Echoes V

Melanie Ezell

Over a year, but the next three chapters are here! Thanks to John in Wauwatosa for test reading and suggestions! I'll try to have the next chapters in less time.

Miriam's doctor's appointment doesn't go as well as he would have liked. What's going on, and how can he stop it? More importantly, is he even sure he wants to?

Echoes

Melanie Ezell

Chapter 11: Beautiful Disasters

"What the FUCK!"

"Miriam!"

"Sorry, Mom."

Felicity grimaced, but conceded, "Well, I guess this is that kind of moment." Bill let out a humorless laugh at that.

"I'm terribly sorry, but at this point there isn't really all that much we can do. I mean, maybe if we'd caught it sooner... I still don't understand..." Doctor Tucker skimmed through her notes for the fourth time since sitting down with them, before closing the file angrily.

"What's the matter?" Miriam couldn't keep himself from asking.

Doctor Tucker gave him an appraising look before responding, "None of your previous blood work shows anything wrong. Unfortunately, until the analysis of what work we've just done comes in, I can't give a definitive answer to what's going on, but my initial exam doesn't look good. Bill, Felicity, I've known ya'll for years, and while in most cases I wouldn't phrase things quite like this, I have to say that the easiest way to describe your son's biology right now is 'fucked up.' The blood tests will tell us more, but until then, my best guess is that you've got an elevated level of estrogen in your system. A lot of males develop small breasts due to this, but in your case this seems to be combined with low testosterone levels, and could lead to some major problems."

This hit Miriam even harder than the doctor's guarantee that he had breasts. *So what, I'm really turning into a girl?* "What does this mean? I mean, what happens to me now?"

"I'm afraid we don't really know. I can promise you that things are going to get worse before they get better though. Expect more growth, and soon- from what Felicity said, breast growth is rapid on her side of the family," a nod from his Mom confirmed this, "so I wouldn't be surprised if you were a full A by the end of next week. In the absence of male hormones, your body is taking the female ones without resistance, and until we know what's going on I can't give you anything to slow that down. There may be other complications..."

<=====>

"Miriam, sweetie?"

"Mom, please, just leave me alone, okay?" The doctor's visit had been horrid to begin with but her recommendation had been the worst.

"Miriam," his Dad said sternly over the seat, "you'll have to consider it if things get much worse."

"I know, Dad." *But, a BRA?*

<=====>

The bow made a sharp 'PTWOP' as Cary unleashed another arrow into the target, barely off center enough to miss his last shot. *Maybe, just maybe, we can win this year.*

The low "Dammit" from Jonathan made him look over to see another shot off into the blue on his target. *Then again, maybe not.*

<=====>

"Three Mondo Burgers with fries, no ketchup on one of them."

“Would you like drinks with that sir? Right now you can get a Mondo Shake for only a dollar thirty nine if you upgrade to a combo meal.”

“You two want shakes?” Miriam shook his head no and turned back to staring out the window. We’re good, thanks.”

“That’ll be eleven thirty nine, pull up to the next window please sir.”

<=====>

"And one, two, three lift your knees more five, six, seven keep your arms raised nine, ten, eleven one more measure thir-teen, four-teen, fif-teen, STOP." Lindy lowered her leg to the floor and took a deep breath as she cooled down from the workout. She found it useful to use recorded tracks of her teacher's voice to make sure she kept up with the work even when at home.

*Would they be home yet?* She crossed the floor space over to where her phone sat on the end of her dresser, but stopped herself. *No, I'll wait.* She wasn't sure if they had returned home yet, and besides, would they want to be bothered first thing when getting back?

Frustrated, she turned back to her stereo and started the next track on the practice CD.

<=====>

Miriam was laughing at his dad as they returned home, listening to Bill recount horror stories from his college days. *My dad was such a goofball in college- how did he ever get a degree?* But Miriam knew his father worked very hard, and despite appearances Miriam knew he was a strong man when it came to taking care of his family. *Something I'll never be...*

"Catch!"

Miriam looked up in time to see something orange and white sailing towards him, unraveling in the air-

And felt a meaty smack against his stomach when the hamburger reached him unprotected.

"Oops."

<=====>

Jonathan turned the phone off and handed it back to Cary. "I'll see ya later man, my mom wants me home ta get some more rest 'fore school t'morrow."

"Later dude." The two slapped hands in the air before Cary escorted Jonathan out the door, wondering if he should call Miriam to see how he was. *Just where did they go anyways? It's not like them to just- head off like that.* He shrugged his shoulders, trying to force himself to think of something else, but it wasn't working.

"Ya'll done outside?"

Cary sighed. "Yes, Dad."

"You put everything up?"

"Yes."

"'Kay."

Turning around, he made his way back down the hallway to his own room. *Maybe some music. Drawing, video games, writing..."

<=====>

"I'm goin' to bed, Mom."

"Goodnight sweetie."

"Night son."

Miriam gave his mom and dad each a hug before heading upstairs to sleep. Not that he expected to get much sleep tonight, with everything that had happened. *That stupid voice. What's it got against me anyways?* It was only eight o'clock, but his room was the only place Miriam felt he could go in the house without being disturbed. He briefly contemplated borrowing his father's guitar, but after half a second's thought rejected the idea as being too much effort.

A smile crossed his lips as she remembered the time George had taken his guitar with them out to the river. He had played her a love song he 'wrote' for her, obviously making it up as he went along, but the disjointed lyrics and tuneless strumming made her laugh. *You'd think he'd try to learn to play before serenading me, don't you?*

She didn't even hear the phone ring as she lay down on her bed to dream.

<=====>

"Locksley residence."

"Mrs. Locksley? Hey, it's Lindy. I was wondering if I could talk to Miriam if that's okay?"

"I'm sorry, he's already gone to bed. Is it important, should I wake him?"

*Bed? It's only eight fifteen!* Lindy covered the phone while she growled in frustration. "No, that's okay. I'll check in with him tomorrow."

"Alright then. Good night, Lindy."

"'Night, Mrs. Locksley."

It took over a half hour more of dance practice before Lindy was calm enough to sit again. Surely nothing was wrong? Maybe he just didn't feel good and went to bed early.

*Yeah, right.*

No sooner was she sat down than her phone rang again. "Hello?"

"Hey Lindy! Ah, it's Cary. Hey, can we talk for a bit?"

"Sure, whatcha need ta talk about?" Cary was someone she could discuss Miriam with, and hopefully get some answers. Maybe he called them before Miriam went to bed?

"Do you know where Miriam and his parents went this afternoon?" Crap. "I mean, it wouldn't be a big deal 'cept everything that's gone on with Prince and that hypnotism-ist guy."

"Yeah. Actually, I was hoping you knew something. Ya'll've got a lot closer the last few days."

"Uh, yeah." She could actually hear him blushing through the phone, making her smile.

"Almost like boyfriend and GIRLfriend."

"Awp!"

Yup, he had it bad. "Oh, come on, everybody's been expecting or suspecting it for a couple of years now, not like that's news to you. Besides, ya'll're cute together."

"Whatever. Hey, I'm gonna call him and see if he's alright, want me to call you back with the news?"

*Snort.* "I would have called you with it if he was up. His mom said he's already in bed."

"Shit! I really wanted to talk to her. I mean HIM! I mean-"

"Don't worry about it," she butted in, then sighed. " I've been having the same problem. Cary, we need to get this straightened out, I'm really worried about, uh... her."

"Me too."

<=====>

Not feeling much reason to stay awake if he couldn't talk to Miriam, Cary decided bed might be a good idea after all.

<=====>

Jonathan wasn't sure what to make of the situation his friends were in. Cary and Miriam? No biggie, not like they hadn't seen THAT one coming a mile away. He had to chuckle when he realized the only people who seemed to be surprised by the Cary/Miriam thing were Cary and Miriam. *It kinda blows your mind, don't it?* He knew he had missed a lot the past few days, with being out sick, but he still found it shocking just HOW much he had missed.

It didn't take Jonathan long once he got home to finish the minimum amount of the makeup work he felt he could get by with and on his computer games. His cousins had given him a copy of the new 'Everia' MMO for his birthday a few months back, and while sick he had spent countless hours playing the game. Maybe Nena and Organa would be online tonight? All concern for his real life friends faded as he yet again lost himself in the game.

<=====>

Chapter 12: A Burden Shared...

Miriam was slightly less surprised the following morning to find Cary already waiting for him outside his front door instead of at the corner. He was honestly happy to see his friend ready and waiting. After the bad news at the doctor's office the day before, he knew that if he were left alone he would turn to contemplation of what was happening, and was instead determined to distract himself as much as possible from the problems in his life, a goal made all the harder by the ace bandage wrapped tightly around his chest in an attempt to minimize the appearance of his new 'burdens'. It wasn't a perfect solution, and it was painful, but it was better than the alternative his mom had offered that morning.

"Hi!"

"Hey, Miriam. Ready for school?"

"As much as I ever am." Cary rose from his perch on the front stoop and began the slow walk to school.

<=====>

*I've got to talk to her about it some time. Why not now?* Cary glanced over towards his best friend and often times partner in crime. Was he really interested in Miriam 'in that way'? After days of soul searching and his talk with Jonathan the night before, the only answer Cary could come up with was a resounding 'yes'. Now if only he could tell her!

Passing a neighbor's front lawn, Cary noticed their two puppies, who had recently grown a great deal in size. *If nothing else, I can find SOMETHING to talk about?* "Gettin' big, aren't they?"

Miriam winced. "What?"

"The twins." Cary saw Miriam's face go pale. "The puppies? It seems like just last week they were half the size they are now." Miriam seemed to be growing increasingly uncomfortable with the line of the conversation.

"Uh, I, um, don't know what you're talking about." Cary watched as Miriam crossed his arms nervously.

"Boris and Natasha? Miss Scarlett's beagles?"

"Oh. Oh! Right!" Miriam visibly relaxed. "Yeah, they're so energetic too."

"Do you think she'd be willing to give one of 'em away?"

Miriam gave him a glowing smile, and Cary felt his heart skip a beat. "That might be nice, let's check by this afternoon."

The conversation quickly dried up again, and Cary spent a few uncomfortable moments trying to find a way to phrase what he wanted to say to the pretty young thing beside him, when a whistle ahead broke his concentration. Lindy seemed to appear out of nowhere as she dashed towards Miriam, who grew agitated again. She wrapped her arms around the smaller teenager tightly, and Cary could almost swear he saw her squint her eyes in confusion before pulling away.

"Cary?" Miriam called.

"Yeah?"

"I need to talk to Lindy about something, if that's okay."

Cary was crushed. "Alright." *Great, now I'm losing my best friend to a girl.* Cary continued walking a ways away, and a light came to his eyes as his mouth took on a more determined set.

He would tell Miriam how he felt soon.

But first, he had to figure out exactly what he was feeling to begin with.

<=====>

Lindy gave Miriam a quick once-over before falling into step beside him. She wasn't sure what he wanted to talk to her about, but she had suspicions.

"Lindy?"

"Yeah?"

Miriam shuffled along a bit, never quite looking her in the face. He seemed to be more nervous than usual today, even for all that had happened lately. He mumbled something, but Lindy was unable to make the words out.

"I'm sorry, Miriam, I couldn't understand what you said."

She saw him blush before speaking more clearly. "I need your help with something a bit, umm, personal."

Now Lindy was curious. "What?"

"Uh, you know how all the past lives were girls and stuff?"

"Yeah? And?"

Miriam glanced towards Cary, who was a ways ahead of them on the street, before seeming to mumble something again.

"Miriam," Lindy started, exasperated, "you'll have to speak up, otherwise I can't hear you."

"I think I'm turning into a girl!" He whispered harshly before slapping a hand over his mouth, as though he were afraid someone might have heard him.

Lindy gave him a sharp look. "And what makes you think that?" she questioned. She wanted him to say it. *I can't help him if he won't admit what the problem is. But at least I'm prepared.*

"Uh, um. Okay." Miriam's eyes darted towards Cary again- still ahead of them and out of range of quiet voices. "Uh, the doctor's office yesterday?"

Lindy nodded.

"Well, she said that I'm not normal and I've, uh, kinda got. Oh boy."

She felt like growling, or even telling Miriam what she already figured he wanted, but tried her best to stay calm. "What IS it!" She hissed, barely keeping her voice down.

"Boobs."

"... is that it?"

"Huh?"

"It's kind of obvious," Lindy huffed. "I mean, no offence, but I know what they feel like from personal experience and-" She was cut short by a cry from Miriam, and turning, found her- him- near tears, with a stricken look on his face.

*Uh oh.* Lindy felt like smacking herself. *Wrong thing to say.*

<=====>

Jonathan pulled on his high tops clumsily as he stumbled through the screen door, rushing to try and make it to school on time. *No way I can meet up with the others today, no time!* With a final heave he managed to get his feet into the shoes, and not bothering with laces set off at a dead run for school.

<=====>

She KNEW? Miriam couldn't believe he had been stupid enough to believe he could hide it. *It's Mom's fault for sending me to school today, I told her!*

"Oh, Miriam, I'm so sorry!" He looked up through the veil of tears he just couldn't seem to hold back these days to see Lindy staring at him with a tortured expression on her face.

"I thought I'd *sniffle* done alright in, ah, hidin' them?" He self consciously wrapped his arms around himself again, trying to hide his chest.

"You did, really," she said, "and if I hadn't hugged ya I wouldn't'a noticed 'em either, I promise. I'm like SO sorry!"

"It's okay." Miriam shrugged and tried to act like it was no big deal, but was having a hard time keeping from bursting into tears. *Dammit, I'm stronger than this! Why'm I always crying any more?*

"Come on." Lindy's arm around his shoulder pulled him back to reality. "Let's go, we can talk about this later."

Miriam worked hard to keep the sarcasm down, but couldn't resist muttering a less than enthused "Oh, Joy."

<=====>

Felicity chewed on her lower lip as she debated over what to do. Bill had agreed with her that unless they insisted on it there was no way Miriam would ever agree to the doctor’s recommendation, but neither one of them wanted to force a decision like that on their son, even for his own good. His entire life, they had worked so hard to let him make his own decisions, and it just seemed, well, WRONG to make him do something that could cause him so many problems with the other children at his school.

She glanced towards the bed in her son’s room, where the sports bra she had purchased yesterday still sat, unused, next to the plastic wrapper from the medical cabinet. She winced at the idea of the pain her baby boy causing himself in a vain attempt to hide what was happening to his body, and fought the urge to cry.

“He doesn’t deserve this. No child does.” *But what can I do to make it better?*

<=====>

Bill pulled into his parking spot and sat for a few moments, collecting his thoughts. He had a big presentation today with Scots Industries concerning marketing strategies for the next five years, and the last thing he needed was his personal life getting in the way of his work.

*But he’s my son. If I can’t be worried about him, how can I worry about anything at all?* It was an impossible situation, but he had to stay strong. He remembered back to the day Miriam was born. They had been so proud, their first child- and after the complications, their only child. Miriam had been both his and Felicity’s entire reason for living, and even as Miriam grew up Bill never stopped thinking of him as that baby lying in his wife’s arms, curled up in a blanket and needing his protection from the big bad world. Bill had swore he would be the best father he could, he would stand in the way of anything that tried to hurt his child, and now, when that protection was needed most, he was helpless.

With a glance in his rear view mirror, Bill Locksley straightened his tie, and stepped out of the blazer’s door. He would put a brave face on for the meeting, and maybe even make it the rest of the day without feeling like he had failed one of the only people who meant more to him than his own life.

Maybe.

<=====>

“Good morning class.”

“Good morning, Mr. Hendricks.”

“Now, today we’re learning about the Aztec Mounds.”

Miriam whimpered. *This is going to be a long day.*

<=====>

Chapter 13: Girl Lessons 101

Johnathan sank into his seat at the lunch table with a yawn, dropping his tray in front of himself with a loud ‘clunk’. “You wouldn’ believe what I’ve been put through t’day, tryin’ ta get all this make up work done! I swear, I was up ‘til two this mornin’ tryin’ to get caught up on it all, an’ I still got three days’ worth a’ the junk to do.”

Cary gave him a clap on the back as he lowered his own tray down on Johnathan’s right. “Don’t worry about it too much, you’ll get there. Hey, this afternoon we’ll skip bow practice if you want some help.” He gave Johnathan an encouraging smile. “By the way, you seen Miriam yet?”

“Yeah, sh- he was just walkin’ in the door when I left the line. I think he was talkin’ with Lindy about something.” Cary’s frown was unexpected. “Hey, what’s goin’ on between those two that’s got ya all wound up?”

“I dunno,” Cary replied. “They’ve been talking all day, and haven’t told me nothin’.”

Johnathan gave his friend a nudge with his elbow. “Don’t worry, man, ya ain’t got nothin’ to worry about. Probably just some girl thing. Er, well, ya know what I mean.”

Cary nodded. “Yeah.”

<=====>

“So you really can’t tell all that bad?”

“NO!” Lindy almost yelled at Miriam. “For the tenth time today, no. God, I shoulda never said anything this morning.”

Miriam just shrugged. “Sorry, I’m just nervous I guess. I keep thinking someone’s gonna run up to me and start pointing and screaming ‘boobs!’ or something.” He laughed. “It’s silly, I know, but…”

“It’s alright.” Lindy grabbed a tray and made her way through the food line, and Miriam followed her with his own.

Classes all morning had been a nightmare. Everything had reminded him of his situation, from history to math. He just knew he would be having nightmares about conic sections for weeks. *And don’t EVEN get me started on the daydreams.* It was easier to think of them as daydreams than memories, he had decided. He couldn’t think of any way to stop them, and daydreams just seemed less traumatizing than the idea that he had actually BEEN the girl he was seeing in his mind’s eye.

“Sound okay?”

“What?” He came back around to see Lindy staring at him.

“I said, does that sound okay?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, sure.” He wasn’t sure what she had been saying, but agreed anyways to get moving along.

“Then follow me home this afternoon and we can try it.”

“Sure.”

<=====>

Lindy was surprised at how quickly and easily Miriam had agreed to her plan, but wasn’t about to question his reasoning. *Maybe he’s really more curious than he wants to admit, even to himself. God, I don’t even know if I should be doing this, but what else CAN I do? This is way worse than what that Gordon guy warned us about.* She glanced over at her best friend, right behind her in the food line and seemingly intent on picking just the right fruit cup. He was already very feminine looking even in a baggy tee shirt and jeans, what would he look like in a skirt? *She’ll probably be prettier than I am. If it goes that far.*

Turning from the lunch line, Lindy made her way for the open seat next to Johnathan at their usual lunch table, and did her best to switch her attention from helping her friend to continuing her entrapment of her prey.

<=====>

Cary grinned widely when Miriam lowered his tray and sat next to him instead of in the empty seat on the other side of Lindy. Was now the time to talk? Or should he wait? “Uh, Miriam?”

“Yeah?”

“I was wondering if this afternoon we could maybe talk or something?” Cary looked towards his small companion with hope in his eyes.

Miriam beamed. “Sure! Oh, I gotta go by Lindy’s first though. Hey, wanna come with me?”

“Sure! I mean, if it’s okay with Lindy.”

<=====>

“Are you sure, Miriam?” Lindy was giving him a carefully neutral look.

“Yeah!” *What could she want that wouldn’t be good for Cary to see? Unless- oh god! Does it have something to do with?*

“Great!” Cary’s expression was too happy for Miriam to go back on his offer now, though he desperately hoped whatever was going to happen didn’t cause him any more problems.

<=====>

*I dunno why, but I have a bad feeling about asking Cary over with us.* Perhaps it was the looks Lindy kept casting him and Cary, or maybe it was the churning in the pit of his stomach that told him he had missed something vitally important, but every step seemed that much harder to make with his best friend in the whole world walking along beside him and happily chattering away as they walked towards what Miriam was more and more sure was certain doom.

“-and well, then I was thinking maybe we could, ah, go to the movies or something?” Cary’s words pierced the veil of concern wrapping Miriam’s thoughts.

“Huh?”

“After this is done? I’ll pay and ev’rything?” Cary gave him the wide eyed puppy dog look that he was so good at before falling on his knees and clasping his hands in front of him. “Please?” He begged with a sappy grin on his face.

Miriam laughed. “Alright, sure. We’ll call Johnathan too- maybe he can take Lindy at the same time.”

“Great!” Cary jumped up and wrapped his arm happily around Miriam for a moment before jerking away suddenly. “Sorry.”

Miriam laughed again. “It’s alright.” He leaned sideways into Cary, pushing him off the sidewalk and yelling “tag!” before setting off at a run for Lindy’s house, Cary taking pursuit behind him.

<=====>

Lindy watched as Miriam and Cary talked ahead of her, and marveled at how they were together. *Even knowing they’re both boys- knowing Miriam all my life- seeing the two of them together is like seeing a guy and a girl. I wonder how much of what’s happening to Miriam is ‘cause of that guy Gordon, and how much of this would have happened anyways?* She heard Miriam yell ‘tag!’ and smiled as she watched them set off, Miriam running full speed and Cary chasing along behind, intentionally staying just slow enough so Miriam could evade while staying close enough to catch her if he really wanted to. *Him, HIM! Shoot, it shouldn’t be that hard!*

Glancing up again, she watched as Miriam reached the front gate of her lawn and Cary finally caught him- *no, on the other hand, definitely ‘her’ right now,*- and spun her around, both laughing and wrestling as Miriam tried to get out of Cary’s grasp, though Lindy could tell she wasn’t fighting too hard.

“Okay, you two, stop that and come on in. Cary, you can hang out downstairs and play my dad’s Xbox- I have something I need to show Miriam.”

<=====>

“What the hell!”

“Ta da!”

Miriam was more than a bit surprised at what it was that Lindy had to ‘show’ him. His worst suspicions were confirmed the moment he had entered the room. Lindy had turned from him and reached into her closet to withdraw four bags. ‘Pac-sun’ and ‘Wet Seal’ were two stores he’d never really shopped at, though he had been in them with Lindy and the other girls a time or two. The third bag was the one that worried him, however.

“Victoria’s Secret?!”

“Well, every girl deserves a little something special- we’re teenagers, Miriam! Practically adults already- would you rather it went to someone who was, like, thirty?” They both shuddered.

“But, I mean, are you gonna model these or somethin’, I mean…”

“No, silly, these are yours!” Lindy beamed.

“What!”

Her smile faltered as Miriam felt his jaw drop. “This is what we were talking about earlier at school, I thought you said you wanted to try- did I misunderstand you? Oh, Miriam, I’m sorry!” Lindy dropped the bags and approached him, wrapping him in her arms. “I thought-“

“Oh,” was all Miriam could say as his eyes wandered down to look at the garments that tumbled from the bags. “Sorry, I wasn’t really paying attention, I guess I was a bit distracted all day, what with, well, you know.”

“That’s okay. Come on, we’ll go back downstairs and tell Cary it was nothing.”

The thought of Cary stopped Miriam cold. He was so much like George, but different too. The same eyes, and goofy smile too. She’d always loved dressing up for her dates with George. And that Northern boy who used to come down and buy their cotton too. *God, I hate these memories or whatever they are!* But even fighting them, seeing the clothes made him wonder.

“Um, Lindy?”

<=====>

“Alright, you wrap it around you like this, and twist your arms back and- yeah, just like that.”

After Miriam’s initial reaction Lindy had been worried he might start crying again, or throwing a fit. She couldn’t believe she hadn’t realized how out of it he was at school to agree to something like this- why hadn’t she seen it?

Because she hadn’t wanted to see it?

*Let’s be honest here, I wanted to do this,* Lindy admitted to herself as she pieced the outfit she had assembled together from the various bags. *Miriam’s always been a bit- okay, a LOT- girlish, and ever since Amanda mentioned trying to talk him into this last year I haven’t been able to get it out of my mind, the stuff with that Gordon guy just gave me an excuse.*

“Lindy?”

She turned around to find her charge decked out in the lingerie she had picked out, bikini panties and all.

*God, even just in her underwear you can’t tell.* “All right, next let’s try on the skirt to make sure it fits.”

<=====>

Cary glanced at his watch nervously as he paced back and forth in the living room. He had exhausted his interest in the game console almost an hour ago, and the girls were still upstairs. *What are they up to?*

“Knock knock.”

Cary turned around to see Lindy standing at the base of the stairs looking into the living room, watching him pace.

“Sorry we took so long.”

“That’s alright. What were ya’ll up to anyways?”

Lindy blushed. “Well, why don’t I let Miriam show you. Miriam?”

Cary watched as a vision from his dreams descended the staircase. It was everything he had ever imagined, and so much more. “Oh, my god…”

<=====>

Thanks for reading! Anything you think needs added or explained more, just leave a comment! More chapters coming soon, so be on the lookout- and I promise a much shorter wait between chapters from now on.

PS: Miss Erin, sorry about the roman numerals, but you said keeping it constant is the biggest thing...