Regrets

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Regrets

Brian Miller was bored. He was in a crowd of students milling about in the schoolyard next to the sidewalk. Lunch was over and he would be going to his favorite class; Physical Education. Suddenly, he noticed he was behind “Chrissy”. Chris Wilson was a boy who had announced that he was a girl “at heart” and would proceed toward transitioning from a boy to a girl. The principal announced that there would be no harassment of Chrissy. “Yeah, right,” thought Brian when he heard the announcement. This boy was at the top of the “kids to harass” list.

Chrissy was facing the sidewalk with her back to Brian. It was too easy. He bent down like he was picking up something, and pushed Chrissy’s upper back with his elbow. She was a tiny thing, so there was no resistance. Then … time seemed to slow down as, out of nowhere, the janitor came riding his golf cart down the sidewalk. Brian watched … helpless to undo what he had done. Chrissy fell face-first on the sidewalk directly in front of the cart and the janitor was unable to stop. The wheel of the cart rolled over her arm and her body stopped the cart. The janitor jumped off the cart and, with the help of some of the stronger schoolboys, pulled the cart off the girl.

Brian barely believed the scene he was watching. He had harassed and bullied kids before, but this was serious. Would he go to jail? Probably the “Alternative Learning Center”. Then he heard some kids saying, “She fell right in front of it!” No one saw what he did! He looked at Chrissy and saw that her dress was torn, her arm was bleeding, and she was crying. Brian felt something he had rarely felt … sympathy. As he watched the scene, with people helping the hurt girl, he realized that her tears were contagious. Tears started down his cheeks. He couldn’t cry in front of everyone! He made a quick exit and began searching for a secluded place. He found a place where the building made a tiny inlet just big enough for one person. He sat there trying to control his crying.

Not many people were passing this way, but fate decided that the one person that would pass would be Katie; Chrissy’s older sister. As she passed, she saw Brian sitting by the school staring at the bricks. His eyes were red. “Are you OK?”

He sniffed, “Yeah, I’m fine.” The tears were gone.

“OK, I gotta go. Chrissy got hurt. She fell in front of the janitor’s cart. My dad is picking me up to go see her at the hospital.”

“The hospital? Why?”

“They took her to the emergency room.”

He put his head in his hand and groaned.

Katie smiled. “Don’t take it so hard! It’s not like you did it!”

Brian had gained his composure. “Yeah, that’s right.” Suddenly, without warning, the tears came back. They were big and uncontrollable.

“Well, what is it? Why are you crying?”

“It’s nothing.”

“This is weird! You’re the last person I would expect to see crying, and when I do see you crying it’s about ‘nothing’.”

“I don’t want to talk about it! Go see about your sister!”

“Wait a minute; you’ve given her a hard time before. Did you maybe have something to do …?”

“I didn’t push her … OK?”

“You were there? She was pushed?”

“I don’t know! Just go!”

“Bye!”

Katie left quickly. She moved like someone with a purpose.

Brian realized that if no one had a clue that Chrissy was pushed, they would now. “Good going, dummass. You pretty much confessed to Katie. They’re going to start looking closer now. They’ll talk to the people who were there and probably find someone who saw what really happened.” A scene played repeatedly in his head. It was a visualization of Chrissy falling and getting hit by the golf cart. He would shudder when he visualized this.

He tried moving the blame to someone else. “Why did she stand so close to me?” He realized that wouldn’t work. Chrissy probably didn’t even know he was there. “That damn janitor should look where he’s going.” Actually, the janitor was a really nice guy that everyone liked, and he wasn’t hiding anything. He had heard a saying somewhere, “You haven’t lived if you don’t have some regrets”. If this is living, life sucks!

He wanted to tell Chrissy that the person who pushed her apologizes. Wait! First, he had to find out if they know that she was pushed. If he confesses, he could be headed to the “Alternative Learning Center”. That was just a nice way of saying “Reform School”.

He walked home. He couldn’t focus on schoolwork anyway. He lay across his bed and went to sleep.

Back in school, a girl walked into class and handed the teacher a note. She read the note and looked up. “Brian Miller”.

He got up and walked to the teacher’s desk.

“Brian, you’re wanted in the principal’s office.”

He sat before the principal. “Brian, we know exactly what happened to Chrissy.”

“Yes, sir. Please don’t send me to the ‘Alternative Learning Center’.”

“Don’t worry about that. You’re going straight to prison.”

“What? No please! I didn’t mean to….”

He opened his eyes. He was in his room. He grabbed his cell phone and punched in some numbers.

“Hello?”

“Ken, would you see if your sister has Katie Wilson’s cell number?”

“OK. Hey did you hear? Chrissy Wilson …”

“Yeah, I heard. Text me the number is she has it.”

“OK.”

“Bye.”

Bryan’s mind raced as he waited for a text. He thought it must have been an hour, but a glance at the clock showed it had only been 7 minutes. Finally, his phone beeped. It was a text with a phone number. Nervously, he dialed the number.

“Hello?”

“Is this Katie?”

“Yes, who’s calling?”

“Brian Miller.”

“Oh … hello, Brian.”

“Look could I come to the hospital and talk to you?”

“We’ll be home in 10 minutes. Chrissy just went to the emergency room. If you need to talk, come by the house.”

“I’ll be there in about 20 minutes.”

“Ok.”

After he got off the phone, he realized that he didn’t know what he was going to say. Was he going to confess? What other reason could he possibly have for going to their house? He wasn’t really friends with either girl. He thought to himself, “Well, I’m not friends with the girl or her brother … who wants to be her sister.”

He decided to just go to the house and see how things went. He waited about 10 minutes, then began the 10-minute walk to their house. He rang the bell and Katie answered the door. “Come in, Brian.”

He stepped into the house, noticing how spotless and neat it was. “Come on to Chrissy’s room.”

She led him down the hall and into Chrissy’s room. Chrissy was sitting up in her bed. She was bruised and bandaged. “Brian, you’re the last person I would ever expect to see here. To what do I owe this visit?”

“I … um … wanted to see how you were.”

“Oh, I’m fine. I don’t have a lot of pain. If I start to hurt, I have some medicine the doctor sent home with me.

“Uh … that’s good.”

“So, Brian, why are you suddenly concerned about my welfare? Do you have something to tell me?”

Brian Mumbled

“What? Brian, you’re mumbling!”

“I’m sorry!”

“You’re sorry? What are you sorry for?”

“I pushed you in front of that cart!”

“I know.”

“You do? How did you know?”

“I felt a push on my back and I caught a glimpse of you behind me as I was falling. I thought it might be you that pushed me. Then, Katie told me that she found you crying, and you knew that I was pushed. It all came together pretty easily.”

“Who all knows?”

“The three people in this room.”

“Not even your parents?”

“If they knew, they would probably call the school, or maybe the police.”

“Chrissy, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know this would happen. I thought just a little push ….”

“All in fun, huh?”

Brian thought he was going to cry.

“OK, Brian. Katie and I will keep quiet. All I ask is for you to give me a break. No name-calling or other harassment. We’ll keep it quiet, but I can’t guarantee that no one else saw what happened.”

“Thanks, Chrissie.”

“Also, let me say, ‘I’m amazed’! You have a conscience!”

“Yeah, can you keep that quiet, too?”

“Sure, if people find out you’re a decent person, they won’t hear it from me.”

“Thanks … I think.”

“Who knows? Maybe we’ll be friends! Then, when it comes time for prom ….”

“Well, I don’t know about that!”

“Brian, I’m kidding!”

“Oh. Well, actually you’re … never mind.”

“Oh, you gotta finish that sentence now!”

“OK. I was gonna say you're kinda cute. If it gets out that I said that, I’ll deny it!”

“Wow! That’s amazing! You honestly think I’m cute?”

“Sure! You’re cute for a ‘not girl’!”

“I’m not a ‘not girl’!”

“Huh?”

“I’m a girl!”

“OK, listen. You’re a girl and you’re kinda cute! There, I said it.”

“Thank you, Brian. You’re a decent guy. There, I said it.”

“Thanks, Chrissy. Honestly, I’m really sorry I pushed you, but at least we got to talk.”

“Yeah, I’m glad you came by.”

“I better go. See you tomorrow at school?”

“Sure. My injuries were actually minor.”

“Bye, Chrissy.”

“Come closer.”

“What? Why?”

“Give me a hug!”

“Oh, OK.” The two ex-enemies hugged. “You smell good, Chrissy.”

“It’s ‘Kenneth Cole’.”

“Who is that?”

“It’s the name of my perfume, Brian.”

“Oh. I don’t wear it.”

“Of course not. Brian, you’re such a guy!”

“Thank you. I intend to stay that way!”

“To each his or her own. Bye Brian.”

“Bye Chrissy.”

Brian left the girls’ house and walked home in the cool evening air. “I’m a decent person! That’s not so bad!”

When it was time for senior prom, Chrissy had several guys ask to take her. She accepted the first one to ask. She and Brian had a wonderful evening.

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Comments

Regrets

I love it. She got pushed but it looks like maybe he got saved.

Time is the longest distance to your destination.