Eowyn and tried to put the girl at ease.

"Why are you lying...What the fuck is the deal here...why are you lying." The girl's face grew redder once again, but her embarrassment was replaced by sadness, some anger, and horror as she realized by Donna's expression that she was telling the truth.

"No...It's not fair...fuck it, it's not fair." By now she was getting hysterical and a look of panic crossed Donna's face; there was no way they wouldn't be noticed. Tears fell from girl's face as she got up.

"No fucking fair!" She ran into the ladies room as every eye followed her exit. Donna looked at Dani with a look that said, "I'll go help her, but what do we do about this." Without a word, Dani nodded and put her head on hands in thought as Donna hurried out. A moment later she stood up and said loudly, hoping no one there was from Allentown,

"Thank you…Thank you…. We're an improv group from the Little Players Theater in Allentown. I hope you enjoyed the show." She remained standing, looking around the room with almost pleading eyes and hoping no one was from Allentown. Her worry was interrupted as an older man stood up and began to clap. Soon everyone in the room was standing and applauding, causing Dani's face to grow warm. She nodded in acknowledgment before sitting down. She raised her hand and the waitress came quickly.

"Beer... Do you have any Killians Red?" The girl nodded and Dani signed 'two' and said,

"One for me and my...wife." The girl shrugged and made a crinkle in her nose before saying,

"Ohh...I think that's so nice...You and your wife....you must be from out of state...My cousin Tiffany from Iowa is married to a nice girl…did I say that...I'm sorry." She paused and said quietly before walking away,

"Don't say anything, but it'll be on the house. Your little play was so good! I'm in my theater group at the community college and I want to be in theater once I finish school...oh there I go again, sorry." She smiled nervously as Dani wondered if the girl and their waitress had been separated at birth.

---

TGI Fridays Ladies Room

“Tim? Timmy?” Donna called as the walked into the ladies room. The girl stood by the sinks and was shaking.

“Stop using that name! I hate that name! I hate it.” She tried in vain to wipe the tears from her face as they cascaded down her cheek.

“Okay…I’m not sure I can remember Eowyn…what can I call you?” Donna walked closer and went to put her hand on the girl’s shoulder but she turned away.

“I don’t care…just don’t use that name!” She looked at the girl and marveled. If she hadn’t met her hours before as the boy they were to interview, she would have never known there even was a boy. She thought for a moment.

“You ever read the Narnia books?” She was grasping at straws. Even at fifteen, the girl looked and acted like a twelve or thirteen year old. She guessed correctly purely by chance.

“Yeah…I read them to Billy before he went to live with his aunt.

“Well, I have a favorite character…Jill Pole, you remember?”

“Yeah… the voice sounded so immature and yet the girl was bright and engaging at times.

“Well I think you’re a strong and brave girl, honey, so I think Jill suits you, okay.” She nodded as her tears began to abate. She looked at Donna and shook her head.

“I still think it’s fucking unfair!”

“I know it hurts. My first…my wife was abused as a child. I don’t know if I could go through that and survive, but you did!” She wanted so much to hold the girl in her arms. She couldn’t remember the last time she hugged a child, and the one time she wanted to she was unable.

“Girls like me get fucked, don’t they?” She almost pled, looking for something that would ease her pain.

“Why do you say that, honey?” Donna had almost never used endearing terms, even when she was married to Jean.

“Because it’s true.” She argued, almost like a little girl. She even stamped one foot.

“Jill…Jill,” Donna said softly while cupping the girl’s chin with her hand. She looked up and she had begun to cry.

“Why do you say that…did someone tell you that?” Donna was fairly sure someone had,

“Because she said it!” She emphasized the word ‘said,’ as if it were a command.

“Who said it, Jill? Who told you that?” Donna kept eye contact and continued to speak softly. The girl pursed her lips.

“My mom! She said that any boy who wants to be a girl should be fucked.” Donna could hardly believe what she heard; the profanity didn’t faze her in the least, but she was shocked that her own mother would have said that.

“Oh, honey, why would she say that?” Donna really did want to know, but it came out as questioning whether or not she actually said it.

“Oh, you’re just like everybody else…she couldn’t have said that…why would your mother say that?” The girl was screaming at this point.

“No, Jill, honey, I just want to understand….Why did she say that? What happened?” Donna knew what happened, but the girl needed some connection and understanding.

“She hated me…She hated all of us….it kept her from having fun…” It was painful, and Donna tried to calm her down. She stepped closer and pulled the girl in quickly and gave her a bear hug. Jill tried to pull away but Donna just held on while speaking softly in the girl’s ear.

“Shhh…shhhh…you’re safe….I’ve got you….don’t be afraid….shhhhh.” Slowly the girl’s body began to relax and she was weeping softly on Donna’s shoulder.

“Why did Mommy hate us…why did she hate me…I just wanted to be like her.” Donna felt the girl's sobs as she shuddered.

“I don’t know honey…I don’t know.”

Long walks in the dark through
woods grown behind the park,
I asked God who I'm supposed to be.
The stars smiled down on me,
God answered in silent reverie.
I said a prayer and fell asleep.

---

The two exited the ladies room and walked the short hallway into the dining room. One after another of the diners stood up and began applauding. Donna looked in amazement at Dani who shrugged her shoulder and mouthed…

“Just go along and smile.” She turned and waved as they walked to the cashier to pay. Moments later they walked the door to applause and cheers and one woman yelling,

“Please let us know when you put on your play…we’d love to see it!’

---

The Eagles Mere Inn in Williamsport

“She’s asleep,” Donna said as Dani came out of the bathroom. Nicole and Paulette Underhill and their daughter Jill found the bed and breakfast out of the way just outside Willamsport. Donna sat down on the bed, able to relax for the first time since their flight began hours before.

“You okay?” Dani knew better than to ask that question without being ready for an answer.

“I’ve been shot at, my partner got killed, I’m on the run because the whole world thinks I’m a murderer and you ask me…” Dani put her finger to Donna’s lips.

“We…not just you…we are on the run because we are going to find out who is responsible for hurting this kid and killing your partner and framing you. It’s going to be okay, alright?”

“But…” Dani put her finger to Donna’s lips before saying,

“I can see I’m going to have to take some drastic measures.” She pulled Donna closer and began kissing her.

“Stop…Dani…no…nnnhh,” she began to almost coo as Dani kissed her neck.

“Bbb..ut….”

“Shhh…it’s okay, honey…just hugs and kisses…the children might wake up.” Dani laughed softly as they fell back on the bed. After some hugs and kisses, Donna fell asleep with Dani spooning her and singing softly in her ear.

"I had a dream...that I could fly from the highest tree...I had a dream."

I lived it full and I lived it well,
there's many tales I've lived to tell.
I'm ready now, I'm ready now,
I'm ready now to fly from the highest wing.
I had a dream

Next: Nightmares!

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Dream
words and music
and performance by
Priscilla Ahn
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7z2vEwF0f2s&NR=1