Only the Lonely….
It was the song that was playing on the radio when she woke up in the morning and already saw the start of another hot day. That became a promise as she slipped out of the sheet she had draped over herself last night and had tried to curl up to another night alone.
It just was one of those days where she felt like she was literally meant to be alone. It seemed like the day was already weighing down on her. Born just shy of forty years ago she had been the son of a dockworker down in the south end of Baltimore. Not the greatest neighborhood to grow up being a transgendered youth.
And honestly you wouldn’t have known that about her well him back then if you really looked at him. She used to be called Jim.
Jim was the typical kid growing up in the neighborhood. He was lucky enough to be good at hockey to get him a scholarship and out of the neighborhood. He’d been the families pride and joy going to college and it was in college that Jim found out that he was really Serra. It cost her the family her dad kicking her out and even spent the money they were going to help them out with college costs on an actual funeral where everything about who she was got buried. Yeah a real funeral with a casket and everything.
It hurt that much she left school not being able to keep her scholarship and not being able to pay for the rest of her education and she had left home to head out west and she hadn’t looked back.
Serra Foster just wasn’t sure of where she really fit in this world. She lived all over mostly doing whatever she could to pay for her meds and her SRS. She never hooked or stripped or sold drugs or anything like that but she’d grown up using her hands even if she was a girl and she hired herself out as a day laborer for a long time and then as a contractor and then finally after three years in and around Las Vegas she found herself a home.
A Year after her SRS she got in on a few contracts working with the builds and rebuilds of some of the casinos and actually made enough money to go back to trade school taking the course hours she needed to get her tickets as a carpenter and a plumber as electrician.
Even being complete it took her seven years to drag herself through school; she worked lots of jobs when she wasn’t contracting at first just really wanting to fit into the whole really being what she thought a woman was. She tried waiting tables, the secretarial stuff, a bakery assistant and even at a flower shop just never fitting in with so many of the GG’s who did the normal girl type of jobs she thought that women did. She got a lot of flak in the way of gossip and cattiness that hurt a lot in some of those jobs and then there was trying out for some of those places where there’s the really pretty girls like make-up counters and women’s clothing stores and there was in most of them this unspoken “You’re kidding right?” and the unseen sneers. She kind of pulled back from those attempts with a kicked why bother.
Becoming the woman she knew she was had also became a major eye opener. There was this huge difference in the lives of women; you could have such a great time if you were one of the slutty types or the beautiful girls.
God sometimes she just hated herself, sometimes she wondered really hard if she made a huge mistake.
Birthday’s, and the Holidays where hell.
Serra never seen herself as beautiful. Someone called her a handsome woman once, that cut inside a bit. Of course she was a Trans-woman and her origins had made a difference. She hadn’t come to terms with those deeply buried feeling until she wrecked her knee and between the vivid dreams from the painkillers and then having to take dance as part of her physiotherapy.
But she had been so late in her opinion. She was a big girl; six foot three, she had been a good size but she lost a lot of muscle mass and size do to the hormones she’d been on and went through three years of hell in a corset during that time so she had a bit of an hourglass shape. Her breasts had helped, she’d gotten through everything she had ended up with an impressive set of EE’s It had surprised her a lot never expecting to take after her female relatives so much, most of the Foster women were very well busted. To Serra it was one of her only connections to the family she’d lost and her sort of female saving grace.
She wasn’t one of the beautiful ones and she couldn’t just couldn’t go the route of so many transitioning girls it seemed and get into one aspect of the sex trade or another. So she stayed plugging away at the contracting thing and it wasn’t what she ever had thought in her dreams about being a woman would be like… but she also got herself a pretty decent work reputation and all that work helped her through relationship, after relationship after relationship.
Steven had been her last kick at the can. He had been a decent guy, worked for UPS and had a nice body from loading boxes. He and her had been going out for seven weeks and had been lovers and things were going good right up until she told him. He freaked out, he didn’t get violent he wasn’t that kind of guy but he freaked and he left.
Before that she had tried the honesty is the best policy thing which left her cold and lonely or with a guy like Adam who was looking for a she-male and not a girl. She felt cheated by guys so often because sex with them just was not anything like she’d ever read about sex and while she had enjoyed it there wasn’t anything that sparked her like in the stories she’d read. No great fireworks, no world shattering orgasms.
Not that she had transitioned because of that. It wasn’t it was about feeling right in her skin. It wasn’t that huge oh my god moment we she transitioned and got her surgery either but Serra always liked to think of it as the removal albeit a slow one of the worlds biggest and heaviest body cast.
Serra sighed and padded out to the kitchen and put on some water for her tea and made juice in her juicer…lemon, pineapple, an apple and a red pepper and lots of carrots mixing it with orange juice from a carton and let it get chilled. The pulp went into bran muffin mix she used for waffles and had them with her Japanese green tea and peanut butter on top as she did her Pilates and stomach crunches, she watched what she ate, not that she was overweight but she was big enough as it was.
Too tall and big shouldered, and bigger than feminine working muscles on her arms and her legs. She was never happy with her sandy blonde hair and washed out blue eyes, her tan hid some of her freckles. She worked her middle a lot trying to keep that waist to hip ratio she wanted so much. She did keep it smooth and had the nice hint of abs. Too big in the chest to jog she turned to biking a lot in her spare time.
She took a shower, that she liked, loved actually because she got to feel the water cascade down her breasts and through her legs flowing in the right way. It even got her motor running as it were and she had looked up and found herself one of those good shower wands that always made those mornings a bit brighter and made starting the day a bit better…like today.
She had a simple routine simply for work; some Secret body powder spray, and her Dove underarm she gave herself one little spritz of Obsession perfume in her hand with some baby oil and mixed it together. Yes it sounds strange for all of that but she would be working enough in the heat and with a whole bunch of dirty sweaty guys. She’d be just as bad by the end of her shift but she wanted to smell at least like a sweaty girl.
Her clothes were simple too, a really good stand up sports bra, her Haines for her panties and a thin white tank top and a pink scoop necked tee-shirt styled top. It was alright to wear pink even at the job site, “Pinky” from the Reno show Holmes on Homes made it okay. She tossed on a red plaid work shirt over that and wore army BDU pants. They were the greatest things for work with all the pockets and everything.
She packet her lunch a few slices of French baguette and getting together herself a dish of salsa that she added a bit of lemon juice to and some chopped up a tuna steak added a bit of diced avocado and a touch of cilantro. She’d eat this sort of seviche-salsa on top of the bread and have some tea with it. Yeah strange sounding but Serra had worked with a lot of Hispanics over the years and loved a lot of the food they made and a lot of it was healthier than most stuff out there. She’d worked enough jobs and eaten enough fast food on some of those jobs that she was really sick of it.
An energy bar and two granola bars and she grabbed her tools and put stuff into the back of her truck and hopped in and headed to work. Early morning traffic in Vegas was the shits but she did as she usually did and stopped off at Harlet’s (yeah a play on hookers, guess where the cartoon poster girl’s holding her cupcakes?) A favorite coffee shop/bakery of hers and bought the usual a box of bagels and two boxes of doughnuts even if she rarely had one she still bought for her guys.
Yeah her guys, she’d enough experience over the jobs she was a forewoman on this rebuild of this older country club and golf course going into this combination new facility but with its own casino lounge and large hotel all owned and paid for by The Palms Casino Company. It was a lot of work and she was just one crew on the site of many but she still ran a crew of twenty workers. Some didn’t want a chick running things but when push came to shove the tough Baltimore girl came out sometimes.
It was a long hot day, the guys were good and they ended up finishing the framing on the Pro-shop or what would be the Pro-shop and there was a lot of just plain hard work. Where some crew chiefs would walk around giving orders and drink coffee Serra just couldn’t work that way. No once the guys were working she carried things they needed to them like more stock, cut things for them on the saws and joined in when they needed it plus she stepped in and spotted a few minutes here and there when they had to go for a break, some water or a smoke. She never bitched about them taking a break, but she made sure that they weren’t abusing her good will. All and all she got results and as anytime they got done one part of the job she passed it up the food chain and got the architects and the boss to make sure it was done the way they wanted before moving onto the next step.
She packed her stuff away and got invited over to Palos house with the guys for his daughter’s fifteenth birthday party. It’s a big thing in the Mexican households. Their version of a sweet sixteen. It wasn’t something that she’d been too before and she went home to shower and change and then pick something up as a gift for the birthday girl.
She breathed a sigh of relief getting home and parked out in the driveway and smiled seeing the neighbors kid Austin finishing her lawn. Not a close neighbor she didn’t have that many out here. It was an older Vegas neighborhood that had gone to seed and now over the last ten years had been coming back.
He stopped the mower and smiled at her taking a good teenaged boy’s stare at her that always made her smile and feel good. She was twice her age but it still felt good. “I’m just about done here Ms. Foster you want me to do anything else?”
“Actually if you wouldn’t mind you could give my truck a wash and a quick go over inside and stuff? I’ve got to go to one of those Quincinera parties for a co-worker and I’d like it to look decent. There’ll be another twenty bucks in it for you.”
“Sure, not a problem Ms. Foster.”
Serra sighed in relief getting her tools set and situated on her work bench and headed inside her air-conditioned safe haven and stripped out of her work clothes and stepped into the shower with a low moan of relish as the luke-warm water took off the first layers of dirt band grime and a long work day.
She didn’t get her usual relief out of her shower time not with Austin outside…She still felt much better and mixed her baby oil and perfume mix a bit stronger using a brand she bought called Daze, it smelled wonderfully of the daisy flower. She let the AC get her kind of chilled and cooled off while she decided what to wear. Serra wasn’t a tom boy type as much as she was one, but not a girly girl either. She liked to think of having landed somewhere right in the middle. She tore through her closet looking for something just right. She was in a sort of way dressing to fit in with those Hispanic ladies that’d be there. She finally decided on a really comfortable flowing long skirt and a light blue camisole styled tee-shirt with a nice pair of her lace matching bra and panties. After playing with her hair as it was drying she added the rare touches of make up and a bit of peach colored lipstick and a bit of jewelry. A nice pair of flat sling backs set her off just right and after packing her denim purse with some essentials she headed out and smiled at Austin.
It was cute the way he had taken off his shirt to show off his nicely coming along sixteen year old body. He had done a nice job on her truck having washed it and used the pressure nozzle on the hose and had cleaned off her tires and the bed of her truck. It shone with a buffed coat of Nu-finish and the inside had been vacuumed out and been given the Armor-all finish and even the seats got a blasting of Febreaze.
She fished out two twenties and a ten. “Here you did a great job on the truck and the yard looks great as usual Austin.”
“Thanks Ms. Foster, anytime you need anything…uhm you’ve got my number…”
She smiled and blushed just a little bit and Serra would be lying if a few times the idea of being his Mrs. Robinson hadn’t been in her head. She slipped up into the truck a smile on her face as she felt his eyes on her full breasts and her legs and the rest of her as she left.
It was kind of a sweet wistful kind of thing that smile.
Serra ended up going to a few stores in one of the better galleria style strip malls on the way there. For the birthday girl she splurged and bought Teresa an I-pod nano and a gift card for fifty dollars for the I-tunes. For Hector’s wife she had bought a large bouquet of flowers and she bought four six pack bottles of Crush soda, two orange and a lime and a grape.
Hector welcomed her at the door and hugs were exchanged and she gave Alyssa the flowers and with the kids that were there the sodas was welcome. Teresa loved the gift and Hector said. “Serra, you shouldn’t have it was too much.”
“Hector, I’m alone pretty much. You and the guys are as close to family as it gets. And it’s her day. Let me just have a chance to spoil her today alright?”
“Alright Serra, you keep that chin up eh, you might just find some one just yet.”
The party was in Hectors very decent sized backyard and there were a lot of people there and Serra was relieved that she wasn’t the only non-hispano there but like a lot of places now there was a good mix considering a lot of these were the family of Teresa’s school friends. There were nearly a hundred people there and the food was really excellent. Not to be too much a stick in the mud she told her usual diet to go stick it and ate enjoying the real home cooked Mexican food not the greasy cheese drowned gunk most people get from the chain places. There was some standard far there as well that most of the kids were eating like burgers and hot dogs. It was a good party with just over a hundred people there and there was a dance floor set up and dancing.
There was a lot of the music for the kids and hector had hired a D.J. and after it got darker out and all those lights came on the adults got to dance a little bit too. This was music she liked. Elvis, The Beatles, Roy Orbison, Richie Valens, Bobby Darin and those fun to dance too good old songs that she loved. Yeah she was a generation or so behind sometimes but who…what girl wouldn’t like songs like “Are you lonesome tonight?” or “Love me tender.” or “Always on my mind.” Or that song that woke her up this morning and squeezed at her heart. “Only the lonely.”
That was more than true even here with all these people. She'd be flirted with until she was asked to dance and when she stood she just…well intimidated a lot of the guys there. And forget it when it came to those slow sweet sad love songs that she saw the couples both older and younger dancing to.
Serra made her apologies and left getting into her truck and turned her radio on and she drove listening to a channel of the satellite radio that was playing those sad same songs. Eyes leaking tears as she just once more tried to deal.
Maybe it was just accident, maybe it was fate but she had stopped at an all-night gas station to dry her eyes and get a coke and gas up her truck. She was on her third drink when she heard this sound across the street at Kitten’s a strip club and saw some guys and a girl. There were three guys dressed in that not wise guy but wise guy lounge lizard kind of way. You know shirts with the big lapels, cheap leather jackets, sunglasses, too much jewelry.
One of them smashed the girl with a back handed slap and they pushed her down the alley.
“I’m fucking out of my tree.” Serra murmured to herself as she walked across the street into the alley.
That was her name. It wasn’t just her stage name either but it was legally her name. She had it changed when she left her old life behind.
She hadn’t always been who she was in fact she had lived a long time in a shell of a life a woman trapped in a body that was all wrong.
All hell had broken loose with her family when she had told them, she had told them after she had gotten herself on her way with the meds and the letters from her doctors and shrinks and everything as she had started her RLT. That was three years out of college and just things inside were that bad she had to do something. It was after she had tried to end it with pills and had been rescued by a neighbor. Her company had sent het to a shrink for the stress and her suicide attempt and that was when she had things just pour out of her.
It was a shock to say the least for a family from rural North Carolina. Her dad had a fit but after a three week bender he was sort of okay with it. Her mom was good better than her dad but careful around her and her brother had actually shrugged and said. “Not my life, not my balls getting cut off. Just don’t date any of my friends.”
She had made a face. “Eeew, Chris first off all of your friends are assholes or still emotional infants and secondly I’m gay.”
“Yeah I know, like I said don’t date any of my friends.”
“No dumbass, I’m a lesbian.”
He had that look that guys get when the hamster falls off the little wheel in their heads. He was still trying to figure it out when her mom took her dad’s glass of Wild Turkey and drained the entire thing gulping it down.
He dad looked just as confused as her brother had and between the two of them she swore they’d soon set off the smoke detector from all that heavy thinking.
Her sister had freaked. Apparently her being a lesbian was worse that her brother becoming her sister?
The best thing was her grandparents she had her dad’s parents as the only surviving grandparents and her Grams had said. “For heavens sake you idiots it’s not like she died, she’s still family, still my grandbaby and life’s too damned short to be miserable. Steven was miserable.”
Grand-dad had looked her up and down then just hugged her and said. “You’re still Scout to me y’know they’ve got girl scouts right.”
Scout had always been his nickname for them ever since they were a child. And for him to say that and just love her enough not to care about that stuff was huge. She had sniffled and said. “Yeah, there’s girl scouts I always wanted to be one even back then.”
Her mom had been adjusting. Her dad and her brother seemed mitigated by her sexual orientation which she almost found sort of insulting but since she knew them for the big farm boy lugs that they were she didn’t get bent out of shape about it. Nancy her sister was still downright weird about it and kind of hostile in a quietly bitchy passive aggressive sort of way.
However not everyone had been pleased. Mostly a lot of the people in town at first. She was fired at her job at the call center and lost her medical coverage. People gave her dirty looks and said things just out of earshot and were generally just being a bunch of redneck retards.
Her job search was pointless and people had been pretty much blackballing her. The last straw was when she heard from one of the few friends she still had that a loan her bother needed was going to be denied mostly because of her.
So she took a job in Los Vegas at a call center and it was there she got into the life of being a stripper. Her SRS and rent and her meds were costing her a fortune and a girl she was working with was moonlighting at the Cherry Girl’s club and she timidly went and tried it out. At first she was a draw because she was pre-op and then she was just good at it after her SRS.
She hadn’t ever intended to be in this life. She went to school to be a CPA and was really good with numbers and stuff and then this came up. A good stripper could make an awfully addictive amount of money in a hurry even if you didn’t turn a trick.
Silky had taken out several loans and had some work done too when she had been in her SRS time. She had small but natural breasts that she didn’t get implants for but she did have some extra put into her hips and some extra padding into her butt. She had her hair removed by laser and had the surgery by laser too to get rid of her glasses. Some money to fix and veneer her teeth, a nose job and the rest had been just lucky…she more than passed silky had been born with just enough Native American in her blood to give her that natural straight dark brown hair and a nice set of legs. She was five nine, brown eyed and had this amazing skin tone she got from some part of the family giving her this sort of light toasted almond colored skin.
She was popular but she was work popular. She had done the fast and the furious girl on girl lifestyle a bit but there were a lot of girls who snubbed her once they found out about her past. Some didn’t like her work or her life style. She never hooked and other that the odd bit of recreational drugs at a few parties in her first two years in town she didn’t really do any of that either. And there’s nothing like working around bars, booze and drunks all the time to either make you a lush too or like her and really barely drink at all.
It was getting to be a lonely life. She have quit if she still wasn’t drowning in debts.
Tonight it was being work popular that got her into trouble. The guy was at the club with two of his buddies and he’d been acting like a jerk but a jerk who made good at the tables and she was making really decent money from him and his two boys and their tips.
After getting really drunk and way to grabby during a few lap dances they got the boot and she thought they had left.
She’d just gone past the second alley when they stepped out in front and behind her. The ringleader was this tallish thin kind of guy with mousey tangled hair and that thin face with the close set eyes and sort of hooked nose that gave him that human rat appearance. He was the guy dishing out most of the money and he’d obviously usually got passed up by most ladies so he had thought money talked.
He sneered at her and she could smell the mix of different drinks on his breath. He spit and the gob of it hit between her toes on her right foot of the open toed shoes she was wearing.
“Well look who the fuck it is here. It’s the little whore who thought she was too good for us.”
She tried to back away or go to another side but his two friends shoved her around laughing like they though shoving a girl around was fun. Silky was scared, things like this turned really bad on a dime, and these guys could really hurt her. She tried to reason with them.
“Look guys, I told you that I don’t mean any offense by it but I’m not interested.”
“Fucking bullshit, you were plenty interested when you were nekkid dancing around and grinding on my crotch.”
“That’s my job. I’m paid to dance.”
“You took my money fast enough that means you’re a whore. You’re a whore and we’re gonna get our monies worth.”
Silky tried to scream but one of the guys covered her mouth with his hand and she bit him she went for her pepper spray cursing the fact that she was too scared of guns to ever own one. Rat face backhanded her so hard her hearing literally grayed out to white noise and he vision faded to black for a few seconds.
By the time it came back the three of them were hauling her into the alley and she struggled.
“No!, No!, Lemme go! I’d never had slept with any of you I’m a lesbian!”
“Bullshit, you all say that just because you haven’t had a real man fuck you right. All you lesbo-cunts are like that.”
That’s when she saw her. This tall long sandy blonde haired blue eyed large breasted amazon in a powder blue camisole top and a pretty loose swishy skirt come stalking into the alley and didn’t even say a word as she just reached over and grabbed a length of heavy pipe and choked up on one end and caught one of them in the knee with an almost vicious combination baseball/golf swing.
What ever she hit went crunch. Tweedle-Dee went down screaming and that’s when they turned around to face the amazon. Tweedle-Dum swung with a fist and the amazon just leaned up out the way like when you see it get done like that at the fights. Then she took a step back after that and swung hitting him in that wrist with a stroke like she was splitting firewood.
He screamed and went down with a fucked up wrist and rat face pushed Silky to the ground and snatched up a brick and was going to throw it at her. Silky screamed look out and the amazon turned but still caught it in the head and it rocked her head back.
But she didn’t go down. Blood ran from a gash now on her forehead but she didn’t go down, she didn’t even cry. She just stared hard at rat face as he pulled a lock blade knife and flicked out the blade with his wrist and shuffled back and forth on his feet nervously.
The amazon lifted the pipe and she pointed at the roof top that was on the other building across the end of the alley they were in, like she was one of those baseball players, the blood ran down her cheek and dripped off her chin and she still stared rat face down.
He adjusted his grip on his knife and snarled at her drunkenly. “What the hell bitch, you think you’re A-rod or something?” he waved the knife again. “This ain’t no brick this time. You ain’t gonna be batting shit.”
The amazon finally spoke. Her voice was like some late night radio vixens. “If you don’t take you little friend and fuck off that’s where I’m going to put your nuts.”
Then it became a stare down. Rat face shifting from foot to foot and looking more and more cowardly as the seconds had passed. Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum recovered enough to get to their feet and ran hobbled away as fast as they could. Rat face looked like her just lost his courage by numbers and when the tall blonde woman noticed them taking of her lip twitched up into this slight smile.
She started walking towards rat face in almost languidly still staring him down, still bleeding, she hadn’t blinked once. Rat face got this look on his face like he filled his pants and turned tail and ran as fast as he could out the far side of the alley and down the street.
Silky stared up at the woman. In her walking up to confront rat face she had come right up beside her. Tall, over six feet, long willowy blonde hair and a tan that hid this light dusting for freckles and these beautiful blue eyes that reminded her of the sea on a rainy day.
She got to her feet and couldn’t help but stare again. The amazon ditched the pipe and frowned at her dirty hands a second before looking at her. She took Silky’s breath away. Tall, gorgeous of she thought so with these beautiful breasts in what looked like a Victoria secret bra and this cute powder blue camisole, she was such a juxtaposition of feminine beauty and hot sexy strength.
She honestly thought this woman was the most beautiful woman she’d ever seen. And…and she had come to her rescue…no one had ever come to her rescue in her life.
The woman looked at her and there was kindness and concern there replacing the tough chick she’d just seen. “Are you okay?”
“I…I…I am now. God thank you, thank you so much…”
“I just saw what happened and I just couldn’t sit there. If I called the police they’d still haven’t have gotten here quick enough. I suppose I should call them now.”
“No, don’t I’m okay, and you might get into trouble. The guys you hit might press charges even if you came to help me. Sometimes they look down on that stuff.” She grabbed her purse and took out some Kleenex. “Here, you’re still bleeding.” Silky walked over and reached up and started blotting away at the blood. “It doesn’t look like you’ll need stitches though.”
The amazon smiled a little shyly, this close their chests were just grazing occasionally and Silky felt her nipples tighten and get oh so hard. “Yeah he just grazed me but head wounds bleed a lot.”
Silky smiled back. “You’ve had a lot of those?”
“I used to box as a kid.” The amazon said with this awkward, cute, embarrassed shrug.
“I believe that.” Silky said as she stared at the woman. God she thought, I’ve never felt like this before. She’s so beautiful. “I’m Silky.”
“Serra. It’s nice to meet you.”
“Listen…Serra? We should get you cleaned up, get this disinfected at least.”
Serra looked backwards. “It’ll be okay. I’ve got my truck; can I give you a lift home?”
“Sure, I’d like that. It’d definitely beat taking the bus.”
They walked across the street and she wasn’t sure why but she reached out and slid her hands into Serra’s. She saw Serra look and gave her this sweet and odd little smile.
She honestly had no idea where that whole thing had come from. She was kind of a shy person most of the time and it was like there was part of that kid she used to be from the dock working family in Baltimore come out.
She’d put most of that life away, buried it like her family had buried who she was. But you can’t really erase who you used to be. Even if that “Guy” was just not who you really were it’s still your past, it’s still who you were.
So she guessed that kid who boxed like every boy in the family, who got into scraps in “the neighborhood.” who mixed it up playing hockey or fighting because a brother or family or a friend need back up. She guessed it bubbled to the surface. Those guys were going to really hurt this girl Silky. They might have raped her or even killed her. The way she was raised, even if she didn’t have that anymore just took over.
You don’t, you don’t ever hit a woman.
Her dad had beat that into her with a whupping when she had been seven and she pushed a girl she’d been arguing with at the park. It wasn’t the beating that gave that so much meaning it was the angry disappointment from him and the rest of the entire family for weeks that drove it home. And yes he had apologized to the girl. She’d still been a brat about it and so had her mother but her dad said it wasn’t about them.
It was about being a man and there’s things that men do and don’t do. Serra had almost slipped there and then into that funk of loss.
Then Silky slipped her hand into hers and smiled at her and that choking knot of pain went away. God she was beautiful, slender, curvy and perky mixed together in this sexy sultry package. Oh…damn… She thought in a bit of surprise and wonder. I’m…am I attracted to her? But I’m a woman? I’ve gone through so much to be me. I’m supposed to be a woman; I’m supposed to like guy’s right?
It was still sort of mulling around in her head as she paid for the gas and bought a Klondike bar. Silky was kind of hugging herself and looking over the truck when Serra came out of the gas station. “Are you sure you’re okay Silky?”
The girl wasn’t able to talk, what happened was starting to hit her and she gave her this shaky looking vulnerable shrug still hugging herself. Serra opened the passenger door of the truck and pulled out the blanket from behind the seat and wrapped it around the dusky sultry girl with the mascara run eyes. She rubbed Silky’s arms through the blanket trying to warm her through the shakes. It was more than just being decent to another human being; it was…she wanted to make things better. God she really wanted to kiss Silky right then…you ever seen that distressed beauty?
Silky was very much that right now. Straight dark hair messed up and her mascara ruined giving her that hurt, hold me, look. You know the one, it’s that ache in there when she looks at you with this look of just…… please.
Serra had never been close to someone like that. She had never had someone look at her like that. She swore that just looking at this girl…woman. It made her heart beat faster.
“Here, let’s get you home.” Serra softly said and almost sort of gallantly helped Silky up into the seat of her truck and made sure everything was in before she took out the Klondike bar. She gently put it on Silky’s face where rat face had hit her. Silky looked moved…amused? Serra shrugged. “Hey, Ice cream’s good when you’ve had a shitty day right?”
There was this unexpected beautiful laugh that bubbled up out from Silky that made something in Serra just…she wanted to hear that some more. She needed to hear that some more. And that look after her being upset, that I wasn’t expecting to smile, smile…Serra bit her lip as she closed the door then went around and slid herself up and into the truck.
It was late still and everything that happened she turned the trucks heater on and drove carefully following Silky’s directions.
The place was in one of the not too bad trailer courts. Silky had a small deck and an old above ground pool with a modest baby barn along with an old privacy fence. Serra parked and went around helping Silky out of the truck and to her door. She held the screen door open while Silky purse dove for keys while trying to juggle the ice cream bar. Serra reached over and took the ice cream bar smiling at her.
“Thanks Serra, here come in.” Silky opened the door and turned on the lights.
It wasn’t too bad, about fifteen years old but not all beat to hell or worn out. You sort of entered in the hall just before the kitchen/dining area. Red maple laminate flooring in the halls and the kitchen and what looked like pine styled from what she could see in the master bedroom and the living room. Silky led Serra into the kitchen dining room area, still nice she really didn’t have a lot of stuff in either, In fact the coffee pot and the toaster and the microwave looked used the most. Hmm, not a cook she though to herself as she saw an impressive rack on the wall of take out menu’s.
She passed Silky the ice cream bar and she put it into a fairly empty freezer. “Thanks…I’ll be right back.” She watched Silky slip away and she shook her head to clear it after a few moments. Whoa, where is all of this coming from? Even asking the question of herself didn’t really get her any closer. She had nothing against gays or Lesbians it’s just she never really thought of herself as being like that. Before she had transitioned she had liked girls but there had always been something just…off.
Serra looked around for a couple of mugs before finding some instant coffee and heated up the milk in the cups in the microwave so it was steamed and then added a single teaspoon of sugar and one of Encore? Huh, who drinks that any more? She mused as she stirred everything together getting a little froth going. Silky came out from down the hall with a big nylon multi-compartment bag full of stuff for all kinds of first aid emergencies. She set the coffee’s down on the dining room table. “I hope you don’t mind but I made us some coffees.” She asked silky.
“No, uhm not at all. It’s kind of nice to have someone just make you one without being asked.” She took a sip and smiled. “This is really good, better than my poor cups of Joe.”
“I’ve had lots of practice. Lot’s of really bad coffee on a lot of job sites.”
“Well it’s really good, kinda like a latte.” She moved up close to Serra, standing over her actually and started to use a cloth and peroxide to clean the wound on her forehead. Serra couldn’t help bur to inhale her sweet scent, womanly, perfumed sort of this light vanilla scent only slightly offset by what happened earlier. She couldn’t have stopped the ache in her body that was growing or the fact her nipples were getting so hard that they hurt if she tried.
Silky was so…
So, No she wasn’t really trying.
It only took a few minutes but the intimate closeness seemed to last longer. When silky finally fixed a band-aid over the cut she smiled and looked down into Serra’s eyes. “There, all done.” She stayed there some more then ran her fingertips through Serra’s hair.
“Can I kiss you?”
“Please…I…I’ve been wanting to….” Silky leaned down cutting her off as she tilted Serra’s head up by her chin and kissed her. Softly and slowly and deeper than Serra knew that kisses went inside of herself. It was everything every other kiss she had ever had in her life hadn’t been and it was…it was perfect.
Silky sat down straddling her lap and leaned against Serra her taut perky B cups pressing into Serra’s lush full succulent EE’s and even through the clothes they both wore their aroused and hard nipples grazed and rubbed over each other making them do these appreciative little moans of pleasure in each other’s mouths. Serra wrapped her strong arms around Silky to hold her and pulled even tighter into her. Silky moaned just a little louder and her eyes danced a little.
Serra had never tasted another’s woman’s lips and there was this softness mixed with this slickness of their wet mouths and lipstick that was melding together in almost this sensuous promise of the way that their bodies would feel together.
Soft…satiny…gently sliding and pressing against each other in this embrace. Sometimes a kiss is just a kiss and sometimes a kiss is a promise of so much more.
They broke the kiss and stared deeply into each other’s eyes then kissed again. Every time they did that Serra could see something there, someone there and it more and more felt like the someone she had no idea she’d been looking for. The kissing became touching and Serra found her hands running up and down Silky’s back and down to her bottom where she’d rest her hands and just cup, not really squeeze but just cup Silky’s amazing ass.
Silky on the other hand was a bit more forward. Serra had never felt like this as Silky lifted up Serra’s camisole top and She lifted her arms to left the sultry beauty take her shirt off of her. “God, Oh god Silky…” She breathed as those delicate hands touched her very achingly sensitive breasts through her lacy lavender Victoria’s Secret bra. Those hands knew what they were touching and what they were doing more than any lover she had ever had before. She was panting though pleasure so exquisite as she unzipped Silky’s mini skirt and Silky kissed her shortly but eagerly said. “Hold onto me.”
Serra held on as she watched while silky slid up enough to shimmy her skirt off her hips and bottom the sat back down and leaned into Serra’s grip in a stripperesque display slid her stocking clad legs up while being held enough to sexily pull the mini skirt off and let it fall to the floor. She straddled Serra’s lap again but showing off her black French lace panties with the matching black stay up stockings that were some how even more enticing now because of the ladders and tears from what had happened earlier. She drank in the experience, stared at Silky and kissed her long and deeply and passionately. God she had never been this wet before in her life and her clitty had never felt so hard. And as much as she wanted to have things done to her by this sultry dark vixen…Serra want to do those things to her more.
Serra stood scooping silky up with her in her arms and she carried her down the hall to the bedroom. Silky’s eye’s widened and her nostrils flared in the rush of it, the excitement and she had started to kiss Serra over and over as she wrapped her legs around Serra’s waist and excited murmured. “Yes…Yes…oh please fuck yes…” all the way down the hall until they got to the doorway and her hands shot out to grab the door frame.
There was this look of…there was this look of something wrong there on her face, in her eyes. Serra stared searching thinking…does she know? Was I made? What if she hates me for this? I should tell her, if she hates me then it hasn’t gone too far.
They both said at the same time. “I wasn’t born a girl!”
“Whhhat!” again both of them.
“But, you’re…” Silky.
“And you’re…” Serra.
They actually stood there for a few minutes staring at each other, searching, looking for those signs. Serra was the first to look down and away. Silky took one hand off the doorframe to turn her chin up and look Serra in the face.
“No…don’t, don’t even go there Serra. Even before I knew this I thought you were the most amazing and stunning woman that I’ve ever met….I still think that.”
She kissed Serra deeply and there was this almost full body sigh of relief when Serra returned the kiss…well it became kisses.
When they finally broke for air Serra looked at silky long, long enough to make her blush. “I still can’t tell. I can’t see anything but you. I had no idea….I…I …I thought that I was always pretty easy to read.”
Silky sighed and wrapped both arms around Serra’s neck. “I really wasn’t sure either, I mean there’s some tells I guess but I thought that you were like uhm…I thought you were like one of those muscle chicks, not the crazy ones who try to look like beef jerky but y’know…glamazon.”
“Glamazon?” Serra stared at her one eyebrow raised.
“Yeah…Uhm Glamour girl meets amazon…I…I… I’ve always had a thing for girls like you… (Blushes) and… and …I mean most…okay, no t-girl I’ve ever knew had breasts like yours. I mean you see big ones all the time when the go all silicone and stuff but yours don’t move like that…you’re move like their real, like they’re perfect.” She blushed again and Serra couldn’t help but smile and kiss her.
“Well I’m not sure about the glamazon thing but these are all mine, naturally grown at home.”
“Yes really, apparently there’s a genetic component when you’re developing boobies and let’s just say the women on both sides of my family have been keeping the tit-fairy busy for generation on generation.”
“Wow, were you surprised?”
“Yes, no I’ve actually really liked it. It makes me feel more like one of the women in my family and even as big as they are they work with my big frame.”
“Big frame? God, Serra you’re stunning.”
“Not everyone thinks so. I’ve had comments….”
“Well fuck them! I think you’re beautiful…and sexy…and brave…”
They started kissing again this time slipping into Silky’s bedroom and Serra laid her down on the bed and kissed her while working herself out of her own skirt letting it fall in a pool of fabric at her feet. And getting silky out of her top and…Serra stood and Silky stood and padded over to her stereo and turned on some music and she reached for her bra when Serra pull her over by her wrist and into a dance while the radio played. “Only you.” by The Platters. Both close together in their lingerie dancing together…when Silky laid her head on Serra’s breast and let out this sigh…It was the single most romantic moment of Serra’s life.
She finished the dance and picked Silky up again and carried her to the bed. Silky let out this sigh of. “Serra…god I love when you do that.” Serra kissed her then long and slowly working at unhooking Silky’s bra to reveal these lovely B cup tanned pert globes she lowered her head, blonde willowy locks falling over her lover’s skin raising teased gooseflesh. She took a lovely dark nipple into her mouth and suckled it over and over before swirling her tongue around it letting her taste buds interplay with the tiny super sensitive nubbly bits of the areolas. Silky cried out and writhed on the bed until her hips and pelvis found Serra’s knee and she began to push herself against it.
Serra moved from that breast replacing the attention of her soft supple lips with that of her hand…a hand that had come to know what a breast wanted and needed through her own experiences. She left just a little bit of their now mixed lipstick there and saliva which her fingers used to Silky’s very vocal delight as she turned her attentions to the other breast.
Back and forth, back and forth and moving her knee in rhythm to the movement of her lovers hips. Never having felt like this, so real so alive and this, this was the reason for everything she had ever felt. Why all the men and boyfriends had never worked out or just didn’t do “it” she was always meant to be a woman, more sure of that by the second but she was also meant to be a woman who loved women.
As much as there was pleasure, there was this weight at finding out some missing piece of herself that took this experience even higher.
Serra cried out herself as silky had run her hands up her sides then over her arms even squeezing her fingers on Serra’s defined muscles before unclasping her bra and releasing Serra’s full, lush ripe breast and took a nipple of Serra’s into her mouth. It was good, better than good as Silky sat herself up and started worshipping Serra’s breasts. Women…they don’t paw or squeeze too hard. They touch; graze fingertips and pads over super sensitive flesh. They heft a breast up to longing lips knowing that just little Ooooh of having that weight lifted by warm gentle hands takes it to a place that’s just better. Silky was that good to Serra’s breasts she dipped her hand into her own panties and cried out. “Sil…Sil…oh...Ffff…ohfuck…oh…Silky…..” she had an intense orgasm and let out her lover’s name on passion steep breath. Serra never had a lover with soft sexy lips slowly drag them giving micro kisses into the fold of where her breasts meet the rest of her.
They kissed passionately when silky had come up for air and as they were doing so they were a bit clumsy and quick and frantic in getting their panties off and Serra tore the wrecked stockings off of Silky’s legs in a fit of want and passion then pinned her lover to the bed and kissed her and kissed her then worked her way down her body and into the cleft of her sweet sex.
Serra had been with men, she’d given her fair share of oral sex and she wasn’t sure what she was going to expect but Silky…She didn’t taste like a man. Like the rest of Serra; Silky found out that her lover, her glamazon had a nicely long tongue. Serra knew, just knew what she was doing. She might have been more daunted with a GG but Silky and her shared the same parts and she knew what she liked…and this was so much different that any sex she’d ever had that she loved what she was doing, she loved the way Silky moved, smelled, cried out and came…she loved the way she tasted.
Hell she was sure that she was falling in love with her. That was as exciting as it was scary.
Serra used fingers too, she touched tickled entered and explored her lover. Before making her way back up Silky’s body to only take her legs and push them up her lovers body resting those dusky sexy legs over her strong shoulders until she could lean down and press breast to breast with silky for some more long and deeply loving kisses.
Backing off she spread her own legs and arched her hips until their labia touched and she moved…using her legs to push and grind her sex against her lovers…drenched soaking labia starting to slip and slide together and when Serra’s clitty touched Silky’s the effect was electric…erotic…electric and soon they got both lost into this grinding lip to lip, clit to clit frenzy that had them clenching and panting and sweating in the most intense orgasms they both ever had…Serra collapsed sated like she had never been and silky was still breathing hard and panting when slid down beside her and kissed her gently over and over pulling Silky into this face to face, breasts pressing together embrace before they literally fell asleep just unable to kiss anymore and the last thing they saw was each others eyes.
*** The Next morning…
Serra woke to the sound of Silky’s clock radio belting out. “Only the lonely.” She smiled down at the beautiful girl still sleeping and actually drooling a little on her left breast. She looked at the radio. “No, not anymore.” And carefully reached over and changed the station stopping when the more heavy tones of “Feel like making love.” By bad Company started playing. Silky woke up with a sexy sleepy “Hmmm?” and Serra rolled over on top of her and started to do just that and singing along to her as she did so.
Let’s just say it was a good thing it was the weekend.
*** Three months later…
Serra was happy.
She’d never been that happy in her entire life. And it was girl happy too. They went from that night to dating, At first twice in one week, then three times. Then soon spending the weekends together. When they weren’t together they texted like the kids do now and called each other often…doing all the cliché girl in love things she’d only read about.
Silky introduced Serra to the best sex she had ever had. It was so much like their very first time but Silky was into girls from the get go and had always known she was gay. Serra hadn’t and while she had done things with her hands or in the shower Silky introduced her to the wide, wide world of big girl toys.
The fact she wanted, needed, loved it when Serra was the top just was so out of Serra’s experience. The few guys she was with over the years were pretty much the dominants sexually in her experience. The fact that Silky adored Serra’s strength as they made love was just…Serra had really thought that part of her was never girl enough, never sexy or feminine.
It was a relationship like she never even dreamed existed.
Sometimes she’d go to Silky’s work and watch her dance and strip. She often tipped her well and Management had no problem with Silky giving her lap dances while she was on her breaks.
Serra had even gone in that third month to a stripercise class and learned some things herself. She made Silky a nice dinner on her birthday and put on some sensual music and gave her stripper girlfriend her own private strip-show and lap dance before sinking to between her legs and staying down there until she begged, and begged, and begged for Serra to take her.
*** Six months later…
Serra called out to Austin. “I’m not sure where she wants that!” As she carefully stacked the boxes with Silky’s collection of ceramic unicorns and fairies that she loved so much. She put them on a dolly and took them into the house to where Silky was all super sexy bouncy kind of giddy frantic at them finally moving in together.
She came in and kissed her passionately on the lips long enough for Silky to wrap her arms around her neck and more than long enough to give poor Austin a painful case of seventeen year old boy watching too lesbians making out. She broke the kissing just long enough to rub noses and tell Silky. “I love you, you’re such a girl.”
Unlike a lot of lesbians they both knew they didn’t do that fall in lust, let’s shack up together thing as soon as they had gotten together. Serra and Silky had actually dated. Actual dates in public taking full advantage of the whole idea of what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. They never caught much flak about being together. Serra even made dinner a few times and Silky would bring take out sometimes to the job sites. She couldn’t really cook that well but Silky knew every take out place around and every hole in the wall place that made something really, really good. Serra loved it when she’d dress all hot and slinky at the job site and show herself off to the guys.
“Holyfuck…” came out of poor Austin as he found their large Rubbermaid bin of their sex toys. They couldn’t help but to break the kiss laughing.
On his eighteenth birthday they invited him over and let him watch.
*** Christmas time December 12th….
“Serra you be careful up there!” Silky’s mom Loretta called out as her and Silky’s dad were stringing the Christmas lights in the first Christmas she had had in way too many years. “I will Loretta!, we just want to make this perfect!”
Silk’s dad had been over the moon when she had told them that she had finally had really met somebody. He was even happier when he found out that Serra was a construction contractor with her papers in three trades.
She had finished her job and they had packed up the things that they thought that they’d need and left to her parents place arriving just the day before Thanksgiving and were going to stay awhile.
Silk’s mom and dad and her grandparents had been over the moon that Silky wasn’t dancing anymore and she was the book keeper for Foster Construction Ltd. Serra having saved enough money and had enough credit with the banks to get enough loans to set up her own company and hire her own crew.
She got along well with Silky’s brother Peter; who worked running an auto body shop in town and was a pretty decent guy. Serra and he got along well with Pete reminding her of so many of the guys she’d worked with. Pete for all him being the typical guy’s guy had admitted that Serra was the very first “Chick” he ever had as a friend. It being kind of a way to hang out they both ended up fixing up stuff around all the houses of the family before the snow started to fly. How often are you going to get a carpenter, electrician and plumber to do free work.
It was funny that her sister had been kind of a cunt to Silky and Serra ever since they arrived. Still stuck in her ways she said it was because they were a lesbian couple and she was against that kind of stuff. She had wound herself up for her little spiel and was going to spout off at the Thanksgiving table when Holly her thirteen year old daughter said. “Mom, lighten the hell up, Aunt Silk isn’t the only girl in the family that’s a lesbian.” It turned out that she had been sexually active with her best friend since they were twelve and had been seeing each other in secret for about a year.
And that rocked her sister pretty good especially when said “girlfriend” was there as her daughters guest and after supper spent time making out on the back step. That had shocked her into a major re-think along with lots of booze while sitting with Silk and their mother and their grandmother. That night the Stevens women getting hammered together in the kitchen had changed her sisters attitude and started a sort of new bonding tradition amongst the women in the family.
Serra looked at Silk’s dad and smiled. The decorations were done and everything looked really nice. He passed her a Sam Addams as they sat on the peak of the roof together looking out over the farm.
“This is nice Paul…thanks for having me here and accepting me into the family. It’s……It’s been a long time since I’m had a place to go, had anything like this.” She took a drink of her beer and wiped at her eyes. He shifted over and sat next to her and wrapped his arm around her.
It had been too long since she had a father’s arm around her holding her and telling her. “Hey, listen sweet pea… things are going to be okay. I can’t even get where their heads are at turning on their family and everything like that. But you, you have us and you’re always gonna have us even if you and silky do that modern city thing and move on and…”
“There won’t be anyone else Paul. I love your daughter with all my heart and soul. Can I ask you something?”
“Sure sweet pea, anything.”
“I know that I’m not anything like what someone would call traditional, or Silky for that matter. But I’ve been thinking about this a lot.” Serra moved a bit so she could look him in the eye. “Sir, I’d like your permission to ask your daughter’s hand in marriage.”
“Well then, I think you’re gonna start havin to call me Dad.”
*** Christmas Eve…
Serra smiled and danced around with Silky as the family had a Christmas Eve get together as the presents were dropped off and the family and extended family all showed up for some homemade sweets and to relax before the mad dash that some of them would have to make later in the night.
She was having some Wild Turkey or Southern Comfort laced eggnog in a champagne glass while she danced with Silky to some lively Christmas tunes. Both of them for fun and each other dressed in some very naughty revealing stuff. Red lace for Serra where she was more fair skinned and white for Silky the rest being really short skirted bust revealing Mrs. Claus outfits.
They danced and kissed and had a really good time until it was getting close to when some of the family would have to leave. Paul nodded to Serra and she had gotten an empty glass and did that tinging thing to bring everyone to attention. She started talking turning so they all could see her and that she had their attention before facing Silky…
“Can I get everyone’s attention please? It was probably the loneliest time in my entire life when I met Silky. I can remember it almost every part of that day right down to waking up to that song Only the lonely on the clock radio waking me up when all I wanted to do was just curl up and cry. But it’ll never be a sad song for me, it’ll always remind me of the day my life finally all made sense, when everything fell into place.”
Serra looked at Silky who was tearing up then around at all the friends and family. They were all gathered around listening, hugging, holding onto each other while the fire crackled in the fireplace and the Christmas lights twinkled. She then turned back around to face Silky again.
“I’ve pretty much got everything I could have dreamed of in my life except for one thing.”
She took off her Santa styled stocking cap and smoothed out her hair with her hand then holding her really short skirt in place she took a knee in front of Silky and pulled out a Tiffany’s blue ring box from her cleavage and opened it up and held it up to the love of her life.
“I love you Silky Stevens, I love you more than anything in my life. Would you do me the honor of becoming my wife? Will you marry me?”
She reacted as only Silky would. Her eyes filling with tears and her hands waving up and down as she danced on the spot like she might just explode from the happy feelings in that so Silky, so girling out, good bawling squee, I’m so happy kind of way.
“Fuck yea… (She slaps a hand to her mouth and everyone gets a laugh.)…Yes, yes……….oh my god Yes!!!”
Serra slipped the ring that she’d been saving up for ever since they started living together on her finger. She just went with an elegant simple stone but one that was pretty good size. She had to hold Silky’s hand she was vibrating that much. Serra stood once the ring was on but picked her fiancé up into her arms. Silky was smiling and crying wrapped her arms around Serra’s neck and they started kissing.
*** My Part…
I was lucky enough to know both of them. I even got and invite to the wedding and it got me out of Vegas for the first time in my life. They live back east now, so their closer to family and everything. Both of them were a big influence in my life over the years. And as far as I know they’re still kissing each other that way.
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